2. Cough Syrup
Life's too short to even care at all.
I'm losing my mind losing,
My mind losing control.
"You're coming over the minute you're sure your parents are asleep."
"Helga, I'm...not so sure that's a good idea." And the hesitancy in her voice was reminiscent of previous years. Back then she was admittedly scared of defying Helga's word, and though the feeling was no longer a common occurrence, experiencing it now was so familiar.
"C'mon, Pheebs. You know I hate talking about the mushy-lovey-dovey stuff, well, unless I'm alone in a corner alley, ranting with Brainy nearby..." Here she laughed at the running gag of her elementary school follies. Phoebe almost let herself smile. "But we should probably talk about what happened."
"Can't we do that over the phone?" Phoebe could feel her voice and resolve weakening. Helga would have her way, as per usual. And it honestly didn't bother her; Phoebe actually agreed that speaking in person would be the best way to clear the air. But Phoebe was nervous and horny and afraid that she would do something entirely stupid if she let herself in that situation again. Namely, being utterly alone with Helga.
"I will sneak through your windows if you don't wanna come over." Phoebe could almost see Helga shrugging through her phone. "We'll have to be quiet though, Pheebs. That would prohibit us from being vocal."
Phoebe almost choked on the water she was anxiously sipping. The innuendo, intended or not, was there. She stood up and promptly flipped the switch for her ceiling fan to turn on to the highest setting.
"Helga, we are going to get coffee tomorrow. Ten AM sharp, at the usual place we go to. We can talk about it then, okay? I just need some time to process." There, they could both have some time to actually process all of this. Phoebe squeezed her eyes shut, in mental protest of whatever convincing argument Helga would use to change their meeting time.
"Okay. Sweet dreams, I'll talk to you tomorrow." A click.
And Phoebe felt utterly relieved, and then a little shocked that Helga had let her own resolve fade so quickly. Had this been Helga's plan all along? To ensure that Phoebe would not avoid her at all costs for the rest of the weekend, but rather create a window of opportunity for them to discuss the tension that now existed between them? Could Helga have really though that far in the heat of the moment?
Following their heated kiss, Phoebe's phone had buzzed and it seemed her parents suddenly wanted her home after it was reported a house party got busted for underage drinking. Rather then informing her parents that it would make more sense for Phoebe to reside in the safety of Helga's house, she willingly walked the nine blocks home. It was a strangely perfect out, and Phoebe began to wonder if her parents' sudden excellent timing was a miracle of God, or if perhaps, her mother had a sixth sense.
Phoebe had more than enough to ponder for the night.
X X X X
"Phoebe! My favorite customer," The suave Italian man exclaimed. "The usual soy latte?"
"Hello, Frankie, hope you're having a wonderful morning! And an iced coffee with three creams and two sugars, please," Phoebe gave her best grin.
"For that angry blonde girl, yes? 6.82 is your total," He replied without punching the numbers into the register. As Phoebe was milling through her pocket book, letting change spill out until she could find the necessary amount of coins, Frankie leaned over.
"So, are you finally going to tell her?" His proximity to Phoebe would have normally bothered her, but Frankie was about as straight as a rainbow. His ten year old relationship with the cafe manager was proof of that.
"She already knows," Phoebe handed him the change politely. She willed her face to remain composed.
"Oh, sweetie! You have been holding out on me. Tell me everything. She isn't here yet, is she? Oh, the whole cafe knows when Helga is around. So tell me, I'll take my break early."
"Not much to say," Phoebe was still attempting to be neutral. She turned around to assure that there were no impatient customers waiting behind her. It was a slow morning.
"Don't worry about taking your break early, I still don't even know what really happened. One minute I was successfully suppressing myself, the next Helga is telling me how I feel."
"Must have felt like the Twilight Zone, eh?" Frankie almost wanted to laugh, but he held it together for the girl's sake. In his opinion, it was glaringly obvious that Phoebe Heyerdahl was absolutely in love with one Helga G Pataki. He had never seen any young teen look at their best friend quite like that. Their hugging and hand-holding wasn't lost on him either, but Frankie never mentioned these facets to Phoebe. He only acted as support for the girl, and did not feel that it would be right to meddle with his own thoughts.
