A couple of days later, Gil assigns Sara to work with him on a death case. She has been very sullen since their last meeting, waiting to see if he'll sign her leave request. The fact that he's been carrying on like nothing happened between them makes her even more uncomfortable around him. She has no way of knowing if he's angry, disappointed, or just relieved she wants out. When he assigned her to work with him, Sara figured he just didn't trust her to work alone after her behavior of the last few days. Her confidence has taken a severe blow after Grissom turned her down and she didn't have the energy left to confront him.
They are now seated in the bleachers of an ice hockey arena, going over the previous night's game notes to find some reason for the death of one of the players. Gil tries to stay focused on the notes as Sara sits a noticeable distance from him, staring out over the ice as if she can't bear to look at him. Gil had done a lot of serious thinking and came to the conclusion he had to do what-ever he could to make Sara stay. Gil decided to make some subtle changes. The plant had been the first and Sara saw that for what it was... a peace offering. He glances at her briefly, then continues to read from the notes.
"Ten minutes for high-sticking, five minutes for penalty plays... four times, twenty minutes for attacking another player..."
"Boys will be boys."
"Looks like they came for a fight and a hockey game broke out."
"You just don't like sports."
"That's not true... I've been a baseball fan all my life."
"Baseball, that figures... all those numbers and stats." She isn't rude or obstinate, but her comments leave no doubt she isn't happy with him.
Gil darts a quick glance at her profile, noting her sarcasm. He ignores her attitude and simply shrugs as he continues, "What can I say, it's a beautiful game."
"Since when have you been interested in beauty?"
"Since I met you."
Unsure she heard him, Sara quickly looks over to him, but Gil has his head down, studying the notes. Her surprise is obvious, but he doesn't give her a chance to comment as he quickly moves on. "I've divided the ice into quadrants. You take east and work to center... I'll do the same from the west. Okay?"
"Aahh... yeah, okay."
He gets up and heads down the stairs towards the ice. Sara stays seated for a long moment, confused more than ever. Had he really said she was beautiful? By the time she pulls herself together he is almost to the ice and turns to see what is keeping her. Sara jumps to her feet, blushing at having been caught in a daze. Gil knows his comment knocked her for a loop and turns back to the ice with a private smile. They work the case for the next couple of days and Gil never again makes any comments which might indicate something personal.
When the case of the murdered nurse comes in a couple of weeks later, the whole team works it. They all wait outside for Grissom to complete his initial walk through of the crime scene. When he finally gives out the assignments, he seems disturbed. Sara is relegated to the outside perimeter, which shocks her because she and Grissom have been working so well together. What she doesn't know is this murder victim looks like her twin sister. Grissom is just trying to protect her from seeing herself lying on the bathroom floor in a pool of blood.
Catherine works the interior with him and sees the resemblance immediately. She notices Gil stopping to simply stare at the body several times. She gently refocuses his attention to keep him from getting too wrapped up in this case. He works around the clock... in some bazaar way protecting Sara by finding the nurse's killer. Catherine knows Sara is upset at being kept out of the crime scene and tries to explain it to her one night after Sara had been sent to process the body in the morgue. Cleaned up by then, Sara saw the resemblance. She now understands why Grissom kept her out of the scene.
When Gil interviews Doctor Lurey, the killer, he has been on this case non-stop for over forty-eight hours with no sleep. He is tired and his nerves are on end because they really don't have enough to hold this guy for what he did. Captain Brass is just about to let him walk out when Gil finally speaks to the doctor on a personal level.
"It's sad, isn't it, Doc? Guys like us... two men who dedicated their lives to their careers. We
never touch another person unless we're wearing our latex gloves. And then one day we wake up and realize for fifty years we haven't really lived at all. Then we're given another chance. A beautiful woman comes along and offers us a chance at a new life... but do we risk it all in order to have that life? You did... and she showed you a wonderful life, didn't she? But then she took it away and gave it to someone else... so you took her life."
Gil's emotional speech is enough to break through the doctor's tough exterior and his eyes flood with tears as he nods his head and huskily confesses, "Yes... I did, but I'm still here."
"I couldn't do it... I love her enough to..."
"Then I pity you, Mr. Grissom."
"So do I, but I pity you more."
With this tears slide slowly down the doctor's cheeks and he turns to his lawyer. The other man just ushers him outside, not sure what to say or do for his client now. Brass moves to the door and motions for an officer to book Dr. Lurey. When they are gone, Gil looks sadly over to his friend. Brass knows who he was referring to in his own life. He has no words of comfort for his friend and leaves Gil alone with his thoughts. Gil stares down at his hands on the table, overwhelmed with regret for how he's handled his life. He sighs deeply and hangs his head in exhaustion; unaware Sara has been watching the interview through the one-way glass of the observation room. She heard his speech and her heart fills with love, knowing he meant her. She now understands the wall between them... even if she doesn't know how to knock it down.
