Hey thanks for all the reviews I'm very happy now then I know its It's been a million years since I last updated and I'm really sorry about that

Chapter 2

Confusion

My Grandfather did nothing. He just stared at me. He looked puzzled, like he didn't understand what I had just said. Probably because he didn't. As far as he knew Ray and I were good friends, much to his dislike of course. He continued to stare at me, taking in what I said very, very slowly. He let go of my hair slowly and stood upright, his eyes never leaving mine.

'Rape?' He asked, still puzzled. I nod. 'How co…why would…what?' He shook his head slowly. 'I thought the nenko Jin (did I spell that right? Let me know please thanks lol) was your friend.'

I nodded again, unable to speak. He continued to stare at me as though he did not know what to do. He might not know what to do. He appears to be in shock?' how could he possibly be shocked? When he found out about the butler had been abusing me he just flipped and beat the hell out of him, he may have even killed him. As for Boris, well his best friend got away with it. As far as I know my Grandfather told him to just told him to beat me, not rape. I think he only knows about the three occasions, Boris was careful not to get caught out. Could it be that that my Grandfather does care about me, to some extent? Could it be, he worry's about my mental health?…probably not, he did send me to the abbey after all.

I think he doesn't want me to be raped in case I turn out gay. He absolutely hates homosexuals. He wants me to be a father. Too bad for him then.

He finally took his eyes off my tearful face. 'You let a weakling like him, rape you?'

'I was to ill to fight him off.' I cried, my voice breaking half way through.

'Ill?' He repeated.

'I had a fever.' I replied, my voice failing.

'When?' H e asked roughly. I did not respond. 'When did he attack you boy?' He asked again raising his voice.

I choked back my tears. 'Two months ago but it wasn't hi…'

I couldn't finish my sentence, my voice box had clicked off completely. All I could do was sob weakly in front of Grandfather.

'And this is why you've been acting like a basket case? Hiding up here and refusing to see them.' 'Them' of course are my friends. 'This is why you have been failing in your school work.' He continued angrily.

I look down to avoid his viscous eyes. Why wont my voice let me tell him everything? 'Grandson, get yourself cleaned up!' he stormed out of my room, slamming my door behind him. I cried hard into my pillow.

How stupid and weak of me! I'm not even strong enough to tell him the truth. Yes, Ray raped me but Tala told me he was forced into it. I don't know if that's true though. I don't know what to believe. I'm confused, I'm scared. I love Ray. He wouldn't hurt me. He must have raped me because…because he knew I wouldn't sleep with him so early in our relationship. He knew about the butler raping me, I told him and he knew I would still be traumatised by it. He didn't want to wait for me so it's my fault! My fault! it's always my fault! If I only I was ready, he wouldn't have to force himself on me.

Grandfather called me a basket case. How am I a basket case? Just because I've been used a toy by Boris, guards at the abbey and the butler doesn't make me a basket case!!

In my rage, I threw my bedside lamp hitting…Bryan!?!

H e gasped loudly as the lamp explodes against his body. I froze. His arms are both cut. He lifts his hand up and his mouth is wide open. He starts making strange noises and bends his knees, one at a time. He then clenched his hands into a tight fist. 'Eeeyeeeeyeeeyeeyeeeeyeeyee!'

I finally figured out why he is acting so strange, he's trying not to scream. If my Grandfather heard him he would come barging in and drag him out by the hair. Bryan has been banned form the house er mansion, for breaking a vase, setting the kitchen on fire, blowing the garden shed up and breaking the bathroom door down while Grandfather was in the middle of doing a poo. Not a pretty sight.

'Woooooheeeeeyashaaaaroooogaaaa!!!'

If I wasn't so upset I'd be laughing my head off at him. 'Bryan I'm sorry!' I sobbed.

'That! Was really, really sore.' Bryan said though clenched teeth.

'I'm sorry I didn't mean it I didn't see you!' I apologised desperately. I didn't want to lose another friend.

'Hey now. Come on it's alright.' He walked over to me and pulled me into a hug, covering me in blood. 'It's not your fault. You didn't know I was here.' He told me soothingly.

