APRIL FOOLS!

Charlie is a purple tank engine, who can often be seen shunting trucks in the various yards on the island. A comedian at heart, he likes to tell jokes to the other engines - with mixed results.

"Hey, James!" Charlie called, shunting some coaches behind the red engine, "What wobbles when it flies?"

James rolled his eyes.

"I don't know, and frankly, I don't care. Just hurry up and shunt my coaches."

"Oh, don't be like that! A laugh a day doesn't hurt anyone!" Charlie cleared his throat. "Anyway-" Before Charlie could finish, James reversed into the coaches, bashing Charlie in the process. With a short blast of his whistle, James rattled away with his train. Charlie scoffed.

"He wouldn't know good comedy if it hit him in the tender…"

One early morning, Charlie was taking a train of empty trucks up to the China Clay Works. He had never been there before and thus wanted to make a strong first impression. As he pulled in, he noticed Bill and Ben just outside the shed.

"Why, hello you two!" he exclaimed, "Have I got a joke for you-"

Bill and Ben hurriedly hushed him. Charlie felt rather insulted.

"Well, if you don't want a good joke that's on you, but-"

"Will you be quiet?" Bill cut in, "You'll ruin it!"

Charlie raised an eyebrow.

"Ruin… what?"

"You'll see," Ben snickered. The twins giggled mischievously, before sneaking a glance at Timothy, who was still snoring in the shed. Carefully, they backed down onto him. Charlie watched curiously.

"Ready, Ben?" whispered Bill.

"Ready, Bill."

Slowly and quietly, they pulled Timothy along until he was under the coal hopper. Bill grinned and blasted his whistle, waking Timothy up.

"Huh, what? I'm awake, I'm awake-" It was then that Timothy realized where he was. He looked up and gulped. "Uh oh."

Coal poured down all over Timothy, coating him in a cloud of coal dust. He coughed fiercely, though Bill and Ben weren't too sympathetic.

"April fools!" they laughed together. Charlie's laughter was even louder than theirs.

"That was brilliant! Comedy gold! Who knew such a mindless holiday would make for such great material? Thanks, you two! I'll take note of that!"

Charlie was quickly uncoupled from his trucks and he puffed away, still laughing. Bill and Ben glanced at each other.

Shortly after Charlie had left, Edward had been called to help clear up the mess. Needless to say, he wasn't pleased.

"Honestly, Bill and Ben, I am disappointed. I thought I made it abundantly clear that I didn't want any sort of pranks from you on April Fool's!"

"But Edward, it was funny!" Bill protested.

"Yeah, you'd agree if you had seen it," added Ben.

"I doubt Timothy would agree," Edward replied shortly, "Are you alright, Timothy?"

Timothy coughed and smiled weakly.

"Just a bit of dust on my paint, that's all."

Edward chuckled.

"That's a relief." He then glared at the twins. "In any case, I better not hear about any other pranks by you two, or I will speak to your manager about it. Understood?"

"Yes, Edward," they muttered dully.

"Good, and I hope you heed my words this time," Edward said sternly and he reversed away.

Meanwhile, Charlie had arrived back at the shunting yard, feeling quite invigorated. He already had several ideas for pranks racing through his mind.

"This is going to be a very fun day!" he thought. He noticed James taking on water and pulled alongside him.

"Ugh, there you are. What took you so long?"

"Just a simple run up to the Clay Pits, James, nothing of your concern. Unless you wanted to take the train for me…!"

Some nearby trucks giggled.

"There's no way I'd pull that rubbish," snapped James, "especially not when I'm pulling coaches next. Speaking of which, you'd better shunt them for me."

James whistled and started to leave. Charlie scoffed to himself as he went to get the coaches.

"Bossy buffers… He could use a good prank…"

He stopped and grinned as he came up with an idea.

"Oh, James! Wait!"

"What now?" James grumbled, braking to a halt, "I'm not going to be late just for one of your 'jokes.'"

"It's better than that! I just remembered that you were supposed to be picking up a special passenger on this train!" Charlie explained.

