Pre-season: Tony's 2nd Year
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Christmas Day 2002…
Tony's slow return to wakefulness occurred late in the afternoon, with the sun shining low and bright through the large window creating a soft golden glow around the contemporarily sparse, yet homely living room. Taking note of every twinge in his aching back, no doubt a result of sleeping on the worn sofa, he blinked a few times to clear his vision and assimilate his new surroundings. He was halfway through a stretch when his shuffling feet connected with something warm and solid that definitely wasn't the sofa.
Tony gently kicked it experimentally, but froze upon hearing the not-sofa's soft groan of protest, "Boss?"
"Who were you expecting DiNozzo?" Gibbs frowned at him over the top of an open book which he rested on Tony's feet, which were resting - of all places – on Gibbs' lap.
"I'm not sure I was expecting to wake up with anyone." Tony answered nervously, head cocked to the side focusing on the book cover, trying to ignore their close proximity.
"Yeah?" Gibbs dropped the book to the coffee table before Tony could read the title, "Well you got me."
He shrugged with a teasing smile that only set Tony's nerves even further on edge.
"No offence Gibbs," Tony paused, swallowed and regrouped, even he could hear he fear in his voice, "but what's going on?"
"You don't remember?"
Tony shook his head, decidedly nervous, wondering where his double b for bastard boss, as he remembers calling him recently, had gone. Gibbs appeared to be giving his none answer some serious thought though.
He grunted, gaze appraising him, then after a short pause spoke, "it's Christmas DiNozzo."
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Two days earlier…
"Vivian around?" Ducky asked immediately upon entering the dimly lit bullpen.
He was flustered to say the least, the case they were wrapping up was taking a little longer than anticipated to dot the i's and cross the t's. Staffing was the main cause for his slow progress, they'd started the week on a skeleton crew due to the holidays, so despite it being a Monday the whole office was almost assuredly to be deserted by 5pm, which meant instead of making the usual phone calls to get things squared away he was having to do a lot of the running around himself and for a man of his advanced years that wasn't an easy task.
"No Ducky," Tony answered flatly without looking away from his computer screen.
Ducky paused in front of his desk, watching the boy type using just his index finger, jabbing the keys awkwardly like a toddler with a new toy he didn't fully understand. It was fascinating really, out of all the people Gibbs could have recommended for hire and requested to build a team with, he chose likely the only other person on the planet who possessed worse computer skills than he did.
"When are you going to take Abby up on those typing lesson Anthony, really it would make your life so much easier." He smiled kindly, settling himself comfortably at the adjacent empty desk, the reason for his visit temporarily forgotten.
"I do okay." Tony responded quietly, gaze still fixed to his screen.
Ducky could sense not only the high level of concentration going on, but also the dejected disappointment in his voice and believed he knew why Tony was showing even less prowess than usual with the poor abused keyboard he was systematically tapping the life out of.
"So you think you can manage to type this one only twice instead of the customary four?" He chuckled, knowing that even a year down the line and Gibbs was still sending his reports back to be redone.
"His record is five," Gibb strolled into the bullpen at that exact moment, coffee in hand.
"Preparing for a long wait Jethro?" Ducky hinted at the large still steaming coffee cup.
That comment did provoke a reaction in the focused young man, and Ducky laughed heartily when Tony shot daggers at the pair of them while they shared a rare smile.
"What you doing here Duck?" Gibbs settled himself down at his own desk.
"Ah, well," Ducky had to think for a second before it came back to him, "I needed Agent Blackadder's signature…"
He cut himself short because though he hadn't warmed to the new young lady just yet he had no desire to get her in trouble.
"What she forget Duck?" Gibbs said evenly, though no one could miss the icy undertone.
"Chain of evidence," he said bluntly wishing he'd caught the mistake sooner and saved her what was sure to be a severe punishment.
Gibbs threw down the pen he'd been using to sign off on his own paperwork and swore under his breath. Ducky heard the sudden silence over at DiNozzo's desk and like Tony waited patiently for the volcano to explode, but it never did.
"I'll deal with it, go home Duck." He said tightly.
The keyboard abuse resumed and Gibbs collected up his pen.
"Well mother is spending the holidays with an old family friend in aspen." Ducky relaxed, happy the moment had passed without incident, though he did feel for Vivian coming into the office in the morning, "I was invited too of course but our most recent case made my going somewhat impossible. I thought I'd see what you were doing?"
Gibbs shrugged, "same as always."
