II
Dazed
April 2022
"VIVIAN!" I roll my eyes as my charming mother yells up the stairs.
"Yes, mother?"
"Come down this instant!" I oblige, simply because I have nothing better to do. The Spring Holiday is supposed to be a time of revision for end of year exams, NEWTs or in my case OWLs, personally I find the holiday rather boring as revision is not something I have ever done, either I know it already or I will never know it.
"Yes, mother?" I repeat once I enter the kitchen where my mother is sat picking at a bowl of vegetable soup, now that I think about it, I don't think I have ever actually seen my mother eat anything, she just plays with her food, pushing it around on her plate.
"We are going shopping." I have to resist the urge to pull a face, I hate shopping, especially with my mother. I wait patiently for her to go on, because we never just go shopping, there is always a reason for it and sure enough: "We have been invited to a party." My lack of response seems to bother her. "Aren't you excited? Some human interaction will be good for you; you spend far too much time shut up in that room of yours. It's a wonder you do not bore yourself to death." If only she knew, I spend the majority of each day trying to figure out what on earth I am supposed to do with this whole being fifteen (almost sixteen) and pregnant thing, which does not leave me much time for being bored.
"Of course mother," I reply, the ever pleasing daughter (for now at least).
"Good, we are leaving now." She holds out her arm and I take it, the twisting sensation of apparition consumes me. Blinking, I regain my balance, Diagon Alley comes into view but not just any part, the rich part, the part where shops have wizards and witches stationed in the doorways. This must be an important party.
The first shop we enter is the dressmakers; my mother selects a rather pretty (for her taste) dark emerald dress for me and instructs the seamstress to fit it for me. I stand on the odd boxy thing as she starts fiddling with the hem, as she progresses up the dress I become a little uncomfortable as she stretches the material tight over my stomach. I know I'm not showing yet but all the same, I don't need the reminders thank you very much.
Once the dress was sorted, we move on to the shoe shop, then the hair salon and the nail parlour, the jewellery shop and at last to the makeup artist's salon. Once we were entirely made up and had collected the dress, we apparate back home.
"Go and put your dress on now Vivian," my mother orders, she seems uncharacteristically flustered and my curiosity is almost aroused. "We must look perfect."
I oblige my mother once again and within minutes I am back in the living room looking far too glamorous for my liking. Once my father arrives home and is harassed by my mother until he is presentable we gather in the kitchen and apparate to goodness knows where.
"The Ministry?" I ask with actual surprise in my voice.
"Yes dear, didn't I tell you?" my mother really is flustered.
"Why?"
"What do you mean?"
"Why are we here?"
"Because the Ministry is holding a Ball in honour of Harry Potter's defeat of the Dark Lord and they wanted to hold it before the students went back to school. We must look immaculate, we wouldn't want them to think we supported the dark arts now would we?" My mother is worried, I mean actually worried. My father on the other hand simply snorts, he doesn't care what anyone thinks, if there is something in the way of what he wants, he uses whatever way is necessary to remove it, in fact the only think he seems incapable of removing is his irritating wife.
"Hold on… the Potter's will be here?" Realisation dawns on me. Great.
"Well of course darling, it is a Ball in honour of them." Sighing, I realise that no matter how hard I try to pretend everything is normal, nothing will change the fact that I am pregnant with Albus Potter's child. Even at a party I have been dragged to Potter will be here and I will no doubt have to face him at the request of my mother, who seems determined to make sure everyone knows we are fully against the dark arts. "Oh look, here they come now."
Sure enough, Harry Potter and his wife Ginevra have entered on the other side of the room. Mr Potter is looking extremely uncomfortable with the amount of attention he is receiving and Mrs Potter is smiling a smile that does not reach her eyes as she places herself tactfully between the pressing crowd and her husband, protecting him. Mr Potter turns to look in our direction and my stomach lurches, he looks just like Albus.
Behind them come their three children: Lily, wearing a modest dark red dress with her flaming red hair done up in a simple bun (the tired look on her face makes her look so much older than thirteen); then Albus, who – like his father – seems to shy away from the hordes of people greeting him and, at last, James. Unlike his father and younger brother, James loves the attention, he smiles and waves, shaking hands and clapping people on the back. He even grins wickedly in my direction, right at me, making eye contact… why? I may be insanely in love with him but he doesn't know that, I didn't think he even knew my name… why is he grinning at me like that? He couldn't… Albus didn't… Albus wouldn't… oh Merlin… he knows. James Potter knows I shagged his little brother. Kill me now.
"Alright Viv?" my gaze snaps away from the grinning James and lands on Violet who has crept up beside me. "See you've been dragged here too, unless of course you have some connection to the Potter family?" Vi's eyes lighten up at the prospect of new gossip but I adamantly deny having anything to do with the Potters, which of course is a lie but at least a plausible one.
"Darling are you going to introduce us to your friend?"
"Mother, this is Violet Briggs, Vi, this is my mother," I roll my eyes at Vi who represses a giggle.
"A pleasure to meet you Miss Briggs, I have always longed to meet Vivian's friend but she refuses to invite anyone around…"
"I wonder why," I mutter darkly under my breath. "I'm just going to get a drink, Vi you coming?" I can see my mother itching to correct my grammar so grab Vi's arm and drag her away before either can say another word.
