Author's Note: I am terribly sorry. After I wrote the first chapter, I thought, "Hey! What if I just updated this every Tuesday? It would make sense!" But I just…didn't. My apologies, dear readers, if you actually wanted to read more of this sooner. Anyway, here is the next chapter. :D

Disclaimer: I don't own Victorious. If I did, would play the piano on Andre's locker all the time. At least, the few songs that I know. :D

Tuesdays with Lane (Week Two)

"Now, children. How many times do I have to keep telling you? No consumables in my acting sanctum!" Mr. Sikowitz yelled.

"But it's just gum!" Robbie protested, "All of the other teachers let us have gum!"

"Well they shouldn't. It's a school rule that you can't have food or drink in classrooms, Sandberg."

"Gum isn't necessarily a food!" Tori argued, "You don't eat it."

"Well then what is it?" Everyone in the room paused to think.

"A type of confection traditionally made of chicle, a natural latex product, or synthetic rubber known as polyisobutylene." I piped up. Everybody look at me as if I had two heads, "I like the pink kind the best!" I smiled.

"How did you know that?" Andre asked, surprised.

"My PearPad! I also downloaded a dancing bunny graphic!" I held it up for everyone to see.

"That's wonderful, Cat. Now just spit it out, Robbie." Mr. Sikowitz sighed, dropping the subject. Robbie walked over to the trashcan, threw his gum out, and then slumped in his chair. The bell rang as soon as he sat down.

"Yay! Lunch!" I cried, jumping up from my seat.

"Wait!" Mr. Sikowitz shouted, flinging his arms out in objection.

"What?" all of the students groaned, evidently famished.

"Before you go, everyone must line up beside the door and leave one by one, posing like a character that I will choose for you."

"Why?" Rex questioned.

"Because I am your sensei and you are tiny fledgling actors, and therefore you must follow my commands."

"This is stupid." Jade muttered before exiting the room. Beck watched her leave, eyebrows raised, but didn't make an attempt to follow her.

"Jade, you are no fun!" Mr. Sikowitz called out after her as everyone began to line up. I was third, which was cool because three is my favorite number. Beck was first.

"Beck! You are a turtle with a sinus infection. Pose!" Beck got on his hands and knees and put a sad look on his face, wrinkling his nose.

"Scrumdidlyumptious!" Mr. Sikowitz praised. Beck stood up, "Wait! No!"

"What?"

"Now you have to crawl to lunch." Beck shrugged before returning to his previous position and crawling out the door.

"Ah! Tori is up. You are a cowgirl who thinks she is made of boysenberry yogurt. Pose!" Tori spread her legs as if there was a horse under her and licked her arm, "Now go catch up to Beck and ride him until he makes it to lunch. Move!" She shot Mr. Sikowitz a weird look before sprinting out the door.

"Nutterrific! Cat! You're next!" I squealed and clapped my hands. But before Mr. Sikowitz could assign me a character, we heard Jade shouting down the hall.

"Vega! What are you doing on my boyfriend?"

"Mr. Sikowitz told me to do this!" Tori explained nervously.

"And if Sikowitz told you to dunk your head in a vat of boiling gravy, would you?" Jade interrogated.

"Umm…no."

"Well you should anyway." Then we heard a loud thud and a pained cry from Tori, "Beck, take me to lunch."

"That wasn't very nice…" Beck commented.

"You know I'm not nice. Now move it! I need a burrito." She commanded. I could imagine her stomping toward lunch with Beck in tow, cursing under her breath as she went.

"I knew that would happen." Mr. Sikowitz disclosed, laughing, "Now Cat! Pose like a magician with an amputated leg!" I stood on one foot and took off my hat, holding it out and pretending to pull a rabbit out of it, "Fantabulous! Now hop on one foot to lunch!" I jumped out of the room and made my way down the hall. I noticed Tori writhing on the floor and I stopped to help her up.

"Aww Tori! Why are you on the ground?" I inquired, concerned.