"A special passenger? I never heard about that… You're not pulling my wheels, are you?"

Charlie chuckled.

"Oh, James, when have I ever lied to you?"

James thought for a moment; for all of the cracks Charlie had spewed, he had been relatively honest.

"Hmm… I see. It does make sense, after all; a special passenger would only want a ride from a really splendid engine like me!"

Charlie rolled his eyes when he wasn't looking.

"Yes James, of course. Now run along, you wouldn't want to upset him!"

James hastily raced away to the platform, leaving Charlie to chuckle as he shunted the coaches.

As James arrived at the station, he scanned the platforms for his passenger.

"Who are you looking for, James?" Thomas asked as he pulled in with his branch line train.

James wasn't listening; his face lit up when he noticed a man in a blue uniform getting off of Thomas' train. He walked to the end of the platform and climbed down to the underpass under the line.

"Oh, that must be him!" James exclaimed excitedly. The man climbed up the stairs to James' platform.

"Good morning, sir! We'll get you to your destination in no time!" James called. The man stopped and stared at James in confusion.

"What?"

"Well… you're my special passenger, aren't you?"

The man chuckled.

"'Special passenger?' What nonsense! I'm here to fix the oven at M.C Bunn!"

James gaped, cheeks flushing bright red. Before he could say anything, Charlie pulled into the station.

"April fools!" he cried triumphantly. James was speechless! Thomas couldn't contain his laughter.

"To think a 'special passenger' to you is someone who fixes ovens! How your standards have dropped, James!"

James gritted his teeth furiously.

"I-It wouldn't be funny if something embarrassing happened to you!"

Thomas took no notice, but Charlie did. He snickered to himself as he quietly rolled away.

"I think it would…"

As soon as his passengers disembarked, Thomas made his way to the yard to drop off Annie and Clarabel, still chuckling.

"That wasn't funny, Thomas!" scolded Annie.

"Well, I thought it was," Thomas smirked, "You two just don't have a sense of humour."

Thomas shunted the spluttering coaches into a siding.

"I'll be back for you two later. I just need to take some trucks to the harbour."

Thomas whistled and hurried away to find his train. Annie and Clarabel sighed, not noticing a snickering Charlie pull up alongside them.

When Thomas came back from the harbour, however, he was shocked to discover that Annie and Clarabel had gone!

"W-What? Where did they go?!"

Thomas desperately began searching the yard, stopping when he noticed Stafford getting his battery charged.

"Stafford! Where did you put Annie and Clarabel?" he asked hastily. Stafford was startled and confused.

"What are you talking about-"

"Thomas, Thomas!"

Charlie raced alongside Thomas and Stafford, panting heavily.

"Oh, Thomas, thank goodness I found you!"

"Charlie? What's going on?" demanded Thomas, "Where's Annie and Clarabel?"

Charlie heaved a shaky sigh.

"I'm sorry, Thomas, but... they were taken away on Henry's goods train."

"W-What? Why?!"

"They had to be taken to the Steamworks for an overhaul; they won't be back for a long time..."

Thomas' face froze up in shock.

"B-But... what c-coaches will I use?"

Charlie glanced at a line of red coaches on a nearby siding.

"You could always use some of those," he suggested meekly.

Thomas, utterly devastated, reluctantly puffed over to the red coaches and took them to the station. Stafford watched him do so, even more confused than before.

"Weren't Annie and Clarabel just on that siding, Charlie?" Stafford looked around, realizing Charlie had disappeared. "Charlie?"

Thomas pulled into the platform with a dejected look. The passengers were surprised to see the red coaches instead of Annie and Clarabel but climbed aboard regardless. Just as the guard was about to blow the whistle, another whistle sounded out instead.

"What now, Charlie? A joke won't make me feel better…" Thomas mumbled.

Charlie puffed up beside Thomas and grinned.

"No, but I bet this will!"

Thomas gasped; behind Charlie were Annie and Clarabel!

"I-I thought-"

Annie rolled her eyes.

"You shouldn't believe everything you hear, Thomas. This cheeky engine hid us in a shed! Isn't that right, Clarabel?"