"Unless we get another case," Tony muttered dejectedly, "since we're on call all week."
The comment was followed by several hard whacks to his computer screen and a tormented shout of 'oh come on!'
"DiNozzo," Jethro made the name sound like a warning, "You break that thing and I'll be deducting the replacement costs from your paycheque."
"Sorry boss." The no-longer-a Probie ground out like it pained him.
Ducky raised an eyebrow and standing from the desk walked over to Gibbs to speak privately.
"Is Anthony alright Jethro? Seems a little down, normally he's as bouncy as Abby around the holidays…"
Gibbs looked up and over at DiNozzo.
"His girlfriend broke up with him." He sounded annoyed, and to anyone who knew him well, there was a hint of barely detectable concern in there too.
"I broke up with her actually." Tony interjected, mainly to point out he could hear them, but unfortunately whatever had been building up inside the poor lad, taking it out on the computer keyboard was no longer enough and that one comment broke the dam that had clearly been holding it all in, "And what sane person wants their boyfriend to meet the parents after only four months of dating anyway? There are rules to these things you can't just-"
Listening to him air his woes Ducky felt the brief concern he'd felt leave him since it turned out to be nothing more than a spot of woman trouble affecting his favourite boy. This sort of thing wasn't uncommon and he'd soon learned not to worry too much when it came to Tony and his girlfriends. He wasn't the committing type, or so he rambunctiously claimed.
"Got your hands full I see." Ducky turned back to Gibbs, eyebrows raised as Tony continued his rant, completely unaware of the amusement they were gaining from his youthful outrage.
Or rather he was gaining. Jethro simply nodded with a look of paternal concern on his face. It was a look Ducky had become accustomed to seeing more and more often in recent months. And the fact Tony had been having a hard time of it recently a coincidence? As Gibbs would say, there's no such thing. Vivian's recruitment to the team in September was only one of many things not going smoothly for them. For starters Jethro liked to pick his team members, so when Director Morrow assigned the young woman Ducky knew he'd be getting several unscheduled visits where ranting was the order of the day. Of course this spelled trouble for young Anthony too, since he so often took the brunt of his dear friend's bad moods, more so now that he was a full Agent and deemed capable to handle anything Jethro threw at him, sometimes literally. However it was the incident back in October, which landed poor Anthony in the hospital and upset Gibbs so much that he ended up sharing some rather personal details about his protégé over the young man's ICU bed. That alone had led to an increase of paternal stares aimed at the clueless young man still bashing the life out of one undeserving keyboard.
Ducky's gaze unintentionally lingered on the object of his thoughts and Tony must have sensed him looking because he stopped typing and eyed them speculatively.
"You got that report for me yet DiNozzo?" Gibbs barked putting his pissed off face back on and making Ducky jump with the ferocity.
Tapping the desk to gain Jethro's attention Ducky gave him an reproving look, communicating without words a reminder of the numerous times he'd warned him to go easy on the boy. He was rewarded with a modicum of success when, sighing deeply, Gibbs gave in.
"Ok, clocking off time DiNozzo, you can finish that report tomorrow." The look he immediately shot Ducky asked, satisfied? And the smile Ducky sent back return answered, quite.
Tony however had lifted from his dejected slump with a frozen look of surprise on his face. When Jethro nodded at him adding a small lip curl to assure him he meant it, Tony wasted no time in grabbing his things and shouting a hesitant 'thank-you boss' before running out.
Gibbs waited until Tony was safely in the elevator before dropping his head to hide the wide smile he let loose at his antics.
"Night cap then Jethro? My treat" Ducky added, as a form of persuasion, "tomorrow is Christmas eve after all."
"Why not," Gibbs shrugged in the affirmative getting up and walking over to Tony's desk to switch off the lamp he'd left on.
Cheered at the thought of actually getting Jethro out of his basement for the second Christmas in a row Ducky reached behind the spare desk to pick up his coat which he'd left there when out the corner of his eye he saw Gibbs hovering over Anthony's computer looking perturbed.
"Something wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost."
"Maybe I have," Gibbs muttered and then called him over, pointing at the still switched on computer screen.
The look of unease on his friend's face was enough to make Ducky dread whatever it was he'd found and without thought of whether this was considered snooping or not he quickly stepped behind the incredibly messy desk to take a look himself.
