Title: Love is a Lie

Full Summary: Sango, an independent feminist, has to return home to Tokyo for her best friend Kagome's wedding. However, everyone there is anxious to meet the long-talked-about boyfriend whom Sango is supposed to be seeing. Desperate to keep up with her lie, she hires Miroku, a charming date professional, to be her escort to the wedding and pose as her boyfriend. Alternate Universe

As her laptop slowly booted up, the tension building up in Sango's stomach started to ease.

"I just hope I can make this work," she worried. "But this guy better be one hell of an actor because if they find out he's not my real boyfriend then I'm roasting his ass for it."

When her computer finally finished loading up, Sango slid her finger across the mouse square and clicked on the Internet Explorer icon. Instantly, the window popped up and she typed in the website.

"I feel like I'm getting a mail-order bride or something," she muttered under her breath, remembering how popular that used to be for desperate men to order their wives through the mail.

The home page of the site looked very profession and clean-cut and even Sango had to give them points for how well it was laid out. She clicked the "online form" choice that it gave and was redirected to a long page with question after question of things they needed to know about your specific escort. Sango's eyes widened in surprise as she scrolled down farther… and farther… and even farther until she finally reached the end.

"This thing has to be like twenty-five pages!" she thought in amazement. "At least… they're thorough."

So she started with the very first group of questions. They were asking personal information like name, phone number, and credit card number. She filled this section out rather quickly and continued onto the next part. This continued part was all questions about crimes or illegal actions. To every one of these questions, she clicked the "no" checkbox. The third section was full of more basic things like where and when the employee would be needed, male or female, ect. Feeling very bored and a little bit annoyed, Sango filled this out as well. Although she did realize that two weeks seemed like an awful long time for hiring an escort. Technically, she should only need him one day: the wedding day. But Sango was determined to make their "relationship" look legit. She yawned a little and rested head on one hand while she lazily typed with the other.

"I hope they don't use the entire shit load of pages for just this stuff," thought Sango disdainfully.

Finally, she reached the "specifications" section. She skimmed it over before beginning. To make a long story short, they were basically asking "what is your ideal man?"

They began with outward appearance. They asked for everything from age to astrological sign. Sango was suddenly very glad that her plane was delayed for almost an hour, because she guessed that it might take half an hour just to finish everything on the form.

A bit taken back at the extreme detail, Sango took a moment to fully comprehend what she was reading. She filled in the following categories likes so:

Height: 6'1" (Sango was a tall woman who wanted an even taller man to accompany her)
Weight: 160 or under
Age: 25-29 (She wanted a man near her age, but not quite thirty. Thirty made him sound too old for her)
Hair color: Dark
Eye color: Blue
Hair length: any
Body type: athletic

Getting slightly more interested in filling this out, Sango let a smile creep across her face. It was like picking out her own special Ken doll! Unfortunately, the next couple questions weren't quite as fun as the first. They all had simpler answers unlike before.

Glasses: none
Body piercings: none
Tattoos: None
Freckles: None
Ethnicity: Any
Religion: Any
Astrological sign: Any

However, the next part was even more fun because they finally started asking about the personality of the man. There must have been over fifty different characteristics to chose from, each with a checkbox next to it. It was no wonder why the form was so long. Sango read down the list and clicked every trait that looked interesting.

Friendly
Outgoing
Funny
Smart
Athletic
Good conversationalist
Submissive
Resourceful
Good cook
Witty
Stylish
Clean
Manly
Compassionate

One of the choices was "experienced" which Sango chose at first, assuming that it mean he was experienced with this escort job. It wasn't until a few moments later that she understood they could be meaning experienced in bed and she hastily took it off her list. She read over the choices twice just to make sure she picked every one she wanted and then continued onto the next page. The rest of the form was a contract stating that Welling's Escort Service was not liable for any accidents, injuries, or problems that might occur with the escort blah blah blah. The only thing different from any ordinary waver was that it added that "the customer is obligated to a certain level of secrecy, by avoiding mass distribution of Welling information or promoting it to a large number of people."

"That's strange," noted Sango quietly. "Why would they ask for it to be mostly secret? I would think they'd make a lot of money if they advertised themselves more."

