Disclaimer: I do not own Watchmen.
DR. MANHATTAN'S WEAKNESS
It was a rather peaceful day in New York, with a 0% rating of crime so far, so the Minutemen decided to waste some time by hanging out at the local pool. Captain Metropolis oddly declined the offer, since he had to attend church with his mother that day. Zeidt was busy, as well.
Anyway...
"C'mon, Jon, the water's really great!!" Laurie called out to her big blue boyfriend as she waded around in the deep-end of the large pool. The Comedian was about to swim over to their female companion, a lustful expression on his face, when Dan grabbed him in a head-lock, and the two men began to wrestle underwater. Out by the pool's edge, Rorschach and Dr. Manhattan sat on two folding chairs, seemingly content with remaining dry. Rorschach was wearing his custom-made US Flag swimming trunks, and Dr. Manhattan was naked as usual. Every now and then, passerby would give them strange looks, and others would smirk at the sight of the blue man's genitals.
"...Going in?" Rorschach grunted.
Dr. Manhattan shook his head. "No thank you. I'm...I'm much happier watching the others enjoy themselves in the water..."
Rorschach raised an eyebrow. "Afraid?"
"What? No...no, of course not..." Dr. Manhattan stammered; the slight hint of nervousness in his voice was easily caught by Rorschach's acute hearing.
"Then swim,"
"No thanks."
"Prove you're not afraid..."
"I don't need to prove anything to you."
"Yes, you do. Don't...and I'll tell others you can't swim..."
Dr. Manhattan's glowing white eyes grew wide. "W-What...?!"
"Show that you can swim...nothing to lose..."
"Rorschach...like I just said, I don't need to prove anything to you...now be quiet..."
Rorschach wasn't happy with that reply; standing up, he walked around the back of Dr. Manhattan's chair, and flipped it over, causing the blue man to tumble directly into the pool. Dr. Manhattan burst out of the water and waved his arms around frantically for a moment before sinking back under, and several bubbles floated up to the surface...and then there was nothing.
"...OH MY GOD!!!" Laurie shrieked in horror.
Rorschach cringed. "...Had not expected this...will investigate later..."
"WE HAVE TO SAVE HIM!!! JON CAN'T SWIM!!!" Laurie cried.
The Comedian was about to rush over to save his god-like ally, when he stopped. Turning to Laurie, he asked, "Wait a fuckin' minute here...he's invincible, he can teleport anywhere in the world, he can blow people to smithereens just by thinking about it, he can breath perfectly fine in space...and yet he can still drown?"
"YES!!!" Laurie snapped, "NOW SAVE HIM, YOU DICKHEAD!!!"
"Geez...no need for harsh words there, little missy..."
Rorschach took a step forward, only an inch away now from plunging into the deep pool. Pulling off his mask, he tossed it off to the side, and proclaimed, "IS MY FAULT...WILL SAVE HIM NOW!!!"
"No, Rorschach!!! Don't be a hero!!!" Dan shouted.
Rorschach ignored Dan's plea, and he performed a graceful dive into the water...and he sunk like a rock.
"RORSCHACH CAN'T SWIM, EITHER?!!!" Laurie and The Comedian both exclaimed in unison.
Dan nodded. "That's why I told him not to be a hero!!!"
In the end, Rorschach and Dr. Manhattan were rescued by the combined efforts of Dan and The Comedian, who had both decided that it would be best for the team if their two teammates took swimming lessons for a while...