II.

This is defeat:

The last thing he thought would happen was Howard becoming something of a confidant.

Ever since he and Bernadette moved to New York, following Penny and Sheldon, the two couples found solace in confiding in each other. Without Leonard and Raj in the middle, Sheldon found he actually enjoyed the conversations he and the engineer had. No, he didn't have a PhD or any type of doctorate, but he was wise in ways Sheldon was less than thrilled to admit, he wasn't.

So, he found it only logical that he sat in the living room of the Wolowitz's, a few hours after Penny admitted she was pregnant.

He hadn't meant to run, but it was the only response he knew how to do. A baby? Him? Penny? Were they even ready? He would be lying if he said he wasn't scared, and that in itself scared him because he knew everything there was to know and this was one thing he didn't. But now that he was away from his fiancée and their unborn child, he found it easier to think. He wasn't crowded by his emotions for her, he could think logically.

Bernadette had hit him over his head when he confessed to what he did. Of course, she'd be on Penny's side. She then kissed Howard and their child goodbye and informed the men she was going to check up on Penny, it had been a few hours since then.

"Wow, it looks like we're all going to be dads then," was all Howard offered.

He shot him a glance, "Is Raj expecting too?"

Howard only nodded.

"Fabulous," it was sarcastic, "Maybe we could all join a daddy daycare."

The shorter man couldn't help but smirk at his friend's sarcasm. He had come so far from the days of naiveté and ignorance, now sat a man who was going to be married soon, and a father sooner than that. He put a hand on the scientists back, "You know, if you told me five years ago that it would be you that ended up with Penny and not Leonard, I would've laughed so hard I would get a hernia…" he trailed off as he thought about it, "Probably would've told Leonard that you were planning to make moves on Penny too," he admitted ashamedly.

Howard wasn't proud of his past. Just before moving to New York, when Amy and Leonard were well involved with each other, he reflected on his friends and his involvement in a lot of the downfall that came upon Sheldon. Most of it was at the beck and call of Leonard, he was like a puppet master and Raj and he were the lonely minions who felt like they didn't have a choice in the matter because they were anti-social and would never do any better than Leonard. Leonard wasn't a bad guy, he was selfish and manipulative, yes. Maybe even whiny too. But, underneath his layers of insecurities he was a great guy. For that he couldn't lose his friendship, but instead just distanced himself from the man. He didn't like who he became when he was with him.

"Well that doesn't seem to be accurate anymore, I believe I messed up again, Howard."

"How?"

He held up a keyring hanging off his finger, a few keys click-clacking together, "I ran away again."

That was another thing Howard couldn't believe, Sheldon was driving now.

"Then you go back, and you fix this. You ran because you were scared, you were surprised. That's completely understandable, but what's not right was you leaving her in the state she's in. Explain to her how you feel and hold her all night. Fix it," Howard offered helpfully.

Before Sheldon could reply, his phone rang.

"That's odd," he stated looking at the screen, "It's Bernadette."

This is what moving backwards feels like:

"Bestie?"

Her face was tear stained, and her hair was a mess, but she tried her best to put on a smile for her friend.

It hurt like hell standing in the hall of the apartment complex she once called home, knocking on the door she once was able to just walk right through. It was the only place she knew she could go to without having to get into too much of an explanation. He had left her, and she was done chasing him. No more games. If he wasn't ready to commit to her then she'd leave and become a single mother. Except she wouldn't be a completely single mother, she'd have the support of all her friends.

The next morning when she woke up, in the guest room, which was painfully her fiancés old room, she forced herself to not look around. She was met with too many memories. Soft Kitty. Vicks Vapor Rub. Dolls – no Action Figures. Nobody is allowed in my room Penny! (Yeah, well now she's sharing a bed with him every night, so…who's the loser now, Sheldon).

She exits the room in a rush, bleary eyed as she moves towards the kitchen.

"So…"

She looks at him, it's the first time she's alone with him since they officially broke up even though they weren't really together. But there was this lingering energy, and it was weird and awkward, and everybody just knew there was something unresolved between them. But then Sheldon, and now she's on her way to becoming Mrs. Sheldon Cooper, and wasn't it the least she could do to tell him privately?

"Leonard…"

He just raises a mug towards her, and she accepts it thankfully. "It's been a while since you been within these walls, huh?"

And she thinks he's trying to be nice, but she could hear the bitterness in his voice and she wonders if he's not completely over her and she suddenly regrets getting on the airplane because she's not trying to complicate things further, she just needed a friend and the only one she could think of was Amy. Her fiancés ex-girlfriend. Geez, did they all just rotate each other around?

"Yeah."

"So, relationship problems?"

