A/N: Apologies that this took so long – I have been on vacation and teetering on the idea of leaving this as a one shot but I decided I wanted more Spanna in my life, so here's the second part!
This does contain slight spoilers for anyone who hasn't seen the earlier episodes of season seven.
"It is in herself she will find the strength she needs."
She decided to run. Run faster than she ever had before, because she wasn't ready to give up just yet. For a few dark moments, she had thought about how much easier it would be to say goodbye to the mess she had found herself in this time, but then she remembered all the good things. The great things. And she decided to run.
It wasn't until she stepped out of Mary Drake's car that she realised just how much pain she was in – adrenaline had been coursing through her veins until safety was so close. She could see Spencer's house, the lights were on and everyone's cars were parked in the street and it was the first moment since her escape that she had felt the toll the past twenty-four hours had on her body.
She dropped the blanket from her body, forgetting all about the woman who still seemed so suspicious, as she stumbled from the car and took a moment to look around. A few hours before she had considered never seeing her friends again, and now she was hoping for their comfort. Her body trembled, the regret started to bubble inside of her – she had escaped a mad man and she had come to the house of someone she loved, that happened to be where her best friends were right then, she had put them all in danger. If he came after her, which she feared he would, she had just put the lives of all her friends in jeopardy.
How selfish could she be?
She barely had time to answer her own thoughts as arms wrapped around her and the distinct sound of sobs could be heard, accompanied by cries of relief. She thought she heard someone whisper that they had done it and she wanted to ask what they had done because she had escaped, they had never come for her when she needed them the most. What could they have possibly done that led to her being there right then?
Her anger had no time to process when she realised just who was holding her and she took advantage of the moment to wrap her arms tightly around Spencer, her fingers curling around the other girls jumper as she closed her eyes and hid her face in the crook of the brunette's neck. She was safe, no matter what had happened, and no matter how little help she had thought them to be since she had been taken, she was finally safe and it was all she needed right then.
Everything after that momentary relief was a blur, moments of whispered words of comfort, tears when Hanna flinched away from innocent touches, murmured words behind her back. Hanna didn't understand what was happening as each passing second added to the pressure she felt on her chest as her heart thumped uncomfortably. Luckily, one person seemed to sense her obvious discomfort and led her outside, towards the barn she knew to be Spencer's – and Caleb's – home. She followed blindly, her hand holding onto Spencer's tightly as she tried to steady her breathing, trying to remember when her last panic attack had been.
"Hanna," Her voice was gentle, softer than the twenty-three year old had ever heard her best friend speak and eventually, her blue eyes met with chocolate as she bit down on her lip in a futile attempt to stop the tears from falling. When had she started crying? She wasn't entirely certain but as her fingers lifted to her cheek, she could feel the wetness and she could see the concern in Spencer's eyes but she had no idea what she could say or do to make that look of complete pain leave the other woman's eyes. She wondered if Spencer felt as hopeless as she did right then and then she remembered, it was Spencer Hastings, of course she did.
"Let's get you cleaned up and into something warm, okay?" It was almost as though she was talking to a child, but neither of them truly knew what was right in this situation. Hanna could only nod her head as she followed Spencer towards the bathroom, watching the woman turn on the shower and check the temperature before she turned back to her waiting best friend who just stood there awkwardly, arms wrapped around herself, her eyes never leaving Spencer as though she was the only thing anchoring Hanna to reality right then.
Spencer didn't say anything, she just set about getting some towels ready and then, giving her best friend a small smile, she went to walk past her, stopped only by Hanna's hand grabbing her arm and then a whisper, "Will you stay?" The words came out before Hanna could stop them, the desperation in her eyes and the fear in her voice being enough to make Spencer nod her head, her fingers moving gently to Hanna's cheek as she took a deep breath.
"Always." Came her reply and Hanna felt her heart flutter, because despite everything that had happened, that one word she had imagined had been something she had clung onto and there it was. Hanna would never forget the words Spencer had spoken to her that had made sure she was standing right in front of her in that moment.
Her hand dropped from Spencer's arm to slowly pull the dirtied vest over her head, trying to ignore the slight gasp that fell from Spencer's lips when she saw the true extent of what their new tormentor had done to her. Her eyes glanced towards the running shower, and she didn't have to say a word for Spencer to understand what she needed right then. It was only a few seconds later that a completely naked Hanna and a fully clothed Spencer stepped into the shower, Hanna clinging onto her best friend, barely trusting her feet to keep her standing right then as the water washed over her. The last time she had felt water on her skin, it had been ice cold and done only with malicious intent – she could remember opening her dry mouth just to get a taste of the liquid because she knew it would be her only chance. She couldn't even remember how long a human could go without liquids, but somehow it didn't seem that long ago that she had been involved in a discussion with her best friends as they huddled up together and realised they could die.