"That's right, Annie," shivered Clarabel, "I think I saw a spider in there!"

"April fools!" Charlie cried and he scurried away, laughing. Thomas scowled.

"We have to couple up Annie and Clarabel!"

"Sorry, Thomas," sighed his driver, "There isn't time. We've already run late enough as it is, thanks to that purple nuisance interrupting us."

Thomas, cheeks flushed with fury, puffed out of the station. James was coming the other way with a goods train - and gave a knowing look at Thomas.

Charlie managed to sneak back into the yard without anyone noticing.

"Where did you go, Charlie?" asked Stafford suspiciously.

Charlie smiled nervously.

"Well, you see Stafford, I... had to go to the station! Yes, that's it! Turns out the stationmaster has news for you!"

"News? For me? What are you on about?"

"He says Philip and I are doing well on our own here, so you're free to head over to Wellsworth and shunt there for a while!"

"W-What? I don't think my battery can make it over there, Charlie."

"You just filled up! Surely, your battery can hold out for a few measly miles, right?"

Stafford blushed.

"Well, er..."

"Go on, it's urgent!" Charlie persisted.

Stafford wanted to protest, but he simply sighed and rolled quietly away instead. Charlie snickered.

"This'll be the funniest one yet!"

It wasn't long before Stafford started to regret his decision. The farther he went, the more he could feel the energy in his battery dwindle.

"Oh dear, this wasn't such a good idea… I just hope I can make it there," he fretted.

Unfortunately for him, he didn't. As he headed into Crosby Tunnel, his battery finally ran out. Stafford groaned, his voice echoing in the walls of the tunnel.

"Oh, bother. I should have known this would happen…" Suddenly, he gasped. "What if someone comes down the line and crashes into me? They won't be able to see me in the tunnel!"

Seeing the urgency in the situation, Stafford's driver ran to find a telephone to call for help. This left Stafford alone with his thoughts, and he only became more nervous by the minute.

"What if Gordon comes through with the express? Or-"

Just then, a loud whistle echoed in the tunnel, and the sound of an engine puffing came closer and closer.

"Oh, no! Stop, stop!" Stafford shouted desperately.

"What? Get out of the way!" came a booming voice in the distance.

"I can't!"

The other engine's brakes locked on. With a groan, he managed to stop, just in time. The engine's lamp shone on Stafford's face, revealing himself to be Gordon. He blinked and glared disapprovingly down at Stafford.

"You silly little shunter! You could've caused a severe accident!"

"I-I know… I am sorry, Gordon. I was told to shunt over at Wellsworth, but erm…"

Gordon narrowed his eyes.

"Who told you that?"

"Well… Charlie did, of course. Who else would tell me?"

"How about someone with an ounce of authority? That stupid engine! He tricked you, I expect."

"T-Tricked me? Why would he…" A dawn of realization came over Stafford. "...oh."

Seeing how upset Stafford looked, Gordon couldn't remain cross at him for long.

"Come on," he said, buffering up to him, "I'll push you back to Knapford."

Stafford felt extremely silly the whole way back to the yard.

Word of Charlie's prank going awry soon spread, and it wasn't long before the engines decided to hold a meeting around the turntable.

"It's disgraceful!" fumed Gordon, "He has no awareness of how his actions impact others! He could've injured my passengers!"

"Now, Gordon, you must realize it was not out of malicious intent. He just has... a different sense of humour," commented Edward cautiously.

"That's not an excuse, Edward," put in Henry, "He's gone after three vulnerable targets already." Thomas, James, and Stafford shared shamefaced looks. "It's only a matter of time before he gets even worse!"

"Aye, we've got tae stop him now," agreed Douglas, "We cannae just let him get awa' wi' this."

"Och, I say we bash the wee lad's buffers in!" exclaimed Donald angrily, "That'll show him nae tae mess wi' us!"

The engines liked this idea and started whistling in agreement. Edward, horrified, rolled onto the turntable and blew his own whistle until everyone else was silent.

"That is out of the question! We can't simply resort to violent means - it'll only make us even worse. Charlie hasn't laid a buffer on any of us!"

