Author's Note: Ok, this chapter has some Japanese sentences in it, and since I'm not a native speaker of Japanese, I'm probably going to botch some of the words and grammar (I used Google Translate for most of these). If you see any mistakes, kindly just leave a review or PM me, and I'll go back to fix them later. Otherwise, enjoy!
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Chapter 2
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When I came to, the first thing I noticed was that I was wearing clothes. Huh. Somehow I'd forgotten about my nakedness in the whirl of confusion and terror when I was first...born.
It sounded impossible, but right now, it was my best explanation for what was happening to me. Somehow, I had been born twice. The first time, I was human. The second time...I'm not even sure what I am. "Alien" didn't seem like the right term anymore.
The strangest thing about my experience, however, was that I could remember snippets of my past life. Sure, I had no idea who I once was, or even who my family was, but I knew with an almost chilling, cold certainty that this was not the first time I'd been born. Even if reincarnation was real, I was positive the subjects weren't supposed to know about their past lives.
And then there was the fact that I could sense the people here. My memory may be spotty, but I'm certain I did not have this ability in my first life. The alien explanation was starting to look good again...
Speaking of my weird sensing ability, I suddenly noticed an extra presence in the room. The fuzzy blue image this one portrayed was much smaller than that of either of my parents (it still felt so weird to think of them that way) and as it moved closer to me, I caught a whiff of sweet cedar and water.
Almost instinctively, I knew my unexpected visitor was male, and a very young one at that.
At long last, the presence moved to a stop right in front of my bed. For a while, he just stood there, staring at me I assume. And let me tell you, there is nothing more awkward than pretending to sleep while remaining fully aware that someone was watching you.
Finally, I couldn't take it anymore and snapped my eyes open. Once again, nothing changed. My heart sank. A part of me had hoped that the first time was a fluke, that when I opened my eyes, something other than darkness would greet my vision. But the second time confirmed it. Either the people here turned the lights off all the time, or I was blind.
As I mentally angst-ed over this newfound development, my little visitor seemed to have been caught completely by surprise. With a loud gasp, he tumbled to the floor (if the ensuing thump was anything to go by). Looks like he'd climbed up to see me, and accidentally let go when I opened my eyes.
Despite the news I'd recently confirmed for myself, I couldn't help but snort. Instantly, the boy's presence appeared at the side of my bed again, his image flickering happily. "Anata ga waratta!" He exclaimed. Yeah, I have no idea what you just said. What language do they speak here, anyway?
Without waiting for a reply, he went on: "Watashi no namae wa Shisui des!"
I still have no idea what you're talking about, I thought dully. Although the language did sound vaguely familiar, as if I'd heard it somewhere before. But where? Definitely in my past life. However, that would nullify the alien theory. Perhaps I was still in my old world after all?
Just then, another presence entered the room. I recognized it immediately—the ashy scent, mixed with the smell of fresh water—along with the characteristic vibrations in his image. It was my father.
And apparently, somebody was in trouble. My first visitor's image began to buzz nervously, and I didn't even have to see to know that the boy made a brave but futile attempt at escape.
"Anata wa koko de nani wo shiteiru no desu ka?" my father asked the boy. His voice sounded stern.
"Aisatsu shitakatta dakena nda!" the boy whined. Gah, it's so frustrating not being able to understand anything!
My father seemed to sigh, his image wavering with what could only be described as exasperation. Then, to my surprise, he lifted the boy up, bringing him over to the side of my bed to look at me.
As the boy laughed, I was struck with a realization. These people were my family. And the boy...the boy was my brother. I wasn't sure how I knew; it was almost instinctive, the same way I knew the gender and age of my brother when he'd first come to visit. And it seemed the more time passed, the more information I could glean from each reading.
"Watashi wa anata no oniisanda, Kagami-chan!" my brother said. I still couldn't understand him, but I could tell his affection and excitement for me were heartfelt. Before I could even think about it, I smiled, gurgling happily.
I didn't need to see to know that my brother smiled back.
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After that first meeting, my brother visited a couple more times. Each visit, he seemed to have something to say, enthusiastically blabbering away in that childish voice of his. But it was a good thing for me, as it allowed me to pick up the language faster (it probably helped that with little else to do as a baby, my only source of entertainment came through reviewing the one-sided conversations we had).
As a result, the day when my mother and I would finally be able to go home came as no surprise to me. I wasn't sure how long we'd stayed in the hospital, but apparently it was longer than usual. Evidently, my birth had not been an easy one.
When I thought back to the first time I'd met my parents, and remembered the overwhelming scent of my mother's blood, I could understand why. And I couldn't help feeling the tiniest bit guilty for that.
But she was better now, my brother had assured me on his last visit. And soon both she and I would be able to come home.
To tell the truth, I was excited to be going "home." I was still unsure whether my alien theory was completely false, but one thing was certain: my family here genuinely loved me. My brother seemed to see me as the center of his world, and each time my mother breastfed me, I could tangibly feel the love and tenderness emanating off her in waves.
