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Chapter One:

Restless

Padme's mind reeled over many thoughts, too many to count. It would be impossible for her to sleep tonight.

Why me and Obi-Wan? What kind of a wife does Anakin think that I am? Why is he mad at me for this? It isn't my fault! Does Anakin actually believe I'm unfaithful to him, that I'm having an affair with his master? What have I done wrong?? What if he takes it out on Obi-Wan!! I hope he doesn't! What will Obi-Wan think of such an accusation? Will Anakin tell him? Has Obi-Wan said something to make him believe his nightmare is a possibility?

These thoughts were making her stomach sick and uneasy. She wanted to get up and take a walk outside. To feel the cool night air and see the city's lights would calm her down. She wished it so much that her mind and body ached to move, not to lay with her thoughts. Much as she yearned for it, this idea was impossible because her husband, who to her relief was now deeply asleep, had locked his arms around her as if to prevent her from leaving him. Now she would be forced to lie awake and think about all of the problems this unsettling nightmare had caused her. Oh how she wished she could talk to someone about this! She had no idea how to handle this situation and desperately wanted to confide in someone, anyone, who could help her. But deep down, she knew that no matter how much she wished that to be an option, she could not. In doing so, she would have to reveal her secret marriage to Anakin for anyone to fully understand her problem. No matter what he thought she was doing, no matter what kind of treachery he accused her of, every fiber of her being screamed against causing him the pain of that betrayal. No, these problems would have to be dealt with alone. This was the safest way, the only way. Now to think of a solution… Try as she might, her mind was exhausted and she couldn't concentrate. Before she realized it, she soon sank into a blissfully peaceful sleep, laced with pleasant dreams. Ironically, her dreams were also about Obi-Wan, but this was no nightmare...

Padme smiled at the young man standing before her. Oh, how her handmaidens had talked of this young, handsome Jedi! He had all of the charms they had gushed about, and so much more.

"Do you need some help with that?" the Jedi offered.

"Oh, this?" Padme asked looking down at the R2 droid she was cleaning off, "No! I'm fine, thanks."

"Okay" the Jedi said, flashing her a beautiful smile. If only he realized the power in such a grin! "I have some time before my master needs me. It just looked like you might want some assistance."

"Well thank you! That is very kind." Padme smiled back as she tried to keep her cheeks from turning red.

"What is your name?" the Jedi asked.

"Padme" she said, now turning her attention back on the droid to keep herself from betraying more than she already had. She had heard somewhere that Jedi could read minds and emotions.

"Padme… That's a nice name" the Jedi nodded as if he had guessed her name silently, and been right. "You have a great smile."

"You are just full of compliments aren't you, Master Jedi?" Padme teased as she looked back at him. The R2 united beeped complaints. She wasn't sure, but it sounded as if he was asking why he was not clean already.

"Master Jedi?" the Jedi asked, amused "Hardly. I'm not even a Jedi Knight yet! As to being full of compliments, I'm just trying to be honest. You are the one that is full of compliments, flattering me by calling me a Jedi Master!"

"I'm sorry. It might help if you told me your name, though." Padme laughed.

"Obi-Wan Kenobi." he said, just as a voice called to him from afar. "That's my master. I have to go now. It was nice to meet you, Padme."

"Same to you, Obi-Wan," Padme said, wishing that he didn't have to leave.

Padme wished a lot of things, many of which were far from possible. She wished her planet hadn't been danger, wished that she had less to worry about, wished she had more time to get to know her new friend, and hoped that she would never forget that feeling that she had at their chance meeting. Those feelings were quickly substituted with a new kind of affection for young Anakin, which was a completely different from what she had for Obi-Wan. However, they were both to be her good friends; at least they were until... Qui-gon's death had changed everything. Strife within the galaxy had called them all in different directions. They had no choice but to part ways. After all those years, who would have guessed she would have met them again and that she would find such a bond with Anakin? If her younger self had known this, she probably wouldn't have believed it. Would her younger self have been disappointed in her choice? Once, after Qui-gon's funeral, she wanted to tell Obi-Wan that he had been in her thoughts, almost like a childhood crush. When she found him, however, he was not the same lighthearted padawan from before. He was heartbroken and distraught, forced into responsibility far too suddenly. The light in his eyes had gone, shadowed by the heavy burden of guilt. It wasn't the time to tell him, so she never did. So when she met them again and Anakin came along with his obvious feelings for her she forgot those feelings that she had for Obi-Wan when they met secretly years ago. His feelings she guessed had pushed away or traded in for the responsibilities of having a new padawan to train alone. He was still a good friend to her however, the possibility of being anything more than that had seemed to be mutually abandoned. Had she made the right choice?

