Summary: To try it would be crazy. To pull it off would be impossible. There are a hundred reasons it won't work. But Draco Malfoy believes he can rob the wizarding world's greatest fear. Are you in or are you out?

A/N: I NEED A SCRIPT…I am begging anyone who has found one… you will be my hero.

Disclaimer: Ocean's Eleven to George Clayton Johnson and Jack Golden Russell, and Harry Potter characters to J.K. Rowling.

XXXXXXX XXX XXXX

"No. No!" said Jack, "You're not robbing You-Know-Who."

"No," Draco told him with a signature smirk. "We're robbing him."

"Why do this?" Jack asked.

"Why not do this?" Draco replied. Jack shook his head. "Because yesterday I walked out of the joint after losing four years of my life, and you're riding around on a broomstick." Draco paused. "Because the snitch always wins. Play long enough, you never change the stakes. The snitch takes you. Unless, when that perfect chance comes along, you dive hard, then you take the snitch."

"Been practicing this speech, haven't you?" Jack smiled.

"A little bit. Did I rush it? Felt like I rushed it." Draco replied.

"No, it was good, I liked it. The 'riding around on a broom' bit was harsh."

Draco set his glass down on the table. "What do you think Harry will say?"

XXXXXXXXXX XX

"YOU'RE OUTTA YOU'RE GODDAMN MINDS!" yelled Harry. Jack fingered the ironwork on his chair, munching on a chip. They were sitting in the back garden of Harry's Edinburgh mansion. Draco shrugged.

"It's never been done before. Never," Harry continued. "And it never will be done. Whatcha think? You'd stroll up to him, strike up a conversation? 'Yo, Voldie. Gimme your money?' You'd be dead before the words even came outta your mouth."

"Yeah. Yeah, you're right." Draco conceded. "We could never pull this off."

"Never in a million years," ascertained Jack. Blew squinted at them.

"Alright," he said. "Well, I have some couches for you…I'll pop them over as soon as I get the chance." Jack and Draco stood up to leave.

"By the way," called Harry as they were almost to the door. "Just out of curiosity-- how did you possibly conceive you were going to do this?"

"Oh," said Jack, glancing at Draco. "Your dad—"

"Yes," Draco jumped in, "He taught me some curse…the Sedicem one …" These words had a great effect on Harry, because the glass he was holding dropped to the brick floor and shattered.

XXXXXXXX XXX

"Who were you thinking of hitting up?" asked Jack as they made their way back to Draco's car. It was a '76 Mercedes, and quite good for a Muggle car.

"What would we need?" replied Draco, bending to a new low of asking other people's advice.

"You'd need at least a dozen guys doing some sort of combination of cons," Jack made a tuna fish sandwich appear out of thin air with a wave of his wand. "Off the top of my head, I'd say you're looking at a Wronski, a John Doe, a Mrs. Snippet, two Eaters, a house-elf, and not to mention the biggest Stubby Boardman ever."

"Right," Draco turned onto a side street. "Flint."

"Azkaban. Right after you got out."

"Krum," Draco threw out another name.

"Dead," Jack told him unsympathetically.

"No shit. On the job?" Draco replied with equal unconcern.

"Quidditch accident," Jack said with a mouthful of tuna.

"Did you send him flowers?"

"Dated his wife for a bit."

Draco turned a corner. "Good enough," he said. "Who's left?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXX XX

Ron Weasley was watching the most exciting Quidditch game of his life. His team, the Cannons, were winning the match for the first time in a while. Ron was sure this would be the first win of many. He sat back, watching the team he had aspired to play on for many years. Suddenly, a man sat down in the empty seat next to him. Ron smiled.

"I saw you at the hot dog stand," he said. "Nice suit."

Jack shrugged, slapping down a ticket on the arm of his chair. "It's a ticket to Paris. Next week. Are you in?"

"What's the job?" Ron asked.

"I need an answer," Jack answered, munching on a magically appearing bag of salt and vinegar chips. "Are you in?" he repeated.

Ron pocketed the ticket, and reached his hand into Jack's bag to steal a chip. He leaned back against his seat, munching on the chip, and watched the Cannons finally win a game.

XXXXXXXXX XXX X