Well, here's the second and final chapter. In this one, Buffy has changed back into a Slayer with a mystery cure. And the lyrics to SexyBack by Justin Timberlake belong to their respective owners.
It was the next night in a Los Angeles auditioning room. Aaron rose from his seat and crossed the room, Ortega's burning stare never leaving him. He placed his hand on the door knob to open it when the door opened, sending him backwards. Corey Feldman walked in. His clothes were perfect, his hair styled just right, a Coca-Cola bottle full of blood was in his left hand and a wicked smile adorned his face.
"Hello," he said. His smile hid his fangs.
"Hi. This is an audition room," said the woman.
Corey looked around the room. Realization struck him.
"Oh, you're right!"
Ortega was in complete and utter awe of Corey. He rose from his chair, his eyes wide and his jaw dropped.
"Corey Feldman?" said Ortega.
Corey looked around room. "Hey, who said that?"
Aaron pushed the door off him and stepped next to Corey. "He did."
"Oh," Corey replied, and then paused a bit. "Hey, you have some really long hair, man. Looks good on you too."
Ortega blushed and came round table. Yet, a stroke of brilliant realization hit him and he fell over. Random others rose from their seats and gasped as they gather around him.
A panicked woman asked,
"Kenny! Kenny! Are you all right?"
Ortega helped himself up as he replied, "How can you ask me if I'm all right? Of course I'm all right. Don't you see it? Can't you see it?"
The woman looked up and saw very confused Aaron and a cool, calm and collected Corey. "Erm, maybe."
Ortega shook all the random others off him as he slowly strode over to Corey with his arms in front of him.
"It's our Muse! Our Muse is standing before our silly mortal eyes. Don't you see? Mr. Feldman, you are an utter genius in my eyes. I mean, your performances – sheer, raw brilliance. I mean, License to Drive, Dream a Little Dream and The Lost Boys. You and Corey Haim were just so immortal and godlike in your exquisite performances…"
"Ah," said Corey in understanding, "you must've seen my movies. Thanks."
He took a bow, then walked over to the woman. He took her hand in his and kissed the ends of her fingers. She blushed. He smiled, showing his fangs. Then he turned to Ortega.
"So, I'm a Muse, huh? Cool."
Then music began playing – namely, "SexyBack" by Justin Timberlake. Corey smiled. The next night, he was in a dark alley next to a door leading to a nightclub, his back against the wall and one foot up against it like James Dean.
I'm bringing sexy back
Yeah
Them other boys dunno know how to act
Yeah
I think your special what's behind your back
Yeah
So turn around and I'll pick up the slack
Take em' to the bridge
(Bridge)
Dirty babe
You see these shackles
Baby I'm your slave
I'll let you whip me if I misbehave
It's just that no one makes me feel this way
Take em' to the chorus
(Chorus)
Come here girl
Go ahead, be gone with it
Come to the back
Go ahead, be gone with it
VIP
Go ahead, be gone with it
Drinks on me
Go ahead, be gone with it
Let me see what you're workin' with
Go ahead, be gone with it
Look at those hips
Go ahead, be gone with it
You make me smile
Go ahead, be gone with it
Go ahead child
Go ahead, be gone with it
And get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on
Get your sexy on
Get your sexy on
Get your sexy on
Get your sexy on
Get your sexy on
(Verse 2)
I'm bringing sexy back
Them mother fuckers don't know how to act
Come let me make up for the things you lack
‛Cause you're burning up I gotta get it fast
Take em' to the bridge
(Bridge)
Dirty babe
You see these shackles
Baby I'm your slave
I'll let you whip me if I misbehave
It's just that no one makes me feel this way
Take em' to the chorus
(Chorus)
Come here girl
Go ahead, be gone with it
Come to the back
Go ahead, be gone with it
VIP
Go ahead, be gone with it
Drinks on me
Go ahead, be gone with it
Let me see what you're workin' with
Go ahead, be gone with it
Look at those hips
Go ahead, be gone with it
You make me smile
Go ahead, be gone with it
Go ahead, child
Go ahead, be gone with it
And get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on…
I'm bringing sexy back
You mother fuckers watch how I attack
If that's your girl you better watch your back
‛Cause she'll burn it up for me and that's a fact
Take em' to the chorus
(Chorus) Come here girl
Go ahead, be gone with it
Come to the back
Go ahead, be gone with it
VIP
Go ahead, be gone with it
Drinks on me
Go ahead, be gone with it
Let me see what you're workin with
Go ahead, be gone with it
Look at those hips
Go ahead, be gone with it
You make me smile
Go ahead, be gone with it
Go ahead child
Go ahead, be gone with it
And get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
Get your sexy on…
Corey then walked over to a rapist. Quick as a flash, he was at the rapist's throat. Soon, the rapist was lying on the ground, dead. Corey cleaned his blood-stained fangs with his tongue, turned on his heel and stalked away.
"Now to tell Spike and Buffy."
Later on, Corey Haim joined him. Then they headed off to Spike's place. Buffy and Spike looked up as the Coreys landed in front of them.
"Coreys?" asked Spike. "What is it?"
Corey launched into his story. When he finished, Buffy looked intrigued, as did Spike.
"Wow," she remarked. "You killed a rapist just like that."
Corey nodded. "Yes. He deserved to die for all those crimes he committed against innocent women whose virginities he had stolen."
"I'm impressed," Spike remarked. "A vampire like you who does something like that is kind of like James Bond – only better, I'd say."
"Thanks," Corey replied. "And you're right – I am a James Bond, of course."
Buffy and Spike looked at each other. Buffy then explained that she was now the Slayer again.
"Apparently I didn't like being a vampire. So I did some thinking and I decided that being a Slayer was much more fun."
"Good for you, Buffy," said Corey. "A little mystery cure does help a Slayer-turned-vampire, you know."