Was that a spark in his eye?

"Something like that."

At this point it was impossible to deny the smirk on his face as he looked into his mug of black liquid, "I always thought you guys would make the long haul, you know opposites attract and all of that." She frowned deeply, seriously Leonard?

"And we will. It's just a rough patch, something we'll make it through," she hoped.

He shrugged and walked around the island towards her, "I hope so. I'd be devastated if everyone was in their own world and relationship and you and Sheldon were falling apart before our eyes." If she didn't know him, she'd think he was being genuine, but…she knew him.

She bit back, "How's your son? The one you had with Amy. What was his name again?"

Leonard rubbed his eyes tiredly, "Wesley," he answered slowly. She only nodded, understanding it was based off the Star-Trek character. "Ah, Wesley, where is he?"

"Amy sent him off to her mother's, she plans to hang out with you all day or something," his tone changed, and she could finally breathe. She didn't want to be doing this with him right now anyways, she had more pressing matters to think of other than her bitter ex.

There was a silence between the both of them, and she didn't know how to fill it. He was right, this was the first time in a very long time she's been here, and she came back on terrible circumstances. She didn't feel completely comfortable in here like she used to, especially with Leonard staring at her the way he was. The furniture was either rearranged or gone, and it hurt her seeing the couch being replaced. She couldn't help but think how dare they, but then it was his apartment now and she and Sheldon did live across the country. So how dare she.

"Do you think that maybe we-"

She rolled her head, "Leonard," she groaned, she didn't want to do this now.

"I'm just asking, Penny. Don't you think it's the least I deserve, after everything?"

Was he really pulling the guilt card? She told him so many times how sorry she was, but ultimately, she owed him nothing, they weren't an item. They were both single, and it wasn't her fault that he decided to not do anything about it. So, why did she feel bad?

"Do you think despite me having Wesley, and you being engaged, that there could ever be something between us again?" He was hesitant at first, but slowly grew more confident, "It's just, every time I look at you, I get those feelings again and I think you know it too. Even if we had a bad relationship, I think we'll always have this indescribable connection."

She shook her head, "I can describe it. Friendship."

He narrowed his eyes, "Penny…" he moved to touch her left hand and she immediately pulled away before he could grab her. He glared but before he could say anything she did, "I'm pregnant, Leonard."

He dropped his arm immediately, "Pregnant?"

She nodded firmly; she wasn't here to be hit on by him. She was here for clarity and possibly comfort from Amy, "Yes. And Sheldon is the father, before you ask," she glared at him. He was shocked.

Of all the time the passed by within the group, he never believed she and Sheldon would make it. They were an odd couple and they'd surely bite each other's head off before they move in together. But then they moved to New York, well, Sheldon moved for Penny and it was the most dramatic and spontaneous thing he had ever seen his roommate do. He began to worry after that. Maybe he wouldn't be getting Penny back?

But then in his sorrow and pain, he and Amy began speaking and eventually speaking turned to more. Amy was tired of not having her desires and needs met, and Leonard was just desperate. They had sex. Multiple times. And through their careless actions Amy got pregnant with his first child. Amy was a lot more excited than he was, and she had already told her family. Leonard felt stuck.

But then Sheldon and Penny visited, and he saw them interact, long gone was his roommate who needed a special pair of pants to just ride the bus. Instead stood a man who had a woman he loved and would do anything to keep her by his side. It made him sick. He was glad when during their visit they had an argument, it was small, but it was enough to show Leonard that it wasn't all good between them. Maybe he still did stand a chance.

They went back to New York, and he hadn't seen them again. Until he woke up this morning and saw Penny.

"You…and Sheldon?"

Penny narrowed her eyes, "What? Did you think Sheldon and I wouldn't have sex?"

Before he could answer, Amy came bursting into the apartment.

"Bestie, Wes is at my moms, so we have all day together. Tell me everything!"

This won't be cliché:

Sheldon buys a ticket to Pasadena. He shows up at his old apartment, begging Leonard to tell him where his fiancée is. Tell me now, Leonard! She's out with Amy, a park. Sheldon buys flowers, balloons, chocolates, everything. He hails a cab, no that would take too long, he gets an Uber. He gets to the park; he finds the familiar head of blonde hair. He could always spot her out in a sea of blondes. He finds her. She's shocked –he knew she would be. Amy is smiling. Penny is crying. He's on his knees, he loves her, he's begging, he's apologizing. He was stupid. He was careless. He was an idiot. Please baby, please! They're kissing.

She forgives him. She loves him. They go home.

Curtain falls.

Sheldon does call Penny though; she lets it ring.

Not long after he receives a text from her, it reads:

'I'll be ok if I never see you again.'