"We're here, Mommy! We're here!" said Ariana excitedly. "There's Uncle Kurt's car behind you!"
Rachel glanced in her rearview mirror and smiled. Sure enough, there was Kurt in his five-year-old silver station wagon. With a pang she realized that he must have purchased it with a family in mind.
"Is Uncle Blaine here too?"
"I think he's at a rehearsal," said Rachel.
"What's a hersal?" asked Ariana.
"It's when you practice before you put on a show," Rachel tried to explain.
"Did you ever have a hersal when you were on Broadway?" asked Ariana.
"All the time," said Rachel. She pulled in a parking space and nearly jumped with a start when Kurt tapped on the window behind her. He walked his fingers up the windowpane like spider legs and made Ariana laugh, then pulled her out of her car seat when Rachel unlocked the doors.
"Thanks for coming," said Rachel.
"Of course," said Kurt with a smile as he set Ariana down on the floor beside them and grasped her hand. "It's my job to make sure that my nieces are the best dressed children in Brooklyn."
Rachel smiled. "Actually, we're here to do preschool shopping, remember?"
"Of course we are," said Kurt. "She'll need a new backpack for preschool, new crayons, a new lunchbox, new dresses, new shirts, new socks…" Rachel half-grinned doubtfully. "Okay, maybe not socks."
Kurt and Rachel laughed. Ariana beamed. "I'm gonna be a big girl now. Aiden will be the baby and Lily and I will be the big girls."
Kurt and Rachel glanced at each other and laughed again. Neither one of them pointed out that it was only one year before Aiden, too, would be off to preschool.
"All my babies are growing up," Rachel whined jokingly. Then she bit her lip, remembering that Kurt didn't even have a baby yet.
"It's okay," Kurt assured her. "I don't mind."
Rachel didn't say anything, because she knew he did.
"Ariana," said Kurt. "What should we look at first?"
"Everything!" she squealed, squeezing Rachel and Kurt's hands and beaming again, obviously thrilled to be getting ready to be a "big girl" and to be getting special attention from two of the adults in her life.
"I'm sorry, Kurt," said Rachel.
"It's not your fault," said Kurt quietly. "Ariana, I see princess backpacks!"
Ariana squealed and dragged him towards the door before Rachel could say anything else. She grabbed a shopping cart and walked back over to the backpacks.
"I want this one!" Ariana tossed a small backpack to Kurt and he caught it. "And this one!"
"Only one backpack," said Rachel.
Ariana pouted for a second until it became clear that her mother wasn't going to give in. "Uncle Kurt, should I get the Nemo one or the Ariel one?"
"Definitely the Ariel one," said Kurt. "Because she's real." Ariana's eyes widened. "It's true. I met her once. She called me a prince."
Ariana wordlessly hugged the Little Mermaid backpack to her chest and went over to Rachel. "Was Ariel Kurt's real Mommy before Grandma?" she whispered.
Rachel smiled. "Not exactly." She took the backpack and put it in the shopping cart. "Let's go get some more school supplies."
Ariana darted off to a random display of shoes. "She understands step relations now?" Kurt asked.
"Sort of," said Rachel. "Finn tried to explain to her that Grandpa Christopher is her real grandfather and Grandpa Burt is only her step grandfather, but she wasn't having that. Not that you can blame her considering Grandpa Burt lives with us and plays with her every day and Grandpa Christopher is just a picture in a frame."
"Can I wear these shoes now that I'm a big girl, Mommy?" asked Ariana as she clumsily ambled over to them in pink flats about five sizes too big.
"No, sweetie," said Rachel. "Your feet are still too small."
"Aww," said Ariana as Rachel put the shoes back.
"If you're going to get any new shoes for preschool, they should be sneakers," said Rachel.
"But I wanted to buy some heels!" said Ariana. "Uncle Kurt had heels when he was three!"
"How about sneakers with sparkles on them, huh?" said Kurt, stepping in. "Is that a good compromise?"
Ariana stuck out her lip. "Maybe."
Kurt scooped her up and walked off into another aisle that had nothing but rows of children's shoes. Rachel followed.
"These are perfect!" exclaimed Ariana as she slipped her feet into light pink sparkly sneakers with Velcro straps.
"Ari, they're thirty-five dollars," said Rachel. "What about those white ones down there?"
"It's okay," said Kurt. "I'm getting them for her."
Ariana beamed. "Can I pick out a lunchbox now?"
"Of course," said Rachel, patting the three-year-old's head. When Ariana sprinted off in her new shoes, Rachel nudged Kurt. "Thanks. That was nice of you."