Her eyes closed and her body shook as she did her best to stay in the present, her grip tightening on Spencer, who just whispered words of comfort as she gently washed the dried dirt, and specks of dried blood from her best friend's body. Hanna didn't know how long it was until she felt her heartbeat return to normal, and her eyes opened to look at the person who somehow managed to feign calmness even in the most stressful of moments. Spencer was the person she needed right then,she wasn't sure she trusted anyone else not to burst into tears, or ask if she wanted to talk about it and then pester her when she said she didn't. Spencer didn't say a word, she just did what Hanna needed her to do right then and she had no idea how she was going to thank her for just being her right then.
When they stepped out of the shower, Spencer focused entirely on Hanna, gently wrapping the towel around her before she fumbled around for the first aid kit as she mumbled about having to make sure Hanna didn't get an infection. Hanna had already refused hospital treatment and no one seemed to understand why, but no one questioned her about it just yet. She didn't want to go, and Hanna knew that no one could and no one would force her into doing something she saw as a hopeless task. There was nothing any hospital doctor could do for her right then other than ask questions she didn't want to answer.
They were silent for a while, as Spencer busied herself with Hanna's wounds, muttering to herself about how she was going to kill whoever did this to her as Hanna pretended not to hear her. She wondered if they would ever find him, but then she had no idea what to do if they did. It wasn't as though real justice existed, not in Rosewood, anyway.
Once she was sat on the bed, tugging on the sleeves of a jumper Spencer had helped her into, she glanced at her oldest friend, watching the brunette get changed out of her wet clothes and into something else. When Hanna spoke, she froze for just a moment before she cleared her throat, her cheeks turning red and Hanna could tell she was searching for an answer, "Do you love him?" Hanna had asked, her voice quiet, her eyes looking away from Spencer as she stared down at the floor.
"I don't know." Came the answer, and Hanna wasn't sure if that hurt just as much as 'yes' would have, or if the pain was somehow eased because Spencer not knowing meant that maybe she had a chance. She gulped, holding back the tears that glistened in her eyes as she looked back up at Spencer and gave her a small smile, that appeared as more of a grimace, "I don't love Jordan," She admitted, with a small shrug, "Or Caleb..." She had seen the look in Spencer's eyes when she had first spoken and she had to get it out there before she assumed.
"Did he tell you that we kissed?" Her heart ached when Spencer shook her head, shock and betrayal coating her features and Hanna wanted nothing more than to run out of there and shake Caleb and ask him why. Why would be lie to the girl he was lucky to have?
"Before I was taken, we were alone in that motel room and for a moment, it was like I was seventeen again and everything was as it was. He was my safety net and it was all I needed in that moment and he kissed me and I kissed him back... but it was over as quickly as it happened, I never wanted to hurt you... or go behind your back." Spencer still hadn't said anything, and Hanna wasn't sure what she could say to make any of it right. "I don't know why it happened, it wasn't him I've been wanting to kiss since we got back here. When you told me you had feelings for him, I was jealous but not of you."
It was out there, the words were out there before she could even take them back and life was so short, Hanna wasn't even sure she wanted to hide anymore. "Can you say something? Shout, cry, slap me... anything?" The tears continued to fall as Hanna shook her head, "I just wanted you to know because you're the reason I'm here and you have no idea. You were in there with me, not really but in a dream and you helped me and now I'm here because of what you said and you're standing there, with no idea that you helped me more than you could ever imagine and I have no idea how I could make that up to you because I kissed your boyfriend and you probably hate me and I wouldn't blame you..." Her panicked, tear filled rant was cut off by Spencer's forehead pressing against her own, their noses nudging together as Spencer brought her hands to Hanna's cheek and gently wiped away the tears that were still falling.
"Stop." She whispered, "No, I don't love him and no, I don't hate you... we'll talk about this when you're not exhausted and starving but for now, let's just forget it, okay? We'll go in there, get you something to eat, something to drink and you need to sleep. We'll talk, I promise but not now, not after what you've been through." Her lips pressed against Hanna's forehead once again, and then her nose before she hesitated at her lips, pulling back before they could meet.
And as her hand fell into Hanna's, pulling her up, the blonde felt something she had previously thought she wouldn't feel again – hope.