Chapter 2 Don't look away

"Oh man, this is not going to be easy." I mumbled to myself the next day as I laid there in bed staring up at the ceiling with my hands under my head while Eric laid beside me, seemingly dead for the day while I struggled to come to terms with the suggestion he made just a few hours ago. I turned my face towards his still form, taking in the sight of his peaceful expression and sighed. "How am I suppose to make this choice with you?"

I should have been sleeping at this point, it was well after dawn by the time Eric had fallen into sleep mode for the day and given that I had been up all night with him, I should have been asleep at his side as well. But that wasn't the case because as soon as he dropped that idea on me that he wanted to get married right away, I hadn't been able to stop my mind from going off in a million different directions and that in turn had kept me from rest. But that was ok for now because I didn't want to waste precious time sleeping when I could be using it to think through this crazy idea he had come up with. And I needed as much time as I could get because Eric would be expecting an answer by tonight and if I ended up wanting to go through with it while we were here then I needed to decide today. We were only going to be here for another few days and if we were going to take this next step, then I needed to be sure. And the only way to be sure was to look at every aspect of it.

I won't lie, when Eric first said those words to me, my very immediate thought was how romantic it was. Eric didn't often let himself get vulnerable with me and say directly what was on his mind, at least not before I read his thoughts. But to hear him offer it up first was so nice and sweet. It was a change to how he use to be with me and I recognized how hard it was for him to get to that point. Eric wasn't the type of vampire to want this kind of relationship, especially not with how many women he had been with in his lifetime. So when he asked me to marry him and then wanted to make it official so soon, was a true testament to how much he had changed. It was so romantic that someone like him didn't want to waste any more time in taking the next step with me. I was so moved by that and I was really honest with myself, then I have to admit that I didn't really want to wait either. I mean, look at our history. There had never been a really long stretch of time where trouble didn't come calling and I had a feeling it would always be like that. But it that was the case then I didn't want to be looking over my shoulder alone any more. I wanted Eric there as my husband and with our luck and history, if we waited then we may never get the chance to do it. Something was always trying to get at us, trying to keep us from this moment. And I wanted to basically say to the universe to go fuck off and let me have my happy ending.

But even with that way of thinking, my mind couldn't help but go in the opposite direction and think of the consequences my actions would have if I went ahead and married Eric this soon. Because no matter how hard I tried to suppress it, my logical side kicked in and I couldn't help but think of how I always envisioned my life turning out when it came to the idea of marriage.

I wasn't one of those girls who grew up constantly thinking about marriage but it did cross my mind on occasion and whenever it did, I had always thought that my friends and family would be there. I never really wanted a big ceremony, but I always wanted to have plenty of people around to witness this next stage in my life. But it was mostly Sookie I was thinking about and how hurt she would be that she wasn't thought of when I was considering this. If anything, she was the main constant that had remained in my image of marriage over the years as our family died out and our friends came and gone but she had always been there in my mind when I thought of getting married. And I knew that if I made it official and she wasn't there for it then it would hurt her feelings. It was one of the things that was keeping me from immediately agreeing to it.

"This is too hard. I'm too torn." I grumbled, rolling over on my side to face Eric. He looked so peaceful and out of it, unaware of the confusion I was in. I felt my face stretch out in a yawn and it occurred to me that if I got a few hours of sleep then perhaps my thinking would be a little more clear. So I moved over so I could lay my head on his chest and closed my eyes, vowing to think it through more when I woke up.

Back in Shreveport

"You know, we have to stop meeting like this."

Louie couldn't stop the smile from spreading across his face as he looked ahead on the path he had been walking on and caught sight of Helen's dazzling blonde hair peeking out from behind a tree as she stepped in his way. He hadn't been expecting to see her at all tonight when he had set out from his house to spend the night walking in the woods. But there she was just like she had been the first night they crossed paths and just like the other night, she was alone. He found that as he came to a stop, that he was actually glad to see her. Ever since they had learned the truth, he had been gradually trying to get to know her again and each time they talked, he got closer to knowing her the way he use to. Granted it was at a much slower pace then it was the first time a thousand years ago, mostly because there had been so many years where they had been separated and they were quite literally strangers to one another. But there was also the element of them both having their guard up at the moment. He because he wasn't quite ready to let her all the way in after her betrayal, but he wasn't sure why she was holding back. He knew she was, he could still tell that even after all this time. He could only hope that more nights spent talking would break down those walls she had up against him for whatever reason that may be.

