A/N:

Hello once again! Damn! Another chapter in just one night! I wish more authors were like me! Actually i wouldnt, because i have an apology to make. This is only half the size of the last chapter, and usually i try to make it equal or bigger. But i just couldnt contain myself. I LOVE this chapter. Especially a certain sentence... about pie. Yeah. Read on and you will find out! It isnt a real cliffy (because i have to literally force myself to make a chapter a cliffhanger...) but its just a taste of a lick of what is going to come soon enough.

No duck today... i haven't perfected his surgery..

OCTOBER 25TH AT 4:50 AM

(This isn't all that important…just so you know…)

Damn fucking Potter. Always entering my thoughts whenever I deem him unworthy (as usual that is 24/7). How am I supposed to get my Not-Very-Much-Needed-But-Still-Nice-To-Have Beauty Sleep? How dare he intrude upon my sacred land that is my mind, spittle upon the very essence of my being, and cause me to question my sexual interests! How dare he make me crack, letting Blaise, the LAST person (except maybe Potter himself) I would want to know that I was gay… oh god. It's all over. I said it. I'M GAY!

THE NEXT MORNING

(Goodness, I wish I had the capabilities to add the sound affects that are in my head, onto this ficcy, you all would quiver in unadulterated and immeasurable love!)

"Oh what a looker he is!"

"My my, if that Piece of Heaven walked over to my side of town" pause for sound effect that Draco clearly distinguished as a sound made at a warm slice of pecan pie "he would never make it out alive…"

The Slytherin girl's catcalled and howled with an appreciation over the statement. Draco sighed in disgust, not believing the horrific conversation he was forced to endure.

"To bad he is gay" a haughty voice came over the crowd. All of the girls in the conversation (including Draco) looked up to see a dark haired female with a smug look. (A/N: I'll give you 10 seconds to guess who it is…)

"What makes you say that Pansy?" one girl cried incredulously. The other girls nodded. Draco himself (though he would never admit it) was curious also.

"This is why." She flicked a picture of the man the girls were swooning over, making out with a handsome fellow.

"Oh, why are the gorgeous ones always gay!" one girl moaned in overdramatic agony.

"A question that has plagued females for centuries." Pansy replied wisely. She purposely looked at Draco, whose eyes narrowed considerably. He turned to look at Blaise, who was whistling a not so innocent tune, sounding almost unmistakably like the opening of Brokeback Mountain. Which Draco had never seen of course… (cough cough). He sided himself next to his dark skinned companion and remained a cool exterior.

"Have any nice chats with Pansy lately, Blaise ol' chap?" death lingered behind every word.

"Eh…. No?" Blaise tried for the easy getaway, hoping that Draco was to distracted by his thoughts to tell he was lying.

"Oh really, I just thought maybe…" he grabbed a piece of Blaise's side with his fingers, twisting it none to gently. "…you had."

"AHHH! FINE FINE FINE!" Draco released the poor boys flesh, fixing his prey with a cold glare instead. Blaise composed himself, with a little difficulty concerning the glare, and spoke again, this time in a hushed voice. "I figured it out on my own and so did she, we just so happened to come to the same conclusion after Potter brought you back from the hospital wing."

Draco growled slightly. Knowing this was most likely as true as the boy's statement was going to get.

"Thank you, Zabini." He glided over to where the girls were seated again, tapping Pansy's shoulder twice and made his way out of the great hall.

When he reached the hallway he intended to find, he sat there, in wait of his co-conspirator.

"What now, Malfoy?"

"Ah, Parkinson, glad you could join me. Have a seat." Draco smiled at the large tile next to him, as he patted it commandingly. She looked at the tile as if it was a rare tropical monkey that carried at least 12 diseases, 4 unknown.

"I said sit, Pan." The blonde had lost his cool now. Pansy sighed and sat in her designated spot. Draco gave all hopes of a smile and turned to her.

"I'm gay."

"Yes I know that." She stated matter-of-factly.

"Just making sure."

"I see."

"So I guess you also know I want to shag Potter."

"…"

"Oh bloody hell." Draco threw out a slew of oaths.

"Well that was blunt." Pansy had a smile on her face now. "So what do you need me for?"

"Well…" Draco began, "At first I was just going to make you swear never to tell a soul about my, ahem, newfound not-so-hetero-sexuality…"

"But…?"

"But now you know to much."

"…"

"So I have two choices."

"And those are?"

"1) I can kill you…"

"…"

"…"

"Draco…"

"…What…?"

"DRACO FOR GODSAKES TELL ME WHAT THE OTHER OPTION IS!"

"Oh, right." His silver brows knotted together gracefully as he adorned a frown "The other is that I get your help in winning over the mangy Gryffindor."

"…"

"What?"

"…"

"What are you on about now, Parkinson?"

"You mean, help you to get him to shag you, right?"

"Oh! Yes, ahem, that's what I meant."

"Your looking a bit flushed."

"…"

"Oh gods…"

"What!"

"You love the bag of filth."

"I absolutely do not."

"Oh yes you do Draco, I can see it in your eyes," She pulled down his lower lids to give the sentence full effect, only to have her hands slapped away, "a woman can tell."

"Oh, bullocks!"

"Drays in loooooove!" she taunted, waggling her fingers to the world-wide-known tune of doom and destruction.

"AHG! I should have never told you!" He made he way to storm out of the hall. What stopped him was a rather forceful tackle made by the taunting female who was now latched upon his back. She continued to taunt him as he was pinned against the ground, that is, until they heard a cough from above them.

"Malfoy, Parkinson. What in God's name are you doing?"

Harry Potter looked mighty and bold, with his constantly disheveled hair, his complete lack of fashion sense, and such impeccably horrid timing. To him this was a clear sign of a lovers spat, almost to the point of makeup sex in the middle of a hallway. Draco looked at him with bloodshot eyes (Pansy's damn nail polish irritated his beautiful silver eyes) and Harry could clearly see them coming from more than one sleepless, but not in anyway or form boring, night.

"Take it somewhere else, besides right next to the Great Hall, or I'll have to report you to a prefect." He looked at them again, this time not hiding his disgust, turned and walked away. Draco could feel his heart breaking… or maybe that was his ribs…

"PAN GET THE HELL OFFA ME!" he bellowed, tossing in pain. She stood up, dusted herself off, and glared down at him.

"Luckily Potter didn't seem to notice your lack of comebacks, unlike me, or else this plan I am concocting may not work!"

"Plan?" Draco asked skeptically, dusting himself off, "What plan?"

"Not telling until I get the details straight, no use in raising your hopes."

"It better not be some bloody love potion."

"No… or at least, not one that one would normally call a love potion." She grinned evilly and hurried off.

: ( no duck : (

A/N:

See! Short and sweet! I know its not even half of whata real chapter should be, but its better than nothin right? Right! Seriously gotta stop talking to myself.

May the breeze keep on blowin, May the current carry you swiftly, May the reveiws follow quickly behind...