They took my book…the one they tell me to write in. I got caught writing about that place again. They keep telling me that if I write about that other place, I'll never get better.

What if I did not want to get better? What if I wanted to just stay with these memories I have?

Were they even real memories? I cannot tell anymore what is real and what is not. I am told one thing and my heart keeps repeating another. This cannot go on and my heart knows it, but my head has not been able to catch up.

Funny thing they say about the heart…it always seems to lead without any type of intellectual thought to pass through it.

One thing I did know is that I was trying to get back to someone…

There was someone who I could not live without and who could not live without me…

My brain forms a headache and stops my train of thought before it can send an image of who that person is. I cannot forge his face, but I can forge his emotions…

Strength. Charm. Intelligence. Fierceness. Loss. Love…

I know every one of these emotions are powerful and they drive them to be who they are, but why did I feel like one of those things was lost. It was something that I helped them find.

For the life of me, what that one thing was is gone as well. This whole thing just sucked. How the hell was someone supposed to get better if they could not tell what exactly was causing this…this…

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"I'm sorry. I'm where exactly?" The disbelief was clear in my voice. It was evident on their faces.

"You cannot be serious? You really do not believe us?" I shook my head once slowly turning every which way to see if I was somehow being pranked. The cameras and crew should be arriving any time now.

"Are the cameras coming out? This is a joke, right?" Both boys looked at each other and then back at her.

"You know, Sakura, you are almost as mad as the Hatter…."

"I'm sorry, the who?"

"Oh dear…March we got a real case of blind-mindedness. Which is rich coming from me since we all know that you are the real basket case," Cheshire remarked off handedly. He let go of my hand to look at me again. "I swear there was not a thing wrong with you, but your brain seems to be quite the opposite. Must be the fact that her hair looks like a pink blossom from the Forest of Cherries."

I was annoyed at the fact that my hair color was brought up in the fact that I was not intelligent. These block heads did not know the half of it. I was a striving medical student with a 4.0 GPA. I lived in one of the most prestige cities and worked under the lead medical doctor of the hospital. They did not know jack shit about me and my hair color was not something that should have been mentioned to my memory problems.

"Listen here, asshole. My hair is not the cause of me not being able to make sense of this. I'll have you know that I am top of my class, 4.0 GPA, assistant under one of the best medical doctor's in the world, AND I'm the most intelligent within my friend group." I stated hotly as I stared both boys down with my nose turned up.

I hated being told that the reason I was so unique was because of my hair color. Yes, it does define me when someone is trying to spot me in a crowd. Makes it hard to play games in the dark because you can see it, but it DOES NOT make me for insane or not insane. Because I am not. They could both suck it and learn a little respect.

As if they could sense that I was upset, both boys put on a frown and apologetic look.

"We did not mean anything by it, Sakura-chan," March said with the uncharacteristic frown. The "chan" part was a new addition to my name and I did not know how I felt about it seeming as I had just met them a few minutes ago. "Both of us were just trying to maybe give you a sense of what was happening to ya. Guess that was not the best solution we could have come up with."

I huffed.

"Of course, it wasn't, you block head. What kind of person wants to listen to someone else call them insane! Have you seen yourself? Looked in a mirror? I don't think you have because I can tell you right now that this…this…" My head started to turn as black spots started to over take my vision. I was working myself up for no reason and it was causing me to get light-headed.

This had happened many times before when I was in high school and I would get into these arguments with a blind headed, black haired boy who drove me absolutely up the wall. I learned after a while to control myself and to breath, not letting things get to me in the way that they did. More often than not it would become overwhelming and too much to handle. Anxiety had been what the doctors talked it up to be. Pretty sure it was also borderline of panic attacks as well. I was taught to find anchors and find something else to focus on in these times.

I found those anchors now in my mind. The looks of my friends faces, the way we used to laugh at the dumbest things. The fact that we had so many happy thoughts. The blackness in my vision started to fade and my breathing became regular again.

"Are you okay?" Cheshire asked as they took a tentative step toward me as if afraid I was going to explode again.

I did not trust myself to speak and shook my head instead. I felt warmth on my hands again and looked to either side of me. Both boys had again grabbed my hands and had small smiles on their faces.

"We will go see Hatter, then we will figure out how we can get you back to where you say you're from."

I smiled at the boys and once again shook my head. This time my speechlessness came from a warmth in my heart I was beginning to develop for them.

—

The walk seemed to take forever and the fact that after the long walk I was pointed in the direction of a house on top of a huge hill did not set well.

"I am not walking up that huge hill," I remarked with a huff, stopping myself in my tracks. Cheshire and March stopped a few steps ahead and looked back at me. The long walk did not seem to bother them in the least bit.

"It's not that bad, Sakura-chan," March said with as much enthusiasm as a five-year-old on Christmas. "The hill seems a lot bigger because that is how Hatter wants it to look. Call it magic or a trick of the mind I guess, but it is why he doesn't have a lot of visitors. Most of them don't want to climb up the 'big hill' just like you."

"Then you are carrying me because my legs are about to fall off more than they were an hour ago when you said we did not have to walk that much farther."

