Author notes:The film choice nad budweiser were just my little way of having a bit of fun, gold stars to all of you who got the reference :)
This was finished way sooner than I anticipated and I am so much happier with the writing style than I was with part 1. Less focus on the humor this time, more on Shep/Garrus, although have still tried to keep it light and comical (hopefully).
I think Tali is the kind of person who would feel responsible for something which really wasn't her fault, don't you?
The third part and finale of this epic space adventure has been roughly drafted in my head, but so far it's just a big ball of fluff between S&G. Hmm. Watch this space,x
"Why Shepard?"
"And a top of the morning to you too!" Shepard replied sarcastically in a mock-Irish accent to the mystery voice as she rolled over, trying to ignore the pounding in her head.
Garrus folded his arms. "I don't know exactly what you got up to last night; but Zaeed is cursing about someone stealing some beer he won in some barfight 20 years ago, Mordin's laboratory is trashed and the ethanol he needed to extract the DNA from fruit samples has mysteriously vanished, Tali hasn't been seen all day, Kelly Chambers was found wandering around the citadel in the early hours of this morning in an outfit which can only be described as unsavoury..."
What exactly had she been doing last night? Memories slowly began to flood back into her; she could remember a lot of wine, a drinking contest involving shots of ethanol, making out with Kelly Chambers while Tali lay face down on her bed having just had one shot too many, a huge blank, wandering around the Citadel buying things off a list and then...
Oh shit.
"...and on top of that I can't stay in the Main Battery for more than 5 minutes without passing out due to the smell of cheap perfume, all of the calibra- work I had scheduled for this morning won't be done. So, would you care to explain Shepard?"
Typical Garrus, it's always about the damn calibrations. Shepard mumbled something into her pillow as the pain in her head began to intensify.
Looking down at her he couldn't help but realise how easy it was to forget how small the Commander really was; seeing her curled up in her bed looking so vulnerable sparked something in the back of his mind. He was reminded of the first time he'd come home to his father drunk: Amazingly - and despite the huge fight they had the night beforehand - he hadn't reprimanded him too harshly, saying darkly the next morning it was a "crime which carried its own punishment". Remembering this, he couldn't help but feel a little sorry for Shepard.
"Besides, don't you think that's a little extreme, even for you Commander?" He said, taking care to lighten his tone slightly "I'm not expert, but I always thought that the typical way humans initiate mating rituals was a box of chocolates or a cute card..."
Garrus was saying something, but Shepard was having trouble focusing on what it was, the nausea which she had been battling with since she had been awoken was finally beginning to win. She hopped out of bed and made a mad dash for her bathroom, making a series of expletives and unladylike noises as she was horribly sick. When she returned, Garrus had left.
Oh shit indeed.
Tali'Zorah vas Normandy could have kicked herself when she heard what Shepard and Kelly had done.
Weeks of gossip, planning and cajoling all gone to waste because she was stupid enough to allow herself to get drunk. Stupid, stupid, stupid! She should have told them whatever it was they were planning was a bad idea, not slunk away and passed out in the hangar. When she came to, she wandered up to the mess area hoping to get some food to settle her stomach. And there he was.
She was about to turn on her heel and leave when she noticed Shepard standing there too. Banter about who had the most stylish kill on the last mission was replaced by an awkward silence; with Shepard grabbing a bunch of stuff out of the fridge as quickly as possible, stumbling a few times and shooting crestfallen glances at Garrus whilst he pretended not to notice. In that moment, whatever guilt she had felt when she woke had tripled.
Stupid! She shouldn't have just blindly drunk ethanol without at least looking up the effects of it on Quarians on the extranet - which had turned out to be far, far more potent to her than humans. She was never particularly good at holding her drink back on the flotilla anyway, let alone compared to the legendary Commander Shepard. That ethanol did have an interesting effect on her however, albeit very, very strange: Passed out she had began to have the most vivid dreams; Kal being in the engine room cleaning oil off of the main engine with a dirty rag, Kal turning around giving her a stare so intense she could feel it through his mask, Kal taking her up into his strong arms...
Tali clasped her arms around her chest tightly, glad that her suit hid her blushes from Gabby and Ken. She began to wonder how she could convince Mordin to give her some more ethanol...
Shepard lay down on her bed exasperated. After having persuaded Jack to allow her to nurse her hangover in the dark area underneath the ship without being bothering her too much, she'd just managed to spectacularly time her trip to the mess area for food with Garrus'. They had exchanged a polite "hello" and other than that...
Well other than that he'd outright ignored her. Crap, she must have really pissed him off with her antics last night; either that or he must think she was some crazy human with a weird fetish for aliens and/or some insane jealousy problem.
"Next thing you know, Shepard has disabled EDI from the ship because Joker would rather argue with her than play make nice with Commander" She muttered to herself under her breath.
It was no good whining about it; looking back now her behaviour had not only been disruptive to Garrus, but disruptive to the whole mission: Supposing that they found themselves face to face with a giant collector ship and the gun wouldn't fire quite right as the calibrations were off? Garrus only holed himself up in the main battery calibrating endlessly for the sake of the ship and crew.
Grabbing some card and a pen off of her desk, she knew what she had to do.
"Do things right, or don't do them at all."
A pure Turian through and through, as soon as EDI had fumigated the smell from the main battery, Garrus started work to catch up on his missed calibrations, refusing to take any shortcuts whatsoever in order to get the job done before bed. Consequently, he had fallen asleep in the main battery again.
Upon awakening, he walked over to the main console to see if any new calibrations needed to be done and was surprised to see an envelope placed over the main screen. Garrus it read on the front in an all-too-familiar handwriting; heart pounding, he ripped it open and out fell a handmade card. On closer inspection he saw someone had drawn a cartoon version of Shepard, complete with N7 armour, on the front; she wore a very sad expression her face as she was stood alone on the surface of a crater filled planet surrounded by an army of stars which formed swirling patterns around her. Wow, who knew the great Commander Shepard was secretly an artist?
Space sure feels empty without you.
He couldn't help but chuckle, only Shepard could think of a pun that bad and get away with it.
He opened the card and began to read the message inside.
Garrus,
I'm sorry. I don't know whether you think I'm some weird alien fetishist, a crazy bitch or whatever, but I do know that how I acted was extremely selfish and immature. Please try and see it from my point of view too though: Here I am, on a strange ship full of strange people I've only just met and one of my best friends won't even talk to me seriously for 5 minutes; I mean, what the hell Vakarian? It's not like you have a thing for bits of motherboard or anything, do you? Anyway, I'm going to have to cut short here; Chambers has just burst on up here and is demanding to see what I've been doing instead of dealing with the messages at my personal terminal.
Love (unless that makes you feel weird, in which case, yours sincerely),
Shepard
P.S. I got Kasumi to sneak this into the main battery after you fell asleep, so you might want to check that nothing has been 'misplaced'.
Screw the calibrations for one morning: Garrus half ran-half jogged out of the room and made a beeline for the elevator which would take him straight to Shepard's personal quarters.