Because I Want You
part two
Al woke up the next morning curled up in his bed. He sleepily lifted his head and looked at the sunlight coming in his window. The night before came back to him in a flash and as his stomach turned, he buried his face back in the pillows. It was true that he had always wanted to hear Ed say those words, but not when he was drunk. And why had his brother been drinking in the first place? It was so unlike him. For all Al knew, Ed could have been talking about someone else and not him. Someone ... ... Al shut his eyes tightly to try to stop any tears from falling, and clutched his pillow a bit tighter. He never really wanted it to come to something like this, he didn't want to have to face the truth or whatever it was that he was avoiding. He was almost happy not knowing how his brother felt about him. Almost happy ... but still. He could have just kept on living in denial, pretending everything was okay, and that he was normal. But not now.
Al jumped as he heard a knock on his bedroom door. It was really soft, and he almost wondered if he had imagined it, when he heard another weak one. Ed's voice came through the door but it was barely audible. "Al ... Alphonse ... are you awake?"
Al heard an emotion in Ed's voice that he hadn't heard in a long time. His brother was actually sounding sorry for once. Al frowned anyway, sitting up and glaring at the door. "... Yeah, I'm up."
Ed tried to turn the handle and found it wouldn't open. "Can I come in ... please?"
"Why, Brother? Do you plan to--"
"Al!" Ed cut him off, yelling through the door. Al heard somewhat of a thunk against the door, meaning Ed was leaning into it. The younger alchemist sighed, knowing his brother wasn't in the mood for snappy sarcastic remarks right now. Al really knew that from the sound in his voice earlier. He got up and slowly went to unlock the door. Ed pushed open the door slightly, sliding in before Al got any ideas about shutting it again.
Al backed up a bit, but held his brother's gaze. "If you're here to talk about last night, you mightaswell leave now, because there's nothing for you to explain." Ed just stared as Al backed away even further from him. "You didn't mean what you said, so we can just leave it at that. I'm sure you didn't mean to say ... it to me ... anyway ..." Al's once confident voice dropped off softly towards the end.
"Say it? Say what? Al, damnit. I can hardly remember anything about last night. I can't remember anything I said or really did apart from ..."
"... you don't even remember what you said to me?! That's just great, Edward." Al sat back down on his bed and put his head in his hands.
There was a heavy sort of silence for awhile before Ed spoke up again. "I remember kissing you, but that's all." More awkward moments of silence passed. "And ... and I just wanted to apologize, Al, I know it was wrong, and I know you probably hated it and I'm really sorry."
Al still didn't speak and instead turned bright red. No, he hadn't exactly hated his brother's kiss at all. He had actually somewhat liked it. But still, he was just drunk so it didn't mean anything, therefore ...
"Al?"
Ed's voice disrupted his continuous thoughts. "Uh ... oh. It's not that ..."
"I'm sure it was gross and I never-- wait. What?"
The younger alchemist's anger and confusion melted simply into nervousness and embarassment now. Ed noticed him fiddling with the bottom of his shirt, a nervous habit Al had since he was a kid, one that Ed secretly loved. It was just another quirk about Al that only he really knew, another thing that just made him more endearing. Ed waited patiently for his brother to gather his thoughts and speak, instead of coaxing him to talk.
After a deep sigh, Al finally let it all spill out. "Last night, you said you loved me more than anyone and kissed me. And I wouldn't have minded ... I actually would have been happy ... but you were drunk ... I mean ... for all I know you could have been thinking you were talking to the other Alfons ..."
"I said ... and you wouldn't mind? And ... oh." Ed let this sink in before trying to speak again. "If I said that ... no. I wasn't thinking of Alfons. I was thinking of you because I have wanted to say that to you for a long time. I just didn't because I didn't believe you felt the same way, and I didn't want to hurt you and I didn't want to ruin what we have now, Al. Because if you left me I just don't know ... I don't--"
"Brother, I would never leave you. I can't. You know that." Al finally got up and went across the room, wrapping his arms around his brother without hesitation. It was only a few moments before he felt Ed's arms around him as well and he snuggled more into his brother. Al spoke, his voice muffled against his brother, but Ed was pretty sure he heard it. "I love you, Brother."
Placing a soft kiss on the top of Al's head, he smiled and breathed in that familiar sweet scent of his brother's strawberry blonde hair.
"I love you too, Al."
--
-Omake-
Al: -bonks Ed on the head after that-
Ed: Ouch! What was that for?
Al: You're not going anywhere near alcohol again!
Ed: ...
Al: I'm serious.
Ed: ... What if you come with me next time?
Al: EDWARD!
Ed: I was kidding, really!