`Hello?´, Jacob answered through heaving breaths like he ran to catch the phone. `Hi Jake. It´s Bella.´ Silence on the other side. It seemed like he even stopped breathing at all. `Jake? Can we talk?´ Still nothing was said at the other end of the phone but the breaths continued after a while. `Jake if you don´t want to talk to me and don´t want to meet me fine. But I need to talk to you and you are going to listen. I´m fed up with your attitude. We´ve been together for years and during the last months you seem like something is wrong. Jake what´s the matter? You can tell me. Please talk to me.´
As I thought he wouldn´t answer at all he did. `Bella nothing is wrong. I don´t know what you are talking about. Don´t be ridiculous. I´m just being busy. That´s all.´ In the background I could here shuffling and noises I couldn´t put my finger on. It sounded like something was grinding against something, namely Jake. Weird. But not as much as it would spark my interest.
`Jake. That´s enough. I didn´t want to do this through the phone but we haven´t seen each other in weeks and I can´t do this anymore. You are not interested in me like you should. You have better things to do all the time and during the last days I came to the conclusion that I simply don´t care anymore enough to make me angry. And that made me think. I should care more than I do. And ... and then I realized I can´t be with you anymore. I´m sorry....Jake?´
`Is that really what you are thinking? Ok I totally agree with you. You don´t love me anymore. I came to believe you never really did. Maybe you should go to Cullen and cry on his shoulder like you always do. I´m sure you two find something together to cope after your break ups.´ I gasped at this part. How could he? `But think about the last months one time. When did YOU have time for me? When weren´t you together with your precious best friend? When did you think about our relationship as you stood me up to be with him? I always waited for you to wake up and realize that I am your boyfriend and not him. And you know what? He did the same thing with his girlfriend. Tanya was devastated when he spent evening over evening rather with you than with her. And last night he even forgot their anniversary. Do you know by any chance where he was?´ His voice was full of fury and hate. How could he change in such a way without me noticing it. His words hurt. He talked to Tanya. And suddenly I knew what the background noises were. I couldn´t believe he cheated on me. He had the nerves accusing me of stealing her boyfriend, betraying him while he cheated on me. Oh no mister.
`You want to know where Edward was last night? He brought me soup as I lied sick in bed while my supposed to be boyfriend cheated on me with the town-bitch. He took care of me. I spent so much time with him because you bastard found another distraction. He would be a way better boyfriend than you ever were. And you know what? You are right. I do love him. Thank you for making this clear for me. So don´t you dare loading your shit on me. I don´t know you anymore Jacob. We are through. Get out of my life and don´t come back. And take this hooker with you.´ The last part I screamed before throwing the phone in the rough direction of the window. I was heaving hard trying to control my anger. I was so engrossed with my thoughts that it took me a while to notice that I didn´t hear the impact of the phone with the floor. I swirled around to find Edward standing in front of the window. His expression would be hilarious if I wouldn´t be so shocked. His mouth was wide open and his eyes were big with disbelief. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck...was all my brain was able to think. How did that happen. He wasn´t supposed to hear that conversation. I only realized myself that I was in love with him. I needed time to think that through. I froze on the spot. What now. Best strategy was waiting for him to react. So I stood there gawking his expression. But Edward still seemed to be in shock. Slowly I was growing worried. He didn´t even blink. What if he had a stroke or something. I couldn´t stand this any longer. I approached him and carefully laid my hand on his arm. `Edward? Are you ok? Come on let´s sit down on the bed. I´m sorry you heard that. I means nothing. Nothing has to change. Really. Forget what you heard... Edward. I mean it. I was so angry and Jacob cheated and I broke up with him and ...´ Wait. What? Had I heard him right? `W-What did you say?´ He couldn´t look me in the eyes. I was so afraid I lost our friendship. I couldn´t live without him. I began hyperventilating and a lonely tear rolled down my cheek. I tried to hide it from him so I turned my head to the window. A long time past where we just sat there and I drowned in horror scenarios how Edward would react once he overcame the shock. A finger suddenly crept under my chin and turned my head. Deep green pools stared into my broing brown ones. His other hand stretched forward and his finger caught another tear.
A small smile played around his lips as he whispered again. `Did you mean it?´ I couldn´t lie to him.`Yeah.´ I sighed and was about to stand up. Edward caught my wrist. One of his insanely perfect eyebrows was lifted. `Where do you think you are going? I have something to say to you.
I waited for months now. Bella you are my life. I broke up with Tanya. I couldn´t bear it anymore. I was with her because I thought she would distract me from you. You see how that ended. I don´t want to be away from you any longer. I can´t stand a world were we are not together. I don´t want to be your friend. I want to be so much more for you. I couldn´t believe what I heard you say on the phone. I was euphoric. But the same time I was afraid that you only said that to hurt Jacob. I couldn´t take it if you only were upset. But I never want to forget what you said. I need you.... I love you.´
The last part was only a whisper. He looked so vulnerable. For the first time I knew what the look in his eyes for the last months meant. He looked at me with hope, fear and ..love.
`Edward. Everything I said was true. I want to be with you. Only you.´ With this said his smile grew into a blinding grin and his arms were suddenly around me in a bone crushing hug.
This night I had the best sleep since a long time. Edward stayed and stroked my hair the whole night. I was snuggled into is chest smiling and occasionelly felt his lips brushing my forhead. The knot in my stomach had vanished.