Disclaimer: See prologue
"Last time on the Ridonculous Race, the teams paid a visit to Count Dracula's creepy crib, and it terrified everyone, almost. Yes, the Goths cracked their first smiles, but other teams cracked under the pressure. The Ice Dancers grabbed first place, and I think Emma unknowingly caught Noah's heart. Tom and Jen had some creative differences, but managed to iron them out just in time to beat the Daters, whose trouble in paradise left them unbalanced and eliminated. Who will break hearts this week? It's time for… the Ridonculous Race!" Don smiled, causing a gleam and a cue for the intro.
Don walked over to the Chill Zone, which now had a Don Box set up next to it. "We're back in Transylvania, where our first place team is about to get the first travel tip."
The Ice Dancers approached the Don Box, and Josee pressed the button on top, receiving the tip that came out the slot. She held it up so Jacques could read as well, and read it out loud, "Take a donkey cart to Bucharest, and fly to… Hawaii!" The two ice dancers got starry-eyed as Josee announced their next destination.
A slideshow of pics of Hawaii appeared onscreen, and Don appeared in the top photo. "Hawaii, home of beautiful sunshine, ukuleles, and shirts that should only be worn ironically." In a cut, he was next seen at an airport. "When the teams land, they'll have to locate this Don Box to receive their next tip." He glanced down at said Don Box, and scowled when he saw it wearing an orange Hawaiian shirt. Holding his finger up to his earpiece, he said in a deadpan, "Haha, was that you, wardrobe?" Some laughing could be heard over the earpiece.
Soon enough, the teams were on their way. Teams had to take donkey carts in sets of three, so the Ice Dancers were forced to share their ride with the Reality TV Pros and the Sisters. In the back of the cart, Kitty held up her hands in a game of charades while Owen tried to guess what she was imitating.
"Ooh ooh, I'm good at this game! Um, uh… goal posts! No, rectangle face! Hmm, oh, a box of candy!" Owen guessed. The third guess caused Kitty to facepalm and Emma to roll her eyes. Up front, Jacques and Josee shared annoyed glances.
(Confessional- Is it a phone?)
"Playing games is for children," Josee said as she sat beside Jacques, "We stay focused on our goals at all times."
"I'm so focused, I haven't washed my boxers since the race started." Jacques added, pointing to the lower part of his costume.
Josee visibly flinched, and covered her nose. "That's not focused, that's gross."
Jacques glared at her. "Well, maybe some people think your lucky rabbit's foot is gross. Eh?"
Josee turned away from her partner, and pulled out a tiny rabbit foot on a chain. "Don't listen to him, Bun Bun." She gave it an affectionate kiss.
(End confessional)
"Cheesecake?" Owen guessed as they continued the game.
Deciding to give Owen a hint, Kitty flexed a finger and said, "Click."
"Oh, exploding cheesecake!"
"Camera! It's camera!" Emma snapped at the human garbage disposal. "She said click! How did you not catch that?" During her rant, she did not notice Noah staring at her admiringly. "Ugh, how do you put up with this all day long?" She asked Noah, and realized he was out of focus. "What's his problem? Hello? Earth to weirdo. Hello." She waved her hand in front of him to get him to react. "Hello."
From Noah's point of view, she was happily waving in his direction.
"Ugh." Emma scoffed, and gave up.
Owen leaned over to check on his partner. "You okay, buddy?"
"My stomach feels funny…" Noah responded, still watching Emma.
"Do you have to make boom-boom?" Owen asked, and then the cart shook, eliciting a yelp.
The cart ran over some small rocks, shaking the entire transport.
Unknowingly to Josee, her lucky rabbit's foot was being jostled out of her pocket, and it fell to the ground. The cart continued onward with the passengers none the wiser.
Not too far behind the first three teams, Father & Son were on their way, towing along Mom & Daughter and the Stepbrothers. Chet was plugging his nose while Kelly and Taylor were applying make-up.
"This donkey reeks!" He commented.
Lorenzo smirked. "He said the same thing about you." He remarked.
Unplugging his nose, Chet glared at his stepbrother. "A talking donkey? Yeah, that's possible." He retorted sarcastically.
"It must be possible," Lorenzo continued to smirk, "because you're talking right now!" Chet's eyes widened, and Lorenzo pumped his fist. "Booyah! Call me when you got a comeback." He sat back and made a call-me sign.
"Lorenzo's a poo-head!" Chet exclaimed, starting up the usual banter.
"Oh yeah, well Chet's a tool stool!" Lorenzo shot back as the camera cut to Father & Son up in front of the cart with Dwayne holding the reigns.
Junior looked back at the Stepbrothers questionably, and turned to his father, pointing back at the arguing teens with his thumb. "How old are those two?"
