My world chapter 1 : Change

BETA'D : eclipsed flower

Disclaimer : I do not own KHR.

Xxx

It was one of the days that Tsuna had went to school, and as usual, he had failed on all of his tests. To make it worse, he had faced bullies who were more than glad to inflict several new wounds on him. Tsuna had gotten home earlier than usual. He didn't want his Sensei or anyone elseto take their stress out on him and cause him more pain

.

He felt dejected, useless, and just simply tired at everything. No matter how much he tried, he failed again and again. Like on his tests. Even when he had studied, he had only gotten thirty out of hundred. No one wanted to help him so he couldn't ask anyone. His Sensei had given up, only seeing him as a loser and wouldn't help him anymore.

No one wanted to talk with him or be his friend. And his home tutor had simply come to his house with nothing to teach him.

Even though his mother, Nana, had loved him, she had also accepted the fact that her son was 'no good' and useless. He didn't like that. He had wanted Nana to be proud and praise him. He had wanted Nana to be happy and so that no one would dare to make fun of her. But she was gone. Dead. Murdered. He had lost his chance to prove his worth to her, and make her proud.

He was simply tired of everything. It was time he gave up and accepted that he was no good at living and useless at fighting back

.

It was meaningless to try to fight back. No matter how hard he tried, his mother would stay dead. His father didn't care about him and nobody expected anything from Dame-Tsuna.

"I'm home….." He muttered quietly. He was too embarrassed to face his mother because he had failed his test again and he didn't want to make her worry about his injuries.

But there was nothing to great had forgotten again. Nana was dead. A dull pain throbbed in his heart, but he pushed it away.

In the end, he was the same as that man. No good, always lying and making Nana wished he had the power to change that.

XXXX

Tsuna woke up crying, something he'd never done for a long time. After so many dreamless nights, why did he have to dream about that day again? The day that his world began to crumble and destroy itself.

He didn't want it to change.

"Time to wake up, Dame-Tsuna," a voice called out to the teenager who was barely aware of his surroundings.

A sharp kick to his stomach jolted him wide awake. Tsuna let out a cry and before he realized it, he was kicked again, this time from the other side and was pushed off his bed, flying through the air from the force. His tired body slammed into a wall mercilessly, like a rag doll.

Tsuna sent a hateful glare at the violentinfant.

"I'm hungry. Go make me some food," Reborn ordered.

Chocolate brown eyes blinked. When was the last time he ate? Last night? At lunch? He never ate properly anymore.

"There are some cup noodles. Just make them and go away," Tsuna said and buried himself back into the bed.

After he said that, Reborn landed another kick onto his face.

"What are you doing?!" Tsuna snapped.

"I mean cook me food properly, Dame Tsuna, and I can't make cup noodle anymore. I already burned them all because they're not good for your health."

Tsuna paled at the thought.

"What?!" He exclaimed.

Reborn smirked. "Don't worry about that. I will make you a leader in life. Now go cook me some edible food and go to school."

Xxx

'Are they finally gone?' Tsuna thought, panting and leaning against the alley walls behind a garbage can.

"He's got to be around here somewhere, go look for him!" a voice close by barked out, followed by the sound of footsteps coming closer.

Tsuna slowly sank to the ground, sighing in relief as the group of bullies ran past. He had been running from Mochida-senpai who held a long-lasting grudge against him. Just because he had lost a kendo match against him in middle school. It had been a fluke, anyway, but since then, Mochida hadn't stopped bullying him.

That was why he never liked going to school anymore. Just five minutes there, and he was already facing trouble. If only Reborn, the devil disguised in a baby's body hadn't forced him to go to school, he wouldn't have been in this mess.

Oh… how life hated him. For a second, a wry smile flashed across his face, a bitter one full of loathing and hatred of life. Because of his reputation, he had been made fun of by others since primary school

Tsuna closed his eyes and sighed. So many things had happened in the last 24 hours and it was getting on his nerves. He really wished everything would go back intoa normal, familiar pace. He didn't mind his life like that. At least he didn't get hurt by others too often. Only when he deigned to go to school.

"Running away? You really are Dame-Tsuna. Real men fight with their dying will," Reborn commented, suddenly appearing out of nowhere.

"I would lose anyway. There's no point in fighting. And what do you know about me?" Tsuna said wearily.

The infant looked up. Two, huge, pitch black, innocent eyes, baby eyes stared right into his. "I know, Dame-Tsuna, the pathetic loser who always runs away from everything. The no-good kid who can't be man enough to stand up for himself, but even so, I believe that you will be able to defeat Mochida with your dying will," the infant replied confidently.

Tsuna scoffed, "Last time was just luck. I never beat Mochida again –and even if I did, they wouldn't stop treating me like trash."

Reborn whacked Tsuna head with green hammer and left him alone amongst the trash, where he really belonged, Tsuna thought sardonically.

Xxx

Tsuna stepped through the sliding doors of his classroom, and went over to his desk at the back next to the window. He felt a little nostalgia. It had been a long time since he had gone to school.

"Hey Dame-Tsuna!" Yamamato called.

Yamamato was a star in the kendo club. He could become captain if he didn't slack off in practice and wasn't a first year like him. In middle school, he had jumped out off of the roof, and barely survived, because his arm had been broken. He had quit baseball after his recovery and became serious with the path of the sword instead.