It took a moment, but Sango managed to figure it out. The nature of the business is selling human company, probably in many different ways including sex. It could easily be mistaken (or found out) as like a professional prostitute distributor. So it truly was better that the company kept a low profile and just traveled around by word of mouth. That way, it was probably less likely to be investigated by the government. And for some reason, Sango didn't mind this at all. In fact, she took it as a blessing. It made her feel like these people understood the concept of a secret, and that was the kind of person she needed to help her right then.

At the end of the contract, Sango checked the box next to the "I accept these terms" and pressed enter. For a few moments, the window was blank as it processed and stored the information on the website. When it finally finished, a window popped up saying "Thank you for hiring from Welling's Escort Service. We will process your order form and contact you as soon as possible with escort options."

With a heavy sigh, Sango closed her laptop and powered it down. The deed was done and now all she needed to do was to wait for a response, and she estimated that it would take a few days to get a call. She thought the phone interview was a little excessive but through that, she would be able to determine if the guy was a complete moron or not. Her tensed muscles unwound once the hardest parts were over, and she was glad that the ordering process was virtually painless. She had half expected them to ask her all these things over the phone, making her feel like the person renting porn from the video store where they read out the name of the movie as they ring it up and alert everyone within earshot that you're renting something dirty.

She carefully returned the laptop to its cushioned bag and crossed her legs as she peered around the spacious room. She wasn't exactly sure when her flight was supposed to leave and it was so dark out that even though it had stopped raining, you couldn't tell if there were still clouds out. Expected to be there for another thirty minutes or so, Sango pulled out her iPod and listened to music while keeping an eye on the flight attendant incase she was trying to say something having to do with the flight.

As much as she tried to keep her eyes open, though, Sango was drifting off into sleep. It was almost midnight by that time and Sango was used to early mornings. So in turn, she was also used to early bed times. As she started to nod off, she tried to keep herself awake any way she could like cranking up the volume on her iPod, taking a short little walk, and even going to the women's bathroom to pat her neck with cold water (because splashing her face would ruin her make up once again). As she looked up into the mirror with sleepy eyes, she froze for a moment to observe her face. Shallow wrinkles had just begun to appear in the corners of the eyes and mouth, making her look much older than she ever remembered looking.

"I'm starting to look like my mother," she mumbled hoarsely. She played with her face a bit, stretching the skin around her eyes (making her look even more Japanese than she already did) and smoothing back the skin around her lips. "How did the years sneak up on me?"

It was then that she heard a faint voice over an intercom announcing that flight 368 to Tokyo was clear for take off. Wasting no time to get back, Sango didn't even remember to fix her tousled hair before she left. She returned to the gate then promptly picked up her briefcase and laptop carrier and got in line for the attendant to take her ticket.

The whole flight to Tokyo took sixteen hours (including one stop to change planes in some obscure airport) and Sango tried to sleep most of the time, hoping that keeping to a certain schedule would help soften the inevitable jet lag. Japan was eight hours behind Los Angeles and they left around one AM for a sixteen hour flight, making it just around nine AM that she arrived. Of course, Sango's attempt at getting some good sleep was all in vain because she was jarred from her light sleep whenever the plane hit even the slightest turbulence or someone was making too much noise. The whole trip, she was caught between half asleep and awake. Meaning that when she finally arrived in Japan, she was not only very disoriented and disgruntled, but she barely even remembered where she was because she wasn't conscious enough to think straight. When she shook her head sharply to wake herself up, she looked to her watch but it was still on California time and she found it no help. She had to wait until she stepped in the actual airport to see a correct clock.

"Eleven twenty-seven," she repeated sleepily when she found the clock on Tokyo time. Too tired to synchronize her watch with the right time, she just stumbled on ahead to baggage claim.