Dwayne chuckled, "Never mind them, some people just don't appreciate family quality time." He slung his arm around his son for a side hug. "Right, sporto?"
Junior cringed at his father's touch. "Yeah, sure Dad."
Taylor rolled her eyes. "You're so lucky that you got to bring your dad."
"Oh, I'm the lucky one." Dwayne answered her, and glanced back. "I bet doing this with your mom is pretty awesome too, right?"
Kelly shrugged helplessly. "Taylor's more of a Daddy's girl."
"Daddy and I have loads in common, like we both love being successful, and we both hate avocado." Taylor explained.
Down the path with the next cart, the donkey let out a fart, and MacArthur, the Surfers, and the Rockers all laughed. Sanders, however, cringed at the smell.
"Oh," Brody said after having his laugh, "From Transylvania to Hawaii, man, this race is epic!"
MacArthur finished laughing, and stood up. "Donkey, right back at'cha!" Turning around so her rear was facing the donkey's own behind, she let one rip.
(Location confessional- In front of the airport)
"I can't back down from a good fartdown. Personal pride." MacArthur said, and then some gurgling could be heard. "Oh, hold on, we've got some gale force winds moving into the area." She leaned over slightly.
"And I'm out." Sanders hurried away.
"Where are you going?! You're going to miss… miss the show!" A sound ripped out, but it didn't exactly sound like a fart. MacArthur went wide-eyed, and quickly put her hands behind her. "Oh… uh… I've got a code six. Officer needs t.p." She ran off, still with her hands behind her.
(End confessional)
The Goths, Crimson and Ennui, drove the next cart while the Best Friends and the Adversity Twins sat in the back. Sitting back-to-back, Carrie smiled as Devin snored away.
Crimson and Ennui sighed.
(Confessional- They sound so sad)
"Leaving Romania is tough, but leaving Romania to go to a tropical paradise full of sunshine and happiness…" Ennui moaned.
He and Crimson sighed.
(End confessional)
Tom and Jen, who were driving another donkey cart, were by themselves. Tom's eye had recovered, and the scratches on his face were no longer visible.
"Ew… why did we have to get our own cart? Why couldn't we have just rode with the other teams? At least then we wouldn't have to be so up close to something that smells so awful." Jen cringed while Tom drove.
Tom let go of the reigns with one hand to hold up his index finger. "Let's look at it this way, since we're alone we can re-evaluate our strategy in private." Putting his hand back on the reigns, he glanced at Jen with concern. "Now, what are we going to do? We nearly came in last during that last leg because we let something so silly as an argument about who started the blog get between us."
Jen frowned. "It really was silly of us to fight about it. The blog was totally a team effort, and we shouldn't have let our personal pride of it get between us."
"Agreed," Tom nodded, "so, what do we do now?"
Jen put a thoughtful finger to her lips. "It looked like some teams were working together last challenge, so maybe that's what we should do too."
"You mean, like form an alliance?"
"Not form an alliance," Jen shook her head, "just work together. We help them, they help us. A partnership isn't set in stone, and either team is free to go on ahead without the other if they need to." She shrugged helplessly. "But who do we team up with? The Goths?"
"Nah, too creepy."
"The Cadets?"
"Too loud."
"The Ice Dancers?"
"Their outfits are too tacky. Have you seen their skating outfits?"
"Good point, what was I even thinking there?"
Tom thought for a moment. "How about Carrie and her partner? They seem nice enough."
"And they have totes adorbs clothes." Jen added. "Perfect, we'll team up with the Best Friends. We still have to give Carrie an answer about who started the blog anyway."
(Location confessional- outside the airport)
Tom and Jen happily stood in front of their destination.
"We decided that we need to do better after we almost lost in Romania. It was so scary almost losing to the Daters." Jen told the camera.
"Truth. We're going to do much better in Hawaii, just watch." Tom agreed, and then frowned at Jen. "I really hope we don't have to wear those Hawaiian shirts."
"Ugh, don't even get me started on those shirts." Jen held up her hand.
(End confessional)
The flight landed in Hawaii, and as the teams left the plane, they approached a Hawaiian local.
"As is the custom, the teams are greeted with a lovely necklace of local flowers." Don narrated as Jay and Mickey were approached by a local with a lei.
"Um, those aren't… orchids?!" Jay panicked upon recognizing the flowers. He ran away, but the local, determined to greet him traditionally, threw the lei at the retreating twin.
"Nooooo!" Mickey dove for the lei, but barely missed as it landed on Jay's head.
"Ah-ah-achoo!" Jay sneezed upon the flowers' contact.
(Location confessional- outside the Hawaiian airport)
"Oh boy, oh boy, they really like their traditions around here." Mickey awkwardly chuckled.
"I'm severely allergic to orchids." Jay declared, and a sneeze right after confirmed his statement.
