Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach or any of the characters. I only own Sayuri and her craziness.

A/N: After you read Chapter One, there is no specific order in which you must read the story. Just a collection of craziness. (They are meant to be short!)

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Hitsugaya sat in his office, doing.... Can you guess?... THAT'S RIGHT! Paperwork! Again! Boo~ You suck, Toshiro... No, not really; there was work to be done, and Matsumoto nor Sayuri were around to help him. Not that they ever were... Although, he had found out that Sayuri, when forced to work, was quite capable. Annoying, but capable.

Hitsugaya heard the door to his office open slightly, and looked up. A crack to the hall was visible, but no one was there.

"Geez..." he got up and walked to the door, sliding it open and looking around. By the wall, Sayuri was crouched down, staring at him. Her eyes were wide, observing and mysterious. Hitsugaya took a step back, shocked by her creepy expression.

"W-What do you need Sayuri?"

"You are...." she said in an oddly disturbing voice. She didn't finish her sentence, but those two words made Hitsugaya's stomach churn in wariness.

"I'm what?" he asked.

"You are... so short."

A vein in his forehead pulsed as he clenched his fist and ground his teeth together.

"And who the hell are you to talk?!"

"But I only recently came to the Soul Society. I've grown two inches in the past year... But you... you have not!"

Sayuri stood up and her face went from creepy-disturbing to incredibly sympathetic. Hitsugaya took another step back, putting a hand up to defend himself lest she do anything. And suddenly she was on him, her arms wrapped around him in a big hug.

"W-What are you doing?! Get off!"

"But they say lack of love and friends makes you stop growing! Along with imbalanced hormones!"

"What the hell are you talking about?! Get off me already!!"

Hitsugaya struggled with the girl, but no matter what he did he could not release himself from her grip. At last, she pulled away, and examined him up and down. A look of disappointment came over her expression, and she sighed.

"I was hoping not to resort to this, but..."

Hitsugaya watched her carefully and anticipated anything she might do. But she pulled out a white box with a blue stripe on the side.

"Here."

"What is it?"

"It's something I saw on the television."

"But what does it do?" Hitsugaya asked as he took the box, still wary of Sayuri.

"The commercial says it's supposed to help you grow. Good luck, Captain!"

She put her right hand to her forehead, and saluted, before running down the hall with a mischievous smile. Hitsugaya glanced down at the box, that read:

VIAGRA

"Natural male enhancement!" the box read. Hitsugaya blushed and dropped the box, his fist already clenched in rage and embarrassment.

"SAYURI!"

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Eeheehee!! I hope you liked it... More to come! Please review. Thank you for reading!