'But it is my fault!' I argued. 'Everything's my fault!' My voice was muffled by Bryan's shirt.

'No. oh no, no, no, no, no, nooo.' Bryan took face in his hands and bent down to my level. 'Nothing's your fault. Do you think it's you fault Ray hurt you?' I nod, again. 'It's not, he didn't Ra-hurt you on purpose.'

'He didn't?' I asked hopeful that Ray does love me and our friendship can be saved.

'Of course not, he loves you.'

'How do you know?' I asked almost inaudibly.

My bedroom swung open. 'Kai do yo…' My Grandfather paused. Bryan and I stared at him. 'WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE?' He roared.

'AAAAH!!' Bryan ran to my window and forced it open. I immediately protested.

'BRYAN NO! WE'RE TWO STORIES UP!'

He stopped and looked down. 'Oh crap!' Grandfather marched towards him. I didn't know what to do, luckily Bryan had a back up plan. 'PEPPER SPRAY!' He pulled pepper spray out of his pocket and sprayed Grandfathers face. He pushed past, gave me a quick one arm hug and dashed out of my door.

After Bryan left, Grandfather swore all the swears under the sun. He washed his face, still swearing and I got showered and got into clean clothes. I sat on my bed, waiting for his next demands. He called me down, I found him in the kitchen, but he wasn't alone.

'Ah, young Kai. Voltaire was just telling me about what Ray did to you.' Boris greeted in a very good mood.

'Hm. Yes well I'll deal with that bastard. Kai stay away from you little friends. I will not have my grandson being sexually assaulted.'

Yeah right, you didn't do anything about Boris. I glare at them, hating every cell in their bodies.

'Excuse me one minute I've left my mobile phone in my bedroom.' Grandfather stood up from the kitchen table and left the room.

I walk over to the cupboard and take a glass out, Boris came up behind me. He placed one hand around my waist and the other on my face, creepily stroking my face. I could feel my heart race, my stomach churned. His hand around my waist found it's way into my trousers. I shake from fear and dread. I pray silently for my Grandfather to come back. Boris puts his dry lips against my neck.

'I wish I could take you to your room.' He smirked and groped my front area painfully. He hand on my face was now stroking my arm with one finger slowly. I can feel my tears prickling at the back of my eyes. 'It's been a while since we've done it. I'm going back to Russia in a few days time for some business, we need to find some time alone.' He licked my neck. His horrible wet slimy tongue moving up slowly made my stomach turn even more. I just want him off.

He moved away from me and sat down, Grandfather's footsteps were approaching. I wipe my neck with my sleeve, Boris chuckled, amused by this. Grandfather took his seat at the table and looked at me. He seemed to be thinking about something. I stared back for a while before realising I was holding a glass. I jumped when Boris spoke. 'So Voltaire, why did you call me over?'

'I see that your still trying to take over the world. I must say you nearly succeeded, that is until my grandson and his little team stopped you. I'm unimpressed.'

'Where are you going with this?' Boris asked him as I filled my glass with orange juice.

'You haven't been doing very well in life. You've lost millions of my money with that ridiculous plan of your's. You failed with the abbey, costing me more money and questions from the police. You've been abusing my grandson when I only asked you to beat him.' I winced when he said abusing and beat.

'Voltaire, I know I have cost you a lot, and I've only touched him three times…'

'He's been screaming in his sleep yelling for you to get off him, I went through into his room to shut him up and he said something about his birthday. As far as I know you haven't touched him on his birthday.'

I cant remember telling him that!

'It's just his dream. I swear I'm not abusing him in that way.' Boris protested his 'innocence'.

'You've always had an unhealthy interest for him.'

'I haven't been raping him!' Boris continued to protest.

My Grandfather glared at him and I decided to make a quick exit, until Grandfather spoke to me. 'Kai. Has he raped you more than three time?'

Yes, so what? Like you care. He raped me everyday. My heart started to race again, he knew when I was lying. What will he do if he see's through my lie? I looked in his direction, not his eyes though. 'No. Grandfather.'

'You're a terrible liar Kai.'

Boris's eyes widened. 'What?'

