A/N: I've got about three chapters already written for this fic. Love to hear what anyone has to say. Don't be shy.
By the time Irisa reached their rooms she was vibrating with anger, mostly at herself, but at Nolan too, for putting her in this position.
It only mildly surprised her that the rapidly fluctuating tide of hormones would set its sights on the nearest target. She was Irathient. What little she knew about her race indicated that she was going into the first sexual peak of adulthood. He should have known, and he should have done something about it, introduced her to more people, sent her away, anything that would have prevented this feeling.
She slammed the door behind her, finding small satisfaction in the crack of wood against the frame. He wasn't her father, damn it. There was no instinctive biological repulsion to kept her from viewing him as a viable mate. That's how it worked with humans, wasn't it? Or maybe it was a social development that made it some kind of internalized taboo. Either way, neither seemed to apply to this specific person.
When she dropped down into her nest of blankets, she pushed away the sight of him whispering up into the woman's ear, lips bumping against the gemstone that was suspended from her lobe. The sound of his desire laden chuckle had vibrated through her center, setting her pulse to throbbing. She squeezed her eyes shut against the memory.
Unfortunately, the images continued to play behind her eyelids, morphing into a darkly lit bedroom scene. All she could think about were Nolan's lips pressing hungrily into the soft white flesh of his new companion's perfumed neck, such a contrast to her own ruddy complexion. She could feel his big hands grabbing at the woman desperately, peeling off the layers of clothing until nothing was left between them but a faint sheen of sweat. She was panting as she unlaced the placket at the top of her trousers, palm resting gently on her lower abdomen before her hand dipped lower.
She resented this arousal that buffeted her from every direction, mostly because the focus of it was a man who would balk at the idea of bedding her. She'd seen animals rutting in the woods, and a few drunken louts, grunting against a wall with their pants around their ankles as they took their pleasure with the nearest willing female under the cover of night. Humans were not nearly as discreet as they imagined.
She'd often wondered whether or not sex was worth all the trouble many went through to get it. But now, when she thought about his frantically grinding hips and the sweaty tangle of limbs, she felt a gentle ache pulsing through her body, a physiological reaction that had never really been there before. The persistent need between her thighs set her face to burning as her fingers slipped into the wet heat, her legs twitching as she found the source of the electricity zipping through her in the dark. The breath caught in her throat, a moan escaping through clenched teeth. She let the fantasy envelop her.
Nolan's face materialized behind her closed eyes, his head dropping down low at her breast, phantom touches skimming across her body as her thundering pulse crested in a heart stopping crescendo. The images became too clear, colors bursting in her skull as she arched her back involuntarily. Her eyes snapped open in horror, graceful fingers withdrawing abruptly from the slick folds. She could feel her pulse skittering at her throat, aftershocks fluttering between her legs. She caught her shaky breath and squeezed her eyes shut. It couldn't be like this. He'd never looked at her that way, and he never would.
With the rush of endorphins came a certain about of clarity. She couldn't be around him feeling this way. She contemplated making a run for it, snatching his carefully concealed money belt even as the tears dried on her cheeks and slipping out unnoticed. The idea was just beginning to gain a real shape when the door flew open, a single beam of light cutting across the room.
Her eyes narrowed, adjusting to the light as she watched Nolan stumble into their quarters. He was half asleep, smelling like cheap perfume and even cheaper liquor. Her plan fell apart as he collapsed onto the bed, failing to unbuckle the money belt or even kick off his boots. She lay as still as possible, waiting till his breathing evened out into sawing snores before she crept out from under her blankets on the floor.
Inching toward the bed, she intended to use her dagger to cut the belt off of him. But he caught her, eyes fluttering open at the sound of her feet shuffling across the hardwood. Quickly, she hid the weapon, eyes wide with panic. She'd seen Nolan react swiftly and violently to those threatening his life, and her heart pounded as she imagined the hot lead of bullets ripping through her skin.
Nothing happened, except for Nolan looking at her rather strangely as she stood frozen like a statue, sleep still pulling at the corners of his mouth. "What's wrong, kiddo? Bad dream?"
She was breathing heavily, quite like she did when she had nightmares. She didn't know her nightly terrors were still as obvious as they'd always been. He certainly hadn't said anything to her about them in months, but now he was lifting the blanket draped over him, gesturing for her to join him in the bed, to find safety from bad dreams in his embrace. Her legs moved forward, even as her brain screamed at her to stop, and she was under the warm blanket in a matter of seconds.
He was solid against her back, and so damn warm. Clearly still a bit inebriated, he began to snore again almost immediately, and Irisa turned to face him. His hair was sticking up at odd angles, like someone had ran their fingers through it, tugging at it. Her own fingers itched to feel the strands slipping against the sensitive skin. She tucked them under her arms protectively, quivering in protest.
But it didn't stop her from scooting closer to him, nuzzling into his chest and breathing deeply. She could smell the woman on him, not just the cheap perfume, but her. Everyone had a different scent, sweat and pheromones producing a unique chemistry. All of Irisa's already heightened senses were sharpened, and her nose was keenly aware of every chemical compound. She could easily sift through the pleasantly earthy and sometimes sweaty tones of Nolan, picking out any stray aromas. It's how she knew he'd done more with his mouth than kissing. It intrigued and angered her at the same time, blood rushing through her as her heart began to pound again. The very idea that someone might lavish such attention on that apex of desire made her press her thighs together, a shudder of anticipation running through her.
Nolan shifted against her, one arm slipping across her midsection and pulling her close. She felt safe and vulnerable at the same time, the invisible shield she kept buzzing around her body at all times dropping only like it did with him. It would be so easy to turn to him, lay gentle kisses along his collarbone until he awoke. He would be shocked at first, but Irisa believed that shock would quickly turn into acquiescence. The prospect was more than tempting, but something stopped her. She knew for humans sexual relationships complicated things, romantic feelings often developed, giving rise to jealousy and anger. There was nothing in this world that would make her give up Nolan's companionship, she realized, not even the overwhelming ebb and flow of sexual desire. It was simply biological and it would subside, she kept telling herself.
She couldn't leave him, and she wasn't going to give into this lust that permeated all of her cells. That left only one option really. She had to do what Nolan did and find someone willing to sate her needs for a handful of coins. It shouldn't be too hard. She'd ask Nolan about the logistics of such a transaction in the morning.
She fell asleep in his arms, finally able to relax once she had a plan in place. Her anxiety floated away like wheat chaff on a windy day, leaving her limp in his arms, dreaming of the most inappropriate things.