(End confessional)
Noah and Owen exited the airport, and were the first team to reach the Don Box. They were about to press it to retrieve their tip, but were pushed aside by Emma.
"This one's ours. You might as well give up now." Emma told them.
"Uh oh, prepared to get Noah'd." Owen sat up, rubbing his head, and looked to his partner as a cue. To his surprise, Noah was gazing at Emma again. "Um, any second now, he's just thinking and… Noah?"
Once again, Emma happily waved to Noah in his love-struck gaze.
Kitty went ahead, and grabbed the tip from the Don Box. "It's a Botch or Watch. Whoever didn't do gymnastics in Romania has to dive for wedding rings?"
"In this challenge, teams must dive in Hawaii's most popular wedding bay, and retrieve one of the rings at the bottom." Don explained at the bay's dock, and footage showed multiple rings sitting on the bay floor.
"Then must swim to the beach at the tip of the bay, and meet your partner." Owen read the tip, and started to run after the Sisters. "Noah, let's go!" He doubled back when Noah wasn't moving, and picked him up. "Maybe it's rabies…" He wondered as he carried Noah off.
Jacques and Josee ran out of the airport when Josee slowed to a halt.
"Something doesn't feel right." She murmured to herself. She gasped and felt her person. "Oh no! Bun Bun? Where is my Bun Bun?!"
Jacques held up his hands reassuringly to calm her down. "It's okay. We don't need a rabbit's foot. It's like you said about my underpants. It's just a silly superstition."
Josee glared at Jacques. "Okay, then take off your lucky gitch then." She pointed to the lower part of his outfit.
Jacques glanced down at his nether regions, and glanced back up at the camera before running off.
"That's what I thought!" Josee shouted after him.
At the bay, Spud plugged his nose and jumped in the water. Jacques arrived soon after him, and dived in with a spin mid-air.
"You can do it, Kit." Emma encouraged her sister.
Kitty winced. "It looks pretty deep."
"Just pretend it's the pool at Nana's condo, but with less old people. Go!" Without warning, Emma pushed her sister in.
Kitty resurfaced moments later, and pointed an accusatory finger at Emma. "You just shoved me!"
"It was a push of encouragement, and you're fine. Now go get a ring!"
Beside Emma stood Carrie and Devin. Carrie gave Devin a quick hug.
"For luck." Carrie reasoned, blushing as she hugged her best friend/crush. Taking a running start, she jumped.
"You're going to rock this!" Devin called afterward.
Carrie started to swoon as she dove towards the water, but was unexpectedly met by a rock protruding out of the bay. Many of the competitors cringed at the dive failure.
Recovering from their cringe soon afterward, MacArthur looked at Geoff with a smile. "Cannonball?"
With a shout of 'Yes!', Geoff joined the Police Cadet in cannonballing into the bay.
"Woo! MacArthur, you kick so much butt!" Brody cheered MacArthur on.
Sanders felt the need to point out, "You know she's my partner, right?"
Brody coughed, and cheered on Geoff. "You're doing good too, bro!"
Down below, the Botchers swam around looking for rings. Jacques found a mini-squid, and it squirted a surprising amount of ink at him.
The teams anticipated who would be the first to emerge from the depths with a ring, and they soon got their answer when Jacques surfaced with a ring in hand.
"Yes! See you on the beach!" Josee shouted to her partner, and ran past Kelly and Taylor to get to the beach.
Taylor did some arm stretches, and Kelly watched as Josee left. "Um, maybe this is where you should be in the water already, sweetie."
Done stretching, Taylor gave her mother a smirk. "Chill, Mom, how many swimming medals do I have on my wall? Like a billion."
(Confessional- Why don't I believe that?)
Proudly, Taylor sat beside a rather concerned Kelly. "Daddy had to reinforce the walls to hold them all up, and my swim coach told Mom I'm the best student he has ever seen."
"Well, actually, sweetie-" Kelly tried to say.
"Ever!" Taylor interrupted her with a wave of her hand.
(End confessional)
Taylor dove into the water, but ended up doing a belly flop.
Kelly winced, and gave an awkward smile. "I might've exaggerated what her swim coach said just a little…"
Tom and Jen arrived at the bay, and Jen stared at the bay with wide eyes. "I have to get my hair wet? Again?!"
Tom saw how distressed his partner was getting, and quickly tried to calm her down. "Easy, Jen. Remember, we nearly lost last round, and we need to do better. For the blog."
Jen took a deep breath, and regained her composure. "For the blog." Running forward, she jumped in.
"You can do this!" Tom called after her. He folded his arms, and began to wait for his partner when he heard a sneeze off to his side. Jay and Mickey had arrived.
"You know, I always suspected my orchid allergy was fairly acute." Jay said to his brother.
"You think there are any jellyfish?" Mickey asked, indicating the bay.
