Title: Decode
Chapter 02: Ward
Author: snarkysweetness
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Skye/Ward with the rest of Coulson's new team & Garrett's Hydra team
Summary: Ward's mission had been simple: infiltrate Coulson's team and report back to Hydra. He never intended to fall in love any more than Skye expected that the guys in suits would become her family. Torn apart by Ward's betrayal, Ward struggles with his loyalties and desires to keep Skye safe while Skye pays the price for their indiscretions. When Hydra discovers Skye's origins, her life is placed in danger once more but she carries a secret that may cement Ward's loyalty to Hydra for good.
Warnings: Super heavy on the angst, mild sexual content in some chapters, language, & violence.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Author's Notes: For some reason this hurt more to write than the first chapter. I guess I fell victim to Ward's manpain.

Ward stood apart from the group, too shell-shocked to register anything going on around him. He'd been so sure of his choices. The greater good came first. Garrett had taught him that. He'd agreed to join Coulson's team on his orders. Come in, get close, find out how Coulson was alive, report back. What he hadn't counted on was Coulson's decision to recruit Skye. She'd been a wrench in his plans, an unknown, so he'd gotten close to her to figure her out.

He never could have imagined he'd fall in love in the process. Ward didn't do love, it wasn't his style, but somehow his sunshine rookie had crept underneath his skin and wormed her way into her heart. He truly believed he'd killed the right man when he'd shot Thomas Nash. He was a threat and he refused to allow Skye to be in danger again. Nearly losing Skye had broken him. He was no longer the Hydra sleeper agent firmly grasping to his beliefs.

No, he was a man compromised by a tiny girl who acted before thinking things through and who drove him mad.

And what was even worse was the one man he'd always looked up to, the person who had saved him, was the one responsible. He'd shot the wrong man. Garrett was the Clairvoyant and Ward's loyalties were on the fringe. How could he continue to believe in everything he'd been forced fed as a young man when he'd found a home in Skye and a real family in the team?

Ward had begun this all as a mission but along the way he'd grown to love the team and now he wasn't sure where his loyalties stood.

He stepped out of the room, knowing he wasn't needed. Coulson and Hand were busy contacting other higher-ups and he couldn't be around the team, especially not Trip. Trip had no clue the monster their S.O. was and he wasn't sure he could look him in eye without betraying his secret.

Grant felt sick to his stomach.

What in the hell had he gotten himself into?

He'd been so convinced that S.H.I.E.L.D. was the bad guy but Coulson had shown him that they really did exist to help people. When had Hydra ever done anything but destroy lives? They'd taken him in when he was at his most vulnerable and warped him into their own little trained assassin.

Ward punched a wall and ignored the stinging in his hand.

Given another chance Garrett would try to make an attempt on Skye's life and Ward wasn't sure of much anymore, but he knew he had to keep her safe. She was off-limits. Ward would kill the man who was like a father to him if he even tried to harm another hair on her head.

His loyalty wasn't to Hydra anymore and it wasn't to S.H.I.E.L.D.: it was to the girl who wore flannel t-shirts and called him names and who'd taught him how to love.

Ward found himself in the janitor's closet where he'd shared his first and possibly last kiss with Skye, needing somewhere familiar to collect his thoughts. He had a decision to make; tell Coulson the truth and face his punishment or return to Hydra to be the good little soldier he'd been trained to be.

He couldn't bear the thought of being separated from Skye but the thought of lying to her…

"Grant?"

She only called him that when she was worried. Skye stood in the doorway, illuminated by the hallway lights like his very own guardian angel, and watched him with concern etched onto her features. She'd given him his space after Garrett's arrest, but he didn't want it.

He only wanted her.

On pure impulse Ward grabbed her firmly by the waist and crushed his lips to hers desperately. She was the only thing he was sure of-his anchor. He needed her just as much as he needed air. She returned the kiss as the door clicked closed behind her, leaving them in semi-darkness.

"Ward-" she whispered, trying to break free of his grasp. "We should talk about-"

He cut her off with another kiss. It was gentler this time and he pulled her against his chest. "Please," he whispered as his hands moved to cup her face, not wanting to talk. He wasn't one for conversation to begin with but he had no clue how to have the one they needed to have. He was a man of action. "I just…" He pulled away and stared down into her eyes. "I just need to be human for a moment. Let me be human with you."

Skye stared up at him, dumfounded. He knew she was hurting as well. S.H.I.E.L.D. was her family and now it was gone. She was a nurturer, always there to comfort everyone else, and right now he knew they could find comfort in one another.

A moment later she reached up and grabbed his vest the same way she had earlier and pulled him down to her level. Their lips met and he lost himself in her.

This was not the way he wanted to make love to her for the first time; in a janitor closet, against the wall, with most of their clothing still on as they grasped one another franticly. It didn't even occur to him to make it romantic. The moment he tugged her pants off far enough to thrust into her he did so with abandon.

