Later that night the two demigods ventured up to the temples to talk and watch the sunset over the city in the middle if the camp. Percy seemed unnaturally quiet as he stared at the sky teeming with hues of orange and deep blue. Reyna stared at him. In the evening light, he looked godly; his hair shining and his face basking in the golden rays of the setting sun. Percy caught her eye and gave her a smile—a smile that made her heart beat so fast she was sure it was going to fly out of her chest. She had never felt this way about anyone since Jason…and look where that got her. Reyna mentally scolded herself. You will NOT fall in love with Percy, she chided. He would never want someone like you anyway.
"Annabeth and I used to watch sunsets together," Percy said quietly, shaking Reyna from her thoughts. "She would tell me exactly how sunsets were created, by telling me all about the atmosphere and light waves and—" Percy faltered. A single tear rolled down his cheek. Reyna ached inside. All she wanted to do was to hold him and take away his pain. She looked away; she couldn't bear to see Percy like this.
"You really loved her, didn't you." It wasn't really a question as much as a confirmation, especially because Reyna noticed Percy gazing at the temple of Minerva that the Romans had put up to honor Annabeth's death. Percy tore his eyes away from the temple and settled his gaze on Reyna instead.
"Reyna, I loved her more than I ever loved anyone else. Every part of me loved every part of her. Being the reason behind her smile was the only thing I cared about. And every day I have to live with the guilt of not being able to save her. I wasn't there when she needed me, Reyna. I wasn't there when she died. She needed me and I failed her and she's dead and there's nothing I can do. And it's my fault because I didn't save her." Percy looked away, the tears flowing more freely now. "I was never able to save her when she got hurt, you know that. She always took care of herself and I loved that about her…she was so strong and able to do things on her own," Percy choked. "She could take care of herself. And the one time she couldn't—" He buried his face in his hands. "The one time she couldn't, she DIED, Reyna!"
Reyna's heart ached seeing Percy in so much pain. She leaned over to him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. Percy looked up at her, his eyes brimming with tears.
"Hey," Reyna said gently. She scooted closer to him and draped her cape around his shoulders. "She's probably in Elysium right now rolling her eyes at you, shaking her head and muttering about what a crybaby you are. You know she would expect you to move on, get the camp running again. Being sad is ok, but you can't be sad forever, Perce."
"You don't understand, Reyna," Percy choked out. "I feel so damn guilty doing nothing. I feel just as guilty doing anything relating to stuff we used to do. I feel guilty all the time because I could've prevented her from dying…I could've saved her and I didn't. And she's not here and I can never be with her again. Do you even understand how that feels?!"
"Yeah," Reyna said quietly. "Yeah, I do."
You.
"I hate it," whispered Percy.
"I hate it too," Reyna whispered, almost to herself.
"I mean, how do I explain that to people?!" Percy shouted angrily. "I let her die! How do you explain that, Reyna?!"
Reyna looked at Percy, then let her eyes fall. "How do I explain that being with you is like dying, but less permanent?" she whispered.
She could feel his green eyes boring into her skull. "You what?" Percy asked quietly, yet almost...lovingly.
Reyna kept her eyes downcast. "How...how do I explain that...that being with you...is like dying, but less permanent," she choked out.
"Reyna." A strong hand cupped her chin and lifted her face upwards, forcing her eyes to look straight into his. His green eyes stared quizzically into hers as she tried to break away from his grasp. She broke free and turned her back to him as tears flowed down her cheeks.
"I'm sorry, Percy," she whispered. "I never wanted it to be like this." She started walking down the hill.
"Reyna, wait!" Percy lunged for her and grabbed her arm. "Reyna, talk to me."
Reyna shook his hand off her arm. "I'm sorry, Percy," she said quietly. "But I think you should go."
Percy's hand dangled at his side. "Go?" he asked, hurt. She turned to face him. His green eyes were large and wondering, full of questions. She couldn't bear to look at them anymore. It made everything she thought and felt about him well up inside her and choke her.
"Yes," she answered simply. "Go."
Percy turned away from her. "Where will I go?"
Reyna looked up at the sky, stars only just starting to come out. She heaved a heavy sigh. "I believe your old bunk is free. You may stay here the night."
"What then?" he asked.
Reyna turned to face him. "Do you not have a camp to be running?" she asked, her tone icy. It felt like icicles were stabbing Percy in the heart with every word she said. He stood in front of her, silent, hands jammed in his pockets. Reyna sighed. "Breakfast is at its usual time," she said, quietly but authoritatively. "I will see you off then. Goodnight, Perseus. Sleep well."