I don't know what you would call this feeling. Tsuna Sawada confuses me. He's my friend...and yet I would never be able to admit it. I used to look at him as an obstacle I had to overcome, but that's not the case anymore.
When ever I see him with his family, I get a horrible feeling. He can make friends so easily, and I can't even begin to think that I would be able to like him. When ever I talk to him about something important, something that confuses me for days, he responds with an answer I can't talk back to. It aggravates me when he says it so nonchalantly. How can he be able to say it like that? Yet, I still go to him, ask him, find comfort in him in those hard times. It's so complicated, and yet he makes it sound so basic.
And here I am, standing on his doorstep, about to ring the bell. I can't seem to push the button. I'm afraid to hear the answer. The easy way he makes it sound, but I can't wait any longer. I need to talk to him. I need his guidance. I ring the doorbell, feeling regret and anxious at the same time. It's such a mixed feeling that I can't move or think properly. The door opens and my mind goes blank.
"Hello?"
I stare at him with uncertainty, and I'm allowed into the house. It's so familiar that it pains me inside. I sit down on the couch.
"Tsuna...... I depise you..." He looked me in the eyes, and I knew my answer... jealousy.