Chapter 2: It's Up For You To Understand

Again, you're welcome to listen to a song that inspired me to twist the ending a little bit. The song Roger Rabbit by Sleeping With Sirens. Check it out if you wish.

"I love you." He whispered as she walked down the steps. He may have not said it to her face but, could you blame him? Her mixed signals were making him self-conscious and he didn't want to see how she'd react to those three words when she couldn't even talk to him about a kiss they just shared while she helped him out with his nose bleed. He wants to be able to hold himself together but he can't help but come unglued every time he sees Katherine Beckett.

(Kate's POV)

There was no way possible that I couldn't feel anything for Richard Castle. I strolled into the 12th precinct making sure that my face didn't show any sign of worry or the fact that the man I have strong feelings for just kissed me and I broke away. Esposito walked up to me, "Beckett, Bryan is in the interrogation room. Ryan tried seeing if he could get anything out of him. He hasn't said much except the normal 'It wasn't me'." I nodded and practically jogged my way into that interrogation room, the farther away from Castle the better. I didn't have time to see his face filled with that pained expression when I locked the door and ran away from him.

Marcus Bryan was sitting in his chair and quickly looked up to meet my eyes. I walked around him; I wasn't in the mood to sit down just yet. I placed my hands on the table in front of him.

"Why did you kill Melvin Anderson, Marcus?" my tone was sharp and waiting for his answer. He shook his head slightly.

"Like I told the other cop, I didn't kill 'em. I was at the zoo, yes but, I didn't kill that guy. I don't even know 'em." I stared at him; trying to find any distress, tone that showed he was lying, or anything that would prove that maybe he was our guy. Regardless, I was going to keep interrogating him. I knew damn well that he wasn't telling the entire truth.

"Marcus, I feel like you're holding back on some important information. You ran away from us, if you weren't guilty you wouldn't have ran." I raised my eyebrows.

"No, that's not why I ran, lady." He sighed and put his head in his hands, "I ran because I thought that white guy was coming to get me. I owe money to this dealer. I lied when I said I didn't entirely know Melvin. He was going to the same dealer as me. I didn't know him personally but, I knew of him."

I sat down in the chair above him "Who is your dealer? I need a name Marcus." He leaned forward and shook his head once again.

"If I tell you, he'll kill me." He leaned back and looked away.

I leaned forward as well, "Who will kill you, Marcus? I can protect you but, only if you tell me his name. If you don't cooperate, I cannot help you or keep you safe. Help me help you."

A sigh escaped his lips, "Tony Fletcher. He's an Italian business man, lives in upper Manhattan. He's my dealer. That's all I can tell you, detective."

I sat up straight, "Tony Fletcher. Okay, I'll keep this anonymous and have someone deliver you safely to your apartment. If you hear anything about Melvin, you call me." I handed him my card and walked out of the interrogation room to get Ryan.

(Rick's POV)

I sat down at my chair next to her desk. I was going to wait. I didn't care how long this took; I lost her too many times to let her slip through my fingers again. She can't hide her feelings for me when she knew I was the one for her. She was talking to Ryan but, glanced over to where I was sitting and darted her eyes back to Ryan. She didn't want to look at me and that feeling of not being wanted stung like a bee. I looked down at my hands. I'm a man. I'm not going to sit here and cry over her. I'm going to make sure that I keep my cool and if she was going to act like it never happened then, so was I. She turned on her heels, slowly walked over to her desk and sat down; she didn't look at me at all. She turned her eyes to look down at her file on Marcus Bryan. Esposito handed her a file on this guy named Tony Fletcher. I continued to look at her. My heart was aching, I couldn't take the pain. She was never going to let that wall come down for me and it pained me to know that maybe I had no chance at all. That kiss however, showed me otherwise. God, my life is going to be way more confusing if I don't find out if Kate feels the same way. I told her I loved her when she got shot at Montgomery's funeral but, like she said 'I heard you saved me. I don't remember anything because I blacked out.' It was my chance to tell her but, not here; not now. I didn't want to say it at the precinct and risk her telling me I could no longer shadow her in front of the boys and Gates.

Castle, maybe you should go home." She finally spoke up but, still didn't look at me.

"I'm not going home just because you don't want to talk to me, Kate. You know we need to discuss this. I'm not leaving until we do. Plus, you need me. You need my help on this case, that Fletcher guy, you can't get him on your own and you know it. I may not be a cop but, my theories help you out." I whispered making sure she could tell that I wasn't the happiest person at this moment. My tone caught her off guard.

"Castle, there is nothing to discuss. If you're going to stick around then, let's go." Her tone was rather icy. She got up, grabbed her coat and headed out the precinct.

We started to leave Manhattan, it seems like Tony Fletcher did deal to Bryan and Anderson but, he was out of town for a business meeting, fortunately, we found fingerprints on a pen in his office. We took it and were going to give it to Lanie to see if she found any prints and could match them. On the ride back to the precinct Gates told us to take the rest of the day off so, Kate turned the car around and started driving to the loft.

(Kate's POV)

I parked the car and waited for him to get out of the car. "See you tomorrow, Castle." He didn't move at all. He was staring out the window and refused to get out. I clutched the wheel bracing myself for his next move. He unbuckled his seatbelt and grabbed my hand.

"Kate, don't ignore what we have. What happened earlier, we can…..make it work? Give me a chance to prove it to you." I lowered my eyes to look down at his hand. This time however I turned and kissed him. I had no idea what I was doing, well, I did but, I just couldn't pretend like I didn't have feelings for Rick. I continued to kiss him, running my hands over his face and through his hair. There was no denying the sexual tension between us. He pulled away slowly wanting to say something but without thinking I whispered "Castle, I know you love me." He stopped and stared at me with shock coloring his face. There was something else in his facial expression, not only the shock but it seemed like rage. By the time I said what I had said I didn't realize that I said it out loud. God, this was going to make things bad…..very bad.

(3rd Person POV)

What happened next was probably the worst thing that would happen between them. Castle's voice began to rise and Beckett's breathing was becoming jagged.

"You said you didn't remember!" Beckett looked down at her hands.

"You don't understa-" Castle cut her off midsentence and shouted,

"No. You don't understand! You left me alone for three months. You needed space, I gave it to you. I thought you didn't remember. I took my time to wait for you and wait for you to break the walls down for me. What happened this morning, for a split second I believed you were going to let me finally in. You didn't and on top of that, you've known that I loved you and you sat on it for a year. I've loved you for four fucking years and all you did was ignore it. You know what that makes me feel like? I didn't think so. So don't sit here and tell me that I don't understand when you're the one lying to people. Maybe this is karma. I hurt so many women in the past and now it's happening to me. You're hurting me Kate and when you finally realize the pain you're causing me, come find me." The venom was spitting out with his tone. With that he got out the car, slammed the door and walked off.

Kate watched him walk off, she placed her head on the wheel, "Fuck."

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