Yay for writing chapters!

Lame, yes... but so are most of the things that make me smile. Don't hate.

This is purely for fun, no infringement intended, and so on and so forth.

Enjoy!

"Jacob Black, you have no idea how to dance, do you?"

Jake started and spun around, the remote he held a moment before clattering to the floor. "What? No! I mean, uh- yes…I mean, what?"

"Eloquent, Black, that's what you are."

"Shut up Leah." He muttered under his breath, stooping down to retrieve the remote. He resisted the urge to fling it at her, but barely.

"Make me." She smirked, reaching out and snatching the control out of his hand.

None too gently he yanked the remote back from her, crossing his arms and hiding it under his armpit. He scowled at her sullenly. Of course he had no idea how to dance, but there was no way he was going to tell Leah Clearwater that. He preferred not to tell her anything at all, conversation with that girl was something he tried to avoid at all costs. There are some things a guy just doesn't forgive…and especially doesn't forget. "Didn't you just get your license? Why don't you go drive around or something and leave me alone."

"Having a license doesn't mean I have a car, dimwit. I'm stuck here with your sunshine-y self while our Dads gut those fish they caught with Charlie this morning. Lucky you, I know."

"Yeah, that's just what I was thinking." He said, collapsing onto his couch.

"Soo…" She dropped down onto the faded piece of furniture beside him. "Did you want me to teach you?"

He gave her a sidelong glance. "Teach me what?"

She punched his shoulder, and it hurt a little more than he would care to admit. "You know, how to dance!"

"Wh-why? Why would you think I would need to learn how to dance?" He might be turning a slight shade of red. Maybe.

"Umm, why else would you be standing here alone in front of the television, swaying your bony hips awkwardly to MTV with a very concentrated look on your face? Plus, I know the middle school Valentines dance is next week, doesn't take a genius to put two and two together. Women's intuition and all you know."

He crossed his arms over his chest (again) and avoided eye contact, staring intensely at the people on television still bumping and grinding before them. The ways in which they were contorting their bodies were totally foreign and more than a little intimidating. He was fairly certain girls on the rez wouldn't want to do…the things these girls were doing. Would they? He dropped his chin to his chest awkwardly. "How did you know about the Valentines dance?"

"Embry came over to borrow one of my Dad's ties a few days ago. I may or may not have given him a few pointers on how to woo a certain female into accompanying him…"

This caught his attention. "I knew it! I knew that something had to be up, there is no way Paige Hughes would have agreed to go to the dance with him if he hadn't pulled something over on her. What did you do, sneak him a bottle …I dunno, chloroform or something?"

"Chloroform? Dear God Black, he wants to dance with her, not knock her out and sneak her into the back of his child-molester van. Or at least I hope not. But regardless, wow, you really are hopeless…hence the reason no girl in her right mind will dance with you."

"Hey, girls dance with me." He mumbled.

"Really? Who, and when? I need names."

"Okay, okay, you've made your point, now go away." He grabbed a pillow from behind his back and placed it beside him, trying to block her out of his line of sight. It lasted about two seconds before she reached out and flung it behind the couch.

"What, and leave you stuck here all by your lonesome trying to learn the Macarena from TRL? Now, what kind of a friend would I be if I did that?"

Jacob's face wrinkled in confusion. "Friend? In what twisted universe are we friends?"

"The one where I am bored out of my mind. Humor me, it's for your own good." Jumping up, she grabbed his hand and hauled the thirteen year old to his (two left) feet. She snatched away the remote and flung it over the back of the couch. "Okay, you're going to see a lot of the other little thirteen year old misfits doing the whole 'hands around the neck, hands on the waist, swaying back and forth' kind of jazz, but that's stupid and you will not be doing any such thing. Understand?"

Jake only stared at her through narrowed eyes, his jaw clenched tightly. He would never, ever admit it of course, but there was still a part of him that was absolutely terrified of Leah Clearwater. And it wasn't exactly a small part either. Oh, she had gotten a lot more tolerable since she started dating Sam Uley, Seth and him figured all that sappy stuff, happiness and love and the like must be eating away at her usual sinister persona. But still, even now a guy would have to be an absolute fool to trust her. Jake wondered if she had used some of that chloroform (she had to have it) on Sam. There was no way he was going to let her make a fool of him, and he stayed right where he was.

"Oooookay, so I guess we are going to be doing things the hard way. Give me your hands."

Still, he didn't move. She rolled her eyes.

"Jacob, come on don't be stupid. Now I know that might be difficult for you, but just try would you? I don't have cooties for Pete's sake, I thought being a teenager now you wouldn't be so afraid of girls anymore. I mean, we've kissed before, what's a little dancing after that?"

His eyes grew wide and he looked around the empty room nervously. If anyone besides his sisters ever got an earful of that story he would be totally in for it. He couldn't imagine the crap the guys would give him for kissing a girl like Leah…or really, any girl for that matter. "Shh, don't talk about that would you? Somebody might hear you!"

Gasping, Leah clutched her chest. "What was I thinking?! God forbid anyone hear about our torrid affair! I mean, what would the neighbors think?"

"Ha, ha, ha. So funny I forgot to laugh."

"Oh grow up Jake! If you think that little peck was an actual kiss, then I feel infinitely sorry for whatever girl you actually try to lay one on. But come on, if you let me teach you a few moves, you might actually get a chance at a real smooch on a girl you don't completely despise."

"No."

"Ja-cob Black!

"Le-ah Clearwater!" He mocked her, hands on his hips and everything.

"I swear, you're still such a girl! Give me your damn hands would you!" Reaching out, she grabbed him by the wrists with both of her hands and pulled him roughly towards her. Probably bit too roughly though, on second thought. They collided with a thud, and she stumbled back under the weight of him. Reaching out to steady herself, she grabbed two fistfuls of his tee-shirt and held on for dear life. He was teetering from the impact too though, and his added weight and unstability only sent her crashing backwards onto the couch- with Jake landing fully on top of her. Despite the fact that she was almost three years older than him, he was still a good bit bigger and his body covered hers almost entirely. He may or not have stopped breathing for a moment or two. Shut up.

"Leah, Sam's here to pick you up!" Harry voice echoed back from the front of the house.

"Get off of me you idiot!" She wheezed, shoving at his shoulders and squirming underneath him uncomfortably.

All that squirming wasn't helping the situation, not one bit.

"Umm…okay." He mumbled, his face as hot and bright as a cherry-red coal. He jumped up off of the older girl and ran back to his room as fast as he could, with Leah making a frantic break for the cab of her boyfriend's new truck.

She never tried to dance with him again.

That day, Jacob gave Leah a bruised ribcage, and she gave him…well, it wouldn't be quite appropriate to discuss that sort of thing here.

I like writing a happy Leah...I hope she didn't seem OOC!

PS, new kitty needs a name, any suggestions that aren't common or people names?