"If there are," Jay rubbed his nose, "you know you're immune."
Tom went up to the twins. "I'm sorry, but I can't let this go on any further. Your headwear is simply atrocious." He said to them.
"You mean my helmet?" Mickey glanced up at his protective headgear.
"Yes, that." Tom confirmed. "Headwear such as that is a major fashion faux pas."
"But I like my helmet."
"That may be so, but honestly, you're better off getting rid of it." Tom removed Mickey's helmet from the twin's head, and tossed it into the bay. "It's not doing you any favors."
Mickey's eyes widened. "My helmet!" With speed that surprised both Jay and Tom, he dove after it.
Josee ran across the beach to her and Jacques' designated meeting point. "First place? Even without Bun Bun? Maybe Jacques is right, I don't need a good luck charm anymore." As she ran across the beach, something poked out of the sand like a sore thumb, prompting her to stop and investigate. Sitting in the sand was a black rock oddly shaped like a trophy. Josee picked it up to observe. "It's so light, and warm. The energy, it's beautiful! Come on, Roc Roc, we have a race to win!" She began to run again, but was yanked back by a fishing line hooked on her jacket.
"Wait! You can't take a lava rock as a souvenir." The fishing line's owner, an elderly local man, told her.
Swatting the line away from her jacket, Josee glared at the man. "You have a whole volcano full of them! Lay off, grandpa!" Without another word on the subject, she ran off.
"While the Ice Dancers extend their first place lead, the other teams are still searching for rings and coming up short." Don narrated. Kitty and Jen spotted the same ring, and reached for it at the same time, causing them to struggle for it. "Some may even come up dead." As Kitty and Jen struggled, they noticed they were being circled around by a shark, a shark that was wearing a helmet that looked eerily liked Mickey's. They held onto each other in panic. "Find out when we return on the Ridonculous Race." The show cut to break.
When the show faded back in, Jen and Kitty were still holding onto each other fearfully. Just as it seemed the shark was going to attack them, luck intervened.
Mickey, still after his helmet, grabbed onto his helmet which was stuck on the shark's dorsal fin. The shark was alerted to its attacker, and started swimming around frantically to try and shake him. Mickey held on tight as the shark tugged him around like a flag whipping through the wind.
Out of immediate danger, the girls released each other in relief. It was only after they released that Jen remembered why she was fighting with Kitty in the first place, and whirled her head to look at the Sister.
Kitty waved the ring for her to see, and swam up, leaving Jen to snap her fingers before something off-screen attracted her attention. Quickly going from frowning to smiling, she swam away.
"Ka-bling!" Kitty announced as she surfaced, holding up the ring for Emma to see.
"Got one!" Carrie soon joined her, and showed her ring to Devin.
Emma pumped her fists. "Yes!"
"Carrie, you're amazing!" Devin praised Carrie.
Down in the bay, Carrie blushed and let out a squeal. Unfortunately for her, it wasn't as to herself as she thought since Kitty smiled at her.
"Did you just squeal?" Kitty asked knowingly.
"N-n-no, I think it was a dolphin." Carrie denied vehemently, swimming away from Kitty.
The younger sister gasped, and watched Carrie in awe. "You're in love with him!" Wanting more details, she swam after the Best Friend.
Jen surfaced moments later. "Found one! What did I miss?" She glanced around, briefly believing she heard Kitty say something.
(Confessional- And Kitty's the first one to find out about Carrie's crush)
Kitty seemed pretty enthusiastic while Emma couldn't have cared less.
"When love is in the air, I know it. I have a super sensitive love detector, and it's been going off a lot lately." Kitty boasted.
"What are you talking about?" Emma asked skeptically.
"Nothing," Kitty answered with a wave of her hand, "so, notice any guys on some other teams lately?"
"No." Emma answered flatly.
Then Kitty started making a bunch of alarm noises. They got to be so obnoxious that Emma got up and left the confessional while her sister kept on going.
(End confessional)
"It's just," Carrie explained to Kitty, "we've been friends for so long, and anyway, he has a girlfriend. So please don't say anything."
"I won't," Kitty promised, "but maybe someone should." She added, swimming ahead of Carrie, making the Best Friend take her words into consideration.
Jen soon swam up to Carrie. "Hey."
Carrie smiled upon seeing the Fashion Blogger. "Hey!"
"Mind if I swim along with you?"
"Sure, no problem."
"As more teams continue to find rings, the Ice Dancers say aloha to challenge number one and aloha to challenge number two." Don stated as Jacques emerged from the bay to meet up with Josee at the next Don Box.
"We're still in first place, and check it out," Josee held up the lava rock she found to Jacques, "new good luck charm! It's a lava rock!"
"Nothing can stop us now!" Jacques cheered.