As for my father, he acted like he was unsure of how to treat me, but I could sense his love and devotion every time he visited. Still, there was some small part of me that was hurt with how open he seemed to be around my brother and how tight-lipped he was around me. While both my mother and brother spoke to me all the time, he never did.
I tried not to be too bothered by that. Maybe he was just shy around babies.
But anyway, today I was finally going home! I was curious to see, I mean sense, more of the outside world. Although my sensing abilities had improved since that first day, and I could now tell exactly where my mother was even if we weren't in the same room, I couldn't perceive much outside of the hospital. Perhaps by getting a feel of what the outdoors looked like, I would be able to work out exactly where I was on...Earth. Unbidden, the word came to mind. Was that the place I'd lived in before I had been born again?
Speaking of my memories, or lack of them, thoughts and places would randomly float to the front of my brain, dragged up from who knows where. Sometimes all it would take was a familiar word for me to suddenly remember something. But I couldn't remember. Who. I. Was.
It frustrated me to no end. I mean, your identity is a pretty big part of who you are. Here, I had a new identity, Kagami (a conclusion reached after weeks of careful conversation and sensory analysis). It was a nice name, I suppose. A little strange sounding. But most of the words here were like that.
What was really strange, however, was my brother's name: Shisui. It was just as weird as the rest of the words here, yet somehow, I felt like I'd heard it before. In my past life.
This world felt so different from my old life, yet these odd connections kept popping up everywhere. Trying to figure them out gave my physically underdeveloped mind a headache. So I decided not to think too much about them, at least for the moment.
I was drawn out of my thoughts by my mother's entering the room. She seemed much healthier than the first time I'd met her, and the smell of blood had given way to something that could only be described as ash and lilies (I know, a weird combination, but at least it was very easy to recognize). Her image buzzed with happiness as she gathered me up in her arms.
"Aren't you excited, Kagami-chan? Today we finally get to go home!" she chirped.
I gurgled approvingly. Regrettably, I could make no other noise.
My mother seemed to take this as an affirmative on my part, and settling me more comfortably into her arms, we left my hospital room.
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My head hurt. No, scratch that. My head pounded, like a thousand gunmen were firing off shots, one after the other, inside my brain. Because unfortunately for me, I had forgotten one important detail about the outside world.
There were people outside. A whole lot more than there were in the hospital. And all of those blue images were making my head ache.
For my parents' sake, I attempted to disguise my pain as best as I could, but Shisui (who seemed unusually perceptive for a four year old) appeared to catch on to my discomfort. Instead of showing me the sights and sounds like he'd promised, he suddenly seemed extra anxious to get home, which in turn made my parents want to get home, and as a result we reached our house in record time.
Actually, calling it a house would be derogatory. It was more like a small village in and of itself, with a lot of ash-smelling people milling around inside. Now I know where my parents got their smell from.
Thankfully, there were less people here than in the main village, and my headache seemed to ease ever so slightly. Still, I was amazed. Were all these people my relatives? I didn't realize I had such a...large family. Suddenly, I was feeling the slightest bit intimidated.
As we walked through the entrance, some of them seemed to stop and notice us. A few even came up to exchange greetings with my father. With a jolt of respect, I realized he must be an important person in our family. (Which did nothing to ease my nerves, by the way. I was probably expected to one day be just as good as he was).
Strangely enough, my mother suddenly altered the way she was holding me so that my face was turned towards her chest. As one of our relatives approached us, her image spiked nervously. But what would she have to be nervous about?
"Ohayo, Kimiyo-san!" our relative said cheerfully. "I'm so glad to see you're back from the hospital. Ooh, is this the baby? What's her name?"
When she leaned closer to peer at me, my mother shifted, almost hiding me from view. "Her name is Kagami," my mother said quickly. "She's a little tired from our trip here, so she's sleeping."
Err...no I wasn't.
But our relative didn't seem to know that. Her image fluctuated with disappointment, but she turned away, tossing a good-bye over her shoulder as she went.
I could physically feel my mother relax beneath me.
Ok...that was weird. Why was my own mother acting as if she didn't want our relatives to see me?
I hardly had any time to dwell on my question, however, before we were suddenly moving again, my mother still noticeably keeping my face turned away from the outside. Although I hated to admit it, I was a little tired from the day's events. Needless to say, this was the most activity I'd had in a while, even if I wasn't the one doing the walking.
With a big yawn, I closed my eyes, drifting off to a peaceful sleep.
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Author's Note: It's actually harder than I thought to write from the point of view of a blind person. I keep wanting to write "see," and having to write something like "sense" or "felt" instead.
And yeah, I noticed that I keep ending these chapters with the main character falling asleep. But even though she claims her mind is mature, she does physically have the body of a baby. And babies sleep. A lot.
Translations:
Anata ga waratta! - You laughed!
Watashi no namae wa Shisui des! - My name is Shisui!
Anata wa koko de nani wo shiteiru no desu ka? - What are you doing here?
Aisatsu shitakatta dakena nda! - I just wanted to say hello!
Watashi wa anata no oniisanda, Kagami-chan! - I'm your big brother, Kagami!