AN: mentions of self-harm

Nico slept terribly that night. He was so tired but he just couldn't seem to be able to fall asleep. He'd had terrible insomnia since Bianca died. Anything could happen if he closed his eyes. Anything. Maybe he was just being paranoid but he couldn't help it. He was finally able to fall asleep at 1:30 AM, when he could no longer force his eyes open.

He woke to Percy shaking his arm, "Hey Neeks. You should get up. The bus leaves in half an hour."

"Neeks?"

"Yup." He ducked out of the room. "Hurry up."

Nico stared at where Percy had been in awe. He pulled back the covers and hopped out of bed. He didn't have a lot of clothes in the trash bag of his but the clothes he did have were black. He'd found that black was the best color for his situation. Blend in with the shadows and try not to attract attention. That was the last thing he needed. He pulled off the only pair of pajamas he owned and replaced the black fleece with a skull t-shirt and a pair of black jeans. He lifted his aviator jacket. The last thing Bianca had given him. It had been too big on him at first but he'd grown into it. He placed his headphones around his neck and looked in the body length mirror hung on the oak door or the guest bedroom.

He rubbed at the dark circles around his eyes and frowned. Sighing, he grabbed a small black backpack out of his trash bag. If he could fit all of his stuff in that backpack he would, but unfortunately it was too small. He slung the bag over his shoulder and grabbed the extra picture of Bianca and him. It was small and worn but it was his charm. He brought it everywhere with him. A while back he made several copies at the library just in case something were to happen to the one he carried with him. carefully, he slipped the photo into pocket.

"C'mon Neeks. The bus will be here soon." He heard Percy's voice outside the door.

"I'm coming." He opened the door and frowned at the boy smiling at him from mere inches away.

He couldn't help but study his new foster brother. The beautiful blue eyes, cute smile. Nico shunned the thoughts, banished them to the back of his mind. It was wrong. He told himself. It was wrong to feel that way about a boy. He looked away in shame.

"You coming?" Percy asked and grabbed him by the elbow. "I can't miss the bus again."

"Yeah." He grabbed his cell and closed his door behind him. "I'm right behind you." He slipped on his beat-up shoes at the entrance. A few months ago he'd duck taped the sole back onto the rest of the shoe but the tape was about to be worn completely through. There was a hole in the top of his shoe too but that didn't matter too much.

"You need new shoes." Percy commented.

Nico scowled at Percy's brand new sneakers. "No kidding."

"Don't your other families buy you new shoes."

Nico snorted but said nothing. Instead he tied the laces and followed Percy out the door to the bus stop.

"I want to introduce you to my friends." Percy said. "I'm sure you'll like them. I have a girlfriend. Her name's Annabeth. Smartest girl in the entire school." He laughed. "Don't know why she would ever fall for me. I'm failing most of my classes."

There was a pang in Nico's heart when he heard "girlfriend" of course Percy would have a girlfriend. He looked at the frozen ground grimly. Percy wasn't a freak, not like him. He leaned against the sign at the bus stop and put his headphones on. This was the worst part. No matter how much he distanced himself, it still hurt having no friends. He didn't know why this place would be any different at all. He didn't want to be hurt by anyone and the best way to assure that is to make sure he never got to know anyone. That way it would be so much easier to leave. He had a motto: Don't get attached. Don't say goodbye. It was a lonely life but it was his life.

The rickety bus pulled up to the sidewalk and kids began to file on. Percy made a beeline for a girl with curly blond hair pulled back in a ponytail. He kissed her on the lips gently and sat next to her with his arm pulled around her back. Nico winced and sat beside the first empty seat in the front of the bus. He'd found that usually the youngest kids sat in the front and he was a freshman.

The bus was loud but Nico drowned it out with his music. Loud music. Anything to numb himself and block out the world. The bus pulled to a stop in front of the enormous campus of Goode High. He was the first one off the bus and headed straight for advisory. He didn't bother with lockers unless it was against the rules to carry your backpack around. Locker combinations weren't particularly tricky to learn, but it was a hassle when you moved every few months.

