I have no idea where this came from xDD But given a certain mist Kunoichi's eventual means of income, and a certain other character's job, this was inevitable xDD There can only be so many people gathering information on the Akatsuki...
Ok xDD about the terms used. It's always bothered me that everyone on Naruto, regardless of birthplace, and where they were raised, speaks the exact same language. I mean, for TV purposes, they have to, so everyone understands them, and because their voice depends entirely on the voice actor. But like, in an actual situation I think that at the very least, Mizu no kuni (since it's way away from everything elsexD) would probably have, at the very least, their own dialect. I'm SURE I'm misuising this, but I believe that to add jin to something would mean a person from there, right? Like, how Nihonjin means "a person from japan", "Tairiku jin" would, if I'm not entirely mistaken, mean "a person from the contintent" right? xD Like, referring to the landmass that makes up most of the naruto geogoraphy.would that be the right term? And "go" at the end, I've been told, means a language. Like nihongo meaning the japanese language, again, if I'm not totally off, "shimago" would mean the "island language" xDD I'm probably totally wrong, though.
And about the Samehada thing... I have a theory on Kisame that I'm sure will soon be disproven by the manga xD
And once again, my author's note is longer than the one shot xD
Disclaimer: Naruto Belongs to Kishimoto Masashi
Title: To drive a hard bargain
Genre: General
Warnings: Alcohol
Canon: Yes
Fic Spoilers: Yes
Setting:During the series, a while after the chunin exams.
Summary:Because to catch a criminal, sometimes another criminal'shelp was necessary...
"Sir, It's four AM. If you're waiting for someone..." The young waitress who approached him in the dark, secluded back room of the otherwise unoccupied establishment, yawned, fatigue apparent in every movement of her arms, and eyes. She stretched, and the older man feigned innocence as his eyes trailed down to the low cut neckline of her shirt. He smiled in spite of himself. Ah yes, the Uniforms had always been his favourite part of this place.
And he'd always been partial to blonds.
"I really don't think they're coming."
"What? Oh, right," He nodded, having completely forgotten what the young lady had been saying. "No, no. They'll definitely be here." His informant had never once shirked a meeting. More accurately, his informant had never turned down an opportunity to get paid. In that one regard, rogue ninja tended to be very dependable.
Desperation and reliability went hand and hand.
As if on cue, the bell by the door rang gently, as the creak of wood and squeaked hinges denoted a customer more blatantly. The disapproving huff, and sound of the stuck door being kicked back into place assured him of the stranger's identity. The lack of audible footsteps confirmed it.
Only mist ninja walked like that all the time.
"Oi." The voice- A woman's undoubtably- was coming from behind the booth at which he'd seated himself, and the waitress took an uneasy step back, and in a moment, he could see why. The newcomer was a full head taller than the blond, and the hand resting along the edge of the thick vinyl seats sported sharp, almost clawed nails. Most imposing, however, was the oversized saw attached by a strip of coth to her back, that she seemed mindful of while directing herself to the seat opposite his.
He nodded slowly at the weapon, and she returned it with the kind of bow her people favoured, before untying it, and laying it against the wall beside the table. It wasn't a hostility, but an identification. This proved beyond any shadow of a doubt she was who she claimed to be. Though her sharp facial structure, unusually pointed canine teeth, and thick eastern accent said nothing at all against her.
The waitress glanced from one, to the large sheet of metal, to the other, and scurried away. Apparently, she'd realised exactly what sort of meeting this was.
"Haven't kept you waiting, have I?" She wasted no time in seating herself, watching the waitress's distress and flight with a cruel sort of amusement he chose to ignore.
"I've waited longer for things this important." He grinned, taking hold of the small ceramic glass of sake set before himself that he'd been attending to before she had entered. He cocked a greying eyebrow, allowing himself a covert once over of the other's features. They'd arranged this meeting through a reliable third party that both trusted, and had never met face to face. He nodded approvingly as she took her seat, much to her confusion and suspicion.
Pretty little thing... Not bad.. She was lamentably lacking in the bust, for his tastes, but all in all, not bad. Especially considering the company she was rumoured to have kept.
"You have the information, I hope." The white haired man chuckled, when she did nothing but fold her arms, and eye him warily.
"Money first. Then you get your scroll."
The other frowned, taking a sip of his drink. "Are you always this neurotic?"
"Cautious." She hissed.
The note-quite-leaf nin shrugged, setting his glass back down, and folding his arms lazily behind his head. "The way I see it," He started with a cocky grin. "I'm the one calling the shots, here. I can fond information elsewhere, if you give me too much trouble."
"And the way I see it," She shot back, cold smile pulling at the corners of her lips. "If you aren't happy with my precautions, I can sell this information elsewhere. Or not at all. And I think you do want this," A haughty flick of her wrist pulled a maroon edged scroll from her sleeve. "After all... don't you want Kisame's info because he attacked you a while ago? To protect that little fox boy...? If something were to happen to him because you were misinformed, well... You can't hold me responsible." Her smile flickered wider, and he could only assume that she'd noticed his agitation. He hadn't really wanted that knowledge in hands like her own.
"You know about Naruto." He stated evenly, the shock sobering.
"It's hard not to. The boy announces his name whenever he fights anyone. You might want to train that out of him, if you plan on hiding for any considerable length of time. "
The blond was sleeping in one of the rooms upstairs, having worn himself out training, rasengan after rasengan draining his chakra. His surrogate sensei had made no mention of this meeting, and would really prefer if he didn't know what kind of people he was in the habit of doing business with.
"Please excuse my suspicion," She spoke more formally when she interrupted his thinking. "As a general rule, I don't trust anyone vile enough to do business with me." She sunk in her seat, hands tightening where they gripped her arms, as her voice dropped to a bitter little grumble. "I've seen what happens when you do."