"Because Jade is a gank!" she grumbled, struggling to stand.

"Oh. What day is it?" I was curious as to what the special was for lunch.

"Taco Tuesday! Time to get my fiesta food on!" she answered cheerfully.

"Oh no! Lane!" I gasped, letting go of Tori's hand and letting her fall back down to the floor, leaping hurriedly to the counselor and hoping that I wouldn't be late.

"That's fine, Cat!" Tori shouted after me, "I love it here on the cold hard ground!"

"Kay kay!"

"I was being sarcastic!"

"Kay kay!" I continued hopping until I arrived at Lane's just in time.

"Hello Cat! I'm glad that you remembered." Lane greeted as I walked in.

"Yeah. I've got a great memory. Like an elephant!"

"Right."

"Are you calling me fat?" I gasped, shocked at his insult.

"No! I'm just saying you have a good memory."

"Oh,"

"So why don't you sit down and tell me about your week?" Lane gestured toward the couch and I sat on it.

"Hey! Do you wanna hear a joke?" I asked.

"I'd rather listen to what's been going on with you…"

"But it's really funny!" I protested.

"Fine" Lane sighed.

"Yay! Okay, so what does a group of vegetarians say when it wants to enter your house?"

"I have no idea."

"Lettuce in!" I giggled.

"Very nice, Cat. Now why don't you tell me about…"

"What's your favorite tooth?" I interrupted.

"What?"

"Mine are my bottom incisors. They're so cute!" I gushed.

"I've…never thought about which teeth are my favorites."

"I have a loose tooth. It's a molar. See?" I opened my mouth wide and pointed to it.

"Cat. How old are you? Seventeen? Aren't you done losing teeth?"

"It's been loose for a few years. But I don't want it to come out. It's my last one! Then the tooth fairy won't come to my house anymore!" I pouted.

"And the dentist hasn't pulled it?" he interrogated incredulously.

"My family has been banned from all dental care facilities in California."

"What? Why?"

"My mother tried to bring my brother to the dentist for the first time and he had a fit. He broke the special chair, slobbered all over the oral hygienist, kept poking the secretary, and stabbed the dentist in the leg with the dental hook."

"Wow…umm…that's surprising."

"Not really. My brother said he would do that. My mother didn't believe him."

"I guess she should have."

"Yeah."

"So why don't you tell me about…"

"Do you like Spongebob?"

"My kids watch it…"

"I love Gary. He's so funny."

"All he does is meow."

"My brother meows when he's in the shower."

"That's…interesting."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

" It's just that…I don't think normal people meow in the shower."

"You're so mean! All my brother wants is to be accepted, but people like you ruin it!"

"I'm sorry! I accept your brother. But my brother never meows, so I wasn't expecting yours to do so."

"You have a brother, too? You can bring him to my house after school. They can have a play date!" I grinned at my excellent idea.

"My brother is thirty."

"So? My father is fifty!"

"So…Never mind. We're out of time. How about I see you next week?"

"Kay kay! See you then!"

"Bye!"

"Wait…what did you write this time?"

"Nothing important…" Lane told me nervously.

"Then let me see!" I snatched his paper away from him and scanned it over, "What do you mean by, 'See Therapist'?"

"Nothing! Just don't worry about it. Okay?"

"Alright."

"Now run off to lunch. Have a taco. I'll see you on Tuesday." He said, rubbing some lotion on his hands.

"Kay. Bye!" I waved as I walked out of the room. I saw Sinjin on the way to the Asphalt Café, "Hey!" I greeted him.

"Hi Cat!" he waved awkwardly.

"Did you order those mood socks from Sky Store?"

"Yeah!" He lifted his pant leg, showing off his currently red socks.

"What mood does red mean?"

"Aroused…" Sinjin winked suggestively.

"Bye Sinjin!" I briskly walked away.

"Well, at least she didn't slap me. Stupid Jade," I heard him mutter behind me.

Author's Note: Okay, I don't know about this one. What'd you guys think? Tell me in reviews. :D