Even after that, unlike him, Yamamoto Takeshi was athletic, though he hadn't exactly excelled in academics. He was the total opposite of Tsuna. He was popular, tall, out-going and friendly with people. And since he didn't focus on baseball anymore, his grades were good.

"Yes?" Tsuna asked, flustered. He was never good talking with people like Yamamoto.

"Mochida-senpai asked me to bring you to the gym after school. He wanted a match with you like in middle school. One on one."

Tsuna shivered at the thought. It had really been just pure luck. He had only beaten Mochida that time, once. It wouldn't happen second time. He would have to run away after school like always and lock himself in again.

"Well, good luck," Yamamoto told him cheerily with a smile on his face before leaving.

Xxx

After school

It was raining and the gym was filled with students. After all, it was history that the kendo club captain would go and challenge a useless weak guy, the famous Dame-Tsuna of the school. The fight itself promised so much to laugh at!

Who would pass the chance to watch Dame-Tsuna make a fool of himself like tripping in the middle of match?

But sadly, the brunet had chosen to be a coward and had run from the match. Yamamato had helped him run.

"Don't get me wrong, Tsuna. I'm helping you this time, but I won't ever forgive you," Yamamato said.

Tsuna went numb at his words. It was fine if Yamamato hated him. He deserved it. In middle school, Yamamato had sought his help, but he had given the wrong advice and had inadvertently caused Yamamato to break his arm.

He had been afraid to approach and console Yamamato after that. He was afraid that he had messed up and made Yamamato jump. He could be considered a killer. He didn't want that.

"At least it opened my eyes to people like you. You're just a loser who is selfish and will hurt other people for his own sake."

Tsuna just stayed quiet; he didn't dare utter a word in fear Yamamoto would be even madder at him than he already was. He was right. It was all his fault. If only he hadn't given his useless advice, maybe Yamamato would have continued to do what he enjoyed and played baseball and be a star of it in high school too.

He could see that Yamamato still longed for the sport he loved and was searching for friends."I'm sorry," his voice was hoarse, as he gave the useless apology. He held back his tears. He refused to cry in front of Yamamato.

Yamamato just sighed and walked back to school, ignoring Tsuna.

Suddenly, Reborn appeared at nowhere like always."Ciaossu! I see you're running away again. Are you happy to run away from every problem you face like this, Tsuna? Mochida won't stop pestering you and you will always be Dame-Tsuna."

"It's fine like this."

Xxx

Reborn left Tsuna alone so that Tsuna could cool off. He gritted his teeth. That child was a hopeless case. Well, he wouldn't be soft on him anymore. After watching and collecting data about Tsunayoshi, he was finally done with his investigation. Now it was time to teach Tsuna what his Spartan methods were like.

But, it was so strange.

Many things could be gained from killing Iemitsu Sawada's child. The man had many enemies amongst the mafia, enemies whom would pay a great deal for the corpse of the Young Lion of the Vongola's son, Sawada Tsunayoshi.

But the house looked so ordinary. No observers, and no protectors either. Nothing. Reborn scoffed. Iemitsu was so naive. Sometimes he wondered how Iemitsu could be the leader of the CEDEF. Maybe Iemitsu believed that Tsuna would be saved only if distanced himself or maybe he just didn't care about the child at all. Tsuna could be considered lucky to have lived so long.

The mafia world was unforgiving, cruel and dark. He had seen many good people die and only the heartless ones who backstabbed others survived. It was a den of monsters. Children died early in their lives because they were either killed or experimented on due to their connection with the mafia.

Tsuna wasn't an exception. He was being played with by the mafia cruelly even though he didn't know that. Nana was clearly murdered by a member of mafia who held a grudge against Iemitsu. And his father had a sick obsession with the mafia organization, Vongola.

That was why at least this child would have normal life. Away from mafia. That was the least he could do for him, and he would make sure of it.

Xxx

Tsuna finally arrived home. The house was filled with silence and darkness. He had gotten used to that. He searched for a light and tried to not trip in the dark room.

If only he didn't go out. He wouldn't be forced to face trouble. He hated how he was reminded by others how useless he was. He already knew that, and didn't need it to be rubbed in. He hated how he troubled others. No one would miss him if he was gone, anyway. He knew that. He had tried to take his life several times. But he was too much of a coward to go through with it.

Tsuna shook off the depressing thoughts as he headed to the bathroom. He passed the mirror, taking a look at his reflection. It showed a gloomy boy who had many bandages covering his face and his eyes were void of any emotions. His bangs covered his eyes and there were dark circles under them.

He tried to smile. Instead, it looked like a grimace. He had forgotten how to do that in a long time.

'Just smile and your pain will go away.' He always told himself to do that. To brush away every trouble and run away from them and forget about it. He didn't want to solve his trouble because he knew he would mess up in the end, like when he tried to be a friend to Yamamato and gave him the wrong piece of advice.

Seeing his reflection made him feel even worse – his futility showed on the outside, too.

There was a rising feeling in his chest telling him that he didn't want to run anymore, but he brushed it off like everything else and returned to his dark world.

Xxx