His lips assaulted her neck as he fucked her. Her fingers dug into his shoulder blades as she barked out commands.

Faster.

Harder.

Please.

She begged him to let her come and he couldn't deny her anything. He slipped his hand between their bodies and pressed his thumb against the spot she needed him most. She cried out his name and he was glad they were in such a spacious room in a large building. No one would come barging in, interrupting.

Afterward he held her pressed against the wall while his lips trailed along her temple. He wasn't ready to leave her, not yet-not ever, but he knew now what he had to do. Hydra would keep coming for her; to get to Coulson, to get to S.H.I.E.L.D., to get to him. She was in danger from all angles and the only way to truly keep her safe would be to be on the inside. An agent turned spy turning on the very organization he'd defected to in the first place.

He would keep her safe by infiltrating Hydra. Thwart their plans. Make sure to keep her out of harm's way by knowing the threats before they happened and stopping them. He knew he'd be breaking her heart and his own in the process but if it meant she got to survive he was willing to make that sacrifice.

But he couldn't do so without telling her how he felt. She had the right to know that much. It was the only truth he could give her and he owed her the truth, even if it was only a fraction of it.

"I love you, Skye," he whispered as he gazed down at her. Her entire face showed her surprise as she stared up at him, dumbfounded. He cupped her chin in his hands and lowered his voice. "No matter what happens after we leave this room, promise me you'll remember that." He wasn't sure he'd see her again after tonight. Hell, he hoped he didn't; it would mean she was safe, but he wanted her to know, deep down, everything he did was for her.

"Grant-"

"I love you," he repeated before pressing one final, tender kiss to her lips. He released her and before she could stop him he left the room, a plan already in mind.

Ward wasn't a wishing man but if he could wish his way back in time to fix things he would. It'd been weeks since he'd left the team and killed three agents in the process. The guilt was bad enough but missing Skye was the worst. Even if he could escape Hydra they could never be together. He'd done too much damage. But the desire to go back and be with her never left him. He wanted to do things right, to love her the way she deserved, but there was no going back.

Ward tuned out as Garrett went on and on, telling another one of his stories. Stories Ward had once found amusing but now they only highlighted how twisted his mentor really was.

"Ward? Did you hear me?"

He blinked and focused on Garrett.

"Of course, sir."

"And here I thought you were still hung up on the girl, it's about time you got over her."

Ward suddenly went on alert. Was Skye in danger? Dammit, he should have been paying attention. He kept his panic at bay and simply shrugged.

"I told you, momentary flirtation, sir."

"Good, I wouldn't want you compromised, kid. Though, I gotta say, if I found out a chick I'd been banging was some sort of alien mutant I'd be a lot more freaked out than you are."

A-Ward blinked. A what?

"Alien?"

Garrett shrugged.

"0-8-4, whatever you want to call it. Doc got the results on that blood Coulson's scientist submitted for testing. Whatever your girl is, she ain't all human."

Ward's heart pounded heavily in his chest. Small puzzle pieces began to form a picture. He knew she'd been moved around by S.H.I.E.L.D. after her parent's deaths but he never bothered to find out why. Her file was thin compared to the rest of the team. She'd erased her past and now he knew why.

And if she was an 0-8-4…

That meant Hydra wouldn't be the only ones after her. Leviathan was a myth to most organizations, but they were real, and they were rumored to go after gifted individuals, the way Centipede did.

Skye was in danger, and not just because of the people who loved her.

How in the hell was he supposed to keep her safe knowing Garrett wasn't the only one who would go after her?

"Grant?"

He blinked and turned his focus back to Garrett.

With a shrug he pushed himself away from the wall. "What can I say, boss? She was killer in the sack, alien or not." He did his best to sound indifferent and he wanted to vomit. Every lie that came out of his mouth made him hate himself even more. How had he ever bought into all of this crap? Even Garrett didn't believe, he just enjoyed being on the winning team.

"Good, so you won't have a problem helping the task team bring her in?"

"Of course not, it might be fun," he teased.

Garrett grinned. "You can have her after Doc's done with her. She can be your reward for finally ridding me of that pain in the ass Victoria Hand. Talk about wild in the sack." Ward tried not to flinch. He'd taken plenty of lives, people who deserved it, but Victoria Hand and his fellow agents on that plane would forever haunt him. He only thought about them when he wanted to hate himself more than he already did.

Ward took a seat and set his gun on the table, out of his reach. The urge to kill Garrett was always there but he kept him alive simply because the devil he knew was far safer than whoever would take his place. Ward knew how to manipulate Garrett: he couldn't risk Skye's life because he wanted revenge.

He would keep playing the part because it was the only way he could keep her safe from Hydra. He'd figure out how to keep her safe from others eventually, but for now, playing buddy to Garrett was the best he could do.

"So, what's the plan?"