Chapter 1
There is a club called the Ouran high School Host Club. The members are Soubi, the President; Inui, the vice-President; Light and L, the twins; Ruki, the charming child; and last but not least Sasuke, Ruki's care-taker. This story begins with Ryoma Echizen, a new kid at school.
From Vive-bleu: There's some cussing and shonen-ai involved, so just be warned.
Ryoma: (thoughts)-Wow the place is huge. I wonder if it has a tennis club. They'd probably be easy to beat, damn rich bastards; they never know how to play. Well, I'm going to beat my dad one day then my life will be complete….oh! But what will I do then? Suicide? Not too boring. Oh I know! I'll run away, get married, and have kids…nope, too happy. Oh well, I'll just live in a state of depression. I can always… *bump*
Damn it! What's this door doing in my way? *opens door*
Club: Welcome to Ouran High School Host Club! (Wearing serving outfits)
Soubi: My, my! What a beautiful girl you are. How may I serve you? *bows and kisses hand*
Ryoma: Eww! Bastard! You're gonna make me catch something if you spit on me. And I'm not a gir-
Soubi: (Cuts in) Oh, you're not a girl…good! I hate girls they're all prissy and girly, me? I like guys, they're hot, but I prefer the cute ones, preferably if they haven't lost their ears yet. Then they seem all innocent and cute, I just wanna…
Inui: Enough Soubi! That's your 10 ½ hit this week, if you keep hitting on guys we'll lose all our customers. Our business is already down 34% and dropping at a steady rate of 2% per week. If this keeps up than by the end of March…
Light: Shut the hell up! I'll kill all of you if you keep talking!
(Quite)
L: Even me brother? *Scoots closer*
Light: well of course not you. *Brushes hair aside, leaning in*
Ruki: Look Sasuke! They're gonna kiss. Then I'll feel all left out. *pouts* Sasuke? Will you kiss me? I'd feel lonely if they were the only ones kissing.
*L and Light get closer*
Sasuke: Look Ruki, I don't like you like that.
Ruki: Please, I'll buy you more ninja stars!
Sasuke: …alright.
*Sasuke and Ruki get closer*
Soubi: Ryoma, I'd feel bad if I were left out too. Kiss me, please. *grabs Ryoma's wrist*
Ryoma: Fuck off bitch! *pulls away* I'm not gay damn it!
Soubi: Ya, but as you can see, we're pretty lenient here. *leans in to Ryoma*
*Light and L kiss*
*Sasuke and Ruki kiss*
*Soubi pulls Ryoma closer, but gets hit with his racket*
Ryoma: I'm out of here, you guys are creeps!
Inui: Wait Ryoma. If I can beat you in a game of tennis will you stay? It would improve business 4% if we got a new member.
Ryoma: (without thinking) Sure! I've been wanting to play forever. Do you guys have courts?
Inui: Of course, please come this way. We will walk through the gym, then outside. There is a vending machine if you get thirsty and also a racket lending centre.
Ryoma: Whatever. *walks off towards the vending machine to buy a Ponta*
Ruki: Yay a match! Can I be a cheerleader Inui? Can I? Can I?
Inui: Sure, in fact, why don't all of you guys cheer?
Light: Hell no…
L: Sounds like fun!
Sasuke: Not a chance.
Soubi: Great!
Ryoma: *Returns with Ponta*Alright, I'm ready. *pulls out racket*
Soubi: Go Ryoma! Beat him up! You can do it! (Cheering)
L: Go Inui! Show him what you've got! (Cheering)
Ryoma: Damn it, how am I supposed to concentrate with that pervert cheering for me?
Soubi: Go Ryoma! I'm not a pervert! You can beat him!
Ryoma: (whispers) I'm doomed!
Inui: *glares evilly* Yep, I already win! *Gasp* hahahahahahahahahahaha-…
Ryoma: Done yet?
Inui: Give me a second. Mwahahahaha! Okay, I'm good, let's go!
Episode 1 End