"So, how's Gippal?"

Rikku winced. Trust Paine to hit on a sensitive issue.

"I don't really know," she replied sheepishly. "I haven't been to Djose in almost a month. Last time I was there he seemed a little irritated with me. I mean, he practically kicked me out of his bedroom. So I just started...avoiding him, I guess."

"You were in his bedroom?"

Rikku had no idea why Paine sounded so incredulous. "Yeah. We're best friends. We used to have sleepovers all the time. Although, he hogs the covers a lot more now than he used-"

"You were in his bed?" Yuna's fork paused midway to her mouth, which hung open far enough to expose her rear molars for everyone's viewing pleasure.

"He's like a brother, okay?" Irritated, Rikku folded her arms over her chest. Yuna cringed, and she and Paine exchanged looks. Finally, Paine broke the tense silence.

"Look, Rikku, I know you're not exactly fast on the uptake-" she talked right over Rikku's offended snort "-but Gippal's got a thing for you."

"A thing?" Rikku's voice rose in shock, and her quick backwards movement nearly upended her water glass.

"Yeah, you know. A crush. An infatuation. A passion."

That did it. Brilliant color flooded her cheeks. She was going to die of embarrassment. This was it, the end. How come no one had ever told her that humiliation was lethal? "I know what a crush is, you jerk. He doesn't have one on me."

"We're pretty sure he does," Yuna said regretfully. "We all thought you'd figure it out one day, but wow. I mean, poor Gippal. Finding you in his bed must've been like a dream come true. I'm surprised he didn't just jump you then and-"

"Shut it," Rikku shrieked, slapping her hands against her burning cheeks. "You're wrong. Gippal's got plenty of girls. What would he want with me?"

"Beats me," Paine said, earning a glare from across the table, "but the man pines for you. It's a little sad, actually. But if I know Gippal, and I do, he's definitely got a thing for you."

"I've known Gippal longer than you have," Rikku snapped. "Don't you think I'd know if my best friend had a crush on me?"

"I don't know," Paine taunted. "Would you?"

"I would!" Rikku slapped her palm down on the table.

"Why don't you go ask him, then? Then we'd all know for sure, wouldn't we."

To Rikku, it was the perfect solution. Gippal would laugh it off, and then Paine would see that Rikku really did know Gippal better than anyone else. She threw down some bills, and fluttered her fingers at Paine and Yuna as she dashed off down the beach, towards her airship.

"Was that wise?" Yuna asked as she watched Rikku's retreating figure. Paine shrugged.

"I guess we'll find out, won't we."

- -

"Paine said what?" Gippal choked.

"I know. I told her she was wrong, but she said I should come and ask you so she'd know for certain. Crazy, huh?" Rikku collapsed into a chair, more than a little relieved.

"Damn." Gippal threw his greasy rag on the floor of the workshop, wiping his dirty hands on his pants. "When is that girl going to learn to keep her big mouth shut? If she were a man, I'd have kicked her ass all the way to Bevelle by now." He bent over, hands on his knees, grappling desperately for an excuse. "Sonuvabitch."

Rikku blinked. "Huh?" Unsteadily, she stood up. "It's not true. Is it? It can't be true."

"Ah, hell." He turned away from her. Something in the way she was wringing her fingers disturbed him. It was a timid, uncertain gesture. Rikku was never timid or uncertain. "I didn't think you'd find out." At least, not like this.

"But I thought..." her voice wavered. "I mean…we were best friends."

"Yeah, we were." He couldn't keep the bitterness from his voice. Because, like it or not, things were going to change. They'd never get back the casual friendship they'd once shared, and already he missed it.

"You never said anything." She made it sound as though he should have.

"What should I have said?" He slammed his fist against a wall in irritation, and she jumped. "What did you want me to say? 'Don't tell me about your boyfriends, kid, because it's killing me to hear how much you adore them?' Grow up, Rikku." It was a cruel thing to say, and he knew it. He just didn't particularly care at the moment.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Gippal."

He knew that already. He could hear it in her voice.

"Yeah, whatever. Look, just...just get out of here for a while, would you?" He couldn't look at her. He didn't want to see her pity.

She didn't have to be told twice. She ran.

This time, Gippal told himself, he was justified in getting horribly drunk. He wasted little time and went straight for his best whiskey. He twisted off the cap, and didn't even bother with a glass. He tilted the bottle to his lips and chugged a considerable amount. It burned like hell, but it did the trick. Soon enough, this whole unpleasant episode would be completely forgotten.

--

"So what did you do then?" Paine passed Rikku a tissue, patting her back in a very un-Paine-like manner.

"What do you think I did? I got the hell out of Djose. He told me to leave." Rikku sniffled, resting her cheek on her folded arms.

Paine sighed. "He told you to leave, but he wanted you to stay."

"That doesn't make any sense."

"It makes perfect sense." Paine whacked the back of Rikku's head.

"He hates me," Rikku replied mournfully, rubbing the spot that Paine had hit. She was too upset to complain about it. It seemed her world was crashing down around her. "He told me to leave Djose. He doesn't want to see me anymore. We're not…" she struggled to get out the words as a fresh bout of tears sprung to her eyes. "…We're not best friends anymore."

"Rikku, Gippal doesn't want to be best friends with you," Paine said. Rikku dropped her head back onto her arms, choking back a sob.

"I know," she said. "I kind of figured that part out on my own, thanks."