James snorted.

"Oh, what, because you've got a better idea?"

Edward thought for a moment before chuckling.

"I think I do, James. But while I'm gone, promise me you won't do anything rash," he said, looking particularly at Donald and Douglas.

"If ye insist, laddie," conceded Donald.

"Good." Edward puffed away on a clear track, sighing to himself.

"I miss when Charlie's humour only consisted of bad puns…" he mumbled.

Meanwhile, Bill and Ben were grumpily shunting trucks around the China Clay Works. Under the watchful eye of the other engines, they couldn't pull any tricks, and the twins were growing restless.

"It's not fair. What did we do to deserve this?" groaned Ben.

"You wasted a whole load of coal on a silly prank for one thing," said a stern voice. Bill and Ben gulped as Edward pulled in, looking serious.

"W-We're sorry, Edward, honest!"

"It was Ben's idea, anyway!"

"Y-Yeah! Wait, no!"

"Now, now, you're not in trouble," Edward chuckled, "It's just that I have something to ask of you."

Bill raised an eyebrow.

"You? Ask something of us?"

"What, is it to behave?" Ben said sarcastically.

"For once, no. I… need you to pull a prank on Charlie."

The twins were most surprised!

"Charlie?" Bill pondered, "Isn't he that purple engine who came up with those trucks this morning?"

"Yes, that's him."

"But I thought you said we weren't allowed to pull any more pranks today," said Ben smugly.

"I know, I know," Edward sighed, "but Charlie's been even worse. While you've been here, Charlie's been pulling all sorts of pranks on the other engines. He's too caught up in himself to listen to advice."

Bill and Ben looked at each other, each remembering what Charlie had said that morning.

"Thanks, you two! I'll take note of that!"

Bill gritted his teeth.

"How dare he! He stole our idea!"

"Don't you worry, Edward," Ben smirked, "We'll put that bloke in his place and show him who the real pranksters are."

With that, Bill and Ben hurried out of the clay pits, giggling maniacally. Timothy noticed the two leaving and grew worried.

"Edward, are you sure you should have done that?"

Edward chuckled.

"It depends on what they do, I suppose…!"

By the time Bill and Ben arrived at the shunting yard, they had formulated a plan. They scanned the sidings for two particular trucks, and at last, found them - an old tar tanker and a chicken wagon that the workmen hadn't bothered to clean out.

"Perfect," Ben giggled. He was coupled up to the trucks and moved them to where their victim wouldn't see them.

"Now, where's Charlie?"

They soon got their answer - Charlie was talking to some trucks he was shunting.

"I heard he almost had a collision with Gordon! A shame I couldn't see it for myself, but I couldn't just leave the yard without arousing suspicion. You know how it is, don't you?"

The trucks yawned disinterestedly.

"Anyway, I tell you, today's been incredible! I'm making new boundaries in comedy!"

"Don't you have any jokes to tell us, Charlie?" a truck interjected hopefully.

"Pah, who needs those anymore? At least for today, though I'm not sure if I even want to be restrained by that. I'm sure everyone will love the new routine regardless!"

The trucks groaned in disappointment, though Charlie didn't seem to notice.

"How oblivious can someone be?" Bill wondered aloud.

"Ssh," hissed Ben, He trudged forward, Bill doing the same.

"Why, if it isn't the talk of the railway himself!" smirked Ben, "I say, Bill and I are very impressed with what you've done today."

Charlie was surprised - he had never expected the twins to praise him.

"Really?"

"Of course!" added Bill, "Your jokes are better than ours any day!"

As the twins had hoped, Charlie became conceited once he heard this.

"Heh, I mean, I am the island's resident comedian after all," Charlie smirked, "I know a thing or two about what makes it tick."

"Oh, please teach us to be like you, Charlie!" pleaded Bill.

Charlie pretended to be deep in thought about his decision to keep Bill and Ben in suspense, but really he was improvising another prank.

"Alright, if you two promise to do exactly as I say," Charlie said at last.

"Yes, of course!" the twins exclaimed together.