"Oh Jethro," he breathed upon reading what Jethro had found, "the poor boy…"
Gibbs growled under his breath, looking at the screen like he could interrogate it into giving him all the answers he needed to make sense of what it displayed. Ducky saw his jaw clench and eyes narrow, a sure sign he was experiencing feelings way out of his comfort zone and had no idea how to either express or deal with them. Gibbs had never been one for hand holding and he'd been harder on DiNozzo than any other Probie before him, but, despite the bastard persona he put out there, it was clear to those that knew him best, namely Ducky and Abby, that Tony meant more to him than just another Agent on his team.
"What are you going to do?" Ducky asked cautiously when Gibbs unfroze and clicked off the monitor without shutting the system down.
"I'm not going to do anything. Tony wants my help he'll ask for it." Gibbs snapped and shrugged defensively at him, which was code for he had no idea what to do because it didn't involve arresting or killing someone. "I'm not going to baby him."
Ducky shook his head at his pig-headed stubbornness. Gibbs was denying his feelings, ones that had started off fairly innocent, but over the last year had grown from seeing something in a young detective worth investing his time in to discovering he cared for the boy's wellbeing far beyond his safety on the job.
"Jethro talking to the lad about his problems is not babying him," Ducky chastised quite fed up with his continual denial of what they all knew to be the truth. "Wait, you're not not going to help him just because he hasn't come to you yet are you?"
Gibbs completely ignored him of course, but he was undeterred as they walked out together heading for the bar. He'd always loved a challenge, and working out what Gibbs was thinking and feeling would be just that. Something was going to break soon he could feel it. Ducky just hoped that something wasn't going to be young Anthony.
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"Morning boss!" Tony shouted running in with a bright smile, no doubt trying to pretend like he wasn't over 30 minutes late.
Vivian and Gibbs were both already at their desks looking as equally stony as each other. He'd had it out with her about the chain of evidence mistake Ducky alerted him to yesterday and unfortunately for her Ducky had been right about him being rather angry that Tony hadn't told him about the email he'd accidently seen on his computer last night. Something had been bugging Gibbs all day about DiNozzo and it had driven him to distraction. The change in him from just the previous week had been so pronounced he'd wanted to call him out on it, but couldn't think of a way to address his sombre attitude without making it obvious he had no idea what was wrong. So Tony wasn't excited about Christmas? So what? Why should he care right? The problem was he did care. Cared enough that while he should have been conference calling with Bahrain from MTAC yesterday he had actually been going over in his head all the possible reasons Tony would have to be upset. And to be honest his father didn't figure into any of the explanations Gibbs had come up with.
Now it was Tuesday, Christmas Eve, and Tony seemed to have gotten his game together, or more likely he'd found a way to hide his hurt so it wasn't obvious anything was wrong. Well he could maybe fool the others, but he couldn't fool him and now he knew what was wrong he was in a stronger position to push Tony into doing something about it.
"You're late," Gibbs barked as Tony tiptoed over to his desk, looking chastised before he'd even had the chance to ball him out.
He really was starting to hate that look.
"I know," he admits without preamble, and then Gibbs knows it's bad because he doesn't even try to explain or make a joke, "but I got the report finished."
Tony quickly picked up a file from his desk that hadn't been there when he'd left last night and handed it to him. He took it and gave it a cursory once over for obvious mistakes. Tony was still smiling at him Gibbs realised, obviously waiting to be either punished or forgiven for his tardiness. He settled a heated glare on him and kept it up as Tony gingerly walked back over to his desk and took his seat. To anyone watching he appeared to be angry, but he knew Tony knew that the glare expressed a lot more than his displeasure.
"I thought I ordered you home." Gibbs said moving on and making it clear he wasn't happy about him coming back into the office in the middle of the night either.
"I do some of my best work at night boss," Tony winked, brushing off the icy tone with ease.
Too much ease as far as he was concerned. At first Gibbs had put it down to cheek, but after a few close calls where he'd gotten to see the real Anthony DiNozzo Jr, who it turned out was a kid far less cock sure of himself than he liked to portray, Gibbs noticed that Tony was never more at ease than when he was being yelled at. After leaving last night he'd had a drink with Ducky, who had tried to get him talking, but his mind had been elsewhere and remained elsewhere all evening. It may have helped him by preventing him from getting into anything too deep with Ducky, but it also prevented him from getting anything resembling sleep, even with a boat full of bourbon in his gut. It had gotten so bad that he'd decided there was nothing for it - he'd started drawing up plans to build another boat in his basement. If he wasn't going to sleep he may as well do something productive. Talking of sleep, one look at DiNozzo as he slunk behind his desk looking like death warmed over told him he wasn't the only one not getting at least his manageable four hours.