He pulled his headphones back around his neck and wandered into homeroom. The teacher was a tall graying man who slumped over his computer. There was an incredibly bright kid talking to him. The kid had shaggy blond hair that practically glowed in the fluorescent lights.

The teacher saw Nico approach and beckoned him over, "And here he is now. Nico di Angelo, William is going to be showing you around for the next few weeks. We always pair up new kids with a guide that will have all of their classes to make the transition to Goode High easier."

The boy smiled at Nico. "It's just Will."

Nico was having a hard time forming his thoughts. He was cute. Nico pushed the thoughts away. Stop thinking like a freak. He told himself. He nodded at Will. "We have all of the same classes."

"Yeah." Will grinned. "That's going to be fun."

Nico squinted. he couldn't tell if Will was being sarcastic.

"You have an accent." Will commented.

"I was born in Italy."

"That's so cool." Will grinned at him.

Nico shrugged and looked over at the teacher, "Where do I sit."

The teacher lowered his glasses and pointed to a seat on the end of the classroom. "By Will."

Great. What did he do to deserve this? "Thanks." He hung his backpack around the back of the chair. He quickly felt for Bianca's picture in his pocket. It was still there. At that moment Percy walked in, flanked by a crowd of people. "God save me." He muttered in fluent Italian.

Percy lit up like a Christmas tree the second he saw Nico sulking in the corner of the room. "Neeks!" He rushed over to him, and all at once Nico was surrounded by strangers.

Will gave him a surprised look. "You know Percy?" He muttered.

"He's my foster brother."

Will's eyebrows shot upward. "Well he's the most popular boy in the entire school."

Nico groaned and muttered a string of curses in Italian.

Percy leaned against his desk. "This is my girlfriend Annabeth." He pointed to the curly haired blonde from the bus. "My bro Jason and his girlfriend Piper. This is Leo and his girlfriend Calypso. And this is Reyna."

"Fantastic." Nico glanced warily at the group and then looked over at Will who was snickering into his sleeve.

Leo squinted at him. "Hey! I totally know you! You're Hazel's half-brother! She has a picture of you in her bedroom."

"You know Hazel?" Percy and Nico said in unison.

"Yeah. Before I moved here she was my neighbor. We still keep in touch."

Nico raised his eyebrows. "Cool." What a coincidence. This was not going to be good in the long run.

The first bell rang and Percy's friends said their goodbyes. They walked out the door laughing and chatting about things Nico didn't understand, another reminder that he just didn't belong. Will smiled at him and slipped into his own seat. He was like a humanized ray of sunshine and it was starting to get on Nico's nerves.

Will scooted closer and leaned in. "Say something in Italian."

What was he? Will's personal google translator. "Fuck off." He said in Italian.

"Cool what did that mean?"

"Sunshine and unicorns." Nico said sarcastically.

Will didn't seem to understand sarcasm. "Nice! I can only speak English. This is my second year of Spanish and I can only say No hablo espanol. Which I'm pretty sure means that I can't speak Spanish."

He honestly couldn't care less. He was going to leave sooner or later. Don't get attached. It was the number one rule and always the hardest to follow. The loneliness ate away at him. It hurt, a lot. But heartbreak hurt worse. He'd rather have the loneliness then run the risk of getting his heart broken because he had to move yet again. He supposed that he did have Hazel. That was something. But it just wasn't enough. He talked to his counselor Mr. Henry too, but it wasn't the same. He and Mr. Henry weren't friends. He was being paid to talk to him. He almost laughed. The government had to pay someone to talk to him.

Nico was pretty sure he knew what was on his file. He was fourteen, so everything he told his counselor was confidential. Mr. Blofis and Mrs. Jackson probably knew about his depression, but probably not to what extent. And he probably wouldn't be with them when summer came around and he continued to wear long sleeves. A bubble of shame rose to his chest but he shoved it down.

"You want to sit with me at lunch?" Will asked.

Nico shrugged. "No."

Will's face fell and he turned so that he faced the front of the class. "Oh."

Nico felt a bit bad, but he just . . . he just couldn't. Afford. To get. Attached.