Adjusting

I sat cowered over my bed in my new 'room'. God, I didn't know which was better, Being trapped in that box forever, or simply staying here. I just couldn't believe or even comprehend the news I had received much, much earlier this week, and it was still eating at my soul...

I had missed it.

The war...

Everything was so crystal clear now. So close but far too far away to grab.

11 told me most of the details, although she herself hadn't been around either, but she had a reason! She hadn't been given a soul at that time. I'd ask her how she got her soul, but I'm still trying to stitch everything else together.

But from what I heard from 11, Humans used to walk the world, then an event led to robots overthrowing them and killing them all. Then one of them, the scientist as everyone calls him, created us. He gave us parts of his soul to live and destroy the 'beasts' that his earlier creation had built. I'm not certain but I think they got rid of it and most of the beasts but still, It's a large world out there... You can never be too sure...

...That's all I gathered anyway. But I just couldn't believe it! I was built to help fight against the beasts and what happened? I got trapped in a box!

Ohhh, I'm never going to be able to get rid of this... feeling... I still can't get my head around what it is... anger? Sadness?

This isn't helping... The fact that the others seem to have a mission to make sure I keep this weight of feeling saddled to my shoulders seems to be very clear. Well, only a few of them anyway... I guess...

I don't think I know everyone well enough to judge them right away, but still... I've only known them for a few hours and yet I've already got a few interpretations about them...

1, from what I learnt and saw, he's a little bit of a coward... I've only seen him once but for that hour, he never smiled, or said anything very uplifting at all for that matter. He looked at me with darkly narrowed eyes of suspicion and faced 11 with the question, 'what's this?'... Not the greatest first impression I'll admit but maybe he's just protective of the others? He's said to have been the leader... I'm not sure, but still, I guess only time will tell if he is all nasty... I guess... If he doesn't kill me first... I doubt some of the others will let him...

Like 7, she's very rebellious against 1 from what I understand, coming from 11. All I really know about her is that she's a strong and rather warrior like stitchpunk who I think has a soft spot for 9, although I'm not sure since I only saw her for a bit and the most we actually said to each other was 'hi' and introduced our numbers.

Oh, speaking of 9, I had better just say, 11 doesn't like him much. To be fully honest I'm not sure why, but I guess she has her reasons... But he seemed very welcoming when I met him. He was with 7, and he greeted me kindly and bid me goodbye when the two left. Something that not everyone else did...

Well, I don't blame 3 and 4 for not saying anything, as far as I know, they're mute and only communicate though flashing bright eyes. The minuet the saw me they rushed over and started pulling me about, fiddling with me head feathers and rummaging through my bag. I'll admit it felt... awkward... Even when 11 said "Don't worry, there just 'cataloguing'..." well, whatever 'cataloguing' is, it seems like a very weird and awkward thing that I don't wish to experience again. But that a side, the twins seem kind enough and they didn't seem to mind me as much.

Neither did 5 for that matter. Now, I'm not certain about this, but I THINK 11 and 5 are together in that kinda 'relationship' way, you know, sorta like 9 and 7... I think... Anyways, he's rather awkward in some ways, in a good way I'll point out. He was rather jumpy when I met him, although not as jumpy as I was when 6 leapt out at me, but that's for in a bit, but from what I know, 5's sort of like the healer, and very good at heart.

...As I said before, 6 scared me at first, I didn't notice him in the corner of the room, and I NEVER saw or heard him coming towards me, so I literally jumped onto 11's head, much to her dismay. I didn't mean it I swear! It was just so... sudden! But after the misunderstanding was cleared, I quickly grew fond of him, why? 'Cus he likes drawing! I think his drawing's are really great too, though, there mostly the same thing drawn over and over again, and as I left, I'm pretty sure I heard him mumbling 'source' or something close to that. I WAS going to question 11 on this, though; something's are better left alone right?

Like 8! ...Okay, maybe that was a little too harsh, but... I'll be honest; he scares me half to death! And that's only coming to size... I wouldn't know where to begin with personality. Well, it would be mean to leave him out so, here goes nothing.

8 is...

He's...

He's kinda...