"Ah," That made sense. The older man nodded knowingly, fixing her with a slightly more sympathetic gaze. "You're still in mourning, I'd imagine."
"My people don't grieve."
"Your people, or your ninja?"
Shw quirked a halfhearted little smile, still settled low against the back of her chair, in something akin to shame. "Our civilian's culture, and our ninja's are two different things entirely." The kunoichi remarked cooly, as she snapped the scroll open, examining it idly. To taunt himself, no less. "If you consider apathy and bloodshed culture, that is."
He let out a little grunt and a nod. "That would be what the 'bloody mist village' is best known for."
A wicked shadow passed over her smile, and she leaned forward elbows resting on the table. "You should hear our folksongs," She whispered in her native tongue. "They tend to make tairiku-jin cringe."
She was a great deal more at ease, slipping back into her own dialect, suddenly quite eloquent. Contrary to what one would expect, shimago was a fairly gentle, graceful take on the continental language, each syllable clicking neatly into it's place. It had an odd little rhythm, that wasn't at all unpleasant to listen to.
"So?" Her voice was rougher in his language. "Are you interested, or am I wasting my time?"
"Alright, alright," He conceded, reaching into his pocket, and fishing for something tucked safely away inside. "But you'll have to make do with this," He sent the round, green coin purse flying, and she caught it between two mesh covered hands. The ex-kiri nin turned it in her grasp, scrutinizing every stitch, and froggy detail, before prying open the metal clasps, and emptying Gama chan's contents onto the tabletop. She frowned at the flurry of small worthless coins that spilled across the polished wood, turning her eyes to him once more.
"This isn't nearly enough. I'd have figured a career like yours would be more..." She winced "Lucrative?"
"Of course it is! My books sell excellently. You're not a fan, I take it?"
"I don't read." She answered icily, still eyeing the small sum sprawled across the table, a coin still spinning on it's side. "And if I could, I doubt I'd bother with that."
The ninja-author sniffed indignantly, gathering up his student's hard earned savings, and returning them to Gama chan's eager mouth. "Pah. You don't know what you're missing."
"I'll live." She said with a sigh, her sharpened nails tapping a staccato cadence that seemed to match her impatience. She frowned, poking at the scroll. "I won't, though, if I starve..."The sannin took the hint, and reached once again into his clothes with a roll of his eyes, removing a more appropriate sum of money. Cash only, as per their agreement.
Cashing a cheque was difficult when you were wanted in most countries.
She accepted it cordially, and passed him the scroll, as promised, wasting no time in hiding her pay in her own tamoto. He opened the document, eyes trailing dutifully over each messy line, and clumsy character printed on it. The writing was atrocious, but still barely legible, like a small child's. The paper was invaluable, though. It was an exact, albeit less tidy, copy of a page from Kirigakure no sato's bingo book, her own notes and additions scrawled at the far left edge.
There was something amiss, though, and he warily glanced over the top of the file. His contact had stayed where she was, grinning contentedly. He'd have expected a hasty getaway once her fee was collected, but she made no move to leave.
"You had trouble with Hoshigaki's weapon, didn't you?" The Kunoichi smirked, drawling the words playfully. "It ate your chakra?" An impish glint in icy eyes accompanied the mischievous smile exposing her sharper teeth.
"Not mine," He scowled, brows furrowing. "You know how Samehada works."
"I know how Samehada works."
Another, smaller scroll was withdrawn from her other sleeve, to back up the claim. The sannin groaned. "You want more money, I imagine?"
"No, no!" She giggled. The other's stomach sank, uneasily. If it wasn't money, then she had something worse in mind... "Please! Information's only real value is other information. The only reason I can morally ask for pay is the risk involved in obtaining said information. I'm getting paid to risk my ass, and you've paid me already."
"Then you want information from me."
"Precisely." The young woman nodded happily- much too happily- and he sensed something sinister approaching. Against his better judgement he asked all the same. "Well," She started, and as anticipated, her smirk grew crueler. "You're asking me to sell out one of my countrymen..."
"A renegade countryman." He pointed out.
"As am I. He's one of my kind... I only ask a fair exchange: One of mine, for one of yours."
The sannin paled, leaning back anxious, in his seat. "On who?"
"You know damned well who."
He stared at her sternly, mouth set in a thin line. "So you believe in revenge, but not grief?"
She giggled again, waving the comment off with an airy swish of her hand. "Not revenge, that's just a waste of time. Self preservation is my objective... you know. So I don't end up how he did, and everything." The other said nothing, so she continued, folding her hands before her on the table's surface. "What I want is harmless... Nothing about his weaknesses, or even how that eye of his works. All I want to know is how he got it in the first place. He's no Uchiha... that was someone else's, and I want to know who."
The older drained the remenants of his painfullt neglected glass of sake, andpushed unrulywhite hair from his face with a groan. "Do you remember the war against Tsuchi no kuni?"
She leaned forward, nodding keenly. "My people didn't fight, but I remember it, yes."
He glanced guiltily at the door, and around the deserted establishment, to the stairs to where his student... more accurately his student, slept peacefully. The steady clicking of claws against veneered wood brought him back from his rueful meditations, and he faced the Leopardess once more.
Jiraiya let out heavy, regretful sigh, and weighed the threat of sharing this story, against the threat Hoshigaki Kisame posed to a certain little fox child. It was for Naruto's sake.
"Alright. It was about thirteen years ago, in the grass country..."
ok xD I'm sorry if the end sucked. I was desperate to finish this xD I really hope I didn't have Jiraiya too OOC.
Thank you so much for reading! Please review, and have an awesome day.