She waited patiently at the merry-go-round of bags, noticing that most of the bags and suitcases were well worn and almost looked dirty. They seemed to have been through a lot of trips and they made Sango's prim, leather suitcase look like art in comparison. Quickly snatching it up as it came around, Sango pulled up the handle and rolled it out of the airport. When she reached the loading and unloading zones, she expected to maybe see a cab she could catch or a driver with her name on a card. Instead, there was none other than Kagome leaning against a car a ways down the line. Sango's face burst into a smile when she saw her and called out her name to get her attention. Instantly, Kagome looked over and screamed. Not just squealed, but screamed at the top of her lungs. Sango winced but kept scurrying over to her at the same quick pace with her suitcase trailing behind her. Kagome, on the other hand, was sprinting her way and when they met each other, she jumped and threw herself at Sango, wrapping her legs around her middle. Kagome never had much modesty in a skirt and it didn't surprise Sango when she realized that the younger girl was wearing a flowy knee-length skirt, probably exposing herself to the south side of the airport.

"I missed you!" she exclaimed. Sango, who was still holding all her luggage, could do nothing to hug back. Slightly embarrassed, she set her friend and her things down and hugged her again with a little less passion than Kagome.

"I'm so glad to see you," said Sango sincerely. Kagome had already popped and trunk of her tiny car and started helping Sango with her bags.

"I couldn't wait to see you so I decided I'd pick you up."

"You didn't have to do that. I could have ordered a taxi to take me," replied Sango as they loaded the last bag into the trunk.

"Ugh, not only would that be really rude, but I was too excited to wait anymore than I had to."

"Well thank you."

They piled in Kagome's car and took off down the road. The trip from the airport to the Taijiyas' had to have been over an hour but there was hardly a moment of silence during the car ride. It made Sango feel like a teenager again, just gabbing with her best friend. She hadn't realized how much she missed Kagome. They talked about the wedding, Inuyasha, the proposal, and everything else of the like.

Then, Kagome turned to Sango for a second and asked, "So where's that boyfriend of yours?"

Sango had expected this and was prepared with her excuse. She serenely explained, "He couldn't get out of work for another few days. He'll be here soon, though."

"Fantastic! I'm so excited to meet him! What's his name again?"

"Damn it. I have to come up with a name now. What name, what name?" she thought frantically.

Before she had the chance to answer, Inuyasha came to her rescue. Out of no where, a flash of red and white crossed their vision and Inuyasha appeared on the car hood. Kagome screamed and swerved, knocking her fiancé off balance and sending him flying onto the sidewalk. The car's brakes screeched with a sudden stop and Kagome leaped out of the car to go to Inuyasha. Sango let out the breath she'd been holding and brushed her bangs out of her eyes just for them to fall back into place again.

"Safe for now," she whispered. She glanced over at Inuyasha, who had already say up and started fixing his red jacket and yelling at Kagome for trying to kill him. Grabbing a chunk of shock-white hair, Kagome shouted right back and the whole thing turned into a screaming war. Sango rolled her eyes, knowing that the whole thing would end with Kagome stomping away, fuming, and Inuyasha crossing his arms and holding his nose high in the air like he had done nothing wrong. It always did, even when they were in high school. They were always so predictable. It really was no wonder that it took them ten years of dating to finally get married. They could be impossible at times, but they were so in love with each other.

Kagome gave him one more strong tug on his hair and then stormed back to the car with a look of murder on her face. When she climbed back in her car, growling quietly, Sango was careful not to say a word until Kagome spoke first. However, she didn't speak before they reached Sango's childhood home. Just the sight of it made Sango's stomach churn uncomfortably. Then when Kagome squealed with excitement (at what, Sango wasn't entirely sure) they pulled into the short driveway in front of the Taijiya house.

Kagome turned to the older woman and smiled warmly, saying, "Isn't it nice to be back home? So many fond memories. Even I have great memories from this place."

Yes, Sango had memories. Obviously, though, she wasn't thinking of the fond ones at that moment. The Higurashi shrine held happy recollections for her, but not so much this place. She wordlessly stood out of the car and followed Kagome to the trunk. Not a moment later, Kohaku came tearing out of the front door to meet Sango. When Sango had left for the states, Kohaku had only been sixteen. Now, she was greeted by a much older, much manlier brother. And when she saw him, she dropped her bags and went to hug him. They both laughed and squeezed each other so tight they could barely breathe, and Sango felt happier in that moment than she'd felt in a long, long time. She smiled nostalgically while they embraced and felt overjoyed that she had decided to come back for a while.