Taking their next tip, Josee read, "It's an All-In. In this Hawaiian wedding ritual, teams must walk on-"
"Fire!" Don interrupted them, walking across a path of hot coals, holding a lei of maile leaves and a grass skirt. "Technically coals. In this challenge, brides wear grass skirts and grooms wear leis of maile as they carry their brides across the coals. It's a test of strength, and honor, and if any part of them catch on fire, it's back to the starting line!" Don winced, and ran across the coals, coming to a stop in front of the Ice Dancers. "Once teams get across untoasted, it's a race to the Chill Zone." Glancing down at his burnt feet, Don held one in his hands and scowled. "Great, now I have to take foot modeling off my resume."
Noah found two rings, and scooped them up, heading up to the surface.
"I can't find any, Mom!" Taylor shouted up to her mother standing on the dock.
"Keep trying, sweetie! There have to be some still down there. Some of the other teams are still here." Kelly reasoned.
Noah surfaced, and held up two of his fingers. "I've got two!"
"Yes!" Owen cheered as Noah began to swim to their meeting spot, and ran to join him.
"Hey!" Taylor called after Noah. "Give me one of those! You only need one!"
"Nope!" Noah called back, causing Taylor to growl and dive back under.
(Confessional- Bonus ring!)
Owen glanced at Noah, who was smirking. "She was right. You only needed one ring, not that I'm happy you got an extra or anything."
Noah shrugged. "Whatever," he held up the two rings, "I plan on selling this extra one for cash."
(End confessional)
Jacques and Josee were the first to start the second challenge. Jacques was walking across the coals while he held Josee above him. This way, she would be clear of the coals and have less chances of her grass skirt catching fire.
"That's it, Jacques. Like the Olympics, it's all just one big mind game." Josee encouraged Jacques, who was keeping himself peaceful and ignoring the coals.
"This challenge is pretty easy." Jacques said with a wide smile, his eyes closed confidently.
"That's right, you're just walking, and there are no coals."
Those were the wrong words to say to Jacques for he stopped immediately, his eyes snapping open. Because he had stopped, his grass skirt, which he was wearing for whatever reason, caught fire.
"I forgot about the coals!" Jacques screamed, dropping Josee off to the side of the coal walk, and running for the water. On his way to the bay, he passed by Geoff and Brody, who were putting on a skirt and lei respectively. The moment he hit the water, he sighed in relief.
Brody and Geoff took their turn on the coal walk, and Brody carried Geoff like a bride.
"Remember that time we were paddle-boarding out, and we forgot our wetsuits? So cold, dude!" Geoff mentioned to Brody.
"Yeah, keep it coming." Brody responded uncertainly, glancing momentarily down to his feet.
"That day you got your tongue stuck to the flag pole? Or that time I poured cherry slush down your shorts. That was gnar-gnar, dude!" Geoff guffawed at the memories.
By that time, they had reached the end of the coals safely.
"We did it!" Brody cheered.
"First place, bro! Let's motor to the Chill Zone!" Geoff turned, and ran for the Carpet of Completion.
Brody followed him at a slower pace, tenderly putting one foot in front of the other. "Oh man, I'd love to put my feet in a tub of cherry slush right now…"
More and more teams reached the second challenge, and were either putting on leis or grass skirts.
Carrie walked over to Kitty. "Kitty, you think you could tie this?" She turned around so Kitty could tie up her skirt. As Kitty did her work, Carrie leaned in to whisper. "You think I should say something to Devin?" They both peeked over to see Devin adjusting his maile lei.
"Life is short, and who knows? He might feel the same way." Kitty advised her, walking off to talk to Owen, leaving Carrie to contemplate. "Hey, we're both grooms! Cool!" Kitty said to Owen.
"I don't think it's all that cool; Noah's acting weird." Owen told her.
"What?"
Staring at his partner who was staring at Emma, Owen continued to say, "He's drooling, smiling, and staring. It's really weird."
Kitty giggled. "He just likes my sister."
"What, but he's being all weird and goofy and… oooh." Owen caught onto what she was suggesting, and chuckled at Noah continuing to stare.
Taylor surfaced again back at the bay, and glared at her mother, who was still on the dock next to Jay. "Mom, I'm telling you, there are no more rings!"
"Maybe you're just not looking hard enough, sweetie!" Kelly replied, trying to keep her daughter calm.
"I keep telling you, there aren't any more!" Taylor exclaimed.
Next to her, a helmet-less Mickey surfaced. "I found one, Jay!"
"Nice job, Mickey! Hurry!" Jay told his brother before leaving Mom & Daughter at the bay.
"Taylor, you have to hurry!" Kelly turned back to her daughter.
"No more rings, Mom!" Taylor shouted back.
"Just try, please!" Kelly pleaded.
"Fine!" Taylor dove back under.