"I think you're the one who is purposely going out of her way to run into me." He said jokingly to her, watching as she approached him with an easy smile on her face reminiscent of her old self. He wouldn't say that out loud of course. "And correct me if I'm wrong, but I do believe that stalking is illegal in this state."

"You should be honored that I would take the time to seek you out." She shot back, her lips twitching upward into a slightly devious smirk that he wouldn't have thought she was capable of making. "I don't spy on many vampires unless I find them particularly interesting."

"Then I guess I'm the lucky one." Louie stated with his arms crossed, enjoying the light banter they had going on. Their first few moments of reunion had been heavy with emotion, so it was nice to take a break from that and just be a little bit carefree. "Well, besides Godric of course."

"Oh yea, can't forget him." Helen nodded, her smile brightening at the mention of the other vampire and for just a second, seeing that smile on her face because of Godric made a flash of jealousy go through him. But it soon went away as Helen asked. "So how are things going with you two? Are you mending your friendship?"

"I guess so, I mean it's such a slow progress that you almost wouldn't think it's even happening but it is. I just think it will be a while before he and I can ever hope to be the way we use to be." Louie explained, thinking of his last talk with Godric. Even though they had both agreed they wanted to mend their bond, Louie knew it was going to take more then just one talk before things were fixed. And perhaps it never fully would get back to its previous strong status, but Louie was at least willing to give it a shot, especially since Godric wasn't completely at fault for their estrangement. He looked back up at Helen and asked "So what about you and him? Are you guys bonding again?"

"Like you said, it's a slow progression back to how we all use to be and while I want my friendship with him to be back to normal, I know it won't happen overnight or any time soon." Helen replied, tucking her long hair back behind her ear before speaking again. "It's getting there, but I have to be patient with both of you. It's not about me, it's about you and him."

"It will take time, but it will happen. You'll see." Louie found himself saying, wanting to give her hope so she would know her efforts weren't going to be in vain. He knew eventually he would forgive her, once they got to know each other again. And he wasn't going to pretend like he would forever hold a grudge because that wouldn't be the truth. He still cared for her and one day they would find their way back to each other and perhaps learn to love each other again. But until then, they would try being friends first. He forced a smile out on his lips before saying. "So where is that ever absent progeny of yours? Did you send him out to the bar again?"

"Not tonight. He's actually out...feeding on humans. He never could get use to the synthetic blood." Helen told him hesitantly, her words cutting through his head and he actually found a slight frown on his face from this explanation. Helen must have guessed what was going on in his mind because she hurriedly said. "But don't worry, he knows to be careful. He doesn't drain the humans if that's what you're thinking. He just likes to find the willing ones to drink from."

"I was just surprised that's all. I can't picture you having a progeny that you allow to feed on humans like that." Louie answered honestly, trying not to make a face that would betray his thoughts. He didn't think Gabriel was bad at all, in fact the few times he had been in the younger vamp's presence, Louie found him to be sort of like himself. But it was the fact that Helen let her child feed on human blood that was the problem. But he would try to hide that. "But then again I have a hard time picturing you with a progeny at all."

"He needs to feed and I'm not going to deny him that just because some people think it's wrong." Helen said almost defensively, taking on a look befitting to a vampire who was fiercely protective of her child. She looked at him and shrugged. "Besides, we all did it at some point before True Blood was created, it was for survival. Gabriel just chooses to survive on real blood. Nothing wrong with that."

"I'm not judging anyone, I was just surprised that's all and you seemed to take it personally." Louie frowned upon seeing her reaction to his statement. She jumped on it so fast that it made him almost suspicious. "Why? Is that how you survive still?"