Kurt shrugged. "The fact that I might never have kids of my own is all the more reason to enjoy yours, right?"
Rachel took a deep breath. "I want to have your baby."
"What?" said Kurt, nearly jumping because he was so startled.
"I mean it," said Rachel. "I want to be a surrogate for you and Blaine. Of course first I'd have to get my tubes untied, and then we'd have to get an egg donor because if I were the biological mother I'd end up being way too much of a control freak, but…I want you to have a baby, Kurt. I want you to experience all the cuddles and moments of joy and sleepless nights that I have and for my children to have a baby cousin and for…"
Kurt yanked Rachel into a hug before she said anything else.
"Is that a yes?" asked Rachel.
"It's a yes-you're-the-most-amazing-sister-in-law-ever," said Kurt. "Blaine and I have actually been looking into adopting, and I'm not sure if it's going to work out with the agency we're going through right now. But if you're sure you're willing to do this, that'll be our backup plan."
"Sounds good," said Rachel.
"Mommy! Uncle Kurt! I found a new dress!" Ariana held up an aqua dress with a white sash.
"What about this one?" asked Rachel, gesturing to the same dress in pink.
Kurt and Rachel both starred at Rachel like she'd lost her mind. "How do you expect her to wear her new sneakers with that?" asked Kurt.
"You can't wear two shades of the same color, Mommy!" said Ariana.
Rachel surpressed an amused smile. "Oh, I see." As her daughter and Finn's daughter, Ariana had every reason to grow up with no fashion sense whatsoever. But as Kurt's niece...
"Ow, ow, OW! Blaine! Lily! Come help me! He's winning!"
Blaine and Lily rushed into the living room from opposite corners of the house. There was Finn lying on the ground being tackled by Aiden, who had managed to grab a fistful of Finn's not-very-long hair and was pulling it while pressing his left foot into Finn's stomach and giggling uncontrollably. Lily ran over and immediately started tickling Aiden under his arms. The two-year-old released his grip on his father and Finn immediately sat up and flipped him over and started tickling him on the stomach. Blaine joined in after a moment, too.
"'Top it! 'Top it!" shrieked the toddler.
"Okay, okay!" said Finn, Lily and Blaine both stepped back. "Come on, little man," said Finn. "Time for your nap."
"NOOOOO!" screamed Aiden. "Wanna wrestle again!"
"Later, buddy." Finn scooped up the two-year-old and raised his eyebrows in surprise when Aiden started beating him with tiny fists. "Whoa. Maybe there is a reason Rachel is always telling me not get him all hyper before naptime."
Blaine giggled nervously as Finn carried the protesting toddler up the stairs. Blaine was going along with Kurt's mildly obsessive plan to start a family because he could tell how important this was to his husband…but the truth was, Blaine didn't really think he'd be any good at this whole parenting thing. Other than Lily he'd never been any good at babysitting any of his nieces and nephews. He'd nearly had a nervous breakdown trying to change his sister's son's diaper once, and the one time he'd ever been left alone with Finn and Rachel's kids for fifteen minutes he'd lost Ariana at the playground and by the time he'd finally found her he had lost Aiden too. And he'd only been able to take care of Lily on his own successfully when she was about five and older. Four-and-a-half at the youngest.
Lily plopped down on the couch next to Blaine. "Will you help me with my homework?"
Blaine smiled. "Sure. What's it about?"
"It's a diversity project," explained Lily. "I'm supposed to make a family tree of everyone in my immediate family, but I can't fit everyone onto one page."
"Let me have a look," said Blaine. He took the paper from her and glanced at it. "Try to make your lines a little smaller. You aren't leaving a lot of room at the left and right."
Lily extracted a blank piece of paper from her pile and started her family tree over. "And flip the paper horizontally," said Blaine.
"Okay," said Lily. "I have to leave room for pictures above their names, though."
"Try starting with the first generation and working your way down, then."
Blaine watched as Lily carefully mapped out her family tree, starting with Carole and Christopher Hudson and Russell and Judy Fabray and working her way down to her parents and herself. Then she factored in Rachel, her half-siblings, and Burt Hummel.
"What was Kurt's mother's name?" asked Lily.
Blaine closed his eyes. "Mollie. Mollie Melrose Hummel." Kurt had told him about fifty times now that he really wanted his daughter's first or middle name to be Mollie. Blaine wondered for a moment what he would be worse at handling, a baby boy or a baby girl. Definitely a boy. Especially if they had a son and he turned out to be the butchiest jock alive. That would never work. Finn and Kurt would have to raise him. Kurt could be the mom and Finn could be the dad. So the kid would have three dads. And one of them would be straight…
"Is it true that you were at the party my mom was drunk at before she died?"