"You have a nice mum," I assume Vi is being sarcastic but when I see her face, I'm not so sure.
"Mmm…" The evening passes slowly, Mr Potter gives a brief speech about how he couldn't possibly have defeated Riddle without the help of his friends, I can see the tips of his ears (which stick out slightly from his untameable hair) have turned a light shade of red. After that, the dancing commences and I leave Vi with some tall blonde guy from the year above. I retreat to the corner of the hall and return to thinking about my fate and am so deep in my thoughts that I don't notice someone approach me.
"Care to dance?" I look up into deep brown eyes that twinkle with mischief and almost forget where I am. My brain has lost control of my body and I find myself nodding and follow him onto the dance floor. This is not happening. I am not dancing with James Potter.
"So, what do you want?" I mentally kick myself for asking such a dumb question… then again maybe it's a good idea because I am after all, pregnant with his brother's baby.
"What do you mean?" He grins, why is he always grinning?
"Well, you're James Sirius Potter, you could dance with any girl in this room – including those Veela women over there – so you must have a particular reason to dance with me, it's not like we know each other and I am certainly not the most attractive female here."
"I beg to differ, you are by far one of the most attractive women here and I am offended you think me so shallow," I can tell he's playing with me so I stubbornly say nothing. "Besides, I thought I should get to know the girl who is causing so much friction in my family." I'm so shocked I momentarily forget to keep dancing and almost stumble straight into another couple.
"What friction?" I ask bluntly.
"Now that would be telling," he winks; I could slap him. Spinning around, I lose sight of him and when I find myself back in Potter's arms; it is not the same Potter's arms I left. Out of the corner of my eye I see James twirling another redhead around.
"Potter," I say curtly, furious with James for abandoning me with no explanation.
"Nott," he replies stiffly. Well this is awkward. We finish the dance in silence and at the first chance we get he lets go of me and walks away – apparently dancing with me had not been his plan either.
"Ooh, Vivian darling, were you just dancing with one of the Potters?" My mother shuffles up behind me, trust her to notice something like that. I nod, the Potter boys have a knack for putting me in a foul mood. I turn into the crowd before my mother has a chance to ask another question and find myself face to face with one of the few people I would actually consider as a friend.
"Scorp, how's it going?" Scorpius Malfoy gathers me in a breath taking bear hug.
"Viv, I've been looking all over for you. Where've you been?" he asks letting me go at last.
"Dancing," the dark look on my face prevents him asking further, he knows me too well.
"Well would you fancy a turn about the floor with your old friend?" He holds out his hand, ever the gentleman, if only it was his baby I was having and not his archenemy's. Yes, to add to my already complex situation, my best friend hates the father of my unborn child.
"I suppose," I had better make the most of his friendship before he finds out what I've done. Dancing with Scorp is less awkward than dancing with a Potter and puts me in a considerably better mood… that is until I get tapped on the shoulder.
"Forgive me, Mr Malfoy, but you appear to have stolen my dance partner." In love with him I may be but right now I could kill him. Scorp looks at me in confusion and I just stand there, speechless, part of me desperate for James to sweep me off my feet and part of me wanting Scorp to break his nose.
My silence choses for me, Scorp (looking confused, angry and a little hurt) backs off into the crowd and James takes his place.
I glare at James and say nothing.
"Really, Vivian, you would look much prettier if you smiled."
"It's Miss Nott to you, and you sound like my mother."
"Well then Miss Nott, you must have a very intelligent mother whom I would dearly love to be acquainted with, may I take the liberty of inviting your entire family to dine with us tomorrow eve at Pendragon Place, our current place of residence," James' voice is mocking but I take little notice, my heart is beating so loud I can hardly hear a word he is saying.
"So, when are you planning to dump me on your brother again to take off with some redhead?"
"Please, forgive me, I had no intention of dumping you on anyone and that 'redhead' happens to be my cousin, Lucy."
"I should've guessed, I swear the majority of people here are related to you somehow," I snort. It's true: James' mum had six older brothers, four of whom have wives and children on their own.
"My dear Miss Nott, I think if you trace back far enough, the entire wizarding world is related to each other somehow." I do not reply and neither of us speaks for the remainder of the dance.
"Thank you Mr Potter, I appreciate you not abandoning me again but I really must go, my mother will be wondering where I am." I smile as the dance finishes and then vanish into the crowd before he can stop me. A hand on my wrist tells me I was too slow.
"Miss Nott, you will not leave me in such a manner," James has pulled me back to him so that I am inches from his face, even closer than when we were dancing.
"I-" for the second time, my body refuses to obey my brains instruction to pull away and I find myself froze to the spot. His eyes are so deep and I wonder if maybe, just maybe, there is the deeper side to James that I always suspected there was.
"Miss Nott… Vivian…" This is so wrong. I am pregnant with his brother's child. Oh, James. At first I can barely feel his lips on mine, they just hover, hardly touching, but then they press firmer and I find myself responding. What am I doing? He is so gentle, so perfect; my heart beats wildly in my chest. This cannot be happening.
I don't know how long we stood like that but at last he pulls away, I cannot help but feel disappointed. Blinking, I look into his beautiful eyes.
"See you at school," he whispers before fading into the crowd. I remain dumbstruck on the spot, people push past me but I hardly notice. Did I just kiss James Potter?