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The house already reeked of underage drinking and those that weren't hooking up were doing something pretty close to it in the middle of the dance floor.
My first high school party. And... This was it? Why did I even let the guys talk me into coming?
Come to think of it, they didn't really talk me into it. It was pretty much a "do or die" invitation.
"Rookie, you are going to this party. We're a team and we need to show unity. And if you don't come, I promise you'll make up for it at the next practice."
Trying to avoid a death sentence, I figured a half an hour wouldn't hurt and so I found myself lingering near the door, watching the after-dark versions of my classmates make decisions they'd surely regret in the morning, ready to make a fast get away when I could.
Someone shoved a red cup in my face and seeing as they were too wasted to understand my protests, I timidly reached out, taking the drink into my hand.
I sniffed and took a small sip, just for good measure. Hey, I might as well get the whole high experience while I'm here as I don't think I will ever be coming to another party.
Yuck! Alright, it was definitely time to go.
Just as I was heading out the door, Ice Hound jacket snuggled close around my body, eyes averted down, I saw her out of the corner of my eye.
Her blonde hair flashed by me in a blur and I swear I got a whiff of that vanilla lotion that regularly filled my nostrils in French.
Keep moving, Saunders. She's dating that dark haired niner, she's not into you. You aren't helping yourself by sticking around like some stalker.
My grip on the door handle loosened and I found myself leaning against a wall, my eyes never leaving her figure.
I watched her carefree movement on the dance floor, her laughter filling the air and bringing music to my ears every time her other niner friend did a ridiculous dance move.
She wasn't dancing with her boyfriend and I wondered where he was. I knew it was absurd, but something told me that he wasn't good enough for her, that they weren't meant to be.
Because she's meant to be with me.
I stood there watching her, and probably looking like a complete creep, for much longer than I anticipated. Her smile was so compelling and... beautiful. Every time she smiled, the room seemed to get a little lighter. No matter how hard I tried, and truthfully I wasn't trying very hard, I couldn't look away.
I just kept imagining myself out there dancing with her.
Snap out of it, Saunders. This is getting ridiculous. You've hardly ever talked to her!
My blonde soulmate pulled out her phone and then glanced around the room as if she was searching for someone, somewhat halfheartedly I noticed.
My eyes followed her running up the stairs until she was out of sight and I let out a sigh in frustration.
Maybe you could try talking to her. She has a boyfriend, but there's no rules against talking, right?
"Cammmmmm! You haven't danced like at all tonight! The star hockey player should definitely be on the dance floor. Dance with me!"
Before I could even will my feet to move, I was accosted by some half-drunk puckbunny, practically drooling over my future NHL title.
"Oh, I'm not much of a dancer, sorry. But Dallas, uh, he'd probably dance with you..."
"But I wanna dance with you, Campbell!"
The way she slurred over my full name brought about feelings of nausea and I wanted nothing more than for her to go away.
"No really, I just don't think-"
I was already running out of excuses when I saw that angelic blonde hair scurry down the stairs, tears staining her face, and run out the back door.
I left the puck bunny standing there and rushed out the same door.
For a girl I had never really talked to, my heart ached quite a bit for her pain.
Finding her sitting on the porch steps, head in hands, staring out at the lawn strewn with empty, crumpled cups, I cautiously made my way to her side.
She must have heard my footsteps as, without even turning around, she spoke out suddenly.
"I don't want to talk to you right now."
"Oh, I'm sorry... I didn't mean to interrupt you. I just wanted to see if you were alright. Uh, I'll go now..."
Nice going, Saunders.
Before I could even turn to leave, her head spun around and a look of pure mortification overtook her previous look of sorrow.
"Oh my gosh, uh, I-I'm sorry. I didn't know it was you, I thought it was someone else."
The way she stuttered and sucked in small, quick breaths between words tortured me to no end. There was a quirkiness in her demeanor that was so enticing.
With a sudden gust of confidence, I stepped forward and sat next to her on the steps, noticing the way she inched slightly to make room for me.
"So... Wanna talk about it?"
A giggle escaped her lips and I wanted nothing more than to capture that burst of laughter and forever play it over and over in my ears.
"It's... complicated."
"Well, the way I see it, there's a girl crying that most certainly doesn't deserve to be crying. What's wrong, Maya?"