Vivian was staring at them from the adjacent desk, but when she noticed he'd noticed quickly put her head down. Gibbs still didn't like her, wasn't sure why but there was something, he sensed she was going to get them in trouble – more than she'd already caused by continually forgetting basic crime scene rules and landing Tony in ICU a couple of months ago. Though not directly her fault, she didn't physically hurt him, it was her mistake that left Tony unprotected aboard a ship with a group of marines who had nothing to lose. He also hated her hair. It reminded him of his ex-wife.
With his thoughts temporarily side-tracked on hospitals, hair and wives he missed the rare moment of vulnerability that crossed Tony's face when he turned on his computer monitor and realised he hadn't shut it down properly from the night before.
A phone rang before anymore could be said on the matter.
Gibbs spoke a few choice words to the caller then addressed the room. "Gear up! We got a missing Petty Officer..."
"Only missing?" Vivian asked.
"Did I forget to mention the fifty thousand that went missing with him?" Gibbs glared at her, still sat dumbly at her desk while he and Tony where halfway to the elevator.
"Great," Tony muttered completely enthused. "A missing person's case on Christmas Eve, at least 48 hours of non-stop working fun. This week just keeps getting better."
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"Mrs Barnes?" Gibbs asked when the much older looking than her birth date suggested, woman open the door.
"Yes?"
"Agents Gibbs, DiNozzo and Blackadder NCIS," Gibbs said stoically, showing his badge and pointing to his junior agents in turn.
"Stu's commander said you'd be round." Jenifer Barnes left the agents standing at the door to follow her in and without resting her empty glass stumbled into the living room.
The distinctive smell of stale alcohol and cigarettes permeated the room, making the atmosphere stuffy and uncomfortable. There was no tree or decorations of any kind despite the information they had indicating Barnes and her son where Catholic, but then he didn't have decorations up either. First time he'd had a tree in over a decade was last year when Abby and DiNozzo had dragged one home with them last Christmas Eve. He wasn't against them, just didn't see the point. He guessed Mrs Barnes felt the same way.
"I've no idea why mind you," she poured herself another scotch and took a long drink, waving the bottle at them before falling into the sofa pressed against the wall of one of the most cluttered apartments Gibbs had ever seen – and he'd been to DiNozzo's place. "Not seen Stu in nearly three years."
"Since he joined the Navy," Blackadder interrupted, still standing stiffly in the doorway not doing a good job of hiding her disgust at the state of the apartment and getting a look from Mrs Barnes.
"You're sharp," Barnes replied, not even remotely meaning it as a compliment. "So what's he done? Why you after him?"
"What makes you think he's done something?" Gibbs queried taking an unoffered seat.
"I've Navy cops in my living room," she drawled, rolling a cigarette with her right hand while she nursed her scotch in her left.
Gibbs chuckled politely, hiding his pity for this woman that had lost a son, not through death perhaps, but lost all the same.
"Stuart went AWOL from his ship yesterday," Tony finally joined them.
He'd been pacing the length of the room, looking around, scouting out any places a 6ft 4 petty officer might hide in a one bed apartment. Everything Gibbs expected him to do, only on this occasion Gibbs wasn't convinced Tony's head was fully on the case and he'd bet his father's email had something to do with that.
"So?" Mrs Barnes lit her cigarette and relaxed back into the sofa even more.
"Soooo, he took fifty grand, the entire crew's wages for Christmas leave with him," Tony turned on her.
"Stu wouldn't do that," she snapped defensively. "What the hell are you suggesting?"
"We're not suggesting anything mam," Blackadder put in politely, thinking she was helping. "We just thought your son might have contacted you, I'm sorry if we upset you."
Gibbs cursed under his breath at her stupidity, but had to roll with it
"Well you did," Mrs Barnes started to yell, "Now get out I've got stuff to do,"
Gibbs stood and eyeing Tony indicated they were to leave, he left Blackadder to follow.
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Out in the hall Tony walked a little way down the dark damp corridor so Vivian didn't have an audience to her second raking over the coals of the day. As soon as she'd opened her mouth Tony had seen what was coming, had he been paying more attention he could have forestalled her, interrupted her, something that didn't end with her blowing the unofficial interrogation he and Gibbs were working up to. He knew she'd been yelled at this morning too, that was the real reason he'd been late. The email from his dad had knocked him for six Monday morning and though he was sure he'd get over it Tony didn't think he could handle listening to Gibbs chewing out Viviane without being reminded of him and he never wanted to associate Gibbs with his father. For his own sanity he couldn't.
