Disclaimer: I don't feel like writing this and I don't think that I should have to. I don't own HP and I never will. Blah.

I do not own the song I used in there, and to the people who don't listen to the Beatles, it's a song called Sexy Sadie by the Beatles.

I Live For My Man Diary

"Sirius, what are you doing?" Lily asked as she peered over his hunched-over shoulders in Transfiguration class. She was behind him and he hadn't been paying attention all class, he had been writing.

" . . . Now Lily starts to read your entry . . . how evil of her," Sirius was muttering under his breath. "She won't go out with James, and at the time, you don't think she ever will . . . ."

"Black, what the hell are you doing? McGonagall wants us to Transfigure our rats!" Lily said harshly.

"She won't leave you alone and she is getting on your nerves . . . ."

"Black!"

"Now she repeats your name . . . like she thinks you forget it . . ." Sirius continues to write.

"Urg! Whatever!" Lily said.

" . . . Psycho."

"Pads, why are you calling Evans psycho?" James asked, walking over to him. He had already transfigured his rat, being the best at transfiguration in the year. "Only I can."

"You so called friend starts talking to you. You remember him, don't you? His name is James Harold Potter . . . you met him when you were eleven years old . . ." Sirius muttered.

"What are you doing?" James asked, giving him a weird expression. "Oh! Writing in that retarded diary of yours . . . ."

"He hurts your feelings by calling your diary 'retarded'. . . ."

"Sirius Orion Black! You need to stop!"

"Remus being to yell at you. You don't understand why, though."

"Mr. Black, where is your rat?" McGonagall asked sharply.

"Your teacher begins to get agitated. . . ."

"Mr. Black, detention, tonight at 10 o'clock, sharp!"

"She gives you a detention. . . ."

James grabs the diary from Sirius hands.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Sirius says, then takes a breath. "NOOOOOOOOO!"

"That is enough, Mr. Black! Go in the time-out corner!" McGonagall yells.

Sirius shuffles unhappily over to the corner labeled 'Sirius Black's Quiet Seat'. He sat down and began singing to himself.

"Sexy Sadie . . . what have you done! You made a fool of everyone! You made a fool of everyone! You . . . Sexy Sadie! You get yours yet!" Sirius sang, forgetting words.

"Mr. Black, would you please stop singing?" McGonagall asked. "Hence the name Sirius's Quiet Chair."

"Right, Professor," Sirius nodded.

Sadie Harrison, who was sitting next to Lily, was blushing profusely.

"However big you think you arrrrre! SEXY SADIE! YOU GET YOURS YET!" Sirius screamed.

"MR. BLACK!"

"Sorry, Minerva."

"Go see your Head of House!"

Sirius hung his head but grinned. "Okay," he grumbled and stood up and trudged over to McGonagall. "Professor McGonagall, Professor McGonagall sent me."

McGonagall was fuming, but trying not to laugh. "Urg! Go see Dumbledore!"

"Can I have my Man Diary back?" Sirius asked.

"Your what?" she asked.

"No! Don't give it back!" James, Lily, and Remus said in unison.

"Shut up!" Sirius said to them. "I live for my Man Diary!"

"No! You can't have it back! Now, go see Dumbledore!"

"Yes, Sir," Sirius said. "I mean Miss! I mean Mrs.! I mean . . . shit! I mean . . . damn! I mean CRAP!"

"Mr. Black!"

"What?" Sirius asked as if nothing had happened.

"Leave!"

"Coolness."

"He's completely lost it," James said to Lily and Remus.

"He's going to get himself killed," Remus sighed.

"I think you all are going to get yourselves killed," Lily said.

A/N: There you go! Review, be cool, and tell me what you thought!

Love,

--Eternal Love LJ

I do not own the song I used in there, and to the people who don't listen to the Beatles, it's a song called Sexy Sadie by the Beatles.