"As the Adversity Twins join the rest of the teams in the second challenge, Mom & Daughter rush to finish the first." Don said in a voice-over.
"Oh no, I don't do skirts." MacArthur shoved a skirt into Sanders' hands.
"I had a feeling you'd say that." Sanders deadpanned.
"I can't wear the skirt! Everyone at school is going to see this!" Junior tried to reason with his father.
"But if I wear the skirt, you'll have to carry me over hot coals." Dwayne responded, holding out the skirt for Junior.
"My classmate, Larry Finkle, got shoved into the girls' locker room all last year because his name rhymes with tinkle!"
Dwayne chuckled at the thought. "Hehehe, tinkle."
Junior frowned at his father. "Dad, take this seriously."
"I am, son, I am." Dwayne assured him. "I just think we'll have an easier time doing this if I carry you."
"Hey, Spud, how does this look?" Father & Son looked in the direction of the voice.
Rock stood with a grass skirt on top his head like a metal-head wig. Spud, who was wearing a lei, gave him a thumbs-up. "You're rocking it, Rock!" Spud complimented him.
"Alright! Let's rock and roll!" Rock cheered, hopping up on Spud's shoulders. Spud grinned and headed towards the coal walk.
Dwayne and Junior both blinked at the sight of the Rockers, and Junior soon smiled brightly. Looking to Dwayne, Junior eagerly said, "I think I've got an idea."
"I'm not wearing the skirt." Chet told Lorenzo point blank.
"I'm not the girl." Lorenzo shot back.
"And I am?" Chet asked threateningly.
Lorenzo held up his fist. "You said it, not me, snot-face."
Devin and Carrie were at the beginning of the coal walk, both fully in costume.
"We're so going to win this- whoa!" Carrie yelped as Devin lifted her into his arms. Realizing just the position they were in, Carrie couldn't help blushing. "Wow… uh, yep! So winning…" She rested her hand on Devin's chest as she started to lean into the curl of his neck.
"Time to walk the walk!" Devin interrupted her moment, and caused her to sit straight up again. Taking a step forward, he began to cross the coals. He was slightly distracted by the burning coals, and this allowed Carrie to curl up against his neck again, and she silently swooned without him noticing.
At the Chill Zone, Don sipped a drink from a coconut cup, and was alerted to a team's presence by their shouting.
Geoff and Brody ran onto the Carpet of Completion.
"Geoff, Brody, congratulations, you're today's winners!" Don declared.
"Awesome!" "Yes!" "I love you, man!" "I'd marry you all over again!"
"I love weddings." Don said as the Surfers hugged.
Jacques and Josee finally returned to the coals just as Tom and Jen were going to begin. This time, Josee was the one carrying Jacques. Jacques, being the bigger partner, wasn't exactly sure how he felt about Josee carrying him. Josee rushed forward, practically gliding over the coals, passing Carrie and Devin easily.
Moments later, they were rushing back towards the start, with Jacques' skirt once again on fire. Josee carried Jacques over to the beach, and threw her partner in the bay. Jacques sighed in relief.
"Okay, we can do this," Jen told Tom as he picked her up and held her in his arms, "It's just a short walk over some hot rocks. No big deal."
"You know, the saddest part about this is these leaves do not go with my shirt." Tom commented as he stepped onto the coals.
Mickey washed up on the shore in front of the Don Box, where Jay was waiting for him.
"You did it, Mickey! You swam great!" Jay complimented his brother as he got up. "Where's your helmet?"
"I tried to get it from a shark, and lost the shark. It's gone." Mickey lowered his head sadly.
Jay patted his brother on the shoulder. "Hey, when we're done with this race, we'll get you a new helmet. Okay?"
"I guess." Mickey sighed, and Jay turned to press the Don Box's button.
"Looks like we have to walk on hot coals." Jay read the tip.
(Confessional- Mickey honestly looks better without the helmet)
Jay and Mickey frowned in the confessional.
"We suffer from a rare condition called Temperature Dyslexia." Jay admitted to the camera.
"We can't feel hot or cold; we get burns and frostbite a lot," Mickey added. "but we're going to own this challenge!" They attempt to high-five, but miss.
"We're still not used to giving high-fives."
(End confessional)
Devin and Carrie cheered as they got off the coals, and Devin put Carrie back on her feet.
"Hey Best Friends," Josee called from behind them, revealing Jacques once more carrying Josee and at a very quick pace, overtaking Tom and Jen's walking pace, "move it or lose it!"
"Run!" Carrie exclaimed to Devin, and they turned to run towards the Chill Zone.
Jacques and Josee quickly finished the coal walk unscathed, and continued after the Best Friends. Josee clutched her new good luck charm as they attempted to catch up to them.
"Believe in the lava rock, and we'll own the podium!" Josee told Jacques.
