Hey Guys! So chapter one is up! Hope you enjoy! Please R&R and tell me what you think!

Sputtering Kings Are a Rare Sight Indeed

Kiara had woken up from the sunlight that was currently streaming through her closed eyelids. She jammed her eyes shut and flipped over. "EBONY! Turn this stupid light off you Waker-Upper!" She then sighed when she heard no response. "EBONY?!"
She was about to bury her head in her pillow when she noticed how uncomfortable she currently was. She was certain that Ebony's theatre room never felt like a stack of hay and more like a King's bed (even if it was just the carpet). She wriggled and was aware of how scratchy the (unusually thin) blanket was. She was just starting to believe she had been kidnapped by slave selling ninjas in the middle of the night when she heard voices. Impossibly recognisable voices.

"Who is she?" An old, crackly voice whispered. "When did she get here?"
A younger and more frantic voice answered. "I don't know! I got back from cleaning Arthur's chambers and there she was!" There was a pause and the sound of feet shuffling. "I didn't do it!"
It was at that particular moment when the young man's earlier words sunk in.
Arthur's chambers.
Arthur.
Chambers.
Chambers.
Arthur.
ARTHUR'S CHAMBERS!

Kiara then bolted upright, flipping out of the small bed in the process. She hit the ground with a thud and quickly found her feet. She glanced at the room around her. Particular vases and bottle occupied the small window-sill and lying on top of the wooden table stood a thick book riddled with marvellous and beautiful pictures and symbols. It looked magnificent, not like something that could get you burned at the stake.

"No." She stated loudly. "No, no, no, no! Nope! Uh, uh. Not happening." She whirled around to find to very startled and inquisitive faces looking directly at her. One with an eyebrow in danger in getting caught in his silvery hair and the other with cheekbones that could rival the sharpness of glass. Kiara took one step forwards watching them watching her. "No! Not happening! I'm dreaming! Not real!" She shut hers eyes and pinched her arms. Nothing happened. "Go away! I'm not crazy! Not yet! I've lasted this long! Not happening! No, no, no, no!"
There as a cough and she opened her brown eyes. Both men were looking at her strangely.
The older one opened his mouth to speak. "Umm. May we inquire as to whom you are, madam?"
"Huh?" She walked over to them only a step away. "Well I'm outta my mind right now. You however aren't real."
They just both looked at each other at her remark and the younger one replied. "No madam. We are both most definitely real. I'm-"
"Merlin and you are Gaius!" She exasperated, ignoring their surprised gazes. "And I'm Kiara and that over there is Merlin's magic book. Can we stop pointing out the obvious and just focus on the fact that you're here!"
Merlin's wide eyes and Gaius's nervous shifting had Kiara going back on what she said. Merlin stuttered out.
"You know about-"
"The magic?" She nodded. "Yes. I'm sorry for scaring you like that, it's just that I seem to be stuck inside my head and talking to my hallucinations, so I feel a bit strange right now."
Gaius and Merlin glanced at each other and looked back at her. "I don't know who you are or where you came from but I can see that you are confused and by the way that you are dressed. . ." Kiara looked down at her Merlin shirt and green dragon boxers at Merlin's statement. "I believe that you weren't planning this."
Kiara nodded and glanced around the room. "Oh I most definitely was not planning this."

There was a lull in the conversation before Gaius took her arm and guided her to the wooden (and very dodgy) table. "Why don't you explain to us what happened."
Kiara just opened her mouth to speak when a very loud and very angry voice bellowed from above.
"GUARDS!"
Merlin was gone in an instant, the time it took Kiara to realise whose voice it was. "Arthur?"
Gaius looked at her strangely and nodded.
"I'm going to go see what happened. This is my own hallucination after all."

And that is how Kiara had found herself running around the castle, following a flash of blue and red. Merlin came to a halt at two large oak doors tried to barge down the door. She came up beside him and inspected the door.
He jumped a little and whispered quietly. "What are you doing here?"
She shrugged. "I wanted to see Prince (or maybe King) Prat in person." She paused and whirled on Merlin. She murmured quietly "Why don't you use magic?"
Merlin gaped a little a glanced around him. "There are guards at either corner and two right next to us, trying to get in."
"Oh! I didn't notice. If all you wanted was a distraction then you just had to ask." She whirled around and yelled at the top of her lungs. "SORCERER! THE SORCERER IS ESCAPING!"

