August 19, 2006
Fluffer Nickel
If you ever want to see Fluffer Nickel again, you will wash your hair so it is presentable to the rest of the world. He will be returned to you in the Great Hall tomorrow if you have followed the instructions.
He stared at the heavy-duty shampoo/conditioner clutched in his hand. He had to do this. It was for his best friend, his only friend.
He began to wet his hair down in the sink (he refused to do more than the ransom note asked) and squirted a generous amount of the bluish cream into his hand. It's for Fluffy, it's for Fluffy!
He worked the shampoo/conditioner through the clumps of tangle and grease in his black hair as it began to burn his scalp; it felt like acid! Whoever was responsible for this atrocious act would pay dearly.
Finally, he began to rinse the suds from his head and face where it had dripped. They ran down the sink, disappearing in the drain. Quickly drying his head, he stormed out of the dungeons, sweeping up the stairs as quickly as he could while still maintaining the intimidating aura he had built up over the past fifteen years.
This had to be the work of Potter. That idiot boy and stupid Weasley! Oh, when I get my hands on those two…
Yanking open the doors to the Great Hall, and ignoring the stares from both students and teachers (undoubtedly at his newly bouncy and buoyant dark brown hair) he stormed up to the end of the Gryffindor table and slammed his hand down between Potter and Weasley.
They both froze instantly, and turned around, food still hanging off their forks (and out of Weasley's mouth). He could practically see their minds working furiously, trying to find how to escape the almighty wrath of Professor Severus Snape.
"What…have you done with him?" he demanded in a deadly whisper, causing both boys to flinch.
"With who, Professor?" asked the Boy-Who-Would-Be-Destroyed.
"You know perfectly well who!" shouted Snape, making everyone who hadn't already been watching turn away from their food.
"I believe you mean this, Severus," said a calm voice behind him.
Snape spun around to face…Dumbledore? There he was, eyes twinkling, holding Fluffer Nickel.
"You did this?" Snape said in a voice a complete awe.
"Yes, Severus, it was I. And it seems that you have given in to my demands! Jolly good!" Dumbledore said.
"You planned this?" exclaimed Snape, eyes widening.
"Well, with the help of some select staff members who have had complaints about the, err, problem."
"Just give him back to me!" Snape snarled.
He cannot be talking about that, can he? It has to be a pet or something, right? This thought ran through Harry's mind along with most of the student body's.
Dumbledore handed Snape the fuzzy…pink…carebear…
Severus embraced his best-ist friend in the whole, wide world, Fluffer Nickel.
End