The Ice Dancers overtook Carrie and Devin, and seemed like they were going to beat them to the Carpet of Completion.
It was all for naught when Jacques tripped on a small rock, sending the ice dancing duo to the ground just feet from the Chill Zone. Carrie and Devin quickly took advantage of this, and ran past them.
"Carrie, Devin, congrats! You're in second place!" Don told the Best Friends.
As Jacques and Josee recovered, Tom and Jen hurried past them.
"Fashion Bloggers, third place!" Don declared.
"Yes!" Tom and Jen squealed, and hugged happily.
A very upset Jacques and Josee showed up on the Carpet of Completion seconds afterward.
"Ice Dancers, fourth place!"
(Confessional- Fourth does not roll with those two)
Both of the Ice Dancers looked close to shedding tears.
"No! Fourth! We didn't even make the podium at all?!" Josee cried out as Jacques sobbed into his hands. Her right eye twitching and her hands repeatedly clenching, she got up from her seat. Hearing her move, Jacques looked up.
"Josee? What are you- oh no!" Jacques bent over, covered his head as random objects off-screen were tossed across the confessional space and Josee could be heard screaming in outrage.
(End confessional)
Crimson scribbled quickly on a grass skirt with a black magic marker.
Ennui stood next to her, telling the camera, "She only wears black. Even if it's grass, it must be black grass."
MacArthur carried an uncomfortable Sanders over her shoulder like she didn't care, and Sanders watched the team behind them awkwardly.
"Get your pits out of my face!" Lorenzo snapped at Chet, who was wearing a coconut bra and Lorenzo was carrying.
Chet smirked and remarked, "Get your face out of my pits!"
Spud happily walked across the coals with an equally happy Rock on his shoulders.
"You got this, Spud! Almost there!" Rock encouraged his partner, and then glanced behind them, causing the camera to follow his gaze as well.
Dwayne whimpered as he walked across the coals, Junior on his shoulders. Copying Rock's tactic, Junior wore the skirt as a wig. Nobody at school could laugh at him if he was wearing the skirt like that.
"You can do this. Don't back out now, or we'll have to do this all over." Junior whispered to his father gently.
Owen ran towards the Chill Zone, carrying Noah over his shoulder just like MacArthur did with Sanders. Noah stared his love-struck gaze at the Sisters running behind him and Owen, Kitty carrying Emma.
"Fifth and sixth place!" Don addressed the Reality TV Pros and Sisters respectively. Owen, Kitty, and Emma all cheered.
A few minutes later, Don was sitting in his lounge chair before the Chill Zone, and addressed the next teams.
"Seventh!" The Police Cadets.
"Eighth!" The Stepbrothers.
"Ninth!" The Rockers.
"Tenth!" Father & Son.
The Goths eventually showed up, their leis and skirts black, along with marker scribbles drawn on their faces. "Eleventh!" Don pointed to them.
Jay and Mickey finished preparing for the second challenge, and Jay sneezed as he and Mickey approached the coals. Jay was riding on Mickey's back, his arms locked around his brother's neck.
(Confessional- Sneeze you!)
"We never heard of maile leaves before." Mickey said.
"Guess it's time to order another medical alert bracelet." Jay said, Mickey nodding along with his words.
(End confessional)
Jay and Mickey arrived at the Chill Zone.
"Adversity Twins, twelfth place! What happened to your helmet?" Don greeted them, quickly noticing the difference.
"Lost it in the bay." Mickey answered.
Don shrugged and walked back to his chair. "Eh, you look better without it."
The sun was setting, and Mom & Daughter were finally at the second challenge. Kelly was carrying Taylor across the coals, and as they reached the walk's halfway point, Taylor's skirt caught fire.
"Fire!" Taylor screamed, and Kelly immediately ran for the bay. Kelly threw Taylor onto the beach, and rapidly shoveled sand onto the flame, getting some sand in Taylor's hair in the process. "Mom, my extensions!"
Further down the beach from where Kelly and Taylor were trying to put out their small flame, Carrie and Devin sat on a large boulder, watching the show.
"Wow, those two are some team." Devin noted with a hint of sarcasm.
"Yeah," Carrie agreed uncertainly, "um, Devin? I'm so glad we're here together, and-"
"There you two are." Devin and Carrie looked up to see that the Fashion Bloggers were walking towards them. "We were looking for you." Jen said.
"Oh, hey, Jen. Hey, Tom. What's up?" Carrie greeted them.
Tom started them off, "Okay, so, we noticed last challenge that other teams were working together, and we thought that you might want to do the same with us."
"You mean, like an alliance?" Carrie asked as she and Devin shared a glance.
"No no, not an alliance," Jen corrected, "just working together. You know, we help you, you help us, and either team is able to leave the other behind if need be." Devin and Carrie glanced at each other uncertainly.
