Albert Calavicci
1. Sometimes the best time is the present… or the past… or the future…?
2. Ziggy is a complete nozzle and deserves to be thrown off some form of high building
3. Never trust a girl name Tina… or Sharon… or Maxine… or… oh what's her name again… eh I forget
4. Don't get married five times… or six…?
5. After getting married five or six times, remember to include the ring in the divorce settlement- you learn from your mistakes and plus rings cost a fortune these days
6. I don't blame my mum for leaving, but I don't forgive her either
7. Never sing Valore in your sleep
8. Always wear your heart on your sleeve… unless you're not wearing sleeves, then go for your life!
9. And no, SEX is not all I think about… I also think about… about… yeah I got nothing
10. I probably should have been a runner; it may have come in handy at one point
11. I am waaay to trustworthy- so I make an effort to not be sometimes
12. Toasters hurt, especially when they're thrown at you from across the room
13. I admit, sometimes I can be a little stupid
14. Yeah one of my favourite jackets does have a large STOP sign on the back and arms, your point?
15. Judges can be very unreasonable, especially when dealing with dogs… oh and the animal ones too
16. If I could go back to change some of my past events I would, but where would I start?
17. Vending machines can also be very unreasonable
18. Alcohol doesn't solve everything
19. Oh my god, with that last comment I've suddenly realised I'm slowly turning into Sam!
20. Waiting around for ages gives you a lot of time to think about things… like sex
21. You really can't get off on a technicality
22. Okay yeah that weasel song is difficult to learn!
23. VOLAREEE! OHH OHHH!
24. When life gives you lemons, throw them back and demand cigars!
25. Samuel Beckett was and still is my best buddy- and I miss him greatly