Dear Cartman,
Oh God, I should have known something like this would happen. So your patient's a satanic goth now? Great, real fucking great.
Still, you don't have to cry about it so much. I can practically hear your whining all over that last letter. Relax, dude, Jesus Christ. I'll save your ass. It's what I thought would happen anyway.
So he sees church as "conformist shit," huh? And you're wondering what I would do about it? Well, it would be harder to figure out SINCE YOU STILL HAVEN'T DESCRIBED HIM BETTER THAN "WEAK-ASS HIPPIE SHIT," but if I were you I'd suggest getting that thought turned around. He needs to stop seeing church as "that place Mom forces me to go." Maybe take the word "conformist" out of his vocabulary. It sounds obnoxious.
Oh, and remember God's plan. He wants us to merely show the humans the path of righteousness, not shove it up their ass. Hm, maybe some of the humans could learn that lesson too. Even some of our fellow brothers have been too obsessed with that shit. And for once I'm not refering to you in my complaint. I guess this is your lucky day. Oh wait, no, you still have the weak-ass hippie to deal with.
Your friend that's not obsessed with asses,
Kyle.