'I don't believe him. I think you have been abusing him.' My Grandfather seemed amused by this. I made my way to the door way. 'Where are you going? I never said you can leave.' He snapped at me. I stopped and looked at him, why cant he just let me go? He turned his attention back to Boris. 'I'm sick of you wasting my time and money. The beatings at the abbey were enough to turn the boy's emotions off not rape.' He was getting angry, about Boris raping me? Did he hit his head this morning?

'So what? Yes I fucked the boy, but who cares? Why are suddenly attacking me over this? You've never cared about his welfare, you sent him to the abbey for fuck sake. Why are bothered about whether I raped him or not?' Boris asked raising his voice.

'Because I don't want him to turn out gay…' I knew it! 'and I don't want him in a mental hospital.' Wait what? 'He is my grandson. I want him to be safe.' He's on drugs.

I couldn't make any sense of this. The beatings, the name calling, the using me as a lab rat, the using me as a tool for world domination, sending me too the abbey, now he's saying he cares for me? Why is he saying all of this? He hates me! He only wants me to take over the stupid business. Why is he acting like this? Out of character? Is all an act to trick me into thinking I'll be safe from beatings from on? A cruel sick joke where they'll burst out laughing and attack me? I watched the argument go on, completely confused and lost.

My Grandfather look at my face, god know what my expression is like. He looked back at Boris then back at me. He seemed to be thinking about something. Boris finally broke the silence. 'Well? What's brought this on? You want him to be safe?'

Grandfather frowned. 'Of course I do. I love him.'

I dropped my glass, it smashed on the floor louder than I expected. The glass flew everywhere, my trousers got drenched in juice. Nevertheless, I couldn't take my eye's off my Grandfather. I was in complete shock. Frozen to the spot. It took a long time for me to realise I had just broke a glass. Those three words wouldn't leave my mind as I looked down at the pool of orange and glass. Those three words I have never heard go past his lips. Those three words he said so easily, as though he has said them before. Even Boris was shocked. His mouth was wide open. I stared dumbly at the mess below me. My Grandfather was unfazed by his own words.

'Kai.' I looked up, 'Clear the mess up.' He spoke almost the same way as Tyson's Grampa would only he would say:

'Yo, Tyson ma little man, clear that mess up will ya dude?' or something like that…

I hesitated before kneeling down to pick up the glass. Boris spoke. 'You love. Him?'

'Yes.' My grandfather said slowly. 'Is that a problem? Would you prefer it if it were you loving him? Only I don't love him in that way.'

I grabbed a hand full of glass, not concentrating one bit. Was he referring to the abuse? I think he was.

'I don't understand.' Boris replied. I'm with him.

'It's very simple Boris, he is my grandson and it is my job to protect him. Shall we finish this in the study?' He stood up and made his way to the door, stopped and waiting for Boris to stand. He eventually did get up and followed. As Grandfather made his way past me, I looked at up to see him…smiling at me!! A friendly smile! If that wasn't shocking enough the next thing stopped my heart beating and caused my brain to malfunction. He ruffled my hair!!

He ruffled my hair!!

It was so weird. I'm scared of him when he's angry, disappointed, happy and about almost every other emotion I can think of. But when he's nice to me? Which isn't even an emotion, but when he's nice to me, which is never I'm terrified of him. I don't think I've ever been so confused in my life. Actually I have, Tyson and Max talking about 'I cant believe it's not butter' was extremely confusing. I'm not even going to think about it…

Grandfather made his way down the hallway and Boris glared at me as he walked by. Once they were out of sight, I looked back down at my hand to find blood dripping on the floor. I picked up the remains of my glass and put them in the bin. I got a cloth and wiped up the orange juice and blood with my cut free hand. I rinsed my hand under the tap and wrapped a dish cloth around it. I needed bandages, they were in the upstairs bathroom, next to my Grandfather's study.

I made my way slowly up the stairs, wondering what they were talking about. I went into the bathroom and opened the medicine cupboard. No first aid kit. Grandfather must have been using it at some point, it was always in here. I would have to ask him where it is. I went to study and opened the door just in time to see my grandfather pull the trigger on Boris.

BANG!