"Come on Louie, we may have been apart for a thousand years and you didn't know I had become a vampire, but let's be serious..." Helen raised her eyebrows at him almost in amusement. "Can you picture me being that way?"

"I guess not." Louie pressed his lips together and drew his brows down low. Something was off in the way she answered it and he couldn't quite put his finger on what it was. "It just seems weird that a progeny would still hunt humans and a maker doesn't."

"Well, Gabriel and I may have a close bond, but we're different vampires." Helen moved her small shoulders upward again. "What he does and what I do are of our own choosing. We try not to influence each others choices."

"And in all the years since you turned him, you never..." Louie felt that old flash of jealousy go through him as a foreign but still relevant thought passed through his head. "I mean, you and Gabriel were never...together?"

"Are you serious? Gabriel is my child. I would never..." Helen's jaw fell open before she could even complete her sentence as she appeared outraged that he would even think that. She had a small glare on her face when she spoke again. "I have never been intimate with Gabriel, so don't even go there."

"Ok, calm down." Louie held up his hands defensively. "I was merely asking out of curiosity."

"Sure you were."

Back in London

"Oh god what a day it has been." I grumbled to myself as I laid in a heap on the bottom of the bath tub, trying and failing to clear my head long enough to make a sound decision about what I wanted to do. This was why I had decided to take a bath, hoping the hot water and sweet smelling soaps would help relax me but it was too no avail. The water had cooled down and I was no closer to figuring out my end decision then I had when I had been in bed earlier today. It also didn't help that I was constantly going back and forth about whether this was a good idea of not.

My mind kept on replaying all the events that had transpired over the last year and even before that, since Eric and I had first got together. So much had happened in such a short time and the two of us had both changed. I barely recognized the person I use to be when I thought about the beginning when the trouble had started with the Fellowship of the Sun, I was so timid and passive and I rarely ever stuck up for myself. I hardly was strong enough to leave Eric when it was unclear if he wanted Sookie or me. And I hadn't thought I could handle the move to Mystic Falls or any of the events that came after that leading up to Godric's resurrection. But I had taken it all in stride and dealt with it better then I could have imagined. I was learning to take life's blows and come back from it, something I don't think I would have been able to do had I not started this whole journey with Eric. And I was grateful for it.

But I think it was Eric who had changed the most in our time together and apart. In the beginning he was this cocky, egotistical, manipulative vampire who was use to getting his way and truth be told not that much had changed in that aspect of his personality. But what had evolved was his ability to open up to a few select group of people and I was lucky enough to be included in that group. I knew his history with women and I knew how he could be and I was hesitant to get involved with him from the start because of this. But then things gradually started to change and I saw a different side of him. He was willing to admit that he cared about me and was more then willing to protect me at any cost. Not to mention that when he finally admitted his love for me after my rescue from Steve Newlin, it really changed things. And every moment after that had slowly but surely brought us closer together. Even the bad things had helped make our bond stronger even when I couldn't tell it at the time. And it was this change in Eric over time that had brought us to this point and now it was up to me to decide where to take it next.

After all we have been through with secrets and lies, battles and pain, reunions and re-emergences, it was only fair that we deserved to get something for ourselves for once. And this wedding could be it, if you could even call it a wedding. Eric wasn't the type of vampire to want a huge crowd around him when he married and I knew he would only agree to it if he thought it was what I wanted. He loved me enough to do something that made him uncomfortable and I found that so incredibly sweet. Not to mention I kind of liked the idea of doing something out of character for myself. I was always so responsible and thought everything through and never did anything spur of the moment. So to go through with this would be the ultimate stepping out of my comfort zone. And besides, even if we waited another few weeks or months, the end result would still be the same. He and I would still end up being married and probably without anyone else there.

So why not go ahead and do it?

Back in Shreveport

"Can you believe he actually said that?" Helen exploded at Godric the moment she had finished relaying her conversation with Louie to him and was now awaiting his reaction to back up her reasoning that Louie was crazy. "I mean he actually insinuated that he thought Gabriel and I had slept together at some point."