Tony had reached the stairwell and did a quick 180 on his heel to turn back when out of nowhere a very large man barrelled out of an apartment door to his left, right in his blind spot. Tony wasn't even aware of him until he pushed into him, knocking him down the flight of stairs. He felt the first hit keenly, but the following bumps as he toppled down the steps just added bruises upon bruises until his head impacted the wall at the back of the sub-landing. Feet ran past him and without thinking Tony pulled himself up to run after them.
His head is fuzzy, vision blurry when he exits the building onto the street. He thinks he shouts at the man to stop, thinks he calls him by his name 'oh Stuart!' He thinks he identifies himself as a federal agent. But all Tony knows for sure is that his feet have left the ground and that searing pain in his side isn't an injury he sustained in the fall, but from the impact of the Chevy impala that ran smack into him when he chased the suspect across the road.
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"What the hell DiNozzo!"
Gibbs slapped Tony round the face to gain his attention before he yelled at him again and then peeled him off the street, bodily carrying him, feet dragging uselessly against the concrete, over to the sidewalk where he dropped him and proceeded to shake the living hell out of him.
"Boss," Tony pleaded nasally around the blood running out of his swollen nose.
"What the HELL did you think you were doing?"
"Boss,"
"You're lucky they managed to stop in time, you could have gotten yourself killed!"
"Boss,"
"You weren't thinking!" Gibbs shook him again, harder.
"Boss I'm going throw up," Tony said quickly, just before bending over and empting his stomach to the left of Gibbs' shoes.
That should have touched a nerve within him, but Gibbs had started the day off in an extra grumpy mood and Tony's lateness combined with his own lack of sleep and Blackadder's incompetence had pushed him beyond all that was considered reasonable behaviour for him today.
"You good?" He asked in a more controlled tone, rubbing a palm over the strained shoulder muscles when he stopped gaging.
He was holding Tony up at the waist, arms encircling him so he didn't fall flat into the vomit puddle he'd just created and decided to give him a minute to gather himself. He'd heard more so than saw Tony take the header down the stairs, but no one was more surprised than him when he reached the sub-landing just in time to see Tony running out the building. With his heart in his throat Gibbs was just in time to witness the Chevy slam its breaks on, knock their suspect down and then serve into Tony, clipping him enough to send him sprawling to the floor, but not so bad that Tony was already sitting up by the time Gibbs reached his side.
Tony made a grunt of protest and tugged Gibbs' sleeve, indicating he wanted up. He helped him stand upright and once he was steady let go.
"You're wrong boss," Tony faced him, wiping his mouth of blood that was still running from his nose, "I do think. I think that second B of yours really does stand for bastard."
The false grin which punctuated this statement was enough to send Gibbs over the edge and back up again. He was all ready to make another callous comment about Tony's lack of brain power and throw his butt in the car to take to hospital when twin green eyes rolled back to show nothing but white and he pitched forward straight into his arms.
If Gibbs thought he was scared before, he was downright terrified now and left completely unguarded by the sudden change he let unabashed fear consume him.
"We need help over here!" He screamed at one of the uniforms who were on the scene.
Gibbs, with Tony's completely limp body in his arms, fell to the concrete and held him until paramedics, who were attending to their no longer missing Petty Officer, answered his calls for help.
.
DiNozzo had been out of it in the ER, which was packed with people when the ambulance crew had escorted them straight through to the treatment area. Gibbs keeping a firm grip on Tony's hand the entire way. He earned himself a few choice looks from various practitioners who dared to try and separate them, but that didn't bother Gibbs, let them think what they wanted. He was a marine and he wasn't about to let one of his own out of his sight for even a second while they were compromised, even in a hospital. He was far too aware of what happened the first time Tony had travelled to hospital alone and didn't want a repeat of the situation.
They were in a room waiting for the doctor to come back and tell them his scans where clean when Tony finally woke up. Gibbs watched him closely as he opened his eyes, realised where they were and immediately kick himself.
"Hey, welcome back." Gibbs kept his tone neutral, his concern tightly guarded.
"Well this is just perfect." Tony grumbled, sitting up on the bed hanging his legs over the edge and covering his face with both hands.
