A/N: You see, this is actually a huge story. Yes, it has a plot. It's not a one-shot collection at all. It's a whole story, with each event falling in place for Lu Xun's highschool life.

WHATTTT? This means this is a High School fic? Unfortunately, yes.

So yeah, a lot of humor. And you may see pairings. You know, the historical ones.

And yep, I'm switching to first person. I need to practice writing in that perspective. Not much will change, don't worry. Don't mind about my fourth wall breaking.~

And changing the rating to T. Ugh, I misrate things a whole lot.

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Guest-Thank you so much! I'm glad you like the story. And yep, there is more to it.~ For the fanbase, I guess I'll just throw in some teasers. There may be some non-canon pairings, but it would remain one-sided. *Cough* Gou Jia x Wang Yi *Cough.* (I love that pairing, even though no one else likes it….~)

The Adventures of Troll Xun

-"Jiang Wei's birthday…?"-

The distinct beeping was voiced through the clock. I gave a quick sigh, and rolled over on my bed to reach it. I lazily slapped my hand onto the base of my digital clock. It should feel lucky that I didn't burn it yet.

Because I was really tempted.

But unfortunately, my mom just HAD to take away my matches and lighter. She suspected me of smoking….I'm not sure why in the world she would think that, though. She really did interrogate me that night.

I was very tired, so I was too lazy to even get up.

My body was stiff and wouldn't move an inch. I shuffled my feet, and groaned obnoxiously. I swear, I will really table flip on someone. Preferably Jiang Wei…. But uh, he didn't need to hear that.

I lumbered toward the door, being a stiff stick. I opened the door like the stupid brainless zombie I was and groggily started to get ready for school.

Yep, primping.~ I brushed my totally fluffy brown hair, and made side braids on both sides of my head. Yes, I really need to chop off these braids…My hair is way too long. Maybe I should get a trim. Later.

I picked up my toothbrush, and squirted toothpaste on it.

Yep. The morning routine, and yes, I will not tell you anymore of my morning ritual, because I'm pretty afraid of you, milady/my good sir, being bored as hell.

Since I'm the best and most BENEVOLENT guy ever, I'm going to save you the trouble of reading such more trivial matters.

TIME SKIP AWAY, MY GOOD AUTHOR.

Timeskip to first period gym.

I, in complete triumph walked into my first class, gym. As much as I hated it, I will do the best I can, even if I am not physically athletic in any way. You can say mentally, but not physically. I sighed, and brushed my bangs to the side.

I saw a boy with caramel brown hair gathered into a pony tail in the back. I swear, what's with people and long hair? He walked up to me in his dark green uniform, his brown eyes gleaming. I blinked slightly, worried about what was he going to start talking about.

"Xun!" He exclaimed, his sparkling brown eyes filled with excitement, "can I ask you somethingggg?"

And this, is my friend Jiang Wei. That's his full name, by the way. Most people call him by his full name or last name. No one calls him Wei, because it's really weird knowing that a group of the popular kids were called that. He used to be part of it. But, since he's a complete lame dude, he "defected" to Shu.

Like seriously. He should've picked my lunch table. I mean, we are awesome!

He just doesn't see it.

Hmmph.

"Yeah, you can." I replied to his question. He smiled softly.

"Okay, so my birthday is this Saturday, and I'm going to invite you to hang out with me." He explained, his arms opened wide.

"Like what, a party?" I scoffed. He pouted.

"Now there, Xunnie, don't be a jackass."

"Whatever." I answered his insult/joke, "who's going to be there, anyways?"
"Oh, that's easy! Our regular gym group!"
"Meaning Shang Xiang, Tong, Jia, Hui, and me."

"Exactly."

"When I think of it, why the hell does Shang Xiang hang out with us anyways?" Jiang asked, rolling his eyes, "we seriously need more girls or something."

"Eh, she's just one of the guys, I guess." A new voice appeared in our conversation magically. Both Jiang and I turned to the new arrival. The owner of the voice was Ling Tong, of course.

Whoa. Sudden realization. Every guy I know except Jia has long hair.

SO LAMEEE….

That's right, Jia is the only awesome one, even though he's a huge douchebag and a total pimp. Ah, I totally don't mean to offend him, but it's the cold hard truth.

No wonder he keeps getting rejected by Wang Yi.

Poor him. He'll get her one day. Hopefully. I'll keep on rooting for him, even though most of us highly doubt it.

"Xun." Tong's voice was ringing in my ear. I snapped back into reality, I have to get out of my wonderous thinking.

"Hn..?" I replied, a bit curious why he suddenly called me out.

"Coach told us to gtfo of here for no apparent reason." Tong whispered in my ear. I nodded in response curious into why exactly. I started to march out of this stupid gym and hid my happiness for the sake of those who are actually athletic. I seriously hate this class with all of me and my freaking urhgjhgksjhksjhgksg…

"Tong, don't use random text talk all of the sudden." I said unanimously while walking out. He gave a small shrug, and we both continued to walk.

"XUN!" I heard Shang Xiang's voice call to me. I gulped. Crap, I sincerely hope that it wasn't her I trolled yesterday.

But, as fate has to be an EVEN BETTER troll than I AMMMMM…..she was.

"ARE YOU THE APPRENTICE'S FIRE ON THAT GAME?" She yelled, her face red with pure anger. I bit my lip, and decided to weave up a small lie.

Before I could even attempt or even think of running away (I just thought so now…), she instantly grasped onto my shoulder. Lying has to do, for now.