"You need to calm down and not take this so personally. It's not that big a deal." Godric said gently to her, speaking for the first time since she had met up with him on the outskirts of town to talk about what had happened. And she had left no detail out, needing to get it all out of her system so she could make sense of it all. And he had simply stood there on that empty stretch of road with nothing to see but fields of tall grass, while she stalked around him in circles, yelling about the conversation she had had earlier that night. And in typical Godric fashion, he had responded in a calm and collected manner. "So why are you making it a bigger deal then it has to be?"

"Because he almost seemed jealous, that's why!" Helen exclaimed, her voice echoing through the quiet night air as she whirled around to face the vampire she had come to for comfort. "He sounded jealous at the thought of me being intimate with any other vampire besides him. Even my own progeny."

"He probably was jealous. And even though he and I haven't been friends all this time, even I can still see that he loves you. I don't think he ever stopped." Godric smiled so brightly at her that it took her by surprise, but not nearly as much as his words did. She got the feeling that Louie still cared about her. But love? That was something she doubted and she couldn't blame him. Not after what she had done. "Louie won't admit it to you or even himself, but it's obvious enough if you look closely."

"Well that doesn't really mean anything now does it?" She almost snapped, closing her eyes tightly as she rubbed the sides of her head, imagining a pain coming on from the emotions running through her this entire night. "But it wasn't just that part of the conversation that bothered me. It was when we were talking about how Gabriel was out feeding on human blood tonight and how I have allowed him to do that that made the conversation tense. And once that topic came up, it brought back some very fresh memories."

"What kind of memories?" Godric questioned, his young face growing curious as he stepped closer to her. "From your past?"

"Remember how I said I hated myself for what I had done? Well, these memories are constant reminders of some of my worst moments." Helen explained, her shoulders sinking under the weight of what the talk with Louie had brought up. She never wanted to remember what she had done once she decided to show herself again and she certainly never imagined having this conversation with Godric, someone she once had a very intimate history with. But with how close they had been getting in the last few days, she felt like if there was anyone she could talk to about this then it would be him. She couldn't look at him as she said this. "I use to like and I still kind of like to lure men into my clutches. Or more accurately into my bed for the sole purpose of feeding on fresh blood. I use to like taking my pain and anger out on them before I would finally kill them. I don't torture them anymore, but I still seduce these men and feed on them. And Louie bringing up the idea of intimacy made all those memories come flooding back."

"And now you're worried that things will get worse with him if he knows you not only still feed on humans but also because you've been intimate with people other then him." Godric nodded in complete understanding, not judging her in the slightest like she knew he would. He had his own dark past to contend with and was in no position to pass judgment on anyone's actions. And that made it easier to unload to him. But his clear insight on her worries about Louie knowing this side of her was so on point it was scary. "Am I right?"

"You are so right, almost terrifyingly right." She couldn't stop her mouth from dropping open. It amazed her that Godric still seemed in tune to her thoughts after all this time. She raised an eyebrow at him. "How did you nail that one so well?"

"Despite a thousand year old separation, I still know how your mind works and how you still feel about Louie." Godric grinned brightly at her, his expression putting her a little more at ease. "Face it Helen, I know you too well."

"I'm glad about that." She replied, pushing her hair back when it blew in front of her face. She knew she wasn't a mystery to Godric even though they hadn't seen each other this whole time. "It's nice to know we haven't completely lost touch."

"I don't think we ever will." Godric reached out and patted her shoulder in the friendliest of ways. "You and I will work through our issues, but I think its safe to say by now that we are going to be friends for life."

Bon Temps

"Well...this has been quite an interesting evening." Nan Flanagan's cool and collected voice said out loud across the table as she sat facing Sookie and Bill with her eyebrows raised in question. "Care to speak at all tonight my King?"

"Only to inquire why you are exactly here." Bill spoke up for the first time since the AVL representative had arrived on their front porch with an armful of paperwork and a guarded expression on her face that suggested that she had more to say then to simply make things formal and legal with his new position. Sookie had the common sense to stay quiet during the time Nan was speaking but she stayed close to her husband's side as per his request. Bill kept his hand on her knee under the table to ensure they were always connected in some way. "I have signed all the formal paperwork that brings me to position as King and I have been informed of my duties so I have to question why you are still here."