Gibbs pushed away from his sentry post in the corner of the room and approached, instinctually laying a hand affectionately on top of Tony's bent head. His jump of surprise alerted to Gibbs to the strangeness of what he was doing, but instead of pulling his hand back he left the weight where it was and proceeded to smooth down the messy gelled hair which stuck up at all angles thanks to all the activity giving him an extra two inches in height.
"Don't want them thinking you've been electrocuted" he covered, answering the scared confused smile he was getting from Tony.
"Of course not," Tony played along, still looking bemused and no doubt suspecting something was wrong, but not willing to tip his hand and call him on it just yet.
"Doc's have said you're okay, bruised, going be hurting a while but nothing serious, just waiting for some test results to confirm it." Gibbs dropped his hand back to his side and studied Tony's none reaction to the good news. "You were lucky. If the car had hit you head on we'd be looking at a body bag."
He felt stupid saying he was lucky to be honest, because though the nurses had done a good job of cleaning him up Tony still looked like a horror movie extra. His nose was swollen and purple looking, arms and legs scraped, the hospital gown was a pale yellow colour that did little to help Tony's own ghost like complexion. His own clothes were of course ruined, pants and shirt ripped, covered in blood and puke. When they'd asked Gibbs had instructed the nurse to burn the lot. Luckily Blackadder had gotten something right and managed to get another Agent to bring him something to wear home. When the doctor had said he would likely be released as long as the scan was clean Gibbs had demanded a second opinion, but as it turned out DiNozzo had had a lucky escape this time. His initial bout of unconsciousness had been brief and they'd given him something for the pain back in the ambulance which is why Tony had slept through most of the waiting around and was only just now waking up.
"What about Stuart?" Tony asked voice hoarse.
"Broken ankle, Blackadder's with him now until he can be transported back to NCIS, slipped on the ice after the car missed him." Gibbs smiled, knowing Tony would at least find that amusing.
"And the money?" Tony surprised him by not even letting that curl his lip.
"Pacci caught the mother trying to leave the apartment with most of it." He answered, though his thoughts weren't on the case.
Gibbs glared at Tony, a clear frown on his face as he studied him, eyes narrowing ever so slightly when Tony looked down and away as if ashamed.
"Hey, you okay Tony?" Gibbs queried, though it sounded like a stupid question to ask someone who had just been pushed down a flight of stairs and hit by a car Gibbs knew DiNozzo knew why he was asking.
Seeing the warm flush rise on already pale cheeks he couldn't help but think all of this could have been avoided if he'd just done as Ducky told him last night and spoke to the kid this morning.
"This about your father's email?"
"You saw that huh?" Tony said as if confirming a mere fact, not at all surprised by his knowledge.
"When were you going to tell me?"
Not were you, but when, because Gibbs knew Tony would come to him eventually. He always had done, since day one when he'd followed him to his partners home, not to bust either one of them, but to be there for him, to support him when the walls came crashing down and all that was left was to sink or swim.
"It's nothing boss," Tony slumped even further on the bed, to the point Gibbs was having to bend down to look him in the eye.
Another instinct overtook him at that moment and Gibbs acted upon it, smacking him in the head.
Tony raised his eyes to meet his and without his usual beaming smile sighed and said "I'll get over it."
Gibbs sighed himself, there wasn't a lot that upset Tony, not outwardly at least and not to the point he wouldn't even try to put up an 'I'll be fine front.' Not sure on the best way to proceed Gibbs took a shot in the dark and went for broke.
"Ducky's worried about you," The words came out sounding uncomfortable and natural to him, so bad he wanted to shoot Ducky right then for not forcing him to fix this sooner.
"Are you worried?" Tony shot back without pause.
Gibbs stared at him, but Tony's gaze never wavered, sharp despite the headache he must have at the very least despite pain killers. He was serious Gibbs realised. Tony was always after his attention, trying to get him to say something that might hint at caring, but he'd never had the guts to outright ask him, before now. By the desperate look in his eyes he was as raw and open emotionally as he'd ever seen him. Yet for some reason, instead of vulnerable he looked dangerous.
So shocked by that piercing look he apparently took too long to provide an answer, not that Tony gave him much time to assimilate the question, but never the less Tony turned away looking like he'd gotten his answer and had expected nothing less.
"Gibbs I'm fine now," Gibbs he noted, not 'Boss' as he come to expect in these moments.
"You're not fine DiNozzo," Gibbs took a step back, ensuring his hands remained firmly by his side.