Grissom avoids Sara for the rest of the week, feeling too vulnerable after that case. Catherine as always is his shield and he takes her with him on every case. Giving Sara assignments with Nick or Warrick. She's wanted independent assignments, but now, she'd give anything to be back working with Grissom. During their time apart, Sara does a lot of thinking about what he said. It confirms her fantasy that began in San Francisco... he was attracted to her. She just didn't know how to get around this huge obstacle between them.
Sara is currently working a murder case where a young woman was raped and stabbed in her bed. The case is upsetting because the police may have rushed things and arrested the wrong man. Everyone is hurrying to process the evidence. Sara has hung the bloody sheet up in the evidence room, staring at the patterns on it in the hopes something will jump out at her. They've already confirmed the suspect left car wax on the victim's wrists and sheets, but how did it get there? She is totally engrossed in envisioning the struggle in her mind, matching it to the patterns on the sheet when Gil walks by.
He also stares at the sheet for several minutes before he asks, "What are you thinking?"
"The blood stains on the sheet... there's a void..."
"Made by?"
"Her body... here... and here, but..." She motions to the sheet and then the solution comes to her. She turns her back to the sheet, facing Grissom as she looks him in the eye for the first time. Their eyes hold for a moment before she raises her arms in a defensive manner between them. "Pin me down."
Gil hesitates only a moment, then raises his hands up to grab Sara gently by the wrists. They stand in front of the sheet, but don't actually touch it as she slowly moves her arms up and down to simulate struggle. She glances over her shoulder at the sheet and explains, "At first... she struggled with him... while he held her down."
"Which accounts for the wax found on her wrists."
"Then... she stops struggling... and gives up..." She stops moving her arms, but Gil doesn't let go of her wrists. She glances from the sheet to him and their eyes lock for a long moment. "When he got up... he used his hands for leverage on the bed."
"Placing his hands here..." He slowly lets go of her arms and lowers his hands to a position on either side of her waist. He holds them here, simulating pushing off the sheet to raise himself off her body.
"But the wax was under the blood stains. She wasn't bleeding after the rape."
"So, he came back to finish her off... after reality set in."
"Yeah."
Again they fall silent as the tension crackles between them. Sara still has her hands raised on either side of her head and can't put them down without touching him in some way. Gil doesn't notice her uncomfortable dilemma. They were discussing a horrible murder one minute and the next Sara's whole body is tingling at his nearness. Gil doesn't seem to be in any hurry to step back so she abruptly lowers her eyes and slips away from him. She slides out between him and the sheet and quickly steps away.
He turns to watch her go, confused as she stammers, "Grissom... I... there was something I wanted to talk to you about."
"Yes?"
With some distance between them now, Sara feels more in control, but still has to force herself to look him in the eye. "Last week... with the doctor... I heard you."
Gil sighs; it never occurred to him anyone was watching the interview from behind the glass. He shouldn't have said anything, but if he hadn't the doctor would have gotten away with murder. He holds her eyes now, knowing she understood. He decides to be honest and lowers his voice to a huskily level only she can hear.
"I'm sorry, Sara. I shouldn't have said that..."
"What you should do is... be honest with me... and yourself about this."
Gil is stunned by her statement and can only stare at her. Before his brain can recover, Catherine briskly walks in, looking for Grissom. Realizing she interrupted something she stops in surprise at the scene. "Hey, Grissom... You ready? Oops...?!"
They both turn, trying to appear calm, but the tension is obvious. Catherine looks from Sara's blushing cheeks to Gil's frown and knows she definitely interrupted something. She tries to hide her smile as she innocently asks, "Should I come back later?"
Gil glances from her to Sara, who turns away in embarrassment. He isn't prepared to explain what just happened so he doesn't even try. Instead he runs an agitated hand around the back of his neck and gives Catherine a warning glare.
Catherine chooses to ignore his warning and smugly asks, "You want me to go on ahead? Or are we canceling dinner?"
Gil clears his throat and gives Sara one more glance before he moves to the door. "No... let's go."
He hurries out ahead of Catherine, who gives Sara one last glance. She's curious about what happened, but doubts Sara is up to talking about it right now. For that matter, she doubts Gil will tell her what happened either. She sighs and hurries after him, feeling sorry for Sara.
Sara stands in the evidence room for a long time, stunned and hurt by his quick exit to be with Catherine. How could he stand here, admit he has feelings for her, and then calmly walk off to have dinner with Catherine?