"Ok you got me. I do have one other matter to discuss." Nan admitted, her expression never changing besides a small flicker of triumph in her eyes that made Sookie wonder just what the female vamp had in store for her husband. "We have problem here in Shreveport. There is a group of necromancers meeting up in a shop downtown and I believe they could prove to be a threat to vampires."

"If they haven't caused any trouble nor made any attempt on a vampire's life then I see no reason to think they ever will." Bill responded in the way that Sookie knew he would. Bill tended to let cooler heads prevail in the face of trouble or at least in what other people perceived to be trouble. He may have been hundreds of years younger then Nan, but he wasn't about to stand down from her. "There is no reason for us to put ourselves in their business unless we have a reason to."

"We do have a reason to, they're necromancers and at any moment they could decide to turn around and use their magic to control us." Nan exclaimed, her closed fist coming down on the table top so loudly that Sookie found herself jumping. "They are powerful enough to do that. You know the history of necromancers Bill. You know what they are capable of."

"That was hundreds of years ago, they don't practice that kind of witchcraft any more. They're peaceful now." Bill insisted, clearly not willing to believe that there was as much of a threat as Nan thought there was. "Who are these people anyway? Where is their place of practice?"

"It's called Moon Goddess Emporium, not that it makes a difference what the hell its called." Nan waved off Bill's comment as it meant nothing to her or the situation but it was this name that made Sookie sit up straight and speak for the first time.

"Moon Goddess Emporium? I know that place." She stated so casually that she barely noticed the sharp looks both Bill and Nan were giving her. "A woman I work with is a witch and she has mentioned that place before in passing. Her name is Holly and she worked along side vampires in this battle a few months ago. And if she belongs to this group then there is no way that they can be a threat."

"Yes well that's all warm and fuzzy but your opinion doesn't really matter when it comes to this type of business." Nan replied harshly, rolling her eyes sarcastically as she dismissed Sookie's statement with a nod. "The fact is that there has never really been a gathering of necromancers in many years and now that there has, we have to take it seriously. And if we don't then it could prove to be our undoing."

"So what do you suggest I do?" Bill asked, leaning forward with his hands clasped together on the table as he stared intently at her. "Go storming in there and demand that they stop meeting?"

"Of course not, taking them by surprise like that could be the catalyst that we don't need." Nan frowned, tapping her long red fingernails on the wood as she sat back in the chair. "I want you to have it investigated and if they prove to be practicing necromancy, then you will intervene."

"Alright, I will look into it." Bill agreed, not looking happy about it but probably thinking it was best not to fight Nan on this. He turned his head away from Nan and looked at Sookie for a moment before saying. "I will gather all the Sheriffs in the state and discuss how to best deal with this matter."

"Get Northman first, he is quite a crafty little bitch when he wants to be. He could be a good ally for you." Nan stated with a coy smile, getting up from her seat and gathering up the files stacked in front of her. "Where is he by the way? Apparently he hasn't shown his face at Fangtasia in a few nights and that little whore of a progeny of his is in charge."

"He is on vacation...with his fiancee." Sookie offered as a way to move Nan along and out of their house if she had answers to whatever questions she put out there. "But he should be returning very soon."

"Hmm, well make sure you inform him of the situation as soon as he does. I want him involved with this." Nan told them as she headed towards the front door but before she left, she looked back at them and said with a smirk. "Don't screw this up Bill. Or there will be consequences."

And with that she left, slamming the door behind her and leaving Sookie to wonder if Bill had made a real mistake in accepting this position as King.

Back in London

I was sitting on a chair across the room from the bed, with my legs crossed and my hands playing with my hair just waiting for the moment for Eric to wake up so we could talk. A lot had been going through my mind today and I had finally arrived at a decision. Now I just needed him to wake up so I could tell him.