Though the walk was beautiful, it did take forever. There were more weird things in this place than I had ever thought could be possible. Birds could talk. Not just the 'chirp chirp' kind of talk either. I'm talking full on sentences as they flew over us. The flowers had faces and voices as well; which they did not seemed to fond of me when I was walking by with March and Cheshire. My stomach had growled along the journey, but neither of the boys would let me stop to pick any of the fruit from the bushes or trees. Said that did strange things to you if you did not know what they were. The trees seemed to sway in the nonexistent wind that was going by as if there was some secret music they were listening to. I could have gone for that to make this trip quicker.

Both the boys had talked the whole time about how I would meet some of their friends at the Hatter's house and that they would love me on first sight. Strange how I felt comfortable with that statement and I hadn't even met these people; I just felt that I truly needed their approval.

"Really, Sakura-chan, it isn't that bad," Cheshire grinned as he took a few steps away. I plopped myself on the ground with a determined look on my face.

"I told you I wasn't going to be walking up that huge ass hill even if it isn't. Try again sunshine or you will just be leaving me here to be eaten by some wild animal." I crossed my arms for emphasis and put on my best glare. It worked other times with my friends, I was hoping it would have the same effect here.

Looking at each other, the boys shrugged and with one last glance at me, took off running. Up the huge ass hill. Leaving me by myself. In the dark. To be eaten.

The sun was setting and not even a minute later, I was off my feet chasing the two jerks who had left me to die. I could hear their laughter as I caught up and they slowed down. I caught up to them and gave them both a swift right hook to the arm.

March had a grin from ear to ear on his face and came to put his arm around my shoulders.

"Look how easy that was, Sak! You made it all the way up the 'big ass hill' in no time." Cheshire's snickers were not lost as I looked at the door to the house that was on top of the hill in front of me. That run should have taken a lot longer and I knew I shouldn't have been able to catch up with them that quick; they had been too far ahead.

This place was just getting weirder and weirder by the minute.

March knocked on the door nicely. If that is the word you can use for it. After about thirty-seconds of no answers from whoever was supposed to live in the house, March began to knock obnoxiously. To give the person credit, I would have chucked something sharp out the top window hoping it hit the dumbass who was at my door.

The door was pulled open in a quick motion revealing the person who lived at the house. They too were dressed strangely compared to myself, but it almost seemed to really work for them. Wearing a dark navy blazer, with a dark maroon button up underneath, and dark navy cargo shorts, this person did not look half as insane as the other two.

Dark eyes that looked red in the heat of the moment bore daggers into March who grinned sheepishly and then pushed his way into the house.

"Listen, Teme," March began as he strutted to the kitchen. "If you had just answered the door the first time I had knocked we wouldn't be having this problem. So why don't you get that stick that is up your ass out and show some hospitality to our new friend we brought with us."

As if noticing me for the first time, the man turned his dagger eyes to me. I could only just stare back because he two resembled someone that I knew from back home. That is when I noticed the door closing in my face.

"Oi, Teme! Don't shut the door!" March called from the kitchen where Cheshire had joined him to raid the food that seemed to be in the fridge and pantries. Though he had yelled to his friend not to shut the door, a click was heard as the door latched back into place and I stood outside by myself staring back at it.

It took a moment for it to register. I got pissed. He thought March was obnoxious when he banged on the door for him to open it, this guy was in for a whole other thing.

I banged on the door. The man opened the door quicker this time to probably not relive the earlier banging that had happened.

"What do you want?" I just stared dumbfounded at his monotone expression and voice as if he believed I was some bug that had just found his way to his door step.

"What do I want? I want to go home. I want to find out how the hell I got here. I want to know, Mr. All-High-and-Mighty, gives you the right to shut the door in my face when I have no idea who you are," I seethed through clench teeth. He still just stood there staring with that same dagger expression on his face. March jumped in behind him with a sandwich in hand.

"This," he pointed to the man he was standing behind. "Is the Mad Hatter. Hatter for short. He was the one we were coming to visit. Sorry he is so rude. Come on in, Sakura-chan." He grabbed my arm from behind the Hatter and dragged me through the door pushing past the Hatter in the process. Hatter glared daggers at his friend, but shut the door behind us anyways.

I stood in awe of the house. It seemed big on the outside and that is exactly what it was. Big. There were hats in one room off to the side, a kitchen area, dining room, something that looked like the offset of a living room, and other rooms that I could not see into very well. The colors seemed to match and not match at the same time.

"Wow," I breathed.

"Yeah, his house is alright." Cheshire remarked, as he too shoved food into his mouth. The house was more than alright…It was unbelievable.

"Not that I care for your companion," Hatter started glaring daggers again at the two boys, his dark eyes looking redder by the minute, "But why the hell are you here?"

I looked at my two companions as well. Why were we here? Could they not have just helped me to get back home? Were they as lost as me?

"Well, dear friend, who creates the best hats in all the land, we need your help. Actually, we need everyone's help. Your house was the first stop."

The Hatter looked at him quizzically as his eyes began to show the dark onyx color of his eyes. They were some beautiful eyes too. He waited for the March Hare to continue. It was like he paused for effect on everything.

"The Red Queen has made her entrance into our part of the world."