12:48 PM - Stark Tower
Pepper felt sick, and she was pretty sure that it had nothing to do with the unplanned baby growing inside her womb. Ok, well maybe a little bit of it was the surprise pregnancy, but mostly it was the fact that she would have to split her time not only dealing with her boyfriend, but now with an entire host of people, including one who was bent on revenge. Who in their right mind agreed to this? She understood the contract that Tony had signed, getting JARVIS to procure her a copy (without anyone's knowledge or permission), but why in the world he would actually agree to house them in their new home was beyond her.
The meeting had ended only a few minutes ago, after all of the details had been taken care of (at least for the most part), and Tony had promptly called her to fill her in on the details (careful to avoid the topic of their last call). At first she thought that it was a bad joke taken too far, but after a quick exchange with Bruce, she realized that she was about to become a mother of six and a half. Scratch that figure, she forgot to include Loki, who made seven and a half. She wasn't even sure how she had felt about one real baby, her's or not, and now she was in charge of at least three questionably competent adults! Loki's capacity for understanding the modern world (or the world itself in Tony's case), was still a mystery to the redhead, as she had only gathered a small glimpse at him and his attitude from the Avengers.
She loved Tony, but there were times (more often in a day than could be counted by a human) that she wished that there was no Iron Man...
1:37 PM (human time) - Asgard, A Few Days Ago
Locked in solitary confinement, Loki had probably seen more visitors in a week than most normal criminals did in a month. True, it was really only Queen Frigga that had come by to see him, but it seemed as if she had returned before she had even left. The emerald-eyed one found it hard to concentrate as her sentimental words jarred his ears, passing through one side of his head and out the other, blown by the wind for all he cared. Were she not blinded by the lies of her husband, he might have considered listening to her, but as such, he did all that he could drown out her insufferable droning about ridiculous ideals such as 'love' and 'family'.
Mother. A part of Loki lingered still, buried deep within the malice and contempt, that still yearned for the love of his family, that cared about them, but he had been so spurned by the people that said that they would always love him, no matter what, he had lost all hope of reconciliation. No matter what horrors the Other had promised him, Loki knew deep down that he was already suffering the worst fate that could be placed upon him, not that he wasn't afraid of retribution.
In time, however, he had succeeded in his mediation and reached the place he had been trying to get to - the designated meeting place where he could confer with The Other. He knew that he had messed up in the worst of ways, but being a master manipulator (unfortunately thanks to a certain Avenger ((now known to him as the "mewling quim")), he was unable to call himself the master), fairly certain that he could make a bargain that could save his skin and still offer plenty of reward.
The tiny tyrant stood amongst the rocks, waiting to see his cohort, but instead of the intimidating figure cut out by the Other, Loki saw an unfamiliar shape forming before his eyes. Stepping forward from behind a natural stone pillar, figure becoming closer but no more defined, he gazed at the cloaked silhouette, waiting for it to make the first move - an agreement would be harder to reach if he had acted hostilely.
"I'm afraid that I can't allow you to leave this place just yet," The voice was feminine, and it sounded morose, yet for all that Loki could see of the figure, it might as well have been anything, or anyone, "When you wake, you shall find yourself on earth, in the care of those that have ruined you."
Narrowing his eyes suspiciously, Loki sneered, "Liar! You have no such power over me, nor knowledge of - "
Shaking its hooded head, a fist in a worn leather glove lashed forward with the force of a speeding truck, striking him right in the nose. He went flying back, unconscious, "I tried to warn you."
2:55 PM - Stark Mansion, The Present
Gathered outside a house that could rival both the White House and the Lincoln Memorial combined, half the walls made of indestructible window, the Avenger's were handed a book - not a booklet - on the rules and a complete instruction on the uses of JARVIS (and other devices). Given only two hours to work, Pepper and JARVIS had combined their powers to create a rough draft of everything that they felt important for their guests to know. Most of it was done by JARVIS, with a fair amount of input by Tony himself.
"I know that we have a couple of days until our final gue-"
Pepper was cut off by Tony, "You don't have to mince words, Pepp. You can just call him what he is: A psychotic diva with daddy issues, no offense big guy."
Too busy reading the book (from end to beginning), Thor didn't hear Tony, which was probably for the best.
However, Clint did hear him, "Do you even hear yourself sometimes?"
"You mean if he's not too busy looking at himself?" Steve snorted, not helping the situation at all.
"Tony isn't a complete psycho," Natasha surprisingly came to his defense, "yet. Keep yourself any more contained in the lab, and it might just happen one day."