Woah. Where is this coming from? Seriously, five minutes ago you couldn't wait to leave the party and now you're comforting the girl of your dreams like you do it for a living...
"You know my name?"
I wasn't expecting that as a response. Of course I knew her name.
"Of course. We have French together."
And I practically stare at you everyday...
"Oh right, duh. Sorry. I, uh, nevermind. Anyway, you don't want to hear about my life's drama I'm sure."
"Ah, but I do. See, if you don't tell me what's wrong, I'm going to spend the rest of my night wondering why such a pretty girl was crying so hard."
I realized immediately what I had said and saw her shift in her position while a rosy blush made its way to her cheeks.
You don't want her to think you're some sort of weirdo, Saunders. Say something else!
"But uh, you don't want that, do you? Come on, why are you crying, Maya?"
God, if this girl doesn't already think I'm a freak, she will be the end of this conversation.
"I saw Zig, my, um, boyfriend, kissing Tori, my best friend; she's in our French class, too. I'm sure you've noticed her if you've noticed me..."
"Oh God, Maya, I'm so sorry. I didn't-I didn't know. Are you okay?"
Wow, Saunders. This is just going fantastic for you, isn't it?
Her faced contorted into that of a smile, almost portraying relief. Obviously, my confusion was pretty evident because Maya spoke up.
"Would it be horrible if I said I was happy?"
I could hardly mask my excitement. I knew they weren't right for each other.
"No, I don't think so. But if you're happy about it, why were you crying?"
More giggles, then more tears.
Laughter and crying mixing together, pulling my heart apart at the seams.
"I haven't wanted to be with Zig for a long time. Actually, I never wanted to be with Zig. We just aren't right for each other. But he's Tori's ex and I couldn't just break up with him. She would've hated me. So, I just dated him and dated him and dated him... God, it feels like I've been dating him forever. It's only been like a month! Oh, and then-" Her voice cracked and I swear my heart was breaking within my chest. Hearing such happiness mixed with such regret killed me.
"Then tonight I was finally free. I finally got an out, I was done with Zigmund Novak. But how horrible does that make me sound? I'm such a bad person for stringing him along. But then Tori, my best friend in the entire world, kissing him behind my back? I should be mad, right? And I am! But then part of me doesn't even care because I didn't want him in the first place. It's not like I'm angry that they're hooking up. I think I'm happy. I'm definitely happy."
My face must have flatlined because Maya's tear-stained face broke out into a fit of laughter and then morphed into a look of sympathy.
"I'm sorry! I must sound psychotic... But it felt really good to finally say all of that. Uh, I guess I should be going. There's no reason for me to stay here and since I'd rather not get a ride with either of them, I had better start walking. Th-thanks for listening... I'm sorry again."
I noticed the nervousness that invaded her voice and the cute inflection of insecurity.
Now's your chance, Saunders.
She started to walk away, turning on her heels, but I spoke up begging her to wait.
"It's no problem, really. I enjoyed talking to you. And I'm gonna walk you home, okay?"
Clearly caught off guard by my bold statement, hell, I was caught off guard by my bold statement, Maya began stuttering with her answer.
"Y-you don't have to do that, I'll be fine, r-really. Plus, you should stay... I don't want to make you leave the party..."
"Maya, I'm having about as much fun at this party as you are." I saw her crack a smile and continued on. "I only came cause the guys forced me. Besides, I'm not going to let a crying girl walk home alone, at night, when there's weird drunk people roaming the streets. What kind of guy do you think I am?"
The smile that graced her perfect face was too much and I thanked the universe for finally letting something go my way.
Twenty minutes later, we were rounding the corner to Maya's house and I could feel my heart dropping into my stomach, unwilling to let her go.
"Thanks for walking me home, I had fun talking to you." The shyness I so adored enveloped Maya once again and she spoke her gratitude staring at the sidewalk, the meekest of smiles plastered on her face.
"No problem. I had fun, too. You're different, Maya." Her eyes found mine and I wondered what in the world possessed me to say what I had. Yet I knew what I said was the most truth I had spoken all night. "You're not like the other girls. You're different."
Her eyes flashed with embarrassment and hesitation.
"In a good way. In a really good way."
And with that I turned around, walking swiftly in case my newfound confidence decided to desert me and there was still time for me to screw something up.