Natsu

It was hot.

It hurts.

Those two things are an always. It is never not hot. I am never not hurt.

First it was the fire and the house. Mom and Dad weren't waking up and Zeref- I couldn't find Zeref through the fire and black smoke.

There was darkness after that, but no pain. It was just empty.

But then the pain was back, shaking through me from fingers to toes to nose.

There were black flames this time, running over my skin leaving dark marks like the tribal tattoos of our village. They swirled from my neck, down my left arm and across my chest.

Zeref was there. He was smiling, but it wasn't his normal one. This one had sadness and pain. Pain like mine whenever the fire touched me.

I had tried to figure out what was going on, to see why my big brother was so unhappy, but it was hard. Everything hurt and it made me mad.

And when I got mad the black flames came back. They stung against my skin and destroyed everything they touched.

Zeref didn't smile after that.

And then I was alone. It was dark again, but this was the darkness of night in the wilderness, the chirping of crickets and evening call of birds sounding through the air. There were my tears too. Hunger rumbling my tummy as i grew scared. I loved Zeref, trusted my big brother. He wasn't there when the fire happened. I wasn't able to wake mom and dad. And then I was hurt. Nothing was okay.

The birds and crickets grew silent as the ground under me rumbled like a beastie was growling. The echoes of heavy footsteps caused me to lift my head, eyes puffy and sight blurry from my tears. There was a beastie out there, hidden in the shadows. Fear had me shaking and then there was pain again, black flames running up my arms, scorching my skin as i tried to scoot away. The monster poked its head to where I could see it. It looked like a giant lizard with horns, black smoke swirling around it as sharp teeth glinted in weak moonlight.

"Why do you trembled hatchling?" a voice called out, low and rumbling. My back hit a tree and the fire seemed to spread to the grass around me, the heat searing. More panic filled me as the beast approached, large and lumbering like a…

"Dragon," I warbled out, pain lacing the word.

And then the fire was gone, sucked into the dragon's mouth as if it were air.

"I am a Dragon, and you are no ordinary hatchling little one," the rumbled tone sounded surprised. "Those were some impressive Demon flames. Where did you learn old magic like that?"

"I-I don't know any magic," I stuttered out. I should be being eaten right now. I mean the Dragon is huge!

"How interesting, the Dragon rumbled before being covered in bright flames. A scream bubbled out of me, fear that the black fire that he had breathed in had hurt him. But once the flames went away a man stood in his place, a large fur cloak draped over his shoulder with wild red hair that reminded me of the flames he appeared from. "My name it Igneel, and I would like to help you."

"You can't help me," i shook my head as the man came near. "I'm not worth saving! Zeref told me that!" my heart hurt, remembering my big brother's hard look and cold words before dropping me off in this forest. He brought me back, he said, but I wasn't worth the magic cost.

I was useless.

"I do not believe he knows what he's talking about," the man laughed, stepping closer again. "You look hungry, and I have plenty of food." My stomach growled at his words but i did my best to push further into the tree, hard bark scraping against my skin.

"Dragons eat people."

"Some Dragons do, you're right. I've never had the taste for people." the Dragon man crouched down in front of me. He had tan skin like dad but happy eyes like mom. New tears began spilling as I thought about my parents. Zeref said it was my fault they were dead. I was the reason they would never wake up.

"My parents are gone," my mouth made words without permission and they wobbled just like me.

"If you let me, hatchling, I'll take care of you," the Dragon man Igneel offered me his hand and I took it slowly. I was hungry and alone. I didn't deserve to be saved. If the Dragon decided to eat me then that would be okay. Then I wouldn't be a burden to anyone. The Dragon man smiled wide, showing off sharp teeth. He scooped me up easily, a laugh rumbling through him as the fire came back, spreading across his skin as he grew bigger and bigger, his hand turning into a giant claw.

I was too busy being interested in the change to be scared again. He rumbled a warning of 'hold on' before we were in the air, flying above the trees and unfamiliar towns. Excited yells left me as the Dragon flew faster and faster, my fear and sadness being left behind for the moment.

My time with Igneel had been amazing, and short lived. He taught me Dragon magic, fire magic to be exact. I was never able to control the black flames, every time I tried they burned me in a way the magic Igneel taught me never did. I learned how to transform into a Dragon, to eat fire just like he did.

Igneel taught me my letters, how to read and write and interact with other Wizards as well as regular people that weren't gifted with magic. He quickly became my father, taking an interest in me in a way my own family never had. Zeref had been the oldest, the favorite. Zeref was gifted with all sorts of magic knowledge. I was the little nuisance. Igneel tried to keep the happy memories of my family alive for me, but it was hard after everything I'd been through.