"Look, that's not what I meant." Paine grabbed a fistful of her hair in frustration. "He doesn't just want to be best friends with you. He wants to be more than just friends, and he probably thinks you pity him."

"Huh?" Rikku raised her head, swiping away tears.

"If I know Gippal, and I believe that we've established that I do, he's probably getting wasted right now. You feel like you've lost your best friend, right?" She watched Rikku nod hesitantly. "Well, to Gippal, you were more than a friend. He's probably just as devastated, okay? So you're going to have to choose."

"Choose?"

"Knowing what you do now, do you still want Gippal around?"

Rikku thought back. As much as she'd been the only constant woman in Gippal's life, he'd been the only constant man in hers. Practically every major memory she had involved him. He'd always been there for her. She couldn't imagine not having him there to laugh with her, or to be her shoulder to cry on, or even to make her chocolate-chip pancakes at three in the morning. Cutting Gippal out of her life would be like cutting off a limb – he was the most important person in her life. He always had been.

"Of course I still want him around," she said. "He's…he's Gippal. I need him."

"You can't just be friends anymore," Paine cautioned. "There's no going back. You go forward together, or you go your separate ways. He'll never forget, and neither will you."

"So I've got to sleep with him or never speak to him again."

"Pretty much. Distasteful?"

"No," Rikku shook her head. Gippal had always been good-looking. "I just…tried never to think of him that way. I thought it'd be better if we never complicated our friendship." She laughed a little. "Besides, he always had plenty of girls fluttering around him. I figured I wouldn't measure up. He's always been such a player that I didn't think it would be safe to get involved with him. I mean, what if…what if it didn't work out? Then I wouldn't have anything."

"Well, as it turns out, you're the standard by which all other women are measured. Don't you feel lucky?" Paine clapped Rikku's shoulder.

"Not really. I feel like an idiot. I spent so much time trying to be a good best friend that I actually turned out to be a horrible best friend. I've probably hurt him more than anyone else in Spira."

"I wouldn't say that. Nooj shot him once, you know," Paine quipped. Rikku threw a pillow at her.

"Shut up. I'm working up the courage to get my best friend back. Got any booze?"

Paine snorted. "Not if you're flying back to Djose."

"I promise I won't drink it until I've landed. I think I'm going to need some liquid courage for this."

"Don't sleep with him if you've got to get drunk to do it. That is not a healthy beginning for a relationship. You'll regret it, and you'll be giving him false hope." Paine seemed totally unperturbed by their conversation, whereas Rikku couldn't seem to fight off her blush.

"Look, I don't have to get drunk to sleep with Gippal," Rikku sighed. "It's just…you know, like the feeling that you get when you want to do something, you're just really nervous about it, and you don't know if you can do it without help?" Paine just looked at her blankly. "Never mind," Rikku said. She stood up, biting her lower lip. Then she ran her fingers through her hair, setting her shoulders resolutely. "Fuck it. I'm going to Djose."

- -

It was well past midnight when she got there, and she expected him to be in bed. But the door was unlocked, and the bed, though rumpled, wasn't occupied. So she dug through his drawers until she found a shirt that she liked, and changed into it. It was nerve-wracking, because she knew that there would be no going back from this step. She hadn't thought that she would ever be in this position, joining the ranks of women that Gippal took to bed. But if any of the stories that she'd heard were true, he'd be a fantastic lover.

"What're you doing here?"

She whirled around with a little surprised cry. For someone who was supposedly hung up on her, he did not look at all happy to see her.

"I thought…I just…" she couldn't seem to force out a complete sentence.

"I told you to leave." He tossed the nearly empty bottle of whiskey onto the bed, striding unsteadily towards her. His hair was mussed, and he was slurring a bit. She guessed he'd been drinking for a while. Paine was right on all counts. Nervously, she tugged the hem of the shirt down a little lower. It was different, wearing something revealing around him and knowing he was noticing.

"Dammit, Rikku." He was scowling. It couldn't be a good sign. Rikku's confidence was steadily dropping, and tears pricked her eyes. With a harsh sound, he moved closer, yanking her into his embrace. His arms closed tightly around her, and one of his hands urged her head against his shoulder.

"Don't cry, kid. It's okay." His voice was suddenly soft and gentle.

And right then she really, really wanted to cry. Because Paine was right. Gippal didn't hate her.

Her fingers raked against the fabric of his shirt, and he was just drunk enough that he didn't realize she'd been working the buttons of his shirt free until it was hanging open and she was tugging it off of him.

"Hey, wait just a…Cid's girl, what the hell are you doing?" It was a lousy protest, and his reflexes were impaired enough that he couldn't stop her from yanking at his belt buckle. And from there, it was only a few moments before she tugged down his pants, revealing the same gag-gift-boxers he'd hid from her a few weeks before. It surprised her.

"You actually wear those?"

"Yeah." He was confused enough to answer.

"Why?"

"Because you gave them to me."

It was, she realized, the answer she wanted to hear. So she pushed him backwards, conveniently tripping him on his own pants, which slid completely off as he landed half on the bed. The bottle of whiskey bounced off, landing with a muffled 'thunk' on the carpet.

She climbed onto the bed, straddling his hips. His hands came up to hold her hips, keeping her steady. She slid her hands over his chest, which was warm and hard beneath her fingers.

"This must be a dream."

It had never occurred to her that she could possibly be someone's dream. But, she mused, his was about to come true.