Blaine blinked, jerked back to reality. "What?"
Lily had filled in Kurt's mother and her two uncles and was now pasting small headshots of Finn and Quinn above their names. "Daddy said you were there."
"Um…yeah, I was," said Blaine. "I was too drunk by the time she got there to remember much, though."
"Oh," said Lily, obviously disappointed.
"I remember Kurt tried to call a cab for her and she shoved him," said Blaine, gently trying to indulge her. "She was too drunk to think straight."
"Was she mad at him before she got drunk?"
Blaine shifted in his seat and Lily gazed up at him intensely with big green eyes. "Not really," Blaine finally said. "I think she was in a bad mood when she got there."
"Why?" asked Lily.
Blaine absent-mindedly started to bite his left thumbnail. "Um…" How much was Lily supposed to know about the night Quinn died? Did she know that Finn and Quinn had been broken up? That they'd just had a fight? That he'd thrown her out of his house?
Blaine glanced down at Lily's family tree. Surely she didn't know who's face she almost would have been putting in the spot next to Quinn's, if things had gone just a bit differently?
"Why are you looking at my family tree?" asked Lily accusingly.
Blaine looked up and shook with a start. "I was just trying to remember," he attempted to say smoothly. "I think she'd just had a fight with your Grandpa Fabray. She stopped to see him on the way there. Not sure exactly what happened." Blaine looked away and bit his lip, afraid that he'd already said too much.
"Oh," said Lily. "You don't know what they were fighting about?" She fidgeted with her hands for a moment and then began cutting out headshots of Burt and Carole.
"Nope," said Blaine. "We didn't talk at the party. She just spent the whole time laying around on the floor and laughing with Rachel and talking nonsense."
"I thought you said you were too drunk to remember," said Lily innocently.
Oh, shit. Blaine bit his lip and starred at the carpet as Lily pasted in pictures of him and Kurt onto her family tree.
"Finally got him to fall asleep," said Finn as he entered the room with an exhausted look on his face. "Thank god. What are you up to?"
"Look at my project," said Lily. She smiled and held up her family tree. There were only two faces missing. "I need a picture of Grandpa Christopher," said Lily.
"We'll ask Grandma for one," said Finn. "I don't have very many."
"Okay," said Lily. "Do you think Kurt would give me a picture of his mom?"
"Absolutely," said Blaine. "Anytime he gets a chance to talk about her it makes his day."
"Blaine, don't you have a rehearsal to go to?" asked Lily.
"Right," said Blaine, he got up quickly. "Later, Finn."
"Later," said Finn. He sat down next to Lily on the couch. "This looks good! Where did you get that photo of me?"
"I asked Rachel for it," said Lily. "I think she said it's from your wedding reception."
Blaine sighed with relief the moment he stepped outside the front door of Finn's house. Seriously, if he couldn't even help his eleven-year-old niece with her homework without screwing something up, how was he supposed to be trusted with a baby of his own?
On some highway in the middle of the United States, the connection between Puck's large pickup truck and his favorite radio station was going static. He grumbled to himself and reached for the "seek" button. The first clear station he could find was in the middle of playing a song he'd never heard.
Hate the mind, regrets are better left unspoken
For all we know, this void will grow
And everything's in vain, distressing you won't leave me open
Feels so right, but I'll end this all before it gets me
Some words are better left unspoken. That was what Finn had said to Puck during that fateful conversation.
"Do you think…that she'll ever know that I'm her birth father?"
"I don't think so. Some words are better left unspoken."
Call your name every day, when I feel so helpless
I'm falling down, but I'll rise above this, rise above this
Call your name every day when I seem so helpless
I'm falling down, but I'll rise above this, rise above this doubt
Puck stepped on the gas and left the central time zone behind. Hell yeah he was going to rise above this.
A/N: YAAAAY Kurt and Blaine are gonna have a baby! But do you guys think it should be adopted or that Rachel should be their surrogate? And should it be a boy or a girl? I have an idea of the direction I'm taking that storyline in but I'm open to suggestions. Also, for the full story of Baby Kurt Goes To Disney World And Meets Ariel, read chapter 112 of Tumbled by Keitorin Asthore. YOU WILL NOT REGRET IT. There's also the story in there about Blaine failing to babysit his nephew.