They talked a bit, noticing each other's changed appearances, and chatted like siblings do about nothing in particular.

"Sango, you look like you're going to a business meeting," he said laughing. She smiled.

"My work keeps me dressing sharp all the time. It feels weird not wearing work clothes all the time now," she answered. "But look at you! You're already taller than me; not something I'm used to. I like that you kept your hair the same."

"Thanks. Hey, come on in. Mom and dad have been waiting for you too," he said impatiently. While slightly resisting at first, Sango followed her brother slowly into the house and totally forgot about Kagome, who was lugging in all three of Sango's bags.

"A little help?" she called from the car. When Sango and Kohaku had already gone in side, she gave an aggravated growl and awkwardly tried to walk to the front door.

"Sango!" said Mrs. Taijiya, with her arms stretched out to receive her daughter. Sango's mother was a loving woman with enough care and concern to fill the whole world of grumpy people up with love. Sometimes, though, she was so sweet you felt like you were choking. Usually she was the one ragging on Sango about her lack of love life.

"Nice to see you, mom," Sango said with a small smile. Unlike her previous two welcomes, this one wasn't as bursting with excitement and it was a little bit anti-climactic, in fact. The hug was half-hearted and the words were sparse, leaving Sango to feel like her parents weren't exactly overjoyed to have her home again. They probably remembered as much as she did how difficult things sometimes had been.

"It's been way too long, dear," her mom said, patting her arm affectionately. Then she mentioned, "Your father is in the kitchen. I'm sure he'd like to hear that you've arrived."

"Alright. I'll go see him," she agreed. She secretly hoped that her father had left the kitchen, because Sango was ready to welcome any sort of an excuse to prolong the inevitable.

He was a slightly stern looking man with a bearded face and chocolate brown hair like Sango and Kohaku. With his increasing age, his face began to look more and more like he was frowning all the time. She supposed that the years must have been unkind to him and made him look gruffer and coarser than he truly was.

When she finally gathered up enough courage to slide open the door to the kitchen, she was surprised to see her father bending down in front of the partially opened oven as he peered intently at whatever was inside. Mrs. Taijiya was usually the one to cook anything for the family and it was odd to see her father having anything to do with preparing food. Curious as to what he was doing, Sango tapped him on the back lightly and he instantly reacted. He snapped into an upright position and spun around like a burglar had just tapped him instead of his daughter. Just as he was about to yell something in his surprise, he stopped short and his features softened slightly when he understood who it was.

"Sango. Didn't think you'd be able to make it," he said, making it sound like he thought she'd chicken out.

"Nope, I made it. I just got in from my flight an hour or so ago," answered Sango. "What are you doing standing in front of the oven?"

"I... um... nothing," he stuttered and then tried to switch to a different subject. "Where are your bags? Aren't you staying for a few weeks? Or are you planning to wear that suit everyday?"

Sango gasped and remembered that she'd left Kagome outside with her stuff. It might have only been three bags, but they were three very heavy bags. She rushed out of the kitchen and stopped in the living room where Kagome sat panting and chatting with Sango's mother politely. As Sango entered she received a quick glare from Kagome.

"Do you bring bricks on your trips or what?" hissed Kagome.

"Sorry," muttered Sango and furrowed her eyebrows together to show Kagome that she really did feel bad about it.

"Well, it gave me a good work out, if nothing else. I seriously wonder how you manage to move those things!"

Sango chuckled and Kagome's furry dissolved into good-natured teasing. That was always one plus about Kagome, she was too moody sometimes to stay mad for very long. Next, Sango went on to tell her that she practiced martial arts while she lived in California just like she did when she was living in Japan.

"They can DO martial arts in America? Seriously?" she asked incredulously.

"Martial arts are an eastern practice, but people in the west love it too. Although, I have to admit that the Americans will never be able to do it like the east does it," said Sango with a smug smile.

"Because we're hardcore!" Kagome said, screaming the "hardcore" and pretending to flex her muscles. Sango erupted into laughter, finding it humorous that Kagome, a complete powder puff, would say something like that. Sango's mother, who had been sitting silently this whole time, was less than amused and announced that she was going to go help Mr. Taijiya in the kitchen.