"Now, we'll have to head around to someplace more isolated. We can't have just anyone knowing my secrets, now can we? How about you two go first?"

Bill and Ben winked at each other when Charlie wasn't looking.

"Actually, Charlie, why don't you go first?" Ben suggested, "Only the best of jokers should."

"Hmm… I can't argue with that! Follow me!" Charlie whistled and started puffing down the line. Bill and Ben followed, seeing that Charlie was picking up speed.

"This is working out even better than I had hoped!" whispered Bill.

Charlie didn't see that the tar tanker and chicken wagon were in his way behind him! He crashed straight into the trucks, causing hot tar and chicken feathers to fly into the air before falling back down all over him. Charlie spat some feathers out his mouth and coughed.

"W-What? What happened?" he exclaimed, more stunned by the accident than hurt.

"You crashed, what do you think happened?" Bill grinned, stifling laughter.

Charlie gaped.

"You did that on purpose! You didn't want to know my secrets after all!"

"Of course we wouldn't. They clearly don't have much use," Ben snickered.

Charlie growled, trudging forward towards the twins.

"I'll pay you back, you know!"

"Come and get us then!" taunted Ben.

With a cheeky whistle, the twins hurried away. Charlie gritted his teeth furiously.

"You get back here!" he shouted and he gave chase. Charlie was so keen on paying Bill and Ben out that he didn't realize where he was going, nor did he notice that one of the twins had gone. Bill had braked on the line ahead, and Charlie stopped.

"Ha! I caught you!" Charlie proclaimed, but Bill merely snickered. "What?"

Then, Charlie looked around, and his face paled - he was right in the middle of Knapford Station! To his horror, other engines were crowding the platforms with waiting trains, quickly taking notice of the peculiar scene.

"I-I've got to get out of here!" Charlie cried and tried reversing, but Ben puffed up behind him and blocked his way. With nowhere to hide, the tar-and-feathered Charlie was put up on display for everyone to see. Laughter quickly filled the station, including Bill and Ben's.

"April fools!" the twins grinned. Charlie was speechless! A loud whistle blew and an annoyed Henry pulled up behind Ben with a stopping train.

"Bill, Ben, Charlie, get out of the way! Passengers can't hop onto the ballast, you know!"

Reluctantly, Bill started puffing into the junction so as to switch lines. Charlie seized his opportunity and raced away, leaving the laughing engines behind.

Charlie didn't stop until he reached the washdown. The cleaners looked at each other, extremely confused. One opened his mouth to say something, but Charlie interrupted.

"Don't ask…"

Whilst Charlie was being cleaned, he could do nothing but brood over the trick Bill and Ben had played on him.

"Those two humiliated me in front of everyone! Now, that's not funny!"

Charlie cracked a smile as Thomas puffed past with Annie and Clarabel, not noticing their glares.

"See, my joke on Thomas was funny! I mean, he may have been cross, but…" He trailed off. "Oh. Is this how the others felt when I played pranks on them?"

"Why are you talking to yourself?" asked a cleaner, but Charlie paid little attention to him.

"No one else thought my pranks were funny except me, but that's not what comedy is all about!

Making sure all of the tar and feathers were off him, Charlie hurried away.

"What an odd engine," a cleaner murmured.

Charlie rushed down the Main Line, hoping to get back to the yard as soon as possible, but he saw a red signal up ahead and had to stop.

"Bother signals! They're such nuisances! ...hmm, actually, jokes about signals could be good for my next routine!" He sighed sadly. "If I have anyone to tell it to, that is…"

Donald rolled up alongside, purposefully avoiding looking at Charlie.

"Hey, um… Donald? I just wanted to say…"

"Pah. Ye ain't fooling me," snapped Donald. Before Charlie could reply, the signal changed to green and Donald puffed away, hissing steam at him. Charlie groaned.

Bill and Ben were on their way back to the Clay Pits, very pleased with themselves. Before they could head home, they had to stop at Wellsworth to take on water.

"Leave enough for me, Bill. You can't take the whole tank!"

"I mean, I could."

"You wouldn't dare!"