Padme looked carefully at the two plates on the kitchen counter, mentally checking off that every item she prepared this morning had made its way on to them. Normally she wouldn't feel so pressured to not forget something, to make breakfast so perfect, but she was nervous. Anakin was leaning against opposite wall, staring at her, as if to he was waiting for her to do something out of character, or make some kind of false move. She had been under his gaze all morning. She couldn't shake the feeling that he was carefully studying her thoughts and emotions. What could he be searching for? Surely he didn't doubt her still! Padme remained confident under her husband's meticulous gaze, acting as if she didn't even notice that he was watching her. Why should she act hurt or upset that he was doing this? She had nothing to hide and she wanted to prove that to him. She calmly walked into the dining room and over to the table and set the plates down in front of their seats. Cheerfully, Padme asked,

"Are you eating breakfast this morning?"

"Of course I am! It looks delicious Padme!"

Padme relaxed in her chair. She had done a good job and Anakin was happy. This is the way things are supposed to be.

Casually, Padme asked her husband,

"What are your plans for today, Ani?"

"Well... that depends. What are your plans?" Anakin said after swallowing a mouthful of food. The statement seemed innocent enough, as did the tone of his voice, but Padme knew him better. There was something behind those words that hinted that he still felt suspicious of her actions.

"I was planning to go out with some of the senators from Naboo that are in town today. It appears that the Chancellor wishes to speak with them later in the day." Padme stated, although she was pretty sure that she had already informed Anakin about this weeks ago.

"Are you included in this required meeting?" Anakin questioned.

"Yes I am, Ani." Why was he asking her these questions? He knew this! Had he forgotten?

"And what is this meeting about?" Anakin said continuing this unnecessary interrogation.

"How should I know? The Chancellor didn't say. I assume you know, since you spend more time with him than I do." Padme said as calmly as she could. She tried not to finish her sentence by adding, you spend more time with him than you do with me. Instead she kept it to herself. What she had said out loud had turned out to be enough.

"What are you implying? Is it wrong of me to spend time with him? Are you forgetting that I am his friend and I will soon represent him on the Jedi Council? Why do you assume I see him and that I'm not training with Obi-Wan? My master has been over here recently hasn't he?!? When?!?" Anakin demanded as he shouted those last words and shoved away his plate that went flying off the table as he stood up.

"No!" Padme exclaimed "I never accused you of anything! I merely stated that you see him more than I do because you are his friend and representative!! I have no idea how Obi-Wan was dragged into this!! I never assumed that you weren't training with him while you aren't at home!"

"Why did you bring Obi-Wan into this?" Anakin accused.

"Ani I didn't!! You did that!!" Padme responded desperately.

Anakin paused a few moments as he reached into Padme's thoughts and realized that she had been right and that there was nothing there that held any special feelings for his master.

"Your right Padme… I'm sorry" Anakin said as he used the Force to pick up the pieces of breakfast he had spilt on the floor. "Please forgive me. These dreams are just so hard to get rid of. They seem so real. I didn't mean to yell at you. You must forgive me."

"I do, Anakin" Padme answered solemnly then sat there thinking about what had just been said. I must forgive him? Was this really her will? The words "I do" slipped out of her mouth before she could even debate them.

Anakin smiled as if all was better again and kissed her goodbye.

"Have a nice day Padme. I will see you this evening."

He left her alone like he had so many times before. He had to live his own life and not hint at the secret marriage between the two. He went off to be the Jedi, and her to be the Senator, and no one would ever see them as husband and wife. One thing he didn't know and never would was what happened next. Padme looked around the empty room with tears welling in her eyes, and cried until her heart stopped hurting. When her friends saw her an hour later than expected, she conjured up a brilliant lie and smiled like she hadn't ever been hurt. No one would ever know what she had gone through and that was just the way she wanted it.