"What game?" I asked innocently, hoping to steer her away from the small matter. (Okay, maybe it's not small…)

"Um, a game like, I think it's called Mass Path." She replied, rolling her eyes, She continued to grumble to herself about being trolled and The Apprentice's Fire.

"….yes?" I quickly answered to that, because I'm a nice person and I don't lie even though I want to so much, "I would like to play it with you, so uh…tell me your username?"
"It's Rebellious Princess."

I froze. Oh crap. Yep, that girl definitely did remind me of her. And it just had to be her. Hmm, seems like it is a small world after all. I'm scared to say that I am the Apprentice's Fire.

"I'mverysorryfortrollingyou!" I exclaimed all in one breath, panting. She glared at me. I shook under her hard death stare. I couldn't move, I was too nervous too. I honestly can't believe that I am this weak… I can't move though, as much as a I try.

It's really hard. I felt the small beads of sweat flowing down around my body. Okay, that sounded weird, didn't it?

She bit her lip, irritated, yet, holding herself back as much as possible.

"….." She remained silent.

We both paused for a moment.

It was a very much awkward silence, as you can tell.

Very, very awkward.

So awkward you don't even know.

Okay, I'm very sorry for troubling you with the prospect of the insane amount of awkwardness just in the atmosphere between my friend, the devil, Shang Xiang and I.

SO AWKWARD.

"YOU LITTLE BASTARD, DON'T DO THAT!" She cried, shaking me continuously. My eyes were dazed, and my vision was blurred. She kept shaking me back and force. I sighed, and flicked her slightly on the forehead. Then, I was let go, and luckily, I landed on my feet.

Yay, she didn't drop me to the ground and bleed to death. At least I'm still alive.

"…sorry, Shang Xiang." I apologized quietly, not meaning at all for her to hear that. She winced, and was rubbing the spot where I had flicked her. She had flinched back and is now squirming on the ground like a lost caterpillar. How sad.

Seriously, it hurt that bad?

"Whatever you bastard, I'll get over it," She protested before I could comfort her one bit, "don't go all ojou-sama on me, okay?"

"Okay." I smiled at her, even she didn't want it, I stuck out a hand to her.

"HEY! I SAID NOT TO HELP ME!" She yelled, irritated at me. I chuckled out loud to her a bit-slightly, and shrugged it off.

~:~:~:~:~

At some restaurant, Jiang Wei's Birthday, this Saturday at 12:00.

I was really bored. I was just stuck between playing around on my almost dead iPod Touch and flicking water into everyone's faces.

They never suspected me. Ahahaha. Victory for me, I suppose.

"Hey," Jiang Wei started, his whisper full of rasp, "whatever you do, don't tell anyone that it's my birthday."

I cheekily smiled at Hui and Jia. "Okay."

"So, like yeah, I hate doctors because they always sexually harass people, and want to look into my stuff…" Tong complained, ranting about his hatred of therapists and doctors. "AND UGH THERAPISTS. I mean, it's THE RAPIST."

"Shut up, Tong, you don't have any stuff!" Shang Xiang yelled at him, throwing a fork at him. He rolled his eyes.

"How do you even know that he has the stuff or not, eh, Shang Xiang…?~" I made the comment out of the blur. The two of them stared at me with red faces.

"OH GOD, XUN!" The two of them yelled at me. I felt impact at the back of my….back…

"Good job, Xunnie.~" Jia sang, smiling at me.

~:~:~:~:~:~

After Eating….

We all called out to the waiter.

"HEY WAITER!" We yelled impolitely. We should have addressed him in a more polite approach, shouldn't we?

"It's our friend's birthday." Hui sneered, pointing to Jiang Wei. Jiang Wei was talking to Tong and Shang Xiang; he didn't even notice what the three of us were doing.

"Ah, so is it!" The waiter exclaimed, and called over some other employees.

"BIRTHDAY BOY!" They exclaimed, talking to Jiang Wei. Jiang Wei's gaze flickered and turned brith red. He glared at Hui, Jia, and me. We all just smiled at him evilly.

"Happy Happy Birthday! May your dreams come true! Since it's your birthday, you may as well have some cake too! HEY!" They chorused, throwing some cake at him. Jiang Wei glared, and gritted his teeth.

"WHAT DID I TELL YOU?" He yelled at us, throwing the cake on his face at us. We laughed and snickered. We adeptly ignored him, as he continued to missile random pieces of miscellaneous food at us three.

"Happy Birthday, Weiiii.~" We all sang hoping to cover over his over meandering amount of anger directed toward us. He gritted his teeth, but gave up and smiled a real small smile.

"Thank you, I suppose."

I laughed to myself.

2nd Troll Attempt succeeded.

With no trouble at all, either.

A/N: Have you seen my totes beautiful color. Yeah, I spent an hour yesterday drawing that piece of shit.

So yelp. I'm proud of the coloring.

Anyways, I really recommend you people to make some fanfictions yourself. WRITE WRITE WRITE! GANBATTE! YOU CAN DO IT! While I'll be playing DW 6 Empires because that's the only good Empires game…for now.

So, what is your favorite weapon to use in DW 7? I like the flying swords the best. Mhmm…~

Oh, and the situation with Jiang Wei's birthday at the restaurant happened to my sister's friend. xD Not the RAPIST thing, though. That's just some random thing I thought up.

Who do you want Xunnie to troll next? :3