It wasn't an easy decision to make. But then again nothing in my life had ever been easy. And deciding when to marry shouldn't have been difficult, but it had been. There were just so many factors to take in that it made the choice harder then it probably should have been. Maybe I was over thinking it, maybe I was over analyzing every little thing. But I knew if I hadn't taken the day to think it all the way through then I would have made a decision that wasn't based on a thorough exploration of how I felt. And I didn't want to move forward with any regrets. So I thought about it and obsessed over it and generally argued every side of it I could and it was only an hour ago when I had arrived at my final choice. And I felt at peace with it. Even knowing that when I finally said it out loud, it was going to bring out hurt feelings, but that couldn't be helped. For once I was thinking about what I wanted and this was what I felt was going to be right for me. I just had to wait for Eric to wake up so I could...

"If I wasn't a thousand year old vampire, and I woke up and found you sitting there staring at me, then I would be beyond freaked out." Eric's voice interrupted me from my haze and brought me back out of my head only to find him sitting on the edge of the bed with his arms crossed over his chest and a questioning smirk on his face. "So what's the deal? Why are you just sitting there like that?"

"I was waiting for you to wake up so I could talk to you and I just sort of got distracted by my own thoughts." I admitted, getting up from the chair feeling thrilled that he was finally awake so I could talk to him about my choice. I walked over to the bed and stood before him, a little apprehensive about having this talk as I knew it would set in motion things that couldn't be undone now that I had decided. "Eric, I thought about what you said last night. And I did think about it all day and I..."

"You decided you didn't want to do it. Right?" Eric sounded calm but I could see in his eyes that he was feeling disappointed before I was even allowed to finish speaking. I couldn't read his thoughts as he had completely blocked me off but I knew him well enough to know how he was going to react. "You don't want to get married while we're here. It's not you and I should have known that before I even suggested..."

"Eric Northman, will you shut the hell up?" I exclaimed, not able to suppress my laughter as I stepped forward and grabbed the sides of his face in my palms, forcing him to keep his eyes on me before I said. "You didn't let me finish. Because if you had then you would have heard me say that I do want to marry you here."

"You do?" Eric's eyes watched my face as if he was feeling suspicious that I was just toying with him and he remained guarded for a while and just stared at me. But after a while it seemed to dawn on him that I wasn't taking it back and I felt his fingers curl over my wrists as he pulled my hands away from his face. "You're actually serious about this? You want to do something crazy and spontaneous for once?"

"Spontaneous, yes. Crazy no. It's not crazy because I've wanted to marry you for a long time and whether we wait a few weeks or months or we do it while we're here, the end result is still the same. I still get you as my husband." I said with a smile, allowing him to pull me in close and I settled on his lap with my arms locked around his neck and my face leaning against his. It had taken a lot for me to come to this decision but once I allowed it in, I knew it was right for me and for us as a couple. Eric and I were going to be our own family, our own unit. An didn't waste any more time not making it official. I looked in to his eyes and before I could talk myself out of it, I said. "So what do you say? Are you still in?"

"You know I am. I did suggest it after all." He reminded me, his blue orbs suddenly flaring up with excitement and I was flooded with an unexpected surge of happiness that wasn't my own. His arms tightened around me, clearly thrilled that he was getting what he wanted. "This is great! When exactly did you plan on wanting to do this? The last night we're here or the..."

"How about tomorrow night?" I asked in interruption, causing him to lean back away from me in clear and obvious shock. It was a very rare occasion when I was able to stump the great Eric Northman and tonight was one of those moments. And I have to say I was liking it. I placed my hands on his shoulders to get his attention back. "Before you say anything, just know I thought it through and I am totally..."

"Yes." Eric replied quickly, nodding his head with vigor.

"You didn't even let me finish..."

"Yes yes yes. My answer is yes a million times over. The explanation as to why is just wasted words." Eric cut me off again, waving off my statement with his hands. His excitement was as evident in his voice as it was in his movements. "Let's get married tomorrow night. But only if you really want that."

"Trust me..." I began slowly, drawing myself closer to him. "There's nothing I want more then that."

A/N: HURRAY ! they are getting married and its about damn time, wouldn't you guys say? please review and i will get to work on that next chapter