"Well I'm not delirious or in pain anymore and if I'm not mistaken it's still Christmas Eve, there's still a chance one of us can have a Happy Holiday,"
Gibbs couldn't be sure which one of them he was talking about, but knowing DiNozzo the comments are almost always self-deprecating. "You're not in pain because of the drugs DiNozzo, and the doctor's going to be in here any minute, let's let her decide you get a merry Christmas shall we?"
He deserved a goddam Oscar for his performance there, managing to act like he didn't want to slap Tony silly for being such a class A idiot, and not just because he chased after a suspect without back-up, without regard for his own condition and ran head long into a main road to get hit by a car.
"What time is it?" Tony sounded panicked.
"7:30," Gibbs groaned, stretching.
"But we went to see the mom just before lunch…"
"Yep,"
Gibbs avoided looking at him head on, preferring to keep a subtle eye on him from the side instead.
"You didn't have to stay with me this whole time," Tony laid himself back down on the bed, managing to pull off sad disgruntled and childish all in one move.
"How'd you know I did?" Gibbs turned and grinned at him, but Tony's sad smile had him regretting the attempt at humour, he clearly wasn't in the frame of mind to understand he was only joking.
"What a perfect end to a perfectly crappy Christmas. Happy holiday's boss,"
Boss this time Gibbs noticed, there was still some hope to salvage this yet.
"What's eating you DiNozzo, and don't tell me it's nothing." Gibbs sighed settling himself back against the bed, looking down on Tony.
There wasn't a chance they were leaving before sorting this out.
"Thought you didn't care," Tony managed to both snap and whine at the same time.
Gibbs bit his tongue, keeping his instinctual impolite response to himself. Tony was pushing him to react on purpose and though his own experience with kids may be limited he could recognise a tired and upset one when they were right in front of him.
"I never said that." Gibbs said calmly, biting the inside of his cheek to keep that way.
It was clearly the right choice because without the kindling there was no fire and without fire Tony deflated, losing all his unused anger in one final vent.
"She wanted me to spend Christmas with her and her family, they a have house they go to every year, make snow man, have dinner, gifts and a bunch of other happy holiday stuff that I've never-" His brief rant winked out to a mere whisper.
Gibbs blinked. He'd been expecting something and being a good marine was prepared for anything, but he had his money on this being about the email from his dad. The one wishing his only son a Merry Christmas and informing him of all the fun he was having with his new wife and her family in Hawaii this year. Telling Tony he wouldn't be back until the New Year and he could call him then if he liked. It was the coldest, most unbelievable sorry excuse for self-promotion Gibbs had ever seen. One of those impersonal family newsletters, like one of his past sister in laws used to send out bragging about her family would have been kinder than that personal attack of pompous trash. From what he knew Tony's father hadn't spent a Christmas with him since he was a little kid and he had the nerve to send him that! The man was damn lucky he wasn't anywhere within sniper range. However, putting homicidal thoughts to one side for now, Gibbs had to focus. Tony was talking about the girl he'd been dating and recently parted ways with.
"Apparently not going was a deal breaker and I refused to go so…" He capped off his confession with a heavy sigh, like the whole world was weighing down on his not long turned thirty year old shoulders.
"Did you tell her why," it wasn't a question.
He thought he'd skip over all the usual exposition and just get to the heart of the matter. By now Tony knew he knew a lot more about him than he'd ever told. The fact he'd not only accepted Gibbs changing his next of kin notification two months ago from his father to himself, but also thanked him, said more than a whole discussion could and that's why he liked DiNozzo, the kid could talk for an Olympic sport, but when it came to things that mattered he was surprisingly and pleasantly succinct.
"No," Tony answered, rolling onto his side so his back was to the door and Gibbs could no longer see his face. "Not the real reason anyway."
"And what's that?" Gibbs kept his face forward, taking note of the shivers running through taught muscles and the way his arm curled around his belly.
"Don't you already know?" Tony snapped, a breathy reply that had Gibbs willing the doctor to show her face again soon.
"Why don't you tell me," he pushed again, if nothing else than to keep him distracted and talking.
"Her Dad," Tony paused, letting the weight of the word hang between them, "He's rich, has several businesses and goes to lots of cocktail parties, not to mention has a few mistresses that apparently aren't spoken about."
The bitterness when he said mistresses was hard to miss.
"Like your father." Gibbs stated firmly, settling his hand in the small of Tony's back and rubbing gently.
"Like my father." Tony echoed distantly, finally giving in and chucking up what was left in his stomach.