...He's a jerk. I can't put it any other way. I've only known him like ten minutes and he was already pushing everybody about, except 1 that is... The poor lug would kiss his feet if asked; he's that loyal to him... I guess that's a good thing, but it's very downplayed when you're giving loyalty to ONE person alone and treating everyone else like-

I'm being too harsh here, I can tell. I haven't known him that long.

Maybe he's not all bad?

But that's what I say about everyone right?

Well, not everyone because I'm mostly scared of everyone!

But they don't seem bad.

But I haven't known them that long!

But I can't judge on first impressions!

Yes I can!

No I can't!

Yes I can!

No I can't!

No I can!

No, wait I meant- GAH!

With a yell of frustration I threw the top half of body onto the sponge which provided as a bed for me in the little corner that acted as 'my room'.

I let my arms hang loosely over the edge, not really caring at this point of my mental break down. For as long as I've been up here, I've been mourning over the loss of all of the joy I was actually able to hold onto during my transition into madness after many years trapped. What was the point now? Here was a group of stitchpunk's who had so greatly saved what remained of the world whilst I wasted time trapped in a box.

What was the point being here now? What-?

I stopped. My mind and mechanics stopped as my hearing perked as best as possible.

Footsteps, enclosing, slowly.

Someone was coming!

With a gasp I crawled up onto the yellow, squishy sponge and scrabbled into the corner of the room, my knees cuddled against my chest as I watched the door, not daring to blink in case I missed whoever was coming, my heart skipped far too many beats during that painfully slow time. Whoever was coming wasn't all that fast, as I could hear, and that relaxed me in some ways, but I felt far safer when I finally saw who had come.

"Are you okay, child? I heard you shout..." I didn't know 2 too well, but there was a kind of softness about the stitchpunk that was unexplainable, in a good way though. No, a smashing way to be corrected.

I simply nodded, unable to smile or frown at this point, as I didn't know WHAT to feel to be completely honest, "I-I'm fine, t-t-two..." He frowned slightly, walking deeper into the room.

"Please don't take this the wrong way, but don't entirely look it..." He sat on the edge of my bed, his upper torso turned so he could look at me with a gentle look of concern. It was rather... Uplifting... Was that the joy returning to my soul?

"0... If something is wrong, you can tell me... I don't want to pressure you in any way as you're still... adjusting to all of this-" He gestured a hand around the room before turning back to me- " But just, know, You're still a part of this clan, no matter what." He smiled genuinely, slowly turning himself to me fully, crossing his legs and resting his elbows on his ankles. I couldn't help but smile back.

"T-Thank you... T-Two..." He smiled.

"Me and everyone else will always be here to help you, child." I may have a problem with my arms as they seemed to drag me forward and wrap themselves around 2 in a gentle embrace. I always seemed to hand out these little surprise hugs whenever I was so happy about something and it felt great, it seriously did.

At first he seemed a bit stunned, and I don't blame him, but he quickly embraced me back, much to my surprised.

The hug lasted quite a little while before he pulled away. This new feeling... sorrow? Sadness? It was faint but, I could feel it... How odd...

He smiled genuinely, his cheeks ever so slightly green. Was that... a blush...?

My cheeks were burning to, I wanted to turn away, but that would be rude wouldn't it?

"Well, if you have any trouble... Just say... Don't be afraid..." He got up and made his way to the door.

I smiled. "I-I'll try... Thanks...T-Two..."

I just remembered his smile as he left; the warmth of his sweet little smile seemed to heat up the entire room.

I sighed, lying down on the bed. A new feeling... I couldn't explain... But it had washed away the last one... Guilt... My guilt had been suppressed by this sudden feeling. What could it be described as?

I don't know. I don't know a lot of things but, you know what? That's okay... I can talk to them about it...

The final feeling. 6 had given me a piece of chalk as a sort of welcome gift, as well as a few pieces of paper. I scribbled away until I fell asleep in the candle light, my head rolled back over my 'pillow' as my hands gently gripped the drawing.

I peacefully slipped into my dreams, now suddenly free of shadows...

A dream is what you want it to be...

I want a memory...

There are still answers I need explained to me...

Show me...

Tell me...

Please...

I beg you...