She was floating. With nothing to support her she was floating through the air, air? No, it was more like water. Warm water that was surrounding her and hugging her body, yet she was not wet. It was a weird, but pleasant feeling. She just floated there she didn't know how long for, days? Weeks? It could have been decades for all she knew, but what she did know was that she was happy. And that's all that mattered.
Suddenly and without warning that feeling was gone, reality slammed back into her and she was ripped from the happiness that she knew. Her heart beating faster and her breathing becoming rapid as she came to consciousness, she felt a pressing weight on top of her crushing her and restricting her breath. She became very aware of the rest of her body realizing just now that she couldn't feel her legs, she was scared before, but just the thought of that terrified her. She started hyperventilating, she had no idea how she got there or even where she was. After a few minutes she made an effort to calm her breathing, the hyperventilating was making her vision even more spotty then it was before, if that was even possible.
She tried to move but cried out and almost started sobbing as she felt a stabbing pain in her lower abdomen. It was so intense that it was the only thing she could think about, it consumed her every thought. She didn't think as to how she got there or where she was, the single most important thing in her life right now was to escape that pain. How she hadn't felt it before, she didn't know, but right now the only thing she knew was pain. The more she thought about it the more blurry her vision became and suddenly she started thinking that maybe just maybe it would be better if she just succumbed to the darkness, everything would be better and the pain would all go away, yeah that seems like the right idea, no more thinking about college or getting her life together, no more flakey friends or just sitting in the darkness at night just willing her family to love her for who she is. Just, peace.
So as she laid there waiting for death. Her final thought went to her parents, and how disappointed they would have been to see her, giving up so easily, but she didn't care, they never understood her. She could handle their disappointment, as long as it would make the pain go away. Sure she was a coward and sure she was selfish but that didn't matter anymore, nothing would matter anymore. She wasn't a suicidal person, and was sure that no matter how much worse things could have gotten she never would have killed herself, but while she lay dying, she wasn't ashamed to say, that she finally felt freer than she had ever felt in her entire life, as her vision turned black and her last breath left her