When Vi said she had a slight tendency to cuddle things in her sleep, she'd been underestimating herself.
By like...
A lot.
Jason laid splayed under her prone body, contemplating how he was going to get out of bed to take a piss without her accidentally elbowing his bladder or waking her up. One thing he /did/ know was how scary she was in the mornings - he'd woken her up with a text once and she called just to scream at him for a solid five minutes. She fell asleep just before hitting the six minute mark, actually.
He very, very gently started to extract himself from Vi but she just held on tighter and mumbled something that sounded a lot like 'fucking no'.
"Vi, I have to pee."
"Water bottle." she yawned. "On the nightstand."
Jason spent a moment decoding that and then made a face. "Vi, I'm not pissing in a water bo-"
"I will punch you in the stomach until you pee yourself if you don't just shut the fuck up and do it. You know I will." Vi growled, and Jason recoiled from her a little.
"This is disgusting." he said under his breath, and the next minute or so was exceedingly awkward. It didn't help that she'd shoved her face into his armpit and started snoring.
A very cute, delicate snore.
But still a snore.
After a few minutes of feeling incredibly uncomfortable, he drifted back off to sleep.
When he woke again, Vi was straddling his stomach, poking his face and pushing and stretching it into funny shapes.
"You weren't kidding." he managed to get out with her pursing his lips.
"'bout what?"
"Being annoying."
She smacked him in the side of the head before dragging herself off him.
"Come on lazybones, we have things to do! Mainly eat. I buy chocolate in bulk, do you want to pick some out with me?"
"Chocolate for breakfast?" Jason asked, disbelieving. He'd never quite managed to believe the amount of chocolate she said she consumed.
Fifteen minutes later, he had no idea how she was still eating and did not doubt her.
"You're - how are you even doing that." he said flatly. "You have the metabolism of a hummingbird, I swear."
Vivian flipped him off with a slim finger before finishing her snickers.
"So, what's the plan for the day?"
"Well I was gonna go work out and train-"
"Train for what, you're working at a friggin craft store." Vi snorted.
And maybe he hadn't told her the /whole/ truth. Like the bit about how he was a vigilante currently destroying and taking over the criminals in Gotham.
"Well, you know." he said vaguely. "Can never be too careful and all."
"Admit it." Vi said, leaning in and winking. "You just wanna have hot acrobatic sex."
"I, uh-" was he blushing? He was way too old to be blushing about this. "What happened to the Vivian who nearly had a heart attack when I mentioned masturbation on skype?"
Vi turned bright red, jerking back so abruptly she nearly fell over, several strands of long sandy brown hair getting caught in her mouth.
"I'm just excited." she said defensively. "You know how I get."
And Jason nodded, because he remembered the pictures from disney land and how calm and delicate Vi just transformed into a force of nature. He'd aced all his tests that week, because Vi could be /terrifying/ when she was hopped up on adrenaline and happiness.
"The sugar high probably isn't helping."
Vi stared at him blankly.
"You know, how you just ate like three snickers and a box of chocolate covered peanuts?"
"Uh, protein." she said.
"Protein is like peanut butter-"
"I don't understand what you're getting at, they had peanuts /in/ them."
"I." Jason paused, having no defense against this elegentally simple and yet cutting retort.
"Anyways. What do you want to do today?"
"/I/ have work."
"Can I come?" Vi asked and fuck. Not the puppy dog eyes. He was helpless to even virtual puppy dog eyes.
"No, sorry - my boss is really strict about hanging out with friends on the job. We could do lunch, though?"
Maybe he could squeeze her in between training and kicking the shit out of some drug dealers on the east side. Probably. He could be a few minutes late to the ass kicking.
"I'll meet you at the chinese place on Maple Street, that okay?" Vivian asked.
"Yeah, of course. I'll text you at noon."
They exchanged phone numbers - there was no reason he couldn't send her texts between exercises - and headed their separate ways. Well, more like she took him out the backdoor and gave him a peck on the cheek to keep up appearances.
Alfred shook his head watching them. It wasn't healthy, he thought. First the young miss moves into Jason's bedroom, then when she finally does begin to move on she finds a boy who looks like him and brings him home... to Jason's bedroom?
Not healthy at all.