"It was. Now, we're meeting to further discuss it," Phoebe sighed. "I guess I'll go grab our usual table before someone takes it." Frankie watched the girl saunter away, her usual overly polite demeanor non-existent. She seemed defeated, and Frankie felt his heart break for the other girl.
Helga acting out of character was becoming a more and more common occurrence. From the events leading up to the kiss, to the kiss itself, to the end of their phone call, Phoebe realized that Helga was not being her normal self. It was all too weird, but delightfully and terrifyingly weird. All the sorts of oddness that caused Phoebe's head to feel light with excitement. And maybe some fear, too.
Yet, it was all preparation for when Helga entered the shop, totally sans obnoxious-bursting-through-the-door, and without a word, grabbed Phoebe's wrist and iced coffee, and suddenly both girls were walking arm in arm along the quiet streets. Although it was ten in the morning, Phoebe figured most kids were trying to sleep off their hangovers.
"Park?" Helga asked, looking over at Phoebe for the first time. Phoebe wasn't sure how to answer, so she only nodded.
The sun was high in the sky. The weather was at a pleasant sixty-five degrees, and a breeze whispered in the air. Phoebe could feel herself falling in love all over again, stepping on the cracks of the hard concrete with the light skin of her arms touching Helga's. There was something carefree about Helga with her blonde tresses behind her, waving gently. It was a moment, that amidst the confusion, Phoebe reveled in.
It took all of the will Phoebe possessed to finally commence their inevitable conversation. Phoebe had finished her latte ten minutes ago, and she could hear Helga sucked at the air (and whatever liquid remained) beneath the plastic cup. Their arms were touching, and they were sitting on the hardwood of a park bench. Few people were around, save for some especially motivated joggers.
"How did you know?" Might as well begin with the hard questions, Phoebe figured.
"Pheebs, I have a sixth sense for this kinda stuff," Helga was bending her straw now, playing with it between her fingers. "I mean, remember when we used to talk about Arnold in code?"
"Ice cream," Phoebe supplied.
"Yeah, well, you knew who I was talking about. You always knew," Helga placed her straw back into the plastic cup. She turned to face Phoebe, her features surprisingly showing an expression not with the usual confidence and uncaring attitude, but with deep concern in her brow.
"Well, I guess it was the same for me," Helga put her hands on Phoebe's now. The touch was light and it was becoming increasingly harder for Phoebe to concentrate. "And I didn't mean to bring it up the way I did. But uhh, I guess you could say after a lot of thinking...I have moved on from ice cream and decided I sort of found the perfect dessert: cake."
"Metaphors aside, Helga, what are you really trying to say? I can't help but think I am rebound from your feelings with Arnold. Perhaps even an experiment you are willing to drop after you reaffirm your sexuality. I can't let you use me, not like that." Phoebe hated herself for torching this chance at being with Helga.
Even if it was some sort of petty experiment, Phoebe knew that with one look, Helga could probably convince her to go through with it. She absolutely would let Helga use her like that, and those kind of thoughts frightened Phoebe more than anything. So Phoebe deflected the best she could, and avoided eye contact. If she could just not look Helga in the eyes, Phoebe would be safe.
"I guess I'm saying I didn't want to stay with Arnold, if I thought there was a spark elsewhere. Emotions are always changing, Pheebs, just like people. I don't want to let my self miss out on something. Not even for a minute. That's how I live life, you of all people would probably know that."
Helga was talking with such conviction, that Phoebe almost let herself believe it. Almost.
"But I can't afford my heart being hurt that way! Not when we know it will be Arnold. Every time, you go back to him. You've broken up with him and gotten back together more times than Gerald and I have even gone on dates. It doesn't work this way, Helga." Phoebe was seething now, the truth of her words spilling into a leaden filling her chest.
"I should go." Phoebe stood up. She turned to Helga, and decided that she could stab this whole mess right through the belly of it, and they could return to normal. "I can't do this with you, only for you to decide it's a mistake. And then a week later, we're both pretending to laugh over it and you demand me to forget it. And my final word over the subject is: forgetting. We have moved past that, and we are both better than that."
Phoebe walked so swiftly away, that she did not notice the tears spilling down her cheeks. The air seemed to whip them away.
A/N: Wow, thanks for the reviews! I was planning on keeping this at a one-shot, but I want to know what happens, too.