When I was old enough to begin transforming into a Dragon myself Igneel felt the need to have quite a few embarrassing talks about mating.

I ignored just about everything he said.

And then one day Igneel was called away, something urgent and dangerous that I wasn't allowed to help with. So he left me in the hoard to handle business, promises that he would return said with conviction before he was gone. He was absent for months, years, before worry started seeping in. I was finally an adult by human years, but still a child in the eyes of Wizards and Dragons alike. So I sought out the assistance of a Magic Guild, A place filled with powerful people that might be able to help.

I had stumbled upon Fairy Tail on accident. They were a new guild founded in the heart of Igneel's territory. They took pity on me, allowing me to join and promised help.

That's when I met her, Layla Ashley, a Celestial Wizard renowned for her care and compassion for the spirits she contracted. Fifty years worth of friendship grew between us, but my worry for Igneel's safety never abated. I traveled back to the hoard often, checking for signs of my wayward father. Leaving notes in a tattered leather bound journal in case he returned while I was away.

And that's when Zeref returned. By then he had made a rather big name for himself, creating demons that were overall unpleasant, constantly terrorizing people and were just generally awful. They did horrible things in his name. He had done horrible things himself.

Fairy Tail, for better or worse, was a place of second chances. A place of redemption. After grudging approval from me they allowed the Dark Wizard to join on a trial basis. Everything seemed to be going so well, everyone was getting along, there were no horrible happenstances.

And then Layla fell in love.

Then the world ended.

Everything was stripped away from me once again, magic burning its way out of me until I was cold. Very few had escaped the Celestial Spirit King's wraith, those who hadn't were turned into large Lacrima crystals, scattered across the world. The King also took the memory of magic from common folk. He left us with our long lives, to punish us for not being able to stop the evil Zeref had wrought.

And boy had he wrought it.

Zeref had abused everyone's trust. He had taught Layla how to harness her Celestial magic to open gates for travel, then slipped through one. Before anyone had realized what he had done Zeref had taken control of the Spirit King, using the man to kill many innocents. Lives were lost in the Celestial Realm as well as on Earthland. When the King was finally able to wretch his freedom from my brother he lashed out.

The burden fell heavily upon Layla.

And then she was gone too, leaving in the dead of the night after weeks of silent weeping, mourning for the friends lost and trapped. Mourning for the loss of magic for everyone. Mourning for her Spirits that she would never get to meet again. There were so few of us left in the guild not trapped in magic crystal. Happy, Levy, Gray, Mira, Master Makarov and Cana. There were few in the world not trapped, the royal family had managed to escape lacrima, as did a few members of Sabertooth and Mermaid Heel.

The world quickly became a vast and empty space.

I quickly lost interest in the adventure that once called for me, the burning in my blood to fight and train. To find my father.

Zeref had ruined everything.

And if i ever get the chance I'll make him pay for hurting my dearest friend and trying to destroy the world.

"Natsu," Levy's voice called from the doorway of the tiny house Happy and I shared on the outskirts of Magnolia, on the border of Igneel's land and close to a hoard I hadn't visited in years,"are you here?"

"Where else would he be?" Gray scoffed, the sound of his shoes scuffing against the wood floors signaling he had entered. "Hey hot-head, Master thinks it would be a good idea to go to the University this year."

"What good could that do?" I huffed and Happy meowed from my back, his words no longer translating to us as they once had. It was odd how we could keep certain magical parts of us, like Gray's aversion to clothes and immunity to most chilly temperatures and my sense of hearing and smell, but Happy couldn't talk. The blue cat stretched, little claws digging into my shoulders and I huffed.

"Cana and Mira miss you, and well it would keep you out of trouble," Levy offered lamely from her spot still firmly knew the importance of not overstepping boundaries into a Dragons den. Something Gray blatantly ignores on a good day. More scuffling steps and the smell of frost alerted me to the fact that Gray was closer. I looked over my shoulder to see Gray scanning the photos pinned to my wall. Our friend's smiling faces gazing back at him.

"He hasn't gotten in trouble in a while. That's the problem," Gray sighed, slanting his beady eyes at me. "Master's worried about you, figured you'd be easier to watch if you're close by."

"If it'll keep the old man off my back," I sighed before standing, stretching out sore limbs.

"I'm sure it won't hurt," Levy chirped, a fragile smile on her face. She had been closest to Layla. 214 years and she was still hurting over her friend's disappearance.

Hurting over the punishment Layla was living out alone.

We all are.