Tony and Pepper looked at each other, silently exchanging a 'what do I/you do to piss her off?'.
Also a lab-shut in, Bruce was slightly offended by the remark, even though he knew that it wasn't directed at him, "Thanks."
"You know that I don't mean you." She smiled at him, and out of the corner of his eye, Tony could have sworn that he saw Clint look away, scowling to himself.
Sighing, Pepper decided to at least try to get this tour back on track, "Loki will be arriving tomorrow, but I would like it if we could aquatint ourselves with the rules first."
"Woman of Stark's, I thank you for your generous hospitality," The God of Thunder took her hands, beaming earnestly, "and may the Goddess of Fertility bless your child with his father's intelligence and your charm."
"Oh, no." Tony closed his eyes, pinching the corners together, alarm in his tone.
She rounded in on Tony, "You told them?"
Taken aback, thinking that she was going to berate Thor for his unfortunate choice of words, Tony felt himself shrinking before the compact redhead, "I told Bruce."
Glaring at Bruce, he pointed at Natasha, "I told her."
"He told me in passing, because I saw Stark huddled in a corner pulling his hair out," She explained calmly, "And when I expressed something relating to the matter to the doctor, Clint overheard."
Clint shrugged, not the only one to accidentally overhear Natasha and Bruce, "I think Coulson also heard the news."
Still seething, but unable to pin the blame on any one person, Pepper turned her attention back to Tony, "You and I are going to talk later."
2:59 PM - The Outskirts of New York, New York
Glancing up from a map of New York City, a figure in a long black trench coat with worn leather gloves closed the map, a smile on underneath the upturned collar of the jacket, "I'm coming for you Tony. I hope you're ready for me this time."
3:15 PM - Main Living Area # 1
Tour of all the accessible parts of the mansion over with, Pepper had sat everyone down in her favorite living room, which the original blueprints of the house had designated "Main living area # 1 (out of three main, five secondary, two garages, one gym, an indoor pool, four offices, 12 bathrooms, 15 bedrooms ((eight of them masters)), and an entire floor that was strictly for lab use)". Out of all the rooms, it was probably the homiest, the walls still lined with the crayons of a two year old, the faint sent of spilled engine oil staining the floor. This was the only room that spoke of a family, old family pictures still lining the mantlepiece and decorative tables. This room made her think of Tony, of all the good that he has accomplished and will accomplish.
But she was still mad at him.
"This is where you grew up?" Steve asked, admiring the photos of Howard and his family, "When I knew Howard, the last thing on his mind was family."
At once he had regretted his words, seeing the hurt look of hurt on Miss Potts face.
"I didn't mean it like that! I..."
"Just stop talking." Natasha advised.
"Right." He frowned, looking back at the photos so that he couldn't cause any more damage.
Coming on over the intercom, JARVIS introduced himself to the team, "I am JARVIS-"
"Just save it JARV," Tony snapped at the AI, angry at the situation.
Hearing the voice from nowhere, Thor jumped, hammer magically in his hand, ready to defend himself and his allies, "Who goes there?"
Pepper rolled her eyes, "That was JARVIS. He runs the house."
Reminded suddenly of why they had all arrived at his trillion dollar home, Tony pointed at the television set, "No one not born in this century may operate any of the electric devices without proper supervision, do you understand?"
It was actually Rule number one.
The House Rules:
1: No one individual born before the year 1950 is allowed to operate any electric device; The television set, the telephone, the microwave, the oven, etc, etc.
2: No weapons may be deployed in the house for any reason other than self-defense.
3: No use of superpowers (unless approved by Pepper).
4: Clean up after yourself.
5: Respect each other.
6: Respect each other's stuff.
7: Ask permission before you leave the premises.
8: Consider one another's interests.
9: When we have work to do, we do it without complaining (This especially applies to Tony).
10: No pets.
Rule-breaking will be dealt with accordingly.
Wow, not such a bad turn out so far! Thanks you guys! Alright, so the next chapter won't be so serious, and I don't expect it to be long like the last two either, but who knows? And for those of you who haven't seen the movie *spoiler alert* Coulson isn't dead in my version. *end* I strongly disagreed with that scene, though I do see the point of it, and in all fairness, they did it in the best possible way, but still, I refuse to accept it! Oh well. Before I forget, don't call anyone a mewling quim, it's not very nice. Ok, so if there are any questions, comments, concerns with my writing (such as characterization), or requests, please, leave a review and let me know!