Every single dim-witted guard turned to where she was pointing and cased after the distraction. She turned to Merlin. "See? Now magic this door! Quick march!"
Merlin turned to the door and whispered 'Tosprenge' and with a quick flash of gold, it was unlocked.
"That was so aweso-" Her words died in her throat when they crashed into the chambers and came face to face with a shirtless Arthur holding a sword to the throat of a small girl with dark hair and bright blue eyes. "Livvy?"
Both all three parties turned towards her and Olivia smiled. "Kiara!" She made to move but Arthur whipped his sword back to place.
"Who are you both?! What are you doing here?! Why are you dressed so strangely?!" Arthur demanded then turning to Merlin. "Who are they Merlin?! What have you done!?"
Merlin turned towards Arthur, shock across his features. "And I did this how?"
Arthur let his arm drop and took a step towards Merlin. "You always seem to get us stuck in the most deadly of sitiuations."
Merlin folded his arms across his chest. "No that's you and your habit of running into danger more times than I blink."
Athur's witty retort was drowned out by the giggles coming from either side of them. "They're so cute!" Kiara said.
Olivia nodded. "And they're the best of friends!"
Arthur and Merlin turned towards the intruders. "We are most certainly not cute!" Merlin nodded with him.
Both girls squealed and jumped up and down. "Aren't they just adorable!"
Arthur sputtered indignantly while Merlin looked between the girls in shock.
"Both of you! Over by the window now!" Arthur ordered.
Both strangers nodded and strode over to the window. Olivia turned to Kiara. "So what's your theory?"
Kiara chuckled. "At first I thought kidnapping by crazed ninjas-"
"Naturally."
"And then I decided upon very real hallucination."
Olivia smiled and nodded. "Same conclusion I came to. Good deduction Sherlock."
"It's elementary, Watson."

Both girls then looked towards the King and his Warlock, both of them listening to their conversation with growing confusion.
"Who are you!?" Arthur stepped forward. "And what business do you have in Camelot?"
They both sighed and Olivia stepped forward. "If our minds want us to play this game then we will." She took a deep breath. "Ok so I'm Olivia, and I come from the future." At their confused glances she elaborated. "The future is a place that is many thousands of years from now. The places and people of this time are a lot different from now and I can't be bothered to explain further."
Kiara continued. "I'm Kiara. So basically we come from a time when you guys aren't real, you are a type of moving picture called a T.V show and you two are played by actors. The show follows Merlin and Arthur through their journey throughout ten years. It talks about tragedy, secrets, lies, betrayel and for some reason I feel as though I'm advertising The Bold and Beautiful."
Olivia chuckled. "Very….Dramatic."
"Aren't I." Kiara gazed out in the distance in a very accurate and dramatic way.
"Impossible!" Arthur snapped, raising his sword.

"Okay we can prove it!" Kiara held her hands up in surrender. "I know that Merlin was sent to Camelot by his mother and he first met Arthur when he was throwing daggers at a serving boy."
Olivia continued. "This resulted in Merlin being thrown in the dungeons but it wasn't the end of your commaderie. You met twice after, first when Arthur beat Merlin with a broom and the second being when Merlin saved Arthur's life."
"And at first you hated each other but then Arthur became less of a prat and Merlin became more mature. You guys began bonding and now each of you would risk your life for the other without question."
"Anyone could know that! It is still sorcery! Everyone in the kingdom knows Merlin and I are friends."
Kiara sighed and then looked at Merlin. "Okay I have something else." She took a deep breath. "Okay. What about the heirloom?" At their confused looks Kiara ploughed on. "During Morgana's last take to the throne, Arthur had given you, Merlin, his mother's medallion."
Arthur suddenly became shifty and uncomfortable. "Umm-well-there was-it is to say-"
Olivia stepped forward. "See! No one would know that!" She paused and smirked. "But it was so ADORABLE and I can't believe they cut it!"
Kiara turned, suddenly ignoring Arthur and Merlin. "I KNOW RIGHT! It showed their wonderful Bromance amazingly!"

Arthur was at a loss for words as the two girls chittered on about 'how the writers are uncreative dickheads who don't know a good scene if it came and punched them in the face'. He looked at Merlin and felt his spirit rise at his obvious confusion. (So it wasn't just him).
"So I take it that you came here through sorcery." Arthur sneered, snatching the girls attention once again. "I believe you know that such practises are band."
Kiara stepped forward. "A many a battle you have won from the likes of the mysterious and untameable-ness that is witchcraft. You may do well to consider its ability to do more than create madness."
At Arthur's confused look Olivia stepped forward. "She means that we have no idea whatsoever of how we got here."
"Egzactly!" Kiara nodded with a pointed finger. "Wait wha-"
"Never mind that! I am the king of Camelot and you will tell me what business you have here or I shall send you to the dungeons." Arthur scowled.
"Can I just point something out?" Kiara ventured.
Olivia facepalmed. "No. No you cannot. You'll get us executed."
"You wound me. You know I am smarter than all of you in this room? I can't expect you-"
"Okay! You can stop Sherlocking all over the place. You're giving me Reichenbach feels." Olivia sobbed.
Kiara immediately rushed to her friend's side. "I know Livvy, let it out. You can blame Moffat, just blame Moffat."
Olivia breathed deep and resolved. "I, Olivia Brunton, will forever and ever blame Moffat for the constant feel-bashing that Fangirls receive. Amen."
Kiara padded her back. "Touché."

