It was good to have something to take my mind off the last few months. I've struggled more than I did before, socially anyway. After reading his letter, I'm even more on edge lately. I see him with Lavi, and I'm confused as to why the hell he thought he needed to write down this shit. I don't understand. He can't just expect me, of all people, to accept this and do nothing with it. I'd confront him if I could, but as much as I hate to admit it, I need to rest. I guess I'll do it anyway.
Allen,
I'm burned out like a bright light, I wasn't ready for this.
I never gave up, you dumb ass. I just knew there was nothing I could have said to save us. So why try. The truth hurts, but its still always there. It's reality. We know it better than any one else. You and I. Its impossible to just stay friends when we still have feelings like this. Everyone saw it. The constant fighting, if you want to blame me fine, I think I can take that. But what I can't accept is the feeling alone shit you talked about. You got together with him so quickly. Like we meant nothing.
And when they start to ask questions I'll make sure to be clear.
I don't know how you can say that and feel OK with yourself. It's not like I didn't want to try. I was scared too. But now, none of that matters.
When you see my friends tell them hi for me.
Tell them what you think about the way you handled everything.
You turned and all you left me with was this broken key.
So tell me what you think.
You're the one that wrote me off. Don't forget that. We were still on a break. You should have given us more time. You said you wanted to be happy again. So leaving me make you happy? Fine. I'm glad you feel that way. You meant so much to me, and when things got really messed up you ran. You're such a child.
You gave me the time of my life and cut like a knife to the bone.
I won't say anything else. I loved you. I can leave well enough alone though. You're wrong. We could have made it. I wasn't the one who gave up, you were. Don't place the blame on anything but fear. You didn't have to tell me anything. Let's leave it at that next time.
So do your best for me
-Kanda.