James cleared his throat from the other platform. Bill and Ben looked at him curiously.

"I never I thought I'd say this, but you two were absolutely brilliant. I only wish I'd thought of it myself."

"I suppose you aren't clever enough," Bill smirked. James scoffed and looked away.

"Settle down, you two. You've already had your fun today," called Edward. Ben chuckled.

"Did you see what we did to him, Edward? I'd say it'll take hours to clean him!"

He and Bill guffawed, but Edward was noticeably silent.

"What's the matter, Edward?" queried Bill, "You're not cross, are you?"

"You better not be. You told us to do it," snorted Ben.

"I'm not, but… all the same, I think I should go and see if Charlie's alright."

Edward headed off, leaving Bill and Ben quite surprised.

"I don't care what Edward says, I think today was one of the best April Fools Days we've ever had," said Ben proudly.

"We only pulled two pranks, though," Bill pointed out.

"They were both brilliant pranks!"

"So? Remember that time Gordon thought we were going to dip him in the sea?"

"That wasn't on April Fool's!"

"It may as well have been!"

Still bickering, the twins started triumphantly home.

That night, Charlie was in his shed, lonely and miserable. All of his attempts to apologize had failed, and no one was interested in talking to him. He was therefore surprised when he saw Edward pulling up to him.

"Are you alright, Charlie?" Edward asked. Charlie snorted bitterly.

"No one will even look at me because of how silly I've been, but yes Edward, I'm quite alright!"

"Sarcasm doesn't suit you, Charlie."

"I'm sorry," Charlie sighed, "It's just, I don't know what to do now. I just want to be friends with everyone again."

"Changing your behaviour is a good starting point, which means no more tricks like those you pulled today."

"Yes, Edward, I'll never do that again. I promise."

Edward smiled.

"I'm glad to hear it."

"I doubt everyone else will, though," huffed Charlie.

"They just need some time is all. I'm sure eventually they'll forgive you. In the meantime, I better head home. Goodnight, Charlie!"

Charlie smiled weakly.

"Goodnight, Edward."

With that, Edward puffed away, leaving Charlie on his own once again. He had a lot to think about.

Author's Note: So it seems once again that I've completely disappeared from this website for almost a whole year. I'm going to give a brief explanation for those who happen to care for the sake of it - after finishing Too Much to Handel, I made up plans for the order of future stories (hence the next few planned originally being at the bottom of the page) and everything was going pretty well. Then, things started falling apart. I lost motivation for a good few months and when I did get it back, I wasn't sure I wanted to even post my stories here anymore rather than just make them into Google Docs and share them that way. It had a lot of advantages, like it doesn't disappear after ninety days and it saves as you update so you don't lose a ton of progress if your internet cuts out. With that said, I wasn't entirely sure as I essentially started on here, so I've decided I'm going to post things on here still, but most of my pre-established plans won't really be used. This doesn't mean we're going back to the days where I shove in Hank and Thumper into some random scene, but I won't strictly be using CGI characters... probably.

About Nature vs. Nurture... It's probably on the way. I'm more than 3/4 done and it'd be a shame if I wasted what I have. I can't say when I'll actually be finishing it, but it's not dead yet.

So, with that said, where did this story come from then? I had this idea back in April and wanted to get it out by the end of the month but as always, plans fell through, but I did manage to get it done. As I sort of said previously, I wasn't sure if I wanted to post it here, but I feel like you guys deserve an update and something to tide you over so that's why I ultimately decided to publish it anyway. I'm not particularly happy with it, but then, I guess my perfectionism doesn't need to be satisfied all the time.

One more thing before I finally shut up: I do plan on rewriting or at least adjusting the previous three stories here as looking back... they could be a lot better, or at least Stanley's Branch Line and Too Much to Handel could. Unlike previous times, I think I'm gonna post the old versions as their own separate one-offs for the sake of those that somehow like those versions instead of deleting them entirely, but if you see that they turn out to be different one day, then yeah, that's why. To cap this off, I suppose I'm back, but I'm not going to be making any more promises as to what happens, so... hooray?