Both girls turned to their hosts to find them staring at them, jaws dropped and eyes wide in confusion. Arthur sputtered while Merlin just looked back and forth between us.
"I think. ." Merlin started. "I think they are suffering from a grave disease-"
"A grave, grave, grave disease." Olivia put in.
"-And it makes then insane and not really a threat to us. I mean look at them."

Arthur looked at the girls first sobbing about something called 'Moffat' and 'Deduction' then started giggling at something called 'slash' and he agreed whole heartedly.
"So why are you dressed so strangely?" Merlin inquired. Arthur admitted he was also curious as to why the young girls were wearing such loose shifts and short and colourful breeches.
Both girls stopped giggling and turned to the prince and warlock.
Olivia shrugged. "These clothes are our Pj's. It's what we wear when we go to sleep."
"In our world it is normal for girls to wear such things, especially in Australia where it's hot like a sauna of a night." Kiara muttered darkly.
Merlin hummed in confusion but carried on. "So the women of your day do not have to wear dresses?"
Kiara shook her head. "No, we don't have to. Personally I just stay in my night clothes all day."
Merlin gaped and Olivia grinned.
Arthur stepped forward and peered at the shirts. "What does these pictures and words symbolise."

"My shirt is Pendragon red-" Arthur gaped. "And this is a cartoon of the man himself, King Prat!"

Kiara and Olivia made trumpet noises.

Merlin and Arthur choked simultaneously.

(They then needed some intense 'Whack-On-The-Back' action.)

After Merlin recovered from is near-death experience, he managed to sputter out a strangled. "So I'm guessing your shirt is the same?"
Kiara shook her head. "Nup! Mine is a cartoon of the gorgeous, yet humble, Clotpole War-"
Olivia very pointedly squished Kiara's toes to a pulp. "Manservant! It says Clotpole Manservant!"
Kiara caught her drift and smoothly covered up her slip up. "It most certainly does say Manservant. Nothing incriminating on this shirt. Uther won't hang no-one due to this shirt! Nah uh!"
Olivia face palmed. Again. "Smooth Kiara."
"Thankyou!"

The girls turned to see a gaping Merlin and Arthur. Only difference being Merlin's cheeks were tinged a rosy pink.
"Umm, what did you just-" Merlin started.
Arthur interrupted barely able to conceal his shock. "Gorgeous?! Merlin's not-I mean-how would you-he's just Merlin!"
Kiara back tracked through what she just said. "Oh! You're talking about when I called him gorgeous!"
Arthur and Merlin nodded frantically.
"Well he is!" Kiara flailed in Merlin's direction. "Look at him! He's tall, lean, has the most amazing eyes and his cheekbones are just- ughh I can't even find words! I mean just look at his face!" To prove it, Kiara grabbed his chin and shook his face a little. "He has the best voice, all deep and awesome and Irish."
Merlin jumped out of her grasp and maybe hid behind Arthur. Maybe. "What's Irish?"
Olivia stepped in. "She won't be talking for the next ten minutes. And don't worry about the Irish thing, she's just talking about Colin." At their confused glances, she shook her head. "I am not explaining, I am too young for this."
Arthur rounded on Olivia. "So your friend does find Merlin attractive?"
"Yep! Extremely so." She giggled at Merlin's uncomfortable shifting. "Along with half of the British population. Both female and sometimes probably male."
Both of them blanched at her words. "But-"
She held up her hand. "Don't even. Kiara will never stop laughing her arse off at the irony if you two asked. "
They held up their hands just as Kiara returned to the conversation. "What were you guys chatting about?"
"Baseball."
"Jousting."
"Dresses."

They all stopped and looked at Merlin, suspicion in their eyes.
"What? It was the first thing that popped into my head!"

Arthur thwacked him on the head, not noticing the girl's giggling fest. "You are such a girl Merlin!"
"I am not!" Merlin sputtered. "I'm pretty sure women aren't supposed to have- you know-" he waved his hands awkwardly.
"Bits?" Olivia suggested, failing to hide a smile.
Arthur and Merlin were suddenly very interested in the floor as a royal flush rose to their cheeks.
Kiara burst out laughing. "Oh, the irony!"
Olivia soon followed. "Iron has nothing on this irony!"
"What does that even mean?!" Kiara cackled loudly.
Olivia shrugged, gasping for air. "I don't even know!"

To Arthur and Merlin's confusion (they seemed to be a lot confused today) they both turned on them and yelled.
"MORNING MERLIN FANS! TODAY. . . PARK ASTRIX!"

Arthur decided he needed a chair.
Merlin looked like a star struck whale.
Kiara and Olivia were singing 'je ne quoi pas pas je sais anglais! Hey Hey!

What?