We're in the taxi heading towards our college. I start thinking about what it's going to be like. How are people going to see me? Will I and Sophie's friendship last? Then I erase all of my worries' and talk to Sophie she always seems to calm me.
"So do you think there will be any cut guys?" Sophie blushed and giggled at this.
"Do you think I would be going to college if there weren't going to be any?" I started laughing my butt off. It wasn't that funny. I guess it was nerves. After I stopped laughing it was deadly silent.
"We're here!" The taxi driver yelled. My throat tightened and I sat up straighter. Sophie was slowly reaching for the door handle and I felt like I was having an anxiety attack. She finally got out and I slid out of my seat quickly. Sophie paid the driver and he sped off like a speed demon. I turned and looked at my new school for who knows how long. I gasped loudly not even being embarrassed form how stupid I sounded. There was a tall black gate surrounding the campus. In front of me was a water fountain with a statue of a man holding a sword. Behind the fountain was a humongous building with pillars in the front. Around it were several smaller buildings. One that instantly caught my eye was the library. I slowly started walking toward until Sophie caught at my arm and said "We have to register first."
"How did you know?"
"I know you, Tessa", she said with a really serious face. I relaxed my shoulders and put my hand on her shoulder.
"Let's go register." I started walking in through the gates, Sophie behind me. We walk towards the big building. I'm looking around when, slam. I looked behind me and see Sophie sprawled on the floor next to this guy, who had I guess been looking around and bumped into Sophie. I go over and help Sophie, who had sat up, up onto her feet. I look over and see the guy on his feet with books in hand. He wasn't extremely tall but a normal size and he had a lot of muscle. He looked kind like a wall, like he wasn't all that interesting. He was definitely interested in something though. Or rather someone. He was staring at Sophie and Sophie was staring at him. They both had puppy dog eyes and looked like they were looking at a giant donut. Like they wanted what they saw. At first I thought it was really odd but then I felt a little jealous. I wanted someone to look at me that way. The want way not the donut way. I washed the jealousy away then because this was Sophie. She didn't have a perfect life and she was beautiful and sweet. She deserved to have someone look at her this way.
"So Soph how about you hang out and get registered with your new pal here and I'll meet up with you?" She looked at me with a pair of eyes that said, "Are you sure". I nodded a little and she got a huge grin on her face. So did her new friend. They shook each other's hand and he said," My names Gideon". After that I turned and walked away so that they could have some privacy. I walked out of their sight and sat on a bench. I took some deep breaths and tried to clear my head. I decided to go register and then go to the library.
I finished registering and grabbed a map. I walked out of the small building that was right behind the bench I was sitting at. I close the door behind me and looked down at the map I said that the library was south of here, on the edge of campus. I took another breath and started walking again. I started thinking about my mom and how proud she would be of me right now. How she would be tearing up and would throw a party for me when I got home. My mom was great. I only wish she hadn't had to leave me, dad, and Nate so soon. My father was a good man. No matter what people say I will always think my parents were fabulous people. They were good-hearted, intelligent, caring people. My hands were in fists and a tear was running down my cheek. I looked down at the map looking for the nearest bathroom.
I turned into the women's bathroom and ran into a stall. I flipped the seat down and started weeping into my hands. I cried until I felt dizzy and hopeless. Is it possible to feel this horrible? Even on such an amazing day? Is it possible to feel like your nothing? Like everything's made of paper and it's tearing into pieces of nothing? Like a storm is pouring down and lightning is striking inside your head? I took my hands away from my face and just sat there. I didn't think and I didn't move an inch. It's amazing how not thinking lifts all of this burden and all of your terrible memories off your shoulders. Like its water evaporating off of your soul. I sat up and wiped off my face with the back of my hands. I took a deep breath and opened the door to the stall. I walked out and went straight to the sink.
I looked up into the mirror and was now glad I hadn't worn makeup. My whole face was fire truck red, my eyes included. I grabbed a paper towel and put some cold water on it. I put it over my face for a few minutes and lifted it off my face. My face and eyes normal color had returned. My curly brunette hair had fallen down from its messy bun. I fixed my hair and then just stood there and looked at myself. I don't usually do this. I had always thought it was one of those book moments, but I now knew it was true. I looked at my gray eyes trying to find the person who was like my mother. I gave up and turned toward the exit and had to force myself to walk through, not wanting to leave my protective dome from real life.
After I walked out of the bathroom I just walked and walked not worrying about looking at the map. I found the library and walked through the doors and sucked in a deep breath. There were millions of shelves at least thirty feet tall. It was like walking into someone's brain and the shelves were full of memories. I let out my breath and started looking for a good book. I found one of my favorite books, "The Wide, Wide World", by Susan Warner. She somehow can relate a little to the main character Ellen. I go and find a blue bean bag in the far corner of the room. I flop down on the bag and open the book.
I was reading until someone said, "Interesting book is it?" I looked up and saw a pair of beautiful sky blue eyes.