"I don't know…" Carrie held her hand up to her chin in thought.
Tom held up a reassuring hand. "It's okay. You can have some time to think about it if you'd like."
"Oh, that would be nice. Thanks, I'll definitely get back to you on that." Carrie smiled thankfully.
"Speaking of getting back to you on things, we finally have an answer for you, Carrie. We both started the blog." Jen said, looking at her partner with a smile, and he smiled back.
Carrie continued to smile. "Cool. So, see you tomorrow?"
"Definitely. Night." Jen bid the Best Friends good night as she and Tom went to go turn in for the night.
Devin stood up and gave Carrie's head an affectionate rub. "I'm going to crash too. Night, homie." Whistling as he walked off, Devin followed the Bloggers' direction. Carrie slouched, and sighed over the fact that another love confession had been interrupted.
Mom & Daughter arrived at the Chill Zone.
"Kelly, Taylor, I'm sorry. You're the last team to arrive." Don informed them.
"Oh…" Kelly sighed as she put Taylor on her feet. "I'm sorry, Taylor, but it looks like we're eliminated."
Taylor scowled at her mother. "Great, just great. Thanks a lot, Mom. The one thing I lost, I had to lose because of you!"
Something inside Kelly flared up as Taylor ranted at her, and she glared at her daughter fiercely. "You've never won anything in your life, Taylor! Not one race, not one medal, nothing!"
Taylor blinked in confusion. "Wait, what? My room is full of trophies and medals!"
"Because your dad bought a trophy store!" Kelly shot back. "What kind of trophies come in the mail?"
"Um, could I just say something here?" Don inquired from off to the side of the argument.
"And guess who paid your coaches to lie? That's right. Daddy." Kelly continued.
"Beauty pageants! I've won beauty pageants! You can't fake those!" Taylor countered desperately as she became more horrified by the implications of her mother's words.
"Hey, host trying to talk here. I have something I still need to say." Don tried to interject again.
Kelly chuckled smugly. "Oh honey, when you have enough money, you can fake anything." Taylor gasped.
"The coals were hot, but that was cold." Don commented, finally getting a word in seeing as Taylor couldn't come up with anything to say. "I just wanted to inform you both that it's a non-elimination round. Congratulations, you're still in the race." Kelly and Taylor both stared at the host in shock, and their eyes followed as he walked away from them.
Taylor glanced up at her mother, and Kelly, who was livid moments ago, frowned in concern when she saw that Taylor appeared to be hurt. "Taylor, about what I said…"
The moment Kelly opened her mouth, Taylor gave her a death glare, crossed her arms, and walked away. "Don't talk to me."
With Kelly standing alone in the background as Taylor walked off-screen, Don addressed the camera. "Come back next time to see more shocking truths be revealed on the Ridonculous Race!" His smile caused a gleam on the camera, and the show went to the credits.
Current Team Rankings:
1st: Geoff and Brody- Surfers
2nd: Carrie and Devin- Best Friends
3rd: Tom and Jen- Fashion Bloggers
4th: Josee and Jacques- Ice Dancers
5th: Owen and Noah- Reality TV Pros
6th: Emma and Kitty- Sisters
7th: Sanders and MacArthur- Police Cadets
8th: Chet and Lorenzo- Stepbrothers
9th: Rock and Spud- Rockers
10th: Dwayne and Junior- Father & Son
11th: Crimson and Ennui- Goths
12th: Mickey and Jay- Adversity Twins
13th: Kelly and Taylor- Mother & Daughter
Eliminated:
14th: Stephanie and Ryan- Daters
15th: Laurie and Miles- Vegans
16th: Ellody and Mary- Geniuses
17th: Gerry and Pete- Tennis Rivals
18th: Leonard and Tammy- LARPers
Author's Note:
Okay, so this episode heavily reflected canon, and that's because some plots were already in play when this episode came around, and it helps emphasize how little by little the Fashion Bloggers' presence affects the race, and soon enough, everything will be changed up. As per the AU, I added my own twists and rectified bits here and there that went overlooked in canon.
One thing that changed was Dwayne and Junior's roles in the All-In. While it was funny to see Junior carry his father over the coals, with his muscles, it should've been physically impossible so I rectified that. The change also allowed for Rock and Spud, who were ready before them to jump up a bit.
With Tom and Jen still in play, and their plot, I decided to keep them close to the Best Friends so they could have time to chat, and in turn, cause the Ice Dancers' fourth place gag to start an episode early.
Also, a shout-out to my good friend, StayOuttaMyShed, for reading my original draft and giving input on the first episode. It was his help that allowed me to get Dwayne and Junior's new scene written correctly, get the Best Friends' reaction in-character, and he also proposed ideas that may or may not pop up in the future. If they do, I will be crediting him for those when they show.