Hello everyone! I wanted to get this somewhat angsty one out before Wednesday, which I can probably speak on behalf of all us by saying I am so so very excited. Anyways this one is set after the 'cool off' (2x16), but before Erin's dark days.

P.S. This chapter is rated M. Also this turned out slightly shorter than I'd like to be but nontheless, hope you all enjoy! :)

Neither of them truly remember how they got to this point, the point where they both had failed to resist the temptation of the each other after 'cooling off.' Somehow within a few glasses of liquor and a few lonely texts sent back and forth they found themselves together in his apartment. Relapsing. While straddling his hips, feverish kisses were placed from Erin's neck down to her cleavage as he unhooked her lace bra tossing it aside the bed where the rest of their discarded clothes lay. The touch of Jay's hands running down her bare back sent chills down her spine. She really missed this, not just sex; but being with him. Feeling the scratchiness of his scruff on against her skin and the taste of his lips on hers had her questioning why she ever agreed to stop seeing each other in the first place. Erin wasted no time, she needed him, and she needed him now. She pulled off her remaining clothing, reaching for his as well. Jay responded without objection, pinning her wrists above her head, taking control grinding his hips against hers. In combination of sucking at her neck while hitting in that right spot send Erin in a craze of euphoria. The loud moans escaping their mouths drowned any logic in their actions. All that was left was the two of them feeling more whole than they've felt in a while.

The aroma of freshly brewed black coffee filled the break room the next morning, as Jay poured himself a cup. He wasn't sure what to expect exactly, they hadn't said much in the earlier that morning, as they awkwardly shuffled away from each other avoiding conversation, especially any serious kind. 'What were they?' This was a question that was never really truly answered, not until they were labeled as just partners after putting the brakes on their developing relationship.

Erin entered the room, grabbing a cup standing beside him as he poured her the steaming drink into it.

"So last night..." She started.

"Yeah, we probably shouldn't make that a habit, huh?" He replied.

She turned her body toward him, after looking over her shoulder checking to see if anyone was watching or listening. "I don't know, Jay, maybe we made a mistake calling us off." She waited for a response, but the curious look in his eyes showed otherwise. "Maybe we should just go back to the way things were. We can just be more careful this time around."

"Erin-" The tone in his voice caused her heart to sink.

"No, don't 'Erin' me, didn't you feel it? Last night, you and me, It felt like everything was so clear, it felt like my universe was snapped back into focus. Didn't you feel it?" It sounded more like a plea than she wanted it to.

"Of course I did." he answered back with certainty, "I want to be with you." A smile formed in the corners of her lips. "but I don't want to sneak around, I don't want to play games, not anymore."

"Voight made his views pretty clear, if we don't sneak around, our jobs are at stake." Erin challenged.

"So what?" He brushed off. "If we're worth it, then none of that matters."

And with that he was off, leaving Erin dazed with bewilderment.

'Why did he have to make it so hard?' She wondered driving through the crowded streets. Antonio sat beside her as they drove behind the rest of the team heading to raid a den where drugs and guns were trafficked through.

Upon arriving to their destination, Voight called out instruction. And off they went, Atwater broke down the door, and the call of "Chicago PD!" rang out repeatedly.

The thunderous bang of gunshots sliced through the air. Each took cover retaliating with shots of their own. All was routine, until out of the corner of her eye she watched him fall to the ground, hard. Suddenly the shots weren't so loud, all she could hear was a distant ringing in her ears as time moved extraordinarily slow.

She didn't care if she had cover or not, determined to get to him, she ran across the crossfire. She took deep breath before examining him, no evident sign of blood, as she looked closer she found that gold colored bullet nestled into the black fibers of his bulletproof vest.

"You're fine. The vest caught it. You're fine, you're fine." She repeated beyond relieved, processing it, trying to control her breathing back down to normal.

"Jay?" She called out into the locker room. Shortly after, she found him examining his large bruise left by the hit.

Her heart started to settle, "I need to talk to you."

He responded by raising his eyebrows letting her know he was all ears.

"You know when you have a near-death experience you see your whole life flash before you?"

He nodded trying to follow where she going.

"When you went down, that's what happened to me."

"Wow, I almost get shot, and you're thinking about your life, a little selfish, no?" Jay asked, sarcasm overfilling his tone.

"Shut up." She said, punching his shoulder opposite to this wound. "That's not the point, I'm trying to say you were right."

They stood in the same room where she rested her cheek against his hand, with a bitter goodbye. This felt like a fateful, beautiful beginning.

"Nothing else matters, I just want to be with you; completely. We're worth the fight." She expressed sure of every word.

Ecstatic he pulled her closer meeting his lips with hers, smiling into the kiss.