While Kagome and Sango were doubling over with laughter, Kohaku came in from another room and alerted them that Sango's room was ready for her to move her things into.

"My old room?" she asked unsurely. "It hasn't turned into a sewing room or anything?"

"No, mom and dad were having me stay in there for a while and I sort of... it got a little messy," Kohaku confessed. "I was just staying until you got here so I'm going back to my own apartment now."

"No, no! Can't you ...stay?" Sango begged, grabbing him by the arm. Kohaku laughed, knowing exactly why she was pleading with him.

"Sango, mom and dad aren't going to kill you, or tell you that you fail at life. They're different. You'll see," he assured her, patting her shoulder.

"Mom and dad are so old that they will never change. Once you reach that age limit then they don't learn new things, they just start forgetting old things."

"Goodbye, Sango."

She whimpered as Kohaku slung a small bag over his shoulder and strutted out. Kagome stood up and took Sango's hand saying, "Let's get you in you're room. I bet you're exhausted."

Truthfully, she hadn't been feeling tired at all, what with all the adrenaline and excitement she'd been experiencing ever since she got out of the airport. However, the second that sleep was mentioned, Sango's limbs felt like lead and her eyes were barely staying open. She sleepily agreed and Kagome laughed and picked up Sango's briefcase and laptop.

"You get the heaviest thing," she said, totally unashamed. Sango nodded before pulling up the handle to roll the bag out. Kagome's eyes shot open and she cried, "You can roll that thing?"

Once everyone was gone and Sango was alone in her room, she flopped on her old queen sized bed fully clothed and groaned in happiness.

"Sleep... sleep," she rambled. Not bothering to change out of her suit, she crawled underneath the covers of her bed, still decorated like it was in high school. When glorious sleep finally took her, she rested with a smile on her face.

In her deep and dreamless sleep, Sango felt like for the first time in weeks that she wasn't being rushed or stressed. Things were slow, smooth and she was able to sleep for the rest of the day.

Then…

It couldn't have been later than 5 o'clock in the morning when her mother burst in the door wearing her nightgown and holding Sango's cell phone in her hand as it rang with its shrill ring tone. Caught completely off guard, Sango awoke with a start and fell off the bed with a loud "thud."

"Sango? Is this yours?" asked Mrs. Taijiya with one hand in her ear. Kagome must have let it fall out of the bags earlier. Sango leaped up and snatched it away from her mother and glanced at the caller ID, not really caring who it was because she was planning on ignoring it anyway. The number, however, was an unknown 1-800 call.

"It must be the escort," she thought. "Why is he calling now?"

She shooed her mother out of her room and picked up the phone at the last minute, frantically reciting her name instead of saying hello while still completely disoriented.

"Ms. Taijiya?" a deep male voice said from the other end. Sango sat down on her bed and started fixing her hair as if he could see her, but made herself stop fretting so much.

"Yes, who's this?"

"My name is Miroku Houshi. I work for Welling's Escort Service."

Author's note: There we go, chapter two. We're practically to where the good part begins. Hopefully you guys aren't getting bored already but if you are, then all you have to do is wait for chapter three and thing will get more interesting.

EmeraldBats: Glad you're liking it! Yeah, Sango and Miroku are the BEST.

Setsuna-ka: Thank you so much. For once in a really long time I got a review that seemed like there was thought put init. You made me think I was really doing something right. : )

Demon Exterminator Barbie: No no! lol. She couldn't have got all that done before the flight. But the agency is prompt enough to give her a call the very next day, as you can obviously see. They probably aren't swamped with calls, being kind of underground like they are.

EnchantressRai: I'm trying to make it as funny as I can but the real humor comes in once our dear Miroku is introduced. I'm telling you guys, it get's so much better in later chapters. So if you like it know, I'm really excited to see how much you'll like later stuff.

RedRogue: Wow, I'm impressed that you figured out my inspiration so quickly. Although I really shouldn't be because it's kind of obvious. Anyway, I'm trying really hard to make this thing as original as possible so it's going to be very different from the movie. It wouldn't be worth reading if it was exactly like the movie. It'll be less drama, more comedy. You'll see. I hope you like it. All of you!