Gibbs had already placed a basin under his chin, having noticed the signs before he rolled over, thinking he could hide the fact he was going to puke again. Gibbs shook his head and kept up the rubbing motion, not smiling exactly, but not frowning either, Tony would eventually learn there was very little he could keep from him.
Once done Tony sat up with a sniff and took the water Gibbs offered before running a hand over his red eyes. He remained settled against the bed, where he'd been the entire time silent, watching, waiting, imagining the thoughts, dreams, memories that had likely been running through Tony's head since receiving that email from his father and then dealing with a girlfriend who had no idea who Tony really was. He wished he could have known about all of this sooner so as to prevent him from trying to punish himself by chasing a suspect until it nearly killed him, but wishes only counted in horse shoes and hand-grenades as his dad used to say.
"It's okay Tony." He said quietly.
Tony sighed, covering a small cry, "It really isn't Gibbs." he sniffed. "I thought after Wendy…"
But he snapped his jaw shut, a flush rising on his cheeks, whatever he'd been about to say he clearly wasn't ready for it to be heard. Gibbs watched him struggle internally for a minute then after giving him ample time and making no progress pushed away from the bed and stood in front of him. Taking his chin in one warm hand Gibbs forced Tony to look at him.
Looking him directly in the eye, soft smile gracing his lips Gibbs said with more force this time, "It's okay Tony."
.
The Present, Christmas day 2002…
"I remember the doctor telling me I had a concussion, but nothing after leaving the hospital."
Gibbs glared at him over his coffee mug, which had quickly replaced the book. "You fell back to sleep the second you got in the car."
"Oh." Tony puzzled that out, "so it's still Christmas?"
"For another," Gibbs checked his watch, "eight hours at least."
"Wow. I didn't miss it." Tony smiled, the honestly happy kind Gibbs wanted to see more often. "What about dinner?" He asked with renewed enthusiasm.
"Abby's coming round later, she's over at the retirement centre doing… something…" Gibbs shook his head. He had no idea what she was doing there. "Ducky's on his way with something you can eat, hopefully without throwing up."
Tony raised his eyebrows, but one look from Gibbs forestalled any comment. Then a frown appeared on his forehead.
"Wait, you still haven't explained this." He hinted at their sharing of the sofa, his feet still resting comfortably across Gibbs' lap.
Hey, if it didn't bother Gibbs it certainly didn't bother him.
"You'd prefer I left you at the hospital?" Gibbs' tone was terse, and avoided an answer entirely.
"No boss, thank-you, boss." He said quickly, wide eyed look fixed in place.
"The doctors gave you something for the pain DiNozzo." Gibbs explained after a sigh without spelling it out.
Tony frowned again, thinking, then… "Oh." he blanched, "Ooooh, I didn't?"
"You did." Gibbs confirmed bluntly, but thankfully without judgement.
"So you..?"
"Ahuh," Gibbs agreed without stating anything obvious.
It took a moment for him to assimilate all that. He'd had several bad reactions to pain killers over the past year, but one memory stood out clearly as the most embarrassing and he had made Gibbs promise that if he ever got that way again he was to shoot him.
"Thanks boss," Tony smiled shyly, thankful that though he hadn't done as promised and shot him, he had stayed with him and protected him from himself, which was more than he could ever ask for.
Gibbs threw him the TV remote, clearly having the same desire to not talk about it as he did.
"Shut up and watch your movie DiNozzo."
He pressed the on button and Tony cheered up on the spot upon seeing his favourite Christmas film flash up on Gibbs' old TV.
"You break into my apartment again, boss?"
"Your desk," he bit back, picking his book up from the coffee table.
"Got any popcorn?"
Gibbs lowered the book and glared.
"Shutting up Boss,"
Tony settled in, leaving his feet where they were and turning only slightly to face the TV. Seeing Gibbs lift his book again Tony risked one last comment before intending on doing just that.
"Merry Christmas"
.
A/N: well I hope you liked this as much as the first instalment. Posting a little earlier because I beat my own deadline for a change. I intentionally kept the medical details short so as not to draw focus from the real point of the story since it's only meant as a short piece. We can assume Tony was just really bloody lucky
For those that were wondering, yes there was some foreshadowing for s6 'Silent Night' the girlfriend in question here is of course the future wife of detective Kemp.
Ps. For those of you that are dying to know about Tony on pain meds as refed in this story but not explored – something that cannon hinted at in S5 - I can tell you the details will come out